Spanking your kids yes or no?

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  • ldrosophila
    ldrosophila Posts: 7,512 Member
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    So, ask yourself how did you turn out?? . Spanking a child when they need correction is a tool, you don't beat them. I vote with your boyfriend.

    I like many people have issues is that from spanking who knows
  • tlcarolinagirl
    tlcarolinagirl Posts: 1,700 Member
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    I can't even believe I am responding to this because it's so controversial, but here goes.

    So, when my son was younger (around 5-7), he was a little bit of a hellion. I admit I spanked him more than a handful of times. Did it make me feel better? No, it made me feel like *kitten* for spanking him. His daddy and I had no disagreement regarding us spanking him if he truly deserved it, but we had a LOT of problems regarding whether or not other people could spank him. He thinks that it's okay for anyone who is keeping him to spank him. I completely disagree to the point I have made it clear no one else will lay a finger on him...including grandparents. I think part of that is that I wasn't completely in agreement with spanking him. There are plenty of other methods that are effective for discipline. My spanking him was a result of me losing my temper, which is my problem.

    Whether the spanking worked or not, I don't know. All I know is that after age 7, he completely turned around and is the sweetest child you could ever meet...he's 10 now. I haven't spanked him in atleast 3 years and I don't foresee it happening in the near future. Best of luck to the OP. This is a tough one.
  • FredSetToGetFit
    FredSetToGetFit Posts: 286 Member
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    I hear a lot about corporal punishment making children more violent. So, I have been very glad when it was abolished in schools in South Africa where I live. Now all of a sudden I cannot turn on the tv without seeing something horrible happening in school. Teachers are being thrown with brooms, and then posted to youtube as a brag. I see students getting stabbed at school. A friend of ours have a daughter that teaches a primary school class. She told a child to stop misbehaving in class, and when she turned around to write on the black board, the kid hit her with a cricket bat. She woke up in hospital 1 day later. He was 11 years old at the time. NOW, I cannot remember any of this kind of behaviour when I were in school, and we had corporal punishment.
  • cloud2011
    cloud2011 Posts: 898 Member
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    I vote no. If spanking worked, you'd only have to do it once (quoting Dr. Phil here).
  • jacobhyatt91
    jacobhyatt91 Posts: 120 Member
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    J/k I ended up fine but my mom has this disappointed look she gives us if we did something wrong and that's worse than any physical pain.


    Yup that look was waaay worse than any spanking
  • 1911JR
    1911JR Posts: 276
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    My reply is first hand experience. I was spanked as a kid, by parents, grand parents, uncle and even a neighbor a few times. And yes, good old swats at school 4 or 5 times that I remember. Why, because I was a bad little kid and needed it. I am really glad the rod was not spared on me, and I thank them all for everyone I got. Not all kids can be reached with words and time-outs and other forms of non aggressive types of punishment. I turned out just fine and have been successful in life. But without the love from a paddle I could have ended up much different!
  • sowich25
    sowich25 Posts: 70 Member
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    I say yes. As a child the principals in school handed out this disipline out as well. Being the recipient of these I realized that if my behavior continued it would not be good for me. So in the end it was a positive, I no longer did the wrong thing. My parents had a bread board, again I realized right from wrong real quick. In todays society people put thier kids in time out. I have never seen this work. Kids do not fear anything so bad behavior continues. I say spank when needed but do not harm the child. A love tap as a reminder never hurt anyone.
  • reimaka17
    reimaka17 Posts: 48 Member
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    I dont care what the "studies" say. Everyone knows it can be rigged one way or another depending on who is funding it. The lack of discipline in today's kids correlates with the lack of spanking. Nobody in my time will behave like the kids of today behave. Thank God my kids do not act this way. Yes, I spank if I have to, but she is 9 now and I cant even remember the last time I have to do it.

    Do you have statistical proof of this?

    And frankly, children are just as awful as they've always been--they're just less accomplished at hiding it and the world isn't as keen to turn a blind eye to it.
  • Tigg_er
    Tigg_er Posts: 22,001 Member
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    I'll bite. I survived, and I think I turned out better because of the way I was disciplined. My father used his foot if I got out of line. I spank my kids if they need a wake up call, but they also get talked to so they understand the purpose. My kids are incredibly well behaved, they are great with other kids.

    Contrast, My little sister and her husband have different ideas about discipline, the most they do with their son when he get's out of line is put on their non-confrontational tone and say no, don't do that. It doesn't get any more stern from there, and their kid is a mean little ****, who is constantly pushing buttons to see what he can get away with. They're setting that poor kid up for failure later in life.

    Spanking is perfectly healthy so long as it serves a purpose and get's the message across.

    Rigger

    I gotta go with this. I believe I was only spanked once or twice, never needed it again as I gained respect in what may happen if I crossed the line, Later I was more worried I would disapoint my parents then getting a spanking.

    My own Kids I only spanked my boy once--Never had to do it again, My Daughter I never had to. She seen what happened to her brother. It also was not done right away with anger witch would be wrong if you do it because you lost your temper. It needs to be done after you have cooled off. It also gives them time to think about whats gonna happen.

    There are some peoples kids I would not let into my house !
  • PghPensFan69
    PghPensFan69 Posts: 2,393 Member
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    But, go on hitting your kids. You show them who is bigger and stronger. The bully at the school beating up all the smaller kids, that's your kid.

    Look at a bully kid, then look at their parents. Typically, there's a very strong correlation there.

    Do you have a study to support this line of bull? My siblings and I were all spanked, as was my wife. Not a bully in the bunch.

    This is what makes these threads so fun to watch. So many people pulling stuff out of their rear
  • majasmi
    majasmi Posts: 133 Member
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    i think spanking has its place. i would prefer that than my mom looking at me with disappointment, a habit which a parent can easily carry on into adulthood. whereas for my family at least... my mom has stopped spanking us as we know better now.
  • Tigg_er
    Tigg_er Posts: 22,001 Member
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    I dont care what the "studies" say. Everyone knows it can be rigged one way or another depending on who is funding it. The lack of discipline in today's kids correlates with the lack of spanking. Nobody in my time will behave like the kids of today behave. Thank God my kids do not act this way. Yes, I spank if I have to, but she is 9 now and I cant even remember the last time I have to do it.

    Lol.

    There are no studies that support it. None.

    In fact, there have been many where the hypothesis was that spanking is ok, for many of the reasons cited here, and when they're done, the conclusion is that it is not ok.

    But, go on hitting your kids. You show them who is bigger and stronger. The bully at the school beating up all the smaller kids, that's your kid.

    Look at a bully kid, then look at their parents. Typically, there's a very strong correlation there.

    Thats not spanking or discipline , thats a beating--big difference.
    And if you trying to show your kid whos bigger and stronger I think the adult is the one with the major problem.
  • michellekicks
    michellekicks Posts: 3,624 Member
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    Only in extreme circumstances where only spanking will teach them. For example, if they don't eat their exercise calories, or if they do cardio prior to strength training, or if they go on low carb diets, or juice cleanses.

    ^ This.
  • VBnotbitter
    VBnotbitter Posts: 820 Member
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    Ive never spanked but I have a very scary discipline voice honed by years of working friday and saturday nights in an intercity emergency room.

    When I saw who the OP was my first thought was "surely her baby is only a few weeks old and hasnt started playing up yet" :smile:
  • Ed98043
    Ed98043 Posts: 1,333 Member
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    I got a swat on the butt occasionally as a kid (under age 10 or so; after that punishment was grounding or extra chores). There were no belts or wooden spoons and it wasn't a formal "lay across my lap and hold still for your spanking" kind of thing...just a whack if I caught doing something I knew I wasn't supposed to. I see nothing wrong with it - sometimes the only thing a little kid understands is simple and immediate cause and effect. When spanking turns into a major event and leavs marks, that's over the line. But a little temporary stinging on the backside is reasonable in my opinion.
  • V0lver
    V0lver Posts: 915 Member
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    Being as Asian kid, i have been beaten black and blue(with thick wooden rods) as a child untill i was 18. And the more i have thought of those times, the more i have to come to resent them because the beatings were more due to their own anger issues and not so much about my silly screw-ups. Had i got a whack or two when i really did cross the line, i would have been ok with it i think.
  • PghPensFan69
    PghPensFan69 Posts: 2,393 Member
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    But, go on hitting your kids. You show them who is bigger and stronger. The bully at the school beating up all the smaller kids, that's your kid.

    Look at a bully kid, then look at their parents. Typically, there's a very strong correlation there.

    Do you have a study to support this line of bull? My siblings and I were all spanked, as was my wife. Not a bully in the bunch.

    This is what makes these threads so fun to watch. So many people pulling stuff out of their rear

    What makes them funny is people that ignore the research.

    Please share this research connecting spanked kids to becoming bullies. I suspect that there are thousands on this site alone that were spanked that never bullied anyone
  • GetRippedOrDieMirinBrahs
    GetRippedOrDieMirinBrahs Posts: 124
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    Spanking your kids is creepy. Spanking is something you should do to your wife in bed.
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