Lose 5 pounds a month November 2010 CHALLENGE

Kelly, not really selfish, you need more time to work out...I guess she wasn't for adding more time to her workout??? It is hard when you go to the gym with a friend because you are not always on the same page with what you wish to accomplish....maybe she will come around...

dmgaloha--reguarding the daycare situation....my son didn't go until he was 4 and he only went to attend the preschool there and he did fine at age 4....now my daughter was always the unsettled one and in the beggining I would send her with a blanket or shirt that I had slept with ( I know it sounds crazy but they say the smell calms them)....anyway that was over a year ago and now my daughter is pretty well adjusted at age 3, I just give her hugs and kisses then blow kisses goodbye (though she is a little clingy when we first arrive)...but hopefully it will get easier for you.....sending your strength (and usually when I sneak a peak back at her, she is off having fun with her friends)..:flowerforyou:

dmg Altho i never have had my kids in a daycare I havehad\ my family watch them and my son around a year old would do that same thing. he would cry sooo hard and when i left i was pretty stressed wondering how he was doing and after a few times of that i couldnt' handle it anymore and i would call about five minutes after i left and 99 percent of the time he was already playing and having fun. he cried like that from about 9 months untill about 2 years and still does rarely if i leave him with a friend ....He is 3 years old.

I really found that calling to find that he was already calmed down calmed my nerves pretty good. I always knew because my family had told me before that he was always fine after about five to ten minutes but it just helped to call ........

I wonder if the daycare would let you do that?

Today isn't my normal weigh-in day but I wanted to share my joyous moment on the scale this morning with everyone. I have been aiming to get into the 140's before my brother gets here (on Monday,) and I weighed 150 this morning! I am soooooooo close, and I just cannot believe that I am really doing this.

I have officially lost 25 lbs, and I have 20 more to go. I am more than halfway there! I just can't believe it. Thanks to all of you for the support you have given me along the way!

Good morning ladies. Ok, well, not so good morning, but that 's why I'm here. I need HELP!! The school / daycare drop-off thing is driving me so crazy that I am nearly in tears on my way to work. My 2 year old cries EVERY morning and I'm ready to pull out my hair (ok really, I'm ready to stuff my face with bad foods). And I'm not talking a sad boo-hoo feel-sorry-for-me kind of cry, this is a mad scream throw-herself-on-the-ground or daycare-worker-has-to-restrain-her kind of cry. Does anyone have any ideas on how to get her to stop, or on how to cope? I know it only lasts 30 seconds for her, but the effect it has on me lingers for hours!! I am actually thrilled that I am away for work overnight on Wed night, so I am not doing the drop-off on Thurs morning - how pathetic is that?!

Off to fill up my water, mix my protein powder into my rice milk and pray for serenity.

I currently work in a preschool of 3-5 yr olds. Something that we have for those children that have trouble seeing parents leave is a picture wall of all the families. If the kids get a little sad and missing mom/dad, we can go over and take a look a the picture....sometimes we even help the kids write a letter to the parents. Can she take a family picture with her to school to have to look at when she needs it? Also, have you tried the book "The Kissing Hand"? It is a book about a young raccoon who is afraid of going to school for the first time. His mom kisses the inside of his hand and then closes the fingers over it so that he will have the kiss when ever he needs it. Some kids can make a connection with the character when you kiss their hand. Do you go inside to drop her off or is there a drop off line? If you go in, a lot of our parents will take the child around the room to check out the activities for the day, help them get started, then do a final hug/kiss/goodbye. Don't ask her if it is okay to leave, just say "It's time for me to go", give hugs/kisses and leave. The big thing is developing a drop off routine that you stick to, which is soothing to the child...kids thrive on routine. Good Luck!!!!

Follow your motherly feelings...
I had a daycare (many moons ago) where my daughter cried and begged me not to go. She was there for three weeks and I just didn't get a great feeling. Once the school I work out closed early I went to pick her up early without calling first, no one came to the door for a long time. Finally when she did come to the door (looking like she had been sleeping) she tried to not let me in saying "I'll go get her, wait here" ummm... NOPE! Pushed my way in and my daughter was in the back room in a play pin she was way to big for, wet diaper, crying, and no room to move. I was so mad! We left and never went back. Not trying to scare you, but if she is not happy you might want to just show up and see how things are when mom is not expected. Some times kids just want mom and stop crying after a few minutes, but it is worth checking into IMO.

I've been a little tormented by 55tolose's post, so thanks Jenn for saying what you did. 55tolose, this is one of those training moments of Motherhood to listen to your own voice. If what I or others say to you doesn't resonate then keep listening to your child and searching yourself.

Sometimes kids are manipulative and we need to not get sucked in Sometimes they are working through a painful but necessary developmental step and we need to support and guide them forward. Sometimes they are genuinely suffering and trying to express something that they do not have the words for and we need to hear them and speak for them.

You'll regret some of your choices in hindsight - guaranteed. For me personally though, the choices I made when I didn't listen to my child are more painful today than the choices I made when I didn't listen to family, friends and experts.

Jenn offered good advice - to arrive unannounced. And maybe it's just not a good fit - it could be something as innocuous as there's a dog next door who barks alot - know what I mean? Adjusting to the bigger world is a process we must all go through and you will do your child no harm in being thoughtful about how that happens. If this is not the right situation, you will find other options.

Good luck.

SW: 184.5
CW: 181.5

Jennplus... I love your story. Good for you!

Nov 1st 201.6
Nov 5th 199.8
Nov 12th 199.2
Nov 19th 197.6
Nov 26th
Nov 30th

I'm at 4 lbs!! I might actually hit the 5lb goal this month!! I haven't done that in months!! Woot Woot!! LOL! Hope you all have a great weekend!! TGIF!!


Bru

Hi there, I'm back. Been out of touch for a month or more. Lost my focus and feeling sluggish. I thought I could stay for accountable to myself without logging in my food or reading up on the community. Boy was I wrong. I need that outside influence. We are leaving for our kids' house for Thanksgiving after the storms have come through and roads cleared. I'm hoping we can leave Sunday or Monday.
Well, anyway, I'm back and need some encouragement here. I haven't even gotten on the scale. I don't think I could face it. right now. I don't think I 've gained much cause my new size still fits...I just feel sluggish.
Jacque

shorthand - I also have a hard time tracking my food. If I've eaten over, then I get discouraged and want to quit. I'm trying a strategy that doesn't involve tracking my food: going sugar-free. It's only been a few days, but it's working well for me so far. I guess you need to find what will work for you.

Terri - try to keep eating healthy, and you should do ok over your busy-season.

Kelly - I don't think you're being selfish. I would just tell her when you're going and when you're coming back, and if she wants a drive with you, she can either work out extra like you, or bring a book while she's waiting. Oh... I just saw your next post, and that is exactly what you did! So, yay! I totally support you! That's exactly what I would have done.

Bru - congrats on your weight loss!! Stay strong over Thanksgiving! You're almost there!

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WOW! I had no idea that I would start such a huge discussion about my daughter's trantrum's for daycare drop-off. You guys are such an amazing group of friends. I feel so supported and loved. Thank you! And here are all my comments / responses:

Michele - thanks for your post about the drop-off routine. I will definitely look for that book - it sounds sweet! We do go inside for drop-off, and the room does have a place for family pics - I guess I just need to bring one in! I don't think she misses me *after* I'm gone - she just doesn't want me to leave. It's almost like her "routine" just includes crying right now, whether she actually is upset or not. I've had a few days off, so I'm hoping to start next week on the right foot.

Tina - thanks for your support on the drop-off too. She usually sleeps with a blankie, and I have been thinking of giving her one in the morning as a trade-off when I leave. However, where I have a 5 year old who is still addicted to her blankie, I'm also afraid to encourage her dependence on it.

Amanda - that is exactly what I was thinking last week: that I would need to send my hubby, because I wasn't sure how much more of it I could take. I think that typically a mother's heart is broken so much easier than a father's. [PS. CONGRATS on your loss!! I know you will see the 140's VERY soon!!]

55 - I remember my first daughter was typically very good about dropping her off, but if she was ever crying for any reason, my cell phone would ring before I had even arrived at work, and it was my daycare provider just letting me know that she was fine. The daycare lady had gone through a tough time with her son, and knew what it was like! There are days with Kara where I hang out in the hall, and wait until she stops crying. I don't think the daycare would mind me calling, but it's almost like I feel silly because I know it only lasts a minute.

Jenn, thanks for expressing your concern, but I do know she is in a safe and fun environment. It is a regulated public daycare, with tons of amazing staff and very strict rules and guidelines. I have come in at various times and she is always playing and never, ever crying. When we're home, she's excited to go and even asks about her teachers on the weekend. I really do appreciate your concern - it's a valid and smart question, and one I would ask as well! That is terrible that you had that happen to your child - you did the right thing!

Karin - thanks for echoing Jenn's concern. I think it is more of a developmental / manipulative thing in her case. Bedtime is a similar freak-out. (And on most days, bedtime completely stresses me out as well! Typically that is my biggest over-eating temptation of the day! Just to prove my point, I should have put her down for her nap an hour ago, but I am procrastinating because I hate to make her cry...) I also try to be understanding, as she is attending a french daycare but we speak mainly english at home, so I'm sure there is a bit of a language discomfort for her as well. I have talked to her teachers and they are willing to translate anything she doesn't seem to understand, and I gave them a 'translation guide' so they would understand what she was asking for (for example, 'nack' = snack, etc).

Just-Peachy - oh my, your son really played you, didn't he? How did you get him to stop? Maybe I am over-reacting?! Kara is not as bad as some of the stories that have been shared - it's not like she doesn't want to stay - it's more like she wants me to stay with her.

Thanks again for everyone's support. I'll let you know how it goes next week.

evening all, not alot of time to respond to everyone individually, I just want to say how great it is we all jump to help someone out (daycare stories) we are all a caring bunch here...I am sooo thankful for you all...:flowerforyou: ....so glad everyone seems for the most part to be doing great with either maintaining or loosing lbs...everyone keep up the great work. and I hope you all enjoy the weekend....good night!!:bigsmile: