Spanking your kids yes or no?

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  • beachlover317
    beachlover317 Posts: 2,848 Member
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    Discipline is not abuse. Have you seen the way kids act these days? They are the ones whose parents don't discipline them. Sometimes you have to do more than talk to them and take away their favorite toy. I was spanked and I'm not violent. I learned respect from an early age. Parents let their kids run the show far too often and they think it's cute when that kid is 2, but they're saying something much different when that kid turns 16 and had zero respect for their own parents as well as any other authority figure. Spanking is not abuse.

    You are right - discipline is not abuse. Discipline is teaching and guiding. Discipline is NOT spanking. Teaching respect of others and yourself is part of discipline and does not have to include spanking. If a child is 16 and has zero respect for his/her parents - it's because he was not disciplined or respected during his formative years (birth thru present). Spanking has nothing to do with it.

    Basically, people parent from where they are. Some spank, teach, guide, etc with consistency and their children turn out as happy, healthy people Some use other discipline practices consistently, without spanking and their children also grow into happy, healthy adults. The other side of the coin is a child that has haphazard inconsistent parenting in the formative years (with or without spanking). Those are the children with the problems as they grow into adulthood.
  • PunkyRachel
    PunkyRachel Posts: 1,959 Member
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    Discipline is not abuse. Have you seen the way kids act these days? They are the ones whose parents don't discipline them. Sometimes you have to do more than talk to them and take away their favorite toy. I was spanked and I'm not violent. I learned respect from an early age. Parents let their kids run the show far too often and they think it's cute when that kid is 2, but they're saying something much different when that kid turns 16 and had zero respect for their own parents as well as any other authority figure. Spanking is not abuse.

    And is there proof that the reason "kids these days" misbehave is because of lack of spanking?

    Every time I see a kid acting out all crazy and being disrespectful. I always think to myself. "That kid needs a good *kitten*-whooping!" It teaches respect! If children are not disciplined and taught respect, I fear greatly for our future. I see kids all the time that don't even get time-outs or scolded, parents just let them run a muck and the parents do nothing, because they want to be friends with their kid, instead of the adult figure that child needs.
  • suziepoo1984
    suziepoo1984 Posts: 915 Member
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    Never spanked, not going to spank!!
  • beachlover317
    beachlover317 Posts: 2,848 Member
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    Discipline is not abuse. Have you seen the way kids act these days? They are the ones whose parents don't discipline them. Sometimes you have to do more than talk to them and take away their favorite toy. I was spanked and I'm not violent. I learned respect from an early age. Parents let their kids run the show far too often and they think it's cute when that kid is 2, but they're saying something much different when that kid turns 16 and had zero respect for their own parents as well as any other authority figure. Spanking is not abuse.

    And is there proof that the reason "kids these days" misbehave is because of lack of spanking?

    Every time I see a kid acting out all crazy and being disrespectful. I always think to myself. "That kid needs a good *kitten*-whooping!" It teaches respect! If children are not disciplined and taught respect, I fear greatly for our future. I see kids all the time that don't even get time-outs or scolded, parents just let them run a muck and the parents do nothing, because they want to be friends with their kid, instead of the adult figure that child needs.


    Not true. There are so many children coming out of homes where there is healthy. consistent, nurturing discipline (read: teaching) going on. A child will never learn respect from spanking. It's about consistent teaching of life skills, which does NOT have to include spanking.
  • RockWarrior84
    RockWarrior84 Posts: 839 Member
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    back in the day there was a ton of spanking with paddles, hands, spoons and what not. The whole generation of people before who went through it were not messed up. I was spanked and i am fine.

    IMO kids these days are not properly punished in any more and are little $hits most of the time. Many are rude and treat people like crap. But spanking is more of the "shock" affect on a kid more then the pain and there is an age where going past that age it is useless. I would like to see my parents try to spank me as a teenager lol.
  • DeadliftAddict
    DeadliftAddict Posts: 746 Member
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    Worked for me and I use it now. I use it like most things, as a tool. When I was a kid and got in trouble. I was spoken to before I was spanked. I knew why I was being spanked. Hitting with no reason or with no understanding from your kids doesn't make since to me. If it got to a spanking I had already been told a few times I should be doing what I was doing to get the spanking.
  • DeadliftAddict
    DeadliftAddict Posts: 746 Member
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    back in the day there was a ton of spanking with paddles, hands, spoons and what not. The whole generation of people before who went through it were not messed up. I was spanked and i am fine.

    IMO kids these days are not properly punished in any more and are little $hits most of the time. Many are rude and treat people like crap. But spanking is more of the "shock" affect on a kid more then the pain and there is an age where going past that age it is useless. I would like to see my parents try to spank me as a teenager lol.


    Amen to that!
  • RockWarrior84
    RockWarrior84 Posts: 839 Member
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    Discipline is not abuse. Have you seen the way kids act these days? They are the ones whose parents don't discipline them. Sometimes you have to do more than talk to them and take away their favorite toy. I was spanked and I'm not violent. I learned respect from an early age. Parents let their kids run the show far too often and they think it's cute when that kid is 2, but they're saying something much different when that kid turns 16 and had zero respect for their own parents as well as any other authority figure. Spanking is not abuse.

    And is there proof that the reason "kids these days" misbehave is because of lack of spanking?

    lack of discipline in general. Parents just do not know how to anymore. Pretty much the only thing that i ever see is verbal with no action to back it up.
  • Jerrypeoples
    Jerrypeoples Posts: 1,541 Member
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    you should never spank your kids. just shake the crap outta them
  • DeadliftAddict
    DeadliftAddict Posts: 746 Member
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    Discipline is not abuse. Have you seen the way kids act these days? They are the ones whose parents don't discipline them. Sometimes you have to do more than talk to them and take away their favorite toy. I was spanked and I'm not violent. I learned respect from an early age. Parents let their kids run the show far too often and they think it's cute when that kid is 2, but they're saying something much different when that kid turns 16 and had zero respect for their own parents as well as any other authority figure. Spanking is not abuse.

    And is there proof that the reason "kids these days" misbehave is because of lack of spanking?

    Every time I see a kid acting out all crazy and being disrespectful. I always think to myself. "That kid needs a good *kitten*-whooping!" It teaches respect! If children are not disciplined and taught respect, I fear greatly for our future. I see kids all the time that don't even get time-outs or scolded, parents just let them run a muck and the parents do nothing, because they want to be friends with their kid, instead of the adult figure that child needs.


    Not true. There are so many children coming out of homes where there is healthy. consistent, nurturing discipline (read: teaching) going on. A child will never learn respect from spanking. It's about consistent teaching of life skills, which does NOT have to include spanking.

    All that stuff you are talking is great and I agree. But once you have told multiple times. It's time for more than nurturing to occur on that behind. Doesn't make that person a bad parent.
  • JustYandy
    JustYandy Posts: 221 Member
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    1 quick swat to get there attention to not do something(example toddler running in the road) as they age 3 swats no more no less as kids age things dont work as well just like my kids no longer care if they stand in a corner or my lil brother when I was a kid would laugh at my mom when he got a spanking...there is a time when it's no longer effective and you find other ways that will prevent further spanking or out of control violence NO MORE THEN 3....well thats what we do in our home.Also goes with the saying "TIME OUT 1 min per year of age any longer and they forget why they are even there or just get angry and stop focusing on the real behavior.
  • smanning1982
    smanning1982 Posts: 210 Member
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    Yes I will spank my kids if they need it! I have 4 kids ages 4,5,10 and 14. All of them have been spanked. I save spanking for when they are really bad though and they hardly ever get spanked. In the last year I have spanked my 4 year old probably 4 times and my 5 year old like twice. BUT, the fact is, they are pretty darn good kids BECAUSE they know I will and have spanked them. My 14 yr old has been spanked probably 10-15 times in her whole life. Everyone tells me how well behaved my kids are, and it's because I discipline them. Grounding or standing in the corner usually works, but if not they will get a spanking. I swat them once or twice on the butt, definitely not child abuse.
  • DeadliftAddict
    DeadliftAddict Posts: 746 Member
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    I vote no. If spanking worked, you'd only have to do it once (quoting Dr. Phil here).

    Ok. I'm not saying yes or no to spanking, but while he says if it worked you only have to do it once. He also says the other methods need to be done until they work, which is more than once. Dr Phil is a d-bag.

    Yeah, I thought the same when I read this. I can't take anyone that quotes Dr. Phil seriously

    Tell Dr. Phil to go somewhere and do some push ups.
  • smanning1982
    smanning1982 Posts: 210 Member
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    And to add on, I am also friends with many parents that do not believe in spanking at all, and every one of them has rude, wild, and just all over bad kids. Why? Because they know the parent won't do a darn thing about it!
  • DeadliftAddict
    DeadliftAddict Posts: 746 Member
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    I say yes to spanking/popping. That's what's wrong with this generation. Parents are way too soft. The fact that a kid got off a DUI/Murder charge for affluenza makes me sick.

    http://www.nytimes.com/roomfordebate/2014/02/18/affluenza-and-life-circumstances-in-sentencing?hp&rref=opinion

    Yes I know this is an extreme version but I do feel like parents are too soft and society is allowing it to happen. This is just an example of what I'm talking about.

    I'm not advocating beating your child and I don't spank my children every single time but when they deserve it they get it. Most the time putting my 4 year old in time out is enough and it's extremely rare he deserves a spanking.

    The punishment has to fit the crime for example my daughter right before spring break bullied a child on the bus. During the entire spring break she didn't say a word to either one of us, when school started back the principal called me apologizing they didn't reach me sooner and explained the entire situation.

    When my daughter came home I asked her maybe half a dozen times how was school and if she had anything she wanted to talk about. She was 8 at the time and avoided all the questions. When we got home I had someone else watch my son (my mom was staying with us) and I proceeded to bully my daughter. I pushed her down, wouldn't let her talk, wouldn't let her get up, and kept asking if she liked this. When she proceeded to scream "why are you bullying me?" I then asked her if she thought that's how the young boy on the bus felt. Afterwards I made her go to her room and write an apology to the young man. The next
    morning we walked on the bus together and she read the letter out loud to the entire bus.

    To this day my daughter has never bullied anyone. Did I spank my daughter ..nope but I wanted to show her exactly how she made that young boy feel and I think I got my point across.

    You, sir.... I bow to you! I would've done the same thing. You taught her a very valuable lesson. I saw on the news one time a girl had bullied someone for not having name brand clothing. What did her mom do? She bought old raggedy clothing from Goodwill and made her daughter where it to school the next day. People were saying the punishment didn't fit the crime. Bull****! She got exactly what she deserved. A taste of her own medicine.

    There's a certain respect we need to have for people around us and if kids can't see or understand that they need to be taught those lessons. I'm not saying beat the child, but if you exhaust all means and the child continues to do those things then maybe a swat is the answer. And if that doesn't work then I would say a little family counseling might need to happen because there could be a root cause.

    Love both of the bullying examples. Great parenting, in my opinion.

    Now that was refreshing to read.
  • DirtyCurvesAhead
    DirtyCurvesAhead Posts: 121
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    I believe spanking has it's place. I have a 4 yearold who has learned to undo his car seat buckles. As I was driving down the interstate he announced "mom I am getting out". I promptly told him no he could get hurt and it was not safe. I reminded him that mommy has to wear a seat belt to keep her safe too. He undid it anyway and began to crawl into the front seat with me. I calmly pulled the car to the shoulder of the road and told him he was going to be spanked for doing something soo dangerous. He was in tears before I had him across my knee but I gave him 4 spanks on the butt. And then buckled him back in his seat. We sat on the side of the road till he calmed down enough for me to talk about what happened.

    He can't grasp the consiquences of a possible accident but he knows that taking his seatbelt off while we are driving will result in pain.
  • BlessedJourney29
    BlessedJourney29 Posts: 9
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    LOL I remember the time I was not back inside the house before the street lights had come on. Oh my mother was waiting for me at the front door with a switch from the tree. She tore my butt up! I will surely tell you that before the street lights came back on I was back at home from playing outside each night!!! She would always sit me down and explain why I got my butt whipping and I vowed that I would never spank my kids. I love my mom more than anything in the world. She was a single mom with 4 kids in medical school. She raised 4 very smart and successful girls on her own who all have children and oh yes, I have no problem spanking mine when they get out of order! but they know that I love them and they are smart, happy ones! I will however never use any object except my hand and by the age of 5 or 6 spankings are usually reverted to reading a book with no tv for a few days etc.
  • carlalovescake
    carlalovescake Posts: 42
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    I vote No

    I have two children, I don't spank them and they are well behaved and respectful.

    My Eldest child (aged 11) said a bad look from me is more then enough to make him feel like he is doing something wrong. That and taking away computer games!

    My youngest says taking away his beloved teddy or his spider man toys does the trick :)

    I always feel that if you smack/spank your children, where do you go from that point when they are older?
  • wanzik
    wanzik Posts: 326 Member
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    Definitely YES! When and if needed. If they are well behaved and respectful, obviously spankings aren't needed. And I'm not talking beating or leaving bruises. Just enough to get their attention. I got it couple times myself when I deserved it.
  • BlessedJourney29
    BlessedJourney29 Posts: 9
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    I believe spanking has it's place. I have a 4 yearold who has learned to undo his car seat buckles. As I was driving down the interstate he announced "mom I am getting out". I promptly told him no he could get hurt and it was not safe. I reminded him that mommy has to wear a seat belt to keep her safe too. He undid it anyway and began to crawl into the front seat with me. I calmly pulled the car to the shoulder of the road and told him he was going to be spanked for doing something soo dangerous. He was in tears before I had him across my knee but I gave him 4 spanks on the butt. And then buckled him back in his seat. We sat on the side of the road till he calmed down enough for me to talk about what happened.

    He can't grasp the consiquences of a possible accident but he knows that taking his seatbelt off while we are driving will result in pain.

    I'm with you on this one! I was at walmart not too long ago and a 3 year or 4 year old child was throwing a major fit in the checkout line. the mother was sooooo calm. she excused herself and took her child into the bathroom. I think i know what happneded in there but that child came out quiet and much calmer. i agree kids will learn the result b/c at a young age they do not understand consequence
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