My Pointless Soapbox

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Replies

  • Keep_The_Laughter
    Keep_The_Laughter Posts: 183 Member
    The one thing I always see in threads like this that makes me laugh the most is the assertion that "mean people" are just mean because "it's the internet and they are saying things they wouldn't say in real life."

    In my life experience, I have met very few people in life who act differently in real life than they do on the internet. If you think people are acting way differently online than they would in person, that kind of says a lot more about how you act online, not everyone else.

    I don't act or speak any differently if I'm talking to someone online, through a text message, or face to face. I assume, based on my actions and the people around me, that most everyone else acts the same. If you think differently, I would probably guess you act differently online than in real life, and what does that say about you?

    The perception of consequences does impact the way people behave online. Any number of stories about people going online making death threats, threatening of any number of types of violence, throwing around racial/ethnic slurs and then getting butthurt when there are actual real life consequences to their actions suggests that OP is onto something.

    http://www.3news.co.nz/Charlotte-Dawson-confronts-cyber-bullies/tabid/418/articleID/273958/Default.aspx#.Uo4xbWSxNaE
    This type of behavior has been going on far longer than the internet was a thing. Pretty sure organizations like the KKK haven't needed the internet to throw around racial slurs, make death threats, threats of violence, actual violent acts, etc. To say this kind of behavior is around and prevalent only on the internet, or just because people are on the internet now is pure ignorance of reality, and basically looking to use the internet as the newest scapegoat.

    I think (well, I thought) we all know that the reason people are ****s on the internet is because of the anonymity. You can't be held accountable if nobody knows who you are.

    Sounds kind of ... similar, hey?
    3288226-5185847709-origi.jpg

    ^^^Pretty much what you just said^^^...There are behavioral scientists in multiple fields trying to counter toxic behavior in online communities. Businesses from gaming to mainstream news outlets are trying to reconcile how to stop the trolling, threats, insults and otherwise degrading/rude commentary in their online communities without forcing people to reveal identifiable information. Riot Games and the Huffington Post are two good examples. As it relates to this thread...the OP was making sense.
  • tlab827
    tlab827 Posts: 155 Member
    ... Think about all the shame and pain a person has to be carrying around already to drive them to try living on 500 calories a day....

    ^^^ This alone is enough to be kind and helpful instead of blunt and hurtful. Thank you for posting.

    ^^ I couldn't agree with you both more. Bite your tongue (or fingers) and make a conscious effort to be kind and compassionate.
  • QuietBloom
    QuietBloom Posts: 5,413 Member
    Honestly, I have tried to refute your argument a few times now but keep stumbling. I think that you are, for the most part, correct. I have even tried to "soften my tone" when offering people advice on the forums and avoiding being overly critical. Except in the cases of someone who is promoting an unsafe method to another or telling another that X is the only way to do Y.


    However, you have to understand the frustration that comes along with helping people on MFP. A small group of people here try to promote ways of eating that are backed by science and are constantly trying to educate those who are ignorant of nutrition. Because they are going against the "common wisdom" of dieting, they get a lot of unwarranted angst from people who call them rude, haters, and various other nasty names. Also, the same threads are posted over and over again, multiple times per day, with few users actually paying attention to the thread three lines down and instead posting an identical thread above it. And this is despite several excellent stickied threads that would have answered their questions.

    It is frustrating, to say the least, to have to keep repeating the same information and refuting the same information over and over again to a user base who, largely, does not appreciate it or pass on what they have learned.

    What he said.
  • QuietBloom
    QuietBloom Posts: 5,413 Member
    Some on MFP say we're all here for the same reason. I just don't buy that in total. Most are here to get healthy. But how we get there is a very individual experience. We all have to eat at a calorie deficit and exercise - but our reasons for being overweight are individual. You never know when what you say may ignite the spark in someone reading your comments. So, having ALL people comment on posts is helpful. Read what works or speaks to you. Disregard the rest. We're adults here.

    Crux. I have seen endless threads where the OP feels to need to argue each and every opinion they don't agree with or didn't feel that they had asked for. CLUE: You are posting on a public forum. Expect to hear from EVERYONE.
  • ILiftHeavyAcrylics
    ILiftHeavyAcrylics Posts: 27,732 Member
    I think if you're going to compare MFP users to the KKK you'd better have some examples of truly deplorable behavior that support your comparison. Otherwise it's a pretty inflammatory thing to say.

    Much more insulting than any of the comments I see being called rude on a daily basis.
  • 1LoveChips
    1LoveChips Posts: 260 Member
    I still don't know where this is going; MFP staff must be at their wits end too, advertising for moderators on Facebook :)
  • ekz13
    ekz13 Posts: 725 Member
    I think if you're going to compare MFP users to the KKK you'd better have some examples of truly deplorable behavior that support your comparison. Otherwise it's a pretty inflammatory thing to say.

    Much more insulting than any of the comments I see being called rude on a daily basis.

    I agree, that's quite the stretch, and frankly, I think that's pretty damn childish comparing someone with an opinion different from yours to being a racist hate mongering bigot. Not even close.
  • tigersword
    tigersword Posts: 8,059 Member
    I think if you're going to compare MFP users to the KKK you'd better have some examples of truly deplorable behavior that support your comparison. Otherwise it's a pretty inflammatory thing to say.

    Much more insulting than any of the comments I see being called rude on a daily basis.
    Who's comparing MFP users to the KKK? People are making posts that internet users throw around racial slurs and threats of violence purely due to anonymity. I used the KKK to refute that argument. People have been making death threats and throwing around racial slurs probably a couple thousand years before the internet existed. The KKK was just one organized group.

    Oh, and to respond to the person posting the KKK in uniform, the white hoods were for intimidation and to hide their faces while committing criminal acts, not to hide their membership. KKK membership was public, they didn't hide the fact that they were members, and they didn't need to wear the hoods to spread their violence and hate.

    MFP is tame compared to most internet sites, and it's REALLY tame compared to the real world.
  • sassyjae21
    sassyjae21 Posts: 1,217 Member
    Hey!!!! Where did the white hooders come from??! *hiss*

    lol
  • debrag12
    debrag12 Posts: 1,071 Member
    I just left a thread on a popular social networking site where an opinion was expressed about how fat people should be forced to pay extra any time they use any sort of transportation other than their own cars. There was a lot of supporters, many who expressed their thought that obese people are disgusting, ugly, smelly, and essentially wastes of flesh.

    As a business I totally agree with that. Say on a plane, if it's not a full flight and they don't need the seat then they should get a refund for the extra, though that would be hell to put in practice. People pay for 1 seat but expect to get 2?
  • ndj1979
    ndj1979 Posts: 29,136 Member
    agrees with title of thread = pointless
  • hookilau
    hookilau Posts: 3,134 Member
    hey!!!
    I've got a pointless soapbox tooo :tongue: but when I feel like breaking it out, I do this instead....
    tumblr_mr0zx5J8zM1saa8d8o1_500.gif

    Turn round! :grumble:

    schmidt.gif
  • runs_in_heels
    runs_in_heels Posts: 97 Member
    OP, totally off the subject (because I really don't care), but every time I see your profile pic it makes me think of an actress from one of those old TV shows..... who do you look like dammit! It's driving me crazy!

    She's that girl from "Facts of Life?" Blair?


    Or Topanga from "Boy Meets World"?


    Google supplied me with some serious flashbacks!

    I miss old sitcoms!

    i was going to say Valerie Bertinelli in her current look (which is pretty damn good!)
  • hookilau
    hookilau Posts: 3,134 Member
    Hey!!!! Where did the white hooders come from??! *hiss*

    lol

    I totally read that as 'hooters' :laugh:

    MI.jpg

    ETA: since I'm not white, I was wondering the same thing :blushing:
  • sassyjae21
    sassyjae21 Posts: 1,217 Member
    Hey!!!! Where did the white hooders come from??! *hiss*

    lol

    I totally read that as 'hooters' :laugh:

    MI.jpg

    ETA: since I'm not white, I was wondering the same thing :blushing:

    haha!! Mindy!!
  • ILiftHeavyAcrylics
    ILiftHeavyAcrylics Posts: 27,732 Member
    I think if you're going to compare MFP users to the KKK you'd better have some examples of truly deplorable behavior that support your comparison. Otherwise it's a pretty inflammatory thing to say.

    Much more insulting than any of the comments I see being called rude on a daily basis.
    Who's comparing MFP users to the KKK? People are making posts that internet users throw around racial slurs and threats of violence purely due to anonymity. I used the KKK to refute that argument. People have been making death threats and throwing around racial slurs probably a couple thousand years before the internet existed. The KKK was just one organized group.

    Oh, and to respond to the person posting the KKK in uniform, the white hoods were for intimidation and to hide their faces while committing criminal acts, not to hide their membership. KKK membership was public, they didn't hide the fact that they were members, and they didn't need to wear the hoods to spread their violence and hate.

    MFP is tame compared to most internet sites, and it's REALLY tame compared to the real world.

    I should have quoted. I wasn't talking about your KKK post, I was talking about the one that says:
    I think (well, I thought) we all know that the reason people are ****s on the internet is because of the anonymity. You can't be held accountable if nobody knows who you are.

    Sounds kind of ... similar, hey?

    right above the picture of the Klan.


    You and I are agreed.
  • BrettWithPKU
    BrettWithPKU Posts: 575 Member
    Sounds like you got some real winners on your unnamed "popular social networking site".

    I actually recently de-activated my account on one such popular social networking site, because acquaintances assumed I wanted to be constantly informed of updates to their online family photo albums (yeah, I didn't). And other people on that site simply cannot be counted on for a serious response to anything--especially a serious question.

    If you want a fair, respectful and thoughtful debate on a social networking site, good luck.

    The closest thing I've found is an unnamed popular BUSINESS networking website, which regrettably many people see it as little more than a job-hunting tool. But you can find respectful debate on anything you like on that website, provided you know where to look.
  • tigersword
    tigersword Posts: 8,059 Member
    I think if you're going to compare MFP users to the KKK you'd better have some examples of truly deplorable behavior that support your comparison. Otherwise it's a pretty inflammatory thing to say.

    Much more insulting than any of the comments I see being called rude on a daily basis.
    Who's comparing MFP users to the KKK? People are making posts that internet users throw around racial slurs and threats of violence purely due to anonymity. I used the KKK to refute that argument. People have been making death threats and throwing around racial slurs probably a couple thousand years before the internet existed. The KKK was just one organized group.

    Oh, and to respond to the person posting the KKK in uniform, the white hoods were for intimidation and to hide their faces while committing criminal acts, not to hide their membership. KKK membership was public, they didn't hide the fact that they were members, and they didn't need to wear the hoods to spread their violence and hate.

    MFP is tame compared to most internet sites, and it's REALLY tame compared to the real world.

    I should have quoted. I wasn't talking about your KKK post, I was talking about the one that says:
    I think (well, I thought) we all know that the reason people are ****s on the internet is because of the anonymity. You can't be held accountable if nobody knows who you are.

    Sounds kind of ... similar, hey?

    right above the picture of the Klan.


    You and I are agreed.
    Ahh, I misread. That's ok, my point needed the clarification anyway. :laugh:

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