What would push you to divorce?

MuscleAndMascara
MuscleAndMascara Posts: 1,260 Member
in Chit-Chat
A lot of people, from what I've seen, would automatically divorce because of a cheating spouse. Understandable, but what other things would you "call quits" for?
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Replies

  • meshashesha2012
    meshashesha2012 Posts: 8,329 Member
    if i found out my pouse were leading some sort of serial killer/master criminal double life
  • Madame_Goldbricker
    Madame_Goldbricker Posts: 1,625 Member
    Being married would tip me over the edge.
  • vtmoon
    vtmoon Posts: 3,436 Member
    Abuse of you or children.
  • princesstoadstool82
    princesstoadstool82 Posts: 371 Member
    I have... for me it was lack of love lack of emotional support lack of phyical contact... we ended up being house mates... not husband and wife... after a year (4 in total) of trying to change it, being uphappy, we agreed to call it quits.
    He knew exactly what I needed as I would sit in front of him explaining, but nothing ever changed. It was the hardest emotional thing I have ever had to do.
    He was a good provider, never nasty , I just couldnt do it for another 4 years, let a lone 30 years...

    But theres a good ending he is free to find someone that he cant keep his hands off... and me, I already found someone who loves to touch me, who I never have to ask if I look good or if he loves me.. I never have to ask to be held.... for me this is love..


    So for me thats why I divorced. .. I all I could to make it better, but in the end I had to leave.
  • BlueBombers
    BlueBombers Posts: 4,064 Member
    Abuse of you or children.

    ^ this
  • xcmtnracer
    xcmtnracer Posts: 426 Member
    Not being happy would do it, I'd rather be alone for life than miserable. I'm not for divorce at all but if I had to choose between letting go of my 20 years of marriage being unhappy over 40 more years of happiness elsewhere I'd go elsewhere.
  • nicolebarbiex
    nicolebarbiex Posts: 6
    if I found out that my husband was a serial killer or pedophile. that would be disheartening for the relationship to say the least lol x
  • brower47
    brower47 Posts: 16,356 Member
    If I found out he liked avacados. He's told me tons of times he doesn't like them.

    Will-Ferrell-Elf-You-Sit-on-a-Throne-of-Lies_zpse54a15db.gif
  • nicolebarbiex
    nicolebarbiex Posts: 6
    If I found out he liked avacados. He's told me tons of times he doesn't like them.

    Will-Ferrell-Elf-You-Sit-on-a-Throne-of-Lies_zpse54a15db.gif

    I laughed way too much at this. thank you hahaha x
  • xombiebite
    xombiebite Posts: 276 Member
    - abuse in any form towards me, our potential children or animals
    - alcoholism, drug abuse or gambling addiction that was seriously deteriorating our family (and I'm talking about after getting help and the relapses keep happening)


    i think thats about it
  • richardheath
    richardheath Posts: 1,276 Member
    It wasn't the cheating that did it for me. It was the fact that she couldn't stay away from him when we were supposedly working it out.
  • ldrosophila
    ldrosophila Posts: 7,512 Member
    options
  • meshashesha2012
    meshashesha2012 Posts: 8,329 Member
    Abuse of you or children.
    that would lead to well planned murder for me
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  • ninerbuff
    ninerbuff Posts: 48,994 Member
    Disavowing being a 49er fan. For reals.

    A.C.E. Certified Personal/Group FitnessTrainer
    IDEA Fitness member
    Kickboxing Certified Instructor
    Been in fitness for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition
  • MuscleAndMascara
    MuscleAndMascara Posts: 1,260 Member
    What about selfishness, addiction to videos games and lack of emotion or communication? One who will have his mother watch his one year old daughter so he can play his video game first thing when he gets home till he falls asleep.. doesn't pick up after himself. Takes his wife for granted working a full time job, coming home to be mommy and house wife at the same time? One who can't buy a simple card for his wife on her birth day when the month before his wife bought him a 800$ tool he isn't using because of a video game. One who snaps at his wife for tryin to go to bed for work in the am, asking to get off the game. So his wife sleeps in another room. One who say he knows he has things to work on but does nothing? One who is 30 years old and has do much potential but choses to throw it away? Or a spouse that has had good conversations with you on positive Change who doesn't even bother to nag anymore?

    I'm just curious... would this be a cause or am I the selfish one?
  • MuscleAndMascara
    MuscleAndMascara Posts: 1,260 Member
    Abuse of you or children.

    ^ this


    For sure!! I would kill him..
  • MyChocolateDiet
    MyChocolateDiet Posts: 22,281 Member
    beating or cheating. it's simple and it rhymes. it should be taught in kindergarten...because by the time ppl reach the age of dating hormones have gotten all over the place and teaching is no longer valid.
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  • princesstoadstool82
    princesstoadstool82 Posts: 371 Member
    If thats you... id talk to him about it.. everything you said here... if he doesnt change... then thats your choice. Good luck. And no your not selfish. He sounds like a spoilt brat. Marriage is a partnership. He needs to lift his game... or he will be alone with is games.
  • 100toloose
    100toloose Posts: 151 Member
    @Tboscamp- not selfish,go for it Hon! There is a prince out there ,waiting for you!
  • meshashesha2012
    meshashesha2012 Posts: 8,329 Member
    What about selfishness, addiction to videos games and lack of emotion or communication? One who will have his mother watch his one year old daughter so he can play his video game first thing when he gets home till he falls asleep.. doesn't pick up after himself. Takes his wife for granted working a full time job, coming home to be mommy and house wife at the same time? One who can't buy a simple card for his wife on her birth day when the month before his wife bought him a 800$ tool he isn't using because of a video game. One who snaps at his wife for tryin to go to bed for work in the am, asking to get off the game. So his wife sleeps in another room. One who say he knows he has things to work on but does nothing? One who is 30 years old and has do much potential but choses to throw it away? Or a spouse that has had hood conversations with you on positive Change who doesn't even bother to nag anymore?

    I'm just curious... would this be a cause or am I the selfish one?

    but isnt that the kind of stuff you find out before you get married?
    communication issues dont miraculously resolve themselves because of a piece of paper and expecting to people change after marriage never works out.

    IMO, if the person isn't someone you'd want to spend the rest of your life with as they are before the marriage then there shouldnt be a wedding
  • MuscleAndMascara
    MuscleAndMascara Posts: 1,260 Member
    What about selfishness, addiction to videos games and lack of emotion or communication? One who will have his mother watch his one year old daughter so he can play his video game first thing when he gets home till he falls asleep.. doesn't pick up after himself. Takes his wife for granted working a full time job, coming home to be mommy and house wife at the same time? One who can't buy a simple card for his wife on her birth day when the month before his wife bought him a 800$ tool he isn't using because of a video game. One who snaps at his wife for tryin to go to bed for work in the am, asking to get off the game. So his wife sleeps in another room. One who say he knows he has things to work on but does nothing? One who is 30 years old and has do much potential but choses to throw it away? Or a spouse that has had hood conversations with you on positive Change who doesn't even bother to nag anymore?

    I'm just curious... would this be a cause or am I the selfish one?

    but isnt that the kind of stuff you find out before you get married?
    communication issues dont miraculously resolve themselves because of a piece of paper and expecting to people change after marriage never works out.

    IMO, if the person isn't someone you'd want to spend the rest of your life with as they are before the marriage then there shouldnt be a wedding


    He is not the person I married.
  • tworthen79
    tworthen79 Posts: 1,173 Member
    Abuse of my children/myself.
    Rape
  • The_Enginerd
    The_Enginerd Posts: 3,982 Member
    What about selfishness, addiction to videos games and lack of emotion or communication? One who will have his mother watch his one year old daughter so he can play his video game first thing when he gets home till he falls asleep.. doesn't pick up after himself. Takes his wife for granted working a full time job, coming home to be mommy and house wife at the same time? One who can't buy a simple card for his wife on her birth day when the month before his wife bought him a 800$ tool he isn't using because of a video game. One who snaps at his wife for tryin to go to bed for work in the am, asking to get off the game. So his wife sleeps in another room. One who say he knows he has things to work on but does nothing? One who is 30 years old and has do much potential but choses to throw it away? Or a spouse that has had good conversations with you on positive Change who doesn't even bother to nag anymore?

    I'm just curious... would this be a cause or am I the selfish one?
    You must be a glutton for punishment. This is far from the first rant I've seen about him.
  • jofjltncb6
    jofjltncb6 Posts: 34,415 Member
    What about selfishness, addiction to videos games and lack of emotion or communication? One who will have his mother watch his one year old daughter so he can play his video game first thing when he gets home till he falls asleep.. doesn't pick up after himself. Takes his wife for granted working a full time job, coming home to be mommy and house wife at the same time? One who can't buy a simple card for his wife on her birth day when the month before his wife bought him a 800$ tool he isn't using because of a video game. One who snaps at his wife for tryin to go to bed for work in the am, asking to get off the game. So his wife sleeps in another room. One who say he knows he has things to work on but does nothing? One who is 30 years old and has do much potential but choses to throw it away? Or a spouse that has had good conversations with you on positive Change who doesn't even bother to nag anymore?

    I'm just curious... would this be a cause or am I the selfish one?
    You must be a glutton for punishment. This is far from the first rant I've seen about him.

    #$%^! I told myself I wasn't going to tag this thread...

    ...but this looks like potential MFP forum gold...

    ...so I'm in...

    ...reluctantly, but still in.
  • lakkazit
    lakkazit Posts: 4
    You are definitely not selfish . Iam going through same situation where i can't find any emotional support from my Husband. I can't take his negligence anymore and i sort of left my country on education basis.
  • tworthen79
    tworthen79 Posts: 1,173 Member
    I believe some of these issues aren't present before one gets married. Some people develop addictions after the fact, they cheat, they become selfish and abusive. Not everything is foreseen before you say "I do".

    People change! And btw........I would consider all that you said to be a reason. But that's just my opinion.
  • SonicDeathMonkey80
    SonicDeathMonkey80 Posts: 4,489 Member
    Marriage, duh
  • DebbieLyn63
    DebbieLyn63 Posts: 2,654 Member
    What about selfishness, addiction to videos games and lack of emotion or communication? One who will have his mother watch his one year old daughter so he can play his video game first thing when he gets home till he falls asleep.. doesn't pick up after himself. Takes his wife for granted working a full time job, coming home to be mommy and house wife at the same time? One who can't buy a simple card for his wife on her birth day when the month before his wife bought him a 800$ tool he isn't using because of a video game. One who snaps at his wife for tryin to go to bed for work in the am, asking to get off the game. So his wife sleeps in another room. One who say he knows he has things to work on but does nothing? One who is 30 years old and has do much potential but choses to throw it away? Or a spouse that has had good conversations with you on positive Change who doesn't even bother to nag anymore?

    I'm just curious... would this be a cause or am I the selfish one?

    That would definitely do it for me! And you are not alone in this situation. I know other young wives facing the same crap. Way past time for him to grow up.

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