your worse or humiliating experience when fat?
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when my almost ex-husband told me that I don`t look like a women0
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when my almost ex-husband told me that I don`t look like a women0
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Porcelain toilet bowl in a public bathroom of a really old building broke in half after I did my business, as I was finishing up. Sent me sliding under the bathroom door in a log flume of, well, "logs" and water. Humiliating? Yeah, it was humiliating.0
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This was one of the absolutely most disgusting things anyone has ever said to me.
My Mom died suddenly, and I was at her viewing, except I new she wouldn't want me to see her so I stayed by the back door the whole time and didn't look at the casket or approach. In walks an old friend of hers and she tries making small talk with me. Of course, I am so overwhelmed with gut-wrenching sadness and couldn't follow what she was saying until she tells me how fat I am now. Here is our conversation:
Her: "You sure have gotten chunky!!"
Me: "Um? Well, uh...well hahahaha you know my twins, they totally wrecked my body but I love them!"
Her: "Oh now that's no excuse I had kids too and I'm nowhere near as fat as you!"
Me: (glances toward my mother's casket) Um...yeah...I don't know..."
Yep folks, this actually happened. I hope I NEVER see that horrible women again in my life.0 -
I usually don't have negative experiences just some here and there but tonight was heartbreaking. My boyfriend and I were at the pet store looking to buy a puppy tonight when three teenagers came into the store, one guy and two girls. They were standing kind of near us and I heard the guy whisper something which I couldn't understand at first, then one of the girl's asked "What?" and he clearly responded with a half whisper "I hate fat people".0
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This thread is crushing my faith in humanity. Added to some news stories I read earlier about Russia and whatnot, I am having a hard time believing that people can ever be good or kind unless there is something in it for them.0
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This was one of the absolutely most disgusting things anyone has ever said to me.
My Mom died suddenly, and I was at her viewing, except I new she wouldn't want me to see her so I stayed by the back door the whole time and didn't look at the casket or approach. In walks an old friend of hers and she tries making small talk with me. Of course, I am so overwhelmed with gut-wrenching sadness and couldn't follow what she was saying until she tells me how fat I am now. Here is our conversation:
Her: "You sure have gotten chunky!!"
Me: "Um? Well, uh...well hahahaha you know my twins, they totally wrecked my body but I love them!"
Her: "Oh now that's no excuse I had kids too and I'm nowhere near as fat as you!"
Me: (glances toward my mother's casket) Um...yeah...I don't know..."
Yep folks, this actually happened. I hope I NEVER see that horrible women again in my life.
I would have put that "old friend" in her own casket. Seriously, some people are completely clueless about their surroundings and what is going on. I guess it's their world and you're just living in it, huh?0 -
1. Had a guy tell me that my weight made me a practice girl, and there was no WAY he would ever date me.
2. A boy tried to push me head first into my locker during high school, and then told me I was too fat to fit.
3. My grandma on my dad's side asked if I was pregnant and when I told her no, she was delighted that I had only gotten fat and wasn't going to be a mom too.
4. "But your sister isn't big like you."
5. "But your mom is so small!"
6. Oh, and one time in high school (what a treat it was for me) some douche stole my glasses and then asked why I didn't wear them more often because then I could see how fat I was.
I'd like to blame a lot of what happened to me during high school on immaturity, but some people are just cruel. I can change my weight, but ugly comes from the inside.0 -
I would have put that "old friend" in her own casket. Seriously, some people are completely clueless about their surroundings and what is going on. I guess it's their world and you're just living in it, huh?
I'm pretty sure she is nuts0 -
.....so, so meny things..... none of which are realy worth dwelling on0
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When I was 135 and saw my old best friend. She said " Wow you are like half the person you used to be." I had only lost 15 pounds.I am 5'2" so it makes a difference, but it was not nice at all The most I weighed when we were friends was 150. We were around a bunch of people we knew, that stung. Even more so because I gained that weight and more back. She could have just said I look great or something.0
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Mine is definatly when I was on a rollercoaster ride, once id squashed in into the seat, the safety harness would not lock tight, the young female attendant could not push the bar down so they had to get the big burly male ride operator to come out from his station and push with all his might to close it, all this meaning the ride was delayed and all infront of queing passengers, when they finally did close it I could barely breath through the duration of the ride. Humiliated wasnt the word! Never again!0
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Some said - I am like a ladybug, if I fall over - I will struggle to get up...(Was pregnant, but that still sticks to me!) - I know, it is quite funny, but not If someone says it to you!0
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1. Had to go to grandparents house everyday before & after school: my nickname was "fatso" and "F-A-T". When asked how I was doing, I would respond "I'm fine!" each day, and each day it would be followed up with "Are you fine or are you fat?" I dreaded each morning being confronted with being fat.
2. Annual check-up around 8 years old my mom made me tell the doctor I was too fat. I think she felt bad after since I cried while saying it to the doctor. We went out to dinner after and she said I could have whatever I wanted. She realized her error, right? Nope, when she was yelling at me a few days or weeks later, during her angry rant (these happened often) she said "and you can go crying to the doctor all you want about being too fat..I really don't care!" (The disagreement at the time didn't involve weight, but everything I did wrong or was getting in trouble for always went back to me being fat)
Also growing up she would always call me fat and say/do other things to make me cry. When I would start crying she would say "you're fat and you're ugly. and when you cry you look more ugly!!" When she would get mad at me or if I made any type of mistake (most of them innocent), she would call me "Fat Fool"
3. Both of my sisters were very skinny growing up (not average, actual skinny) and I was overweight. When a schoolmate's mother was our cashier one day at the grocery store she asked my mom "the other two are so skinny, how come she's so fat? She's eating too much!" and winked. Of course my mom said nothing to her, but as we were leaving the store she yelled at me angrily, asking "Why would she ask that? Were you eating a lot at the school trip?" (that lady was a chaperone at a recent school trip)
4. Pictures. and not just ones at bad angles. I'd go on vacation or to a special event and be excited to see the pictures (before digital cameras), and I was always so sad and embarassed when I saw what I looked like. Especially because I usually was excited and happy at the events, wearing nice clothes and feeling great in them.
5. As a kid whenever I'd say I was hungry, usually because we weren't given proper lunches or even snacks, I'd be told "You? You're always hungry though"
There's a lot more but I won't put it all here and I'm sure I've thankfully forgotten some. I really felt hideous growing up and that no one would ever like me, either as a friend or anything more. I lost a lot of weight at 20 years old and at 21 when I was a size 2/4 and wearing XS I still felt huge. I think constantly being told that I was fat and ugly has really stuck with me. I feel like a "fat person" no matter what size or weight I am.
Now that I've learned a lot more about health and fitness, what really bothers me is that none of these comments or statements came from a place of caring or concern. They weren't concerned about my health or well-being. It's not like I can look back on these comments and think they were trying to help me. In fact, I was always ridiculed for it, put down, and/or made fun of. Nobody tried to help me or offered any help/suggestions.0 -
I've never been seriously overweight, so I can't chime in on experience. But, I just wanted to say, that as I've read these stories, I am just sickened (and often shocked) by the cruelty of people. I wish none of these incidents had ever happened. They shouldn't have. What in the world gives people they idea they can judge and treat people any less compassionately than they would want to be treated?!?! It just infuriates me!!!
I wish I could apologize on behalf of the world. It is just so wrong. And every one of you (and the others who haven't added their own stories) deserve respect, love, and compassion. All I can do is do my best to teach my children to never, ever, ever think its' ok to treat people this way- because of their weight or any other difference.
So sorry for all the pain...0 -
I needed surgery over a year ago and so my doctor sent me to have an MRI , You know the open kind? well as they slid me in it my belly just touched the top in spots so if I were to gain any more weight I don`t know what they would have done with me?? Use an elephant scanner??? I just thought to myself - OMG !! I was mortified!0
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I've never been seriously overweight, so I can't chime in on experience. But, I just wanted to say, that as I've read these stories, I am just sickened (and often shocked) by the cruelty of people. I wish none of these incidents had ever happened. They shouldn't have. What in the world gives people they idea they can judge and treat people any less compassionately than they would want to be treated?!?! It just infuriates me!!!
I wish I could apologize on behalf of the world. It is just so wrong. And every one of you (and the others who haven't added their own stories) deserve respect, love, and compassion. All I can do is do my best to teach my children to never, ever, ever think its' ok to treat people this way- because of their weight or any other difference.
So sorry for all the pain...
:drinker:0 -
Two stick in my mind.
My Aunt and Uncle drove past me walking home from work one day and pulled over to offer me a lift. My uncle says they weren't sure it was me from behind as the person "looked too big". At this point i saw my aunt knock his elbow to shut him up - subtle.
The other was when i was walking past a young slim girl and two young lads. One lad said hello, the other said "wow she's massive in comparison to you! (To the slim girl) Twice the size!"
Funnily enough it hurt my feelings but not enough for me to actually lose the weight. I lost it for me, when i was ready! Sod the other people!0 -
In my early 20's I dated this total doucher who told me, "You look good now (I was 115 lbs) but if you ever get to 130 lbs we can be friends but we won't be sleeping together."
Ugh, needless to say that relationship didn't go anywhere. I'm a lot bigger now but *I* would never give him the time of day again, much less be friends.0 -
My seat belt didn't fit on a Southwest flight. I was so terrified that I would either be singled out and humiliated by a seat belt extender or, worse, asked to pay for a second seat, that I held my purse over the buckle on the belt throughout the whole flight so that an attendant couldn't see it didn't fit. That was the LAST time a seat belt on a flight didn't fit.0
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When I first moved to Florida I did not have internet access at my place so I used to go to my mother's home and use her wifi. I was sitting in the dining area using my laptop when I heard this creaking sound. I ignored it a couple of times and then the chair fell apart and I crashed onto the floor. My stepfather said the chair was an old yard chair and they have been meaning to get more but I was so embarrassed. Did I mention that I was sitting at the table with a McDonalds bag filled with 8 cheeseburgers?0
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A few years ago, I was driving with the windows down and stopped at a stoplight when I heard something coming from the car next to me. There were two guys in their 20s in the car next to mine and they were looking at me saying "moo!!" When I instinctively looked over, they said "How's it going cow?" and mooed at me until the light changed. I was so devastated that it crushed my self esteem and made things worse for me for a while. People can be so cruel. That experience just sticks with me. So simple, but so traumatic.
What a bunch of *kitten* I'm sorry you had to go through that! People can be so ****ing mean!!! I can relate to that, every time I'm in traffic and someone wants to insult me (for driving recklessly LOL - hey sometimes it's them) their first insult is calling me fat or something related.0 -
When I started this weight loss period, a friend and I were talking and I was explaining to her my plans and goals and I told her that I intended to get down to 175, her reply was yeah and when you get there you might want to continue going! This hurt so much and till this day still hurts. I told was telling her that I wanted to be healthier, active and realistic, this was also the goal that my doctor suggested.
I guess she sort of won because my goal is now 150.
I struggle with this some, too. I've been 307 at my heaviest and started MFP at 262. I'm now 198 and would definitely like to get to 180. I am 5'8" and 37 yrs old, but have not been at 180 since I was 14 years old (actually maybe 13 years old)...so I know that's a pretty awesome goal and accomplishment I am just 18 lb away from. YES I will probably go lower in the future with my new lifestyle. But I don't feel that I MUST go lower. I am actually very happy with my current size 16 self.
However I get private messages sometimes on here about how 180 is obese (actually not, it's just overweight) and I should aim for 130 or 140 or some other number that a stranger has selected. Rude.
I also cringe when people say to me "keep at it" or "good job, keep it up" and stuff like that. Maybe I'm just stubborn. I know I have more weight to lose! But I feel like they're saying, "You have lost weight but you still need to lose x number of pounds to be normal"
That's terrible, no one is entitled to tell you what your goal weight/size should be. If you like your body just the way it is and are happy with your overall health you shouldn't go further if you don't want to. Ughhh people really bother me sometimes! Can't believe they PM you to tell you what weight you should aim for LOL!0 -
I can change my weight, but ugly comes from the inside.
this, thisthisthis... also, now we really need a thread about people being awesome SOME PEOPLE ARE AWESOME, maybe even A LOT of people are awesome, the people ON THIS THREAD ARE AWESOME and i think we all need to take a moment and remember that
seriously HUGS TO EVERYONE ON THIS THREAD0 -
At a restuarant, a kid pointed at me and said "Mommy, look at the cow." I was 135 lbs and 5ft5in at the time.0
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Oh my goodness, there are so many; but I think the worst one was when I was at a water park with my children. They wasnted me to go down a water slide so bad. Not a problem, it goes down right? We get to the top of the slide and there is water jetting out really fast. You're supposed to sit in an innertube and this jetting water pushes you up and over the hump. I mean there is no way that it won't push you over, it must be coming out at 10oo miles per hour. Well, needless to say; I didn't get over the hump. There were a million people in line and they had to stop the water from the slide and I had to be escorted through the rest of the slide, on-lookers wondering what happened. I'm a 6'1" probably 350lb man and I had to hide my tears of humiliation.0
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I was walking in the parking lot of a strip mall crossing the part where the cars are parked to get to the sidewalk in front of the store I was headed to when this car intentionally ran the stop sign (really who pays attention to those signs anyway). I kind of freaked out and holler for the driver to stop and she yelled back that my fat hiney shouldn't be rolling around in the road. It wasn't overly crowded but there were other spectators and I was tremendously embarrassed. Not to mention that one of my young daughters were with me. Scared for life on that one.
While I'm at it, I'm a closet sneak eater. I will eat in front of you, but I will eat just as much behind your back. Why do I play those games?0 -
my children have been bullied because of my weight. i do not care if you insult me but please do not involve my kids. i was picking them up from school when some of their classmates mooed at me and told them they will be fat like me too. this was my turning point. i had a gastric sleeve done last year and lost nearly 50 pounds but i still have a long journey. my children shouldn't need to suffer because of my weight0
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Reading a lot of these reminds me of a time when I probably embarrassed one of my ex-boyfriends close friends in this way.
There were 6 of us trying to get somewhere and I was the only one with a car. We were in the boyfriend's hometown, so he knew the way to go and said he'd have to drive (this is before GPS) So I began to get in the passenger side while expecting his 4 friends to pile in back.
This wouldn't have been a problem if all of his friends were average sized, but one of the boys was at least 400 lbs. My bf said "Jim is sitting in the front with me" I basically had a fit.
I said things like "FINE. Give ME the keys, IM driving" (Didn't happen) and "Im NOT sitting in the backseat of my OWN car just because HE let himself get HUGE!" I'm sure the last one cut the poor boy pretty bad, but I really wouldn't know... Needless to say, I sat in the back.
The ex and I are still great friends and I've heard through the grapevine that this friend started working out and eating well when he got into college and actually lost a lot of weight. I was so happy to hear that, but always to this day will feel bad for being immature by having a fit and probably hurting this young guy I'm much more sensitive in my older age...0 -
I know that look:-(. My husband is 6'3 and thin. Both of my boys are tall and thin. I'm 5'5 and weigh over 200lbs.0
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