Achieved Goal, feeling dissappointed
Replies
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One of the greatest things I have ever heard is comparison is the thief of happiness....so true.
Wow... this is going to be my new signature...0 -
Thank you everyone for your support.
*sigh* weight training. I just can't seem to wrap my head around it.
1. I can't afford a gym membership right now.
2. tiny little house, so no place to put a home gym
3. the above two are my favorite excuses to use to deflect the fact that I don't like the idea of weight training!
I have 2lbs and 5lbs weights at home that I use irregularity...yes I know that won't cut it. I was thinking about Pilates or yoga in the new year.
I guess it's more about learning not to compare myself to other thinner people and learning to be happy with who I am...but is that settling? Should I always push myself? I agree, maybe I need to stop looking at the number now, I'll redo my measurements and I'll work at strengthening my core, and strengthening my mind.
I have felt just like you feel...it is so disheartening to lose weight and just be a smaller/lighter version of the person you was before you started to try to reach you goal.
But as much as you make excuses (just as I did) the only way to get in shape is to start to use resistance/weights.
You do not need a home gym/membership.
You can get a resistance band of amazon really cheap, or any lifting of any household item will help. vacuum cleaner/laundry basket...just lift it0 -
Maybe every morning I'll look in the mirror and say "you look smoking hot today". :happy:
I think you should.0 -
I feel the exact same way, though my goal was only small to begin with. I know that I don't really want to lose much more weight because it doesn't suit me. Instead I've been focussing on doing lots of different exercises to try and tone up.0
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Thank you everyone for your support.
*sigh* weight training. I just can't seem to wrap my head around it.
1. I can't afford a gym membership right now.
2. tiny little house, so no place to put a home gym
3. the above two are my favorite excuses to use to deflect the fact that I don't like the idea of weight training!
I have 2lbs and 5lbs weights at home that I use irregularity...yes I know that won't cut it. I was thinking about Pilates or yoga in the new year.
I guess it's more about learning not to compare myself to other thinner people and learning to be happy with who I am...but is that settling? Should I always push myself? I agree, maybe I need to stop looking at the number now, I'll redo my measurements and I'll work at strengthening my core, and strengthening my mind.
Try strength training that incorporates body weight exercises ... pushups, lunges, box jumps, etc., etc. There are also lots of video programs you can do at home and routines you can find on-line. Take a look at exercise routines incorporating TRX Suspension training. While the TRX brand straps are very expensive, there are cost-effective knock offs available through Amazon and other on-line resources.
Not having a gym membership is never an excuse for good health and strong bodies!!0 -
A lot of people go through this. I reached my goal and I wasn't happy with what I saw. I started lifting and stopped focusing on the scale. I have seen huge improvements but I'm still not satisfied. I've come to realize that I will never be satisfied. I will strive to better and better. I continue to make new goals for myself that don't necessarily have to do with weight or body composition. You don't need weights for strength training. I would suggest investing in some bands. They are fairly cheap and small.0
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Everyone thats replied basically has covered everything but firstly well done on your weight loss you've got this far and its so important to remember that and be proud of yourself for it, seriously wish I could take my own advice sometimes :P I too got down to my desired weight loss last may i couldn't quite believe it for ages, I was happy enough with myself but I guess I did want to work on my body image a lot more, I think from reading this thread alone and others we will always strive to be better or push ourselves and sometimes in the middle of that you can forget how far you have come so don't be afraid to give yourself a pat on the back every now and again .
With regards where to go from here, I'll agree with what others have said about bodyweight/strength training, I have found it so beneficial and even still i'm only in the learning stages, i'm not on a proper program at the moment but I did go to classes in august and found these very helpful for form, its not for everyone but i'd recommend if there was any classes on near you you might find these good, i found them very helpful for introducing me to training - re proper form etc. It also gave me some ideas for workouts to do at home.
I don't follow this whole Toneitup schedule/nutrition plan but I do try some of the total body workouts they throw up online sometimes, they're a handy way of getting some bodyweight training in at home with a pair of dumbbells, just to give you an idea the frisky fall full body routine:
http://toneitup.com/2013/10/new-full-body-routine-october-calendar/
Might be of no interest to you but just to give you an idea, whatever you decide to do well done on how far you have come, some have suggested Julian Michaels dvds, i did the shred as i was loosing and found it really good for loosing inches. Best of luck!0 -
Congratulations, you did it! Yeh, a big concern for many of us. So far I don't see much on myself, but I had a friend that quit dieting because her daughter told her that her skin hung on her face and neck, and made her look old. I thought she looked wonderful. I think that we are harder on ourselves though. Extra water drinking above 8 glasses is supposed to help us hold volume in our skin so I am trying to do that too. Don't know how I will look when my 50 pounds are finished. I see more cellulite though on thighs and I notice my skin is looser on my upper legs as well.0
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You should probably start putting more emphasis on body composition/re-comp...dieting and cardio isn't going to cut it...you need to do resistance work. Most people eventually realize that dieting and cardio alone is not what is going to give them the body/physique they are looking for...that physique comes with resistance work...namely weight training.
Congrats and be proud of yourself. That's an amazing goal to achieve!!! But I know how you feel, I felt exactly the same way as you until I started resistance training. That's the only thing that's made a difference to what I actually see in the mirror.0 -
I think people would be more happy if they have a goal bodyfat percentage rather than a goal weight since being fat or lean has nothing to do with your weight.
BF % is very hard to measure accurately. And weight certainly has something to do with it. Just not everything.
But inches are decent proxy, controlling for height and weight.
So how does being fat or being lean relate to weight? If I was 300lbs would that make me fat? What if I had full on sixpack at that weight?0 -
I used to run marathons and stayed light although, unlike most runners, I wasn't eating only heathy food. I ate lots of everything I fancied because I could afford to. Then I was injured, still ate like a runner but no longer ran, so of course I picked up lots of weight.
Since joining mfp, I lost the 7kg I wanted to lose (well, I actually wanted to lose 9 because that would bring me back to what I was when I was running) but then everyone started commenting on how thin I was (which isn't really true, they just didn't know me or remember what I looked like when I ran marathons) so I decided to call a halt.
Unfortunately, I then reverted to all the bad habits - big portions, lots of snacking. With the return of the bad habits I fear return of the weight., though I'm still doing the 40-60 min walk after supper in addition to my usual hour per day of running, biking yoga or swimming and the scales at the gym say I'm not losing or gaining (other than the 500g this or that way every week)
Those evenings reading the paper or watching TV are terrible - I guzzle all the treats left over from the big bake-in I do every weekend when my daughter comes home. Tonight it was 4 biscuits and an apple turnover? Then a bowl of seafood rice left over from supper. I unashamedly eat twice what my husband eats and while he has a biscuit after supper, I'd have several plus yoghurt and whatever is around. I can't seem to stop eating. It's just non-stop guzzling from about 9pm till I go to bed at midnight!
I've tried instilling some discipline by treating myself to a couple of pairs of new trousers because my clothes are now too loose, but I don't know if this won't be a waste, the way I'm eating. Any ideas of how to regain the mindset which helped me lose weight?0 -
I kind of had this but then I directed my energies into my fitness level and seeing all I could now do with my "new" body. I learned, at this weight, I could do a lot of very enjoyable things (yoga, biking etc...) at a level I could not do before. This has become my motivation for maintaining my weight and gotten me away from how I "look" to what I can "do". By the way, doing all these new fitness things is bringing me the "look" I want without obsessing over it. Funny how that works. Best of luck and congratulations!
precisely. I never thought i could walk 3 miles and still have energy to go on to the next set of activities. The old me would have never even tried.0 -
I used to run marathons and stayed light although, unlike most runners, I wasn't eating only heathy food. I ate lots of everything I fancied because I could afford to. Then I was injured, still ate like a runner but no longer ran, so of course I picked up lots of weight.
Since joining mfp, I lost the 7kg I wanted to lose (well, I actually wanted to lose 9 because that would bring me back to what I was when I was running) but then everyone started commenting on how thin I was (which isn't really true, they just didn't know me or remember what I looked like when I ran marathons) so I decided to call a halt.
Unfortunately, I then reverted to all the bad habits - big portions, lots of snacking. With the return of the bad habits I fear return of the weight., though I'm still doing the 40-60 min walk after supper in addition to my usual hour per day of running, biking yoga or swimming and the scales at the gym say I'm not losing or gaining (other than the 500g this or that way every week)
Those evenings reading the paper or watching TV are terrible - I guzzle all the treats left over from the big bake-in I do every weekend when my daughter comes home. Tonight it was 4 biscuits and an apple turnover? Then a bowl of seafood rice left over from supper. I unashamedly eat twice what my husband eats and while he has a biscuit after supper, I'd have several plus yoghurt and whatever is around. I can't seem to stop eating. It's just non-stop guzzling from about 9pm till I go to bed at midnight!
I've tried instilling some discipline by treating myself to a couple of pairs of new trousers because my clothes are now too loose, but I don't know if this won't be a waste, the way I'm eating. Any ideas of how to regain the mindset which helped me lose weight?
As a compusive eater myself...you simply have to set limits like. NOT BUYING JUNK. Tell your kids...don't bring your crap in the house. If people dont' like it...too fing bad. Remember that you cannot allow people to be enablers. I know how you feel.0 -
bump. I may need this at some point.0
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Didn't read the entire thread, but I saw someone recommended You Are Your Own Gym. I tried it earlier this year, and it was too hard for me. But then I found Body By You, also by Mark Lauren, which has easier progressions. It's still a challenge, but I'm noticeably stronger than I was. I've seen this improvement even though I've been really lax about following the program (shame on me, time to go do a workout). Even though I'm trying to lose weight, I haven't really lost any since starting this, but people have said I look different. And each time I move on to a harder exercise, it gives me a confidence boost that translates to a more positive body image.0
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I didn't think I would like weight training either, but the first time I lifted heavy, I loved the feeling of being sore, n using my muscles. It gave me a sense of empowerment and strength, and I fell in love with it. The fact that I can now do pushups is huge for me. Most of the women I know can't even do one, and I do 30! I wasn't able to do any when I started either, and I'm not talking girlie pushups. I bought a weight bench from walmart for $100, and it's the best investment I ever made. I had to buy some heavier dumbells too. I do New Rules of Weightlifting for Women. It's a book, and it's great!!! Lots of good info in there, and kick butt routines!!! The first few weeks, I saw some really great improvements in my body and strength. Good luck to you, and congratulations on your success!!! ))0
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Thank you everyone for your support.
*sigh* weight training. I just can't seem to wrap my head around it.
1. I can't afford a gym membership right now.
2. tiny little house, so no place to put a home gym
3. the above two are my favorite excuses to use to deflect the fact that I don't like the idea of weight training!
I have 2lbs and 5lbs weights at home that I use irregularity...yes I know that won't cut it. I was thinking about Pilates or yoga in the new year.
I guess it's more about learning not to compare myself to other thinner people and learning to be happy with who I am...but is that settling? Should I always push myself? I agree, maybe I need to stop looking at the number now, I'll redo my measurements and I'll work at strengthening my core, and strengthening my mind.
No weights needed, and really you don't need a whole lot of space. Use your body weight. Squats, wall sits, c-sits, etc. You have all the weight you need and you take it with you wherever you go.
Spend some time with a trainer - or pick up something like Insanity - and learn how to use your body to train. Extremely effective. Just make sure and watch your form so you stay healthy. Form is everything.
Extra special bonus - exercise, especially hard exercise, is a real confidence-builder and attitude adjuster. You'll be blown away at what it does for you.0 -
Goals are just that goals. Losing weight is just one factor in getting to a healthier place. Rounding out cardio (however you get cardio) with how you build muscle (whether it be in the gym, ballet barre, pilates , yoga or whatever) is how I am getting happier with my body. I will take my lower weight any day to work with ...
I will say I am amazed at how even at age 55 how my body continues to improve with monitoring my food and exercising more. I wear a Nike fit band to measure all my activity and it is amazing how little exercise beyond walking/running it takes to see continuous improvement in my body... and energy level.
Also - don't neglect sleep... we need sleep !0 -
Its really hard for our minds to catch up with our bodies. I think sometimes we have this fantasy of having that 20 year old body we once had. I readjusted my goal weight once I hit it, twice. I was 180 this past April. I am now 123. My original goal weight was 130 then 125. Now its 115 with more of a focus on staying healthy and toning. I noticed some stretch marks on my thighs a few weeks ago and was upset. Had to accept the fact that at 43 and a major weight lose causes these things to happen. Weightlifting and running makes me FEEL good so I will continue . This one should make you laugh. Looking at pictures I notice that my head seems to big for my body now! Its kind of funny and no one else seems to notice it! LOL. Maybe time for a new hairstyle? Anyhow,my goal has always been to get into a bikini and even though I could probably wear one now my focus is now toning those muscles so my abs rock. I also think that when we start this we just want to get down to an acceptable weight and then once we hit that we realize are actual potential and have confidence in ourselves to push further. Nothing wrong with that. I strongly suggest Jillian Michaels videos since you don't like the gym. She adds weights to her workouts and it gives you the full benefit of cardio and weightlifting (HITT) If I can do these anyone can, lol. Good luck and push yourself to a weight YOU feel comfortable with but don't take it to far! Check out what your BMI should be, (which i am sure you have) and accept that. Have a good day!0
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Two things immediately come to mind:
1) Your weight, and the distribution of that weight are two different things.
When I started my journey, I was a good weight - it just wasn't located in the areas I wanted it (too much, in the gut, not enough in the biceps, pecs, etc). It became necessary to be on a "maintain this weight, but tone/build" program.
2) We're creatures of habit.
You've had a habit of not liking what you see, and a habit of a certain type of workout. It might have taken years to "cement" those habits. Now it's hard to break the habit - in fact, it can take 6 weeks to actually break a habit.0 -
All the advice you have received is excellent. I just wanted to recommend a free app full of a variety of different types of exercises, both cardio and strength training:
Sworkit
You choose the type of workout you want, the length, and the app shows you which exercises to do and counts down the time until it switches you to another exercise. You can do these anywhere with minimal space and no equipment.
So, if you have an app-enabled device, this could be really useful to you. Best of luck!0 -
Congrats on achieving your goal weight. Just wanted to say I know how you feel. Even though I have lost alot I still see a fat person in the mirror most of the time. I know I will always have a problem with this. What helps me is if I go by how my clothes fit & not what I see in the mirror. Good luck & hang in there!!0
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Thank you everyone for your support.
*sigh* weight training. I just can't seem to wrap my head around it.
1. I can't afford a gym membership right now.
2. tiny little house, so no place to put a home gym
3. the above two are my favorite excuses to use to deflect the fact that I don't like the idea of weight training!
I have 2lbs and 5lbs weights at home that I use irregularity...yes I know that won't cut it. I was thinking about Pilates or yoga in the new year.
I guess it's more about learning not to compare myself to other thinner people and learning to be happy with who I am...but is that settling? Should I always push myself? I agree, maybe I need to stop looking at the number now, I'll redo my measurements and I'll work at strengthening my core, and strengthening my mind.
Start with Body Weight exercises. Look into books/websites like You Are Your Own gym! Convict Training. After a couple weeks of that, I added wearing a backpack full of college text books to doing the body weight stuff. (I lift weights now, the weight bench is on my front porch, but it,s cold now and the shed is finally finished, so I can put it in the garage now... No basement here)0 -
I've been using You Are Your Own Gym, too. Great app. I'll just do a little something whenever I find myself sitting around watching the kids, tv or whatever. It adds some variation to doing garden variety push-ups, squats, etc.0
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First congratulations!!! Second I feel ya. lol.
I readjusted my goal 3 or 4 times before settling. I lost 80lbs in all so i think the first 40 was a matter of belief. my goal back then seemed almost unreachable. once i did reach it i knew i could keep going so i did.
Anyway loose skin sucks, i know!!! Some of mine may never go 100% away but yes definitely weight train, it will help a lot!! body weight counts & is free0 -
Thank you everyone for your support.
*sigh* weight training. I just can't seem to wrap my head around it.
1. I can't afford a gym membership right now.
2. tiny little house, so no place to put a home gym
3. the above two are my favorite excuses to use to deflect the fact that I don't like the idea of weight training!
I have 2lbs and 5lbs weights at home that I use irregularity...yes I know that won't cut it. I was thinking about Pilates or yoga in the new year.
I guess it's more about learning not to compare myself to other thinner people and learning to be happy with who I am...but is that settling? Should I always push myself? I agree, maybe I need to stop looking at the number now, I'll redo my measurements and I'll work at strengthening my core, and strengthening my mind.0 -
Thank you everyone for your support.
*sigh* weight training. I just can't seem to wrap my head around it.
1. I can't afford a gym membership right now.
2. tiny little house, so no place to put a home gym
3. the above two are my favorite excuses to use to deflect the fact that I don't like the idea of weight training!
I have 2lbs and 5lbs weights at home that I use irregularity...yes I know that won't cut it. I was thinking about Pilates or yoga in the new year.
I guess it's more about learning not to compare myself to other thinner people and learning to be happy with who I am...but is that settling? Should I always push myself? I agree, maybe I need to stop looking at the number now, I'll redo my measurements and I'll work at strengthening my core, and strengthening my mind.
I have some suggestions for you, because I can't afford a gym either . I'm doing smarter science of slim exercises - 1 session of 10 minutes a week.
I use 2x 3L milk bottles filled with water for my weights for resistance training, I tie both bottles together. use one arm only to lower them very slowly (hurts a tonne!). - repeat 6 times on each arm, lowering for 10 seconds each time. You'll be feeling the burn!
for leg exercises - sit in a chair, and have another in front of you arms length away. Stand up, on one leg, support yourself (using the chair in front) - and lower yourself slowly for 10 seconds on one leg. Do that 6 times on each leg. Ow!! Alot of ow
Next get in position as if you're doing a mans push up - but lower yourself very slowly for 10 seconds. 6 times again.
Then it's suggested you use a chin up bar, and lower yourself slowly with that. but I don't have a chin up bar. So I made up my own "thing" instead.
I'm usually too sore to do any more training for a week. If you're not sore, then get more milk bottles!
I do one session of cardio a week - HIIT training for 10 minutes with a skipping rope. Skip for 30 seconds, then a one minute break - then off you skip again for 30 seconds. Over and over for 10 minutes. I'd love to afford a stationary bike for it though.
Congratulations on reaching your goal - best of luck!0 -
There's a Jillian Michael's video called something about a 20 minute workout. It's got some GREAT, hard as all get out, strength moves. You only need one set of weights (I used 10 and did as many as I could then stopped, but I got stronger to where I could do all reps with 10). Most exercises are done with body weight.
You might also check out some fitness magazines from your library (Shape, Women's Health, Fitness) or look online. Many moves just require your body weight, ex. planks, sit ups, push ups, oblique sit ups, squats, lunges.
I am amazed at how quickly strength training changes the shape of my body. Give it a try for 8 weeks, and take before, middle, and after pictures from the front and side (just wear tight clothes, no bikini needed!). See how much it sculpts your body.
Also, setting new fitness goals really helped me after each pregnancy/weight loss, ex. run a 5K, run a 10K, learn to ice-skate, be able to do a higher level on the Jillian Michael's video, etc.
One more thing, (I'm being so bossy aren't I? ) my library had these Biggest Loser books. One of them maybe the one about "success secrets" talked about ideas for maintenance goals. They had some great ideas. Maybe spend some time researching, thinking about and setting a maintenance goal, just like you did your weight loss goals.
I can tell you after losing the weight once, then 3 x with each pregnancy, the work of maintenance is worth it! It's worth it to strengthen those healthy habits that keep you so much healthier and happier for life!~ You can do it! Happy Thanksgiving!0 -
Congratulations on reaching goal!!!!! I think you have been given a lot of great advice, especially the ideas on using resistance bands and your own body weight. I realized recently that toning muscles was going to have as big an impact as weight loss on how my body looked. Believe me I am taking note of all the good ideas in this post!
Again, congratulations on your accomplishment and best wishes on this next phase of your journey!!!!!!:drinker:0 -
Great work on the weight loss I do strength training with minimal weights I really only incorporate them into lunges and squat presses. I do most of my workouts in the local park in the early mornings. I have to say at first I was a little bit embarrassed when people walked/drove past but now I have gotten to the stage of not caring. I have even had a few kids come up and watch me and ask me what I am doing lol. This is a list of some of the things I do in a strength session:
I usually do around 13-16 of them in a session.
I start with a 5-10 minutes warm up jog and then fully stretch.
All are 3 Sets x 15 Reps (8-10 exercises from this list)
Push Ups - Knees (Toes if you can)
Squats
One arm Towel Pulls (I put a towl around a tree, my feet together close to the base of the tree and then lower myself back until my arm in straight and then pull myself up). 15 reps each side
Single Leg Hip Raises (with 1 leg on park bench and 1 in the air) 15 reps each side
Lunges 15 each side
Squat Press (3kg weights each hand)
Calf Raises - 1 Leg (I use the edge of the gutter for this)
Push Ups - Bench Clap (I use the back of the park bench for this one.)
Lunges - Backward 15 each side
Walking push-ups - knees (toes if you can)
Sumo Squats (pulses)
Wall Slides
Step ups 15 each side (I use a park bench for this one)
One leg Tricep Dips (I use the park bench again for this one with one leg extended out in front of me) 15 each side
Clams (holding each one for 3 seconds)
Squat jumps
Basketball Jumps
All are 2 Sets x 30 Reps (2-4 exercises from this list)
Inner Thigh Raise
Outer Thigh Raise
Mountain Climbers
Burpees (do as many as you can. When I started I could only do 5-10 burpees before I felt like my legs were going to fall off so that is the reps I started with)
Walking lunges
3 sets x 15 reps (2 from this list)
Crunch
Reverse Crunch
Double leg lift
Double crunch
2 sets x 60 seconds (1 from this list)
Side Plank (60 sec each side)
Plank
Then I finish off with some more stretching. In total it usually takes me around 1hr 15 min. I do this 2-3 times a week. The other days I do some form of cardio and rest on a Sunday.
I'm not saying go out and do that but you could make yourself a shorter workout doing some of those and build from there. I never thought I would enjoy it but I have come to love it.0
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