Dieting According to Your Star Sign
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"Best bet: Aquarius rules the ankles and circulatory system, which is why skiing, treadmilling, and dancing are excellent calorie burners for you."
Uh-uh, nope. I have Ehlers-Danlos Syndrome. I can't do a single one of these. Also, I have complications of EDS like Reynaud's (which means my circulation isn't so great), dysautonomia, and hypotension.0 -
Cancer (June 22-July 22)
Cancers are emotional eaters, before bedtime snackers, and inveterate food hoarders.
If you're gonna call me names, at least pick appropriate ones, like "hoochie" or "biotch"0 -
Cancer (June 22-July 22)
Cancers are emotional eaters, before bedtime snackers, and inveterate food hoarders.
If you're gonna call me names, at least pick appropriate ones, like "hoochie" or "biotch"
I'm too sexy for my sign picture, so I refuse to read it. If the stars don't even know how sexy I am, I just don't know what to say0 -
Best bet: Appeal to your own vanity by joining a gym, where you can work out in full view of the minions and fantasize ad nauseam about how dazzling you'll look once you've dropped a few pounds.
Haha!! Loved it!0 -
Sagittarius (November 22-December 21)
Prone to claustrophobia, you require freedom, challenge, and open spaces filled with gaily chirping birds. You also tend to put on weight easily, particularly in the hips and thighs.
Best bet: Go hiking rather than sequestering yourself inside a gym. As for dieting, don't even think about it. Just try to eat for health and lead a vigorous, don't-fence-me-in life.
Eat: Whole grains, whole-grain cereals, pears, apples, oranges, strawberries, root vegetables (e.g., potatoes, carrots, and radishes), onions, olives, figs, and garlic
Avoid: Spicy food, sweets, refined sugar, and alcohol
I am claustrophobic, never knew that it was a Sagittarius thing. I also gain my weight in my hips and thighs. So that was kinda interesting!
BUT I hate hiking... I like to sit under a nice tree and read a book. I love all the "Eats" and sorry, can't live without the "Avoids." You just try to take away my spicy food!0 -
I should workout in full view of my minions lol...and give up spicy foods and dairy? Ha ha I think not0
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Obviously this isn't accurate. I'm a Pisces and everything repulses me. :happy:0
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Virgo (August 23-September 22)
Practically everything on the planet repulses you, or just plain gives you the shivers (you're the kids who'll eat only beige food one month, organic chimichangas the next), and you're maddeningly (to some) hypersensitive about dietary matters.
Best bet: Vegetarianism, or any fringe diet and fitness program that's pragmatic, detailed, purifying, and ferociously organized.
Eat: Whole grains and cereals, oats, fruit salads, fruit juices, lemon juice, bananas, oranges, leafy greens, vegetables with spices, sprouts, soups, teas, and almonds
Avoid: Rich and heavy foods, and chocolate
WTF?! No. This is soooo completely not me. And you better be prepared to die taking away my chocolate.0 -
Cancer (June 22-July 22)
Cancers are emotional eaters, before bedtime snackers, and inveterate food hoarders.
If you're gonna call me names, at least pick appropriate ones, like "hoochie" or "biotch"
I'm too sexy for my sign picture, so I refuse to read it. If the stars don't even know how sexy I am, I just don't know what to say
I'm all for new star signs to reflect us sexy MFP beasts. I'll get to work on that... :bigsmile:0 -
Cancer (June 22-July 22)
Cancers are emotional eaters, before bedtime snackers, and inveterate food hoarders.
If you're gonna call me names, at least pick appropriate ones, like "hoochie" or "biotch"
I'm too sexy for my sign picture, so I refuse to read it. If the stars don't even know how sexy I am, I just don't know what to say
I'm all for new star signs to reflect us sexy MFP beasts. I'll get to work on that... :bigsmile:
Throwing in my hat to pose for Scorpio. Lol0 -
Virgo (August 23-September 22)
Practically everything on the planet repulses you, or just plain gives you the shivers (you're the kids who'll eat only beige food one month, organic chimichangas the next), and you're maddeningly (to some) hypersensitive about dietary matters.
Best bet: Vegetarianism, or any fringe diet and fitness program that's pragmatic, detailed, purifying, and ferociously organized.
Eat: Whole grains and cereals, oats, fruit salads, fruit juices, lemon juice, bananas, oranges, leafy greens, vegetables with spices, sprouts, soups, teas, and almonds
Avoid: Rich and heavy foods, and chocolate
WTF?! No. This is soooo completely not me. And you better be prepared to die taking away my chocolate.
Nooooo you're not at all hypersensitive.
(just kidding, don't hurt me)0 -
Cancer (June 22-July 22)
Cancers are emotional eaters, before bedtime snackers, and inveterate food hoarders.
If you're gonna call me names, at least pick appropriate ones, like "hoochie" or "biotch"
I'm too sexy for my sign picture, so I refuse to read it. If the stars don't even know how sexy I am, I just don't know what to say
I'm all for new star signs to reflect us sexy MFP beasts. I'll get to work on that... :bigsmile:
Throwing in my hat to pose for Scorpio. Lol
New Scorpio... Check. :drinker:0 -
I was ok with my Virgo plan until it said avoid chocolate.0
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Taurus: "You'll cheerfully and steadfastly stick to a fitness routine if it's predictable, slightly boring, and shows practical."
LOL because this is actually so accurate for me. Same with food. Predictable & boring - I figure out what I like & can eat it everyday for weeks on end.
Edited to add that this is pretty accurate too: "No sign is more blockheadedly sedentary or accumulates pounds faster." YUP, that's me!0 -
Bump so more people can benefit from this amazing diet plan.0
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Cancer (June 22-July 22)
Cancers are emotional eaters, before bedtime snackers, and inveterate food hoarders.
If you're gonna call me names, at least pick appropriate ones, like "hoochie" or "biotch"
I'm too sexy for my sign picture, so I refuse to read it. If the stars don't even know how sexy I am, I just don't know what to say
I'm all for new star signs to reflect us sexy MFP beasts. I'll get to work on that... :bigsmile:
Throwing in my hat to pose for Scorpio. Lol
Hey, if we're making a Horoscope calendar, I'll be Libra.
But we can modify it a bit, yes?0 -
I'm an Aries, and I'm supposed to avoid spicy food and alcohol? DAFUQ???
I practically live off those two items.
Exactly. This Aries says NO.0 -
ummm...what was I saying? Oh yeah. As a Gemini, I must agree with pretty much everything but the foods I should avoid. Those are my favorite food groups.
Edit: I forgot something. What about chocolate? It isn't listed anywhere under my sign. It's another one of my favorite food groups.0 -
I thought this was great. As a Gemini you nailed what I like the most in foods both good and bad and it has always been better to eat multiple small meals. I don't know if I'll follow the advice and too bad some people had to get a little rude about it - it's only a blog for crying out loud! Nobody said it was a law you had to follow. Maybe they are afraid the astrological food police will show up at their door. LOL Take it with a grain a salt like every other diet plan on MFP. AND don't forget to exercise within your physical capabilities to get your body stronger and use up calories.0
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This is MY kinda work out! Woot!0
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