My husband says he isn't attracted to skinny women

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  • DavPul
    DavPul Posts: 61,406 Member
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    best not to take any chances. there is only one proper course of action






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  • maab_connor
    maab_connor Posts: 3,927 Member
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    some guys are chubby chasers. everyone has a type.

    while the answer SHOULD be that this is your husband and you guys have made vows... sometimes it's not that simple. I think you two need to sit down and have a very serious, very open conversation. you want to lose weight, not your husband.

    my dad was a chubby chaser and every time my mom tried to lose weight, he would sabotage it. IDK if he meant to or if it was a subconscious thing. I know that it pissed my mom off. I also know that it worked. every time. to the point that he's been gone for almost 20 years and she STILL can't lose weight past that point that he would always sabotage.

    I think that having a talk first - letting him know what your goals are and asking him to support you and LISTEN to what he has to say in return. letting him know that you're honestly worried that you getting healthy might affect your marriage now might just save it later.
  • Sovi_
    Sovi_ Posts: 575 Member
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    LIES
  • Mainebikerchick
    Mainebikerchick Posts: 1,573 Member
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    LIES

    Agreed.
  • alexisdc
    alexisdc Posts: 117 Member
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    Have you asked him this?
    Uh this...i'm gonna go out on a limb and say he knows your getting fit and healthy. This will result in you getting thin, so how does he feel about that. I would be asking him.
  • Mia_RagazzaTosta
    Mia_RagazzaTosta Posts: 4,885 Member
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    So...what do YOU want?
  • SunofaBeach14
    SunofaBeach14 Posts: 4,899 Member
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    LIES

    Agreed.

    In to hear more about these lies men tell women. I'm intrigued.
  • Pipsg1rl
    Pipsg1rl Posts: 1,414 Member
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    Not everyone's marriage is the same.

    I'm here with 16 years of being with my best friend. I guess I know he's not going to leave me for some stupid Victoria's Secret model. How else am I supposed to EASILY grab references of body types and sit on the couch or at the table for an open conversation.

    If she were my best friend that would be my advice to her. I'm (not) sorry some of you think I give bad advice. You don't have to take it.

    But stop making me into some terrible person for trying to be helpful.
  • Still_Fluffy
    Still_Fluffy Posts: 341 Member
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    Is not skinny code for - he likes girls with big boobs and a butt? If so you can lose weight and still keep those assets (see what did there). Take up weight lifting to help keep what goods you've got.
  • lsorci919
    lsorci919 Posts: 772 Member
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    My husband is the same. He has always dated woman a bit on the thicker side. BUT I can tell he has enjoyed the weight I've lost just as much as I have. I think, now I may be wrong, that when they say skinny they mean underweight and what they are attracted to is curves.
  • summertime_girl
    summertime_girl Posts: 3,945 Member
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    Maybe he doesn't like skinny girls. I'm not particularly attracted to skinny guys. And I have no interest in being skinny myself. But he could be referring to Kate Moss skinny, and you could be thinking one of the girls showcased in She Squats, Bro. Those girls are in NO WAY fat, but they sure aren't skinny either.
  • msf74
    msf74 Posts: 3,498 Member
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    I know this might be a bit of a radical idea but...

    do you think that some men marry women because they love them for the totality of who they are and are flexible when it comes to body size unless taken to extremes?
  • iAMaPhoenix
    iAMaPhoenix Posts: 1,038 Member
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    All men are attracted to women...Period. Skinny, fat, one leg, three arms, eye in middle of head. boobs on her neck, bald headed, facial hair(maybe that is a little too far), but you get the point. While we may have our preference, we are attracted to anyone. That is all!
  • Amber82479
    Amber82479 Posts: 629 Member
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    I think that if a person loves another, their size doesn't really matter. My husband has been anywhere from 150 - 190lbs. since we've been together the last 14 years and I've loved him at both ends of the spectrum. If you truly love someone, their size won't stop that love.
  • minimalistmom
    minimalistmom Posts: 137
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    My husband was the same way. He even married me at my heaviest (260-270 lbs.), and he never complained when I dropped the weight hitting a size 12. He loves me for me, not for what I look like. I just had my 3rd c-section and even now, swollen and feeling crappy about myself and wanting to scratch my eyes out because I can't stand looking at myself, he still looks at me and says, "you'll fit your skinny clothes, just not right this minute. You had a baby and you don't shrink over night." So even though he likes chunky women, he doesn't care how skinny I am, as long as I'm happy with myself.
  • Orion782
    Orion782 Posts: 391
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    Your husband is a "liar". All men are attracted to women...Period. Skinny, fat, one leg, three arms, eye in middle of head. boobs on her neck, bald headed, facial hair(maybe that is a little too far), but you get the point. While we may have our preference, we are attracted to anyone who has a natural frontal opening!!! That is all!

    Dunno about that one, brosef. I have "standards" too. They usually include more than just having a vag.:ohwell:
  • EHisCDN
    EHisCDN Posts: 480 Member
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    Clearly he's going to leave you. Your best bet is to not change and in fact do whatever is needed to make your physical appearance more in line with what he desires.

    This actually made me LOL at my computer screen.
    I know this might be a bit of a radical idea but...

    do you think that some men marry women because they love them for the totality of who they are and are flexible when it comes to body size unless taken to extremes?
    This is what I like to think.
  • summertime_girl
    summertime_girl Posts: 3,945 Member
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    Your husband is a "liar". All men are attracted to women...Period. Skinny, fat, one leg, three arms, eye in middle of head. boobs on her neck, bald headed, facial hair(maybe that is a little too far), but you get the point. While we may have our preference, we are attracted to anyone who has a natural frontal opening!!! That is all!

    I know a lot of guys who are not attracted to women. And I know guys who certainly have preferences beyond just what's between a girls' legs.
  • lbsNirvana
    lbsNirvana Posts: 18 Member
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    Think there s a lot of middle ground between "thick' and skinny....so, just stop losing weight @ the point where he finds you less attractive....and its always easier to gain weight anyway :)
  • msf74
    msf74 Posts: 3,498 Member
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    he doesn't care how skinny I am, as long as I'm happy with myself.

    I think sometimes the pressure people put on themselves to look a certain way and the anxiety that brings into a relationship hurts the relationship more than actually being a certain size.

    I say this quite honestly, and I suspect many men are the same, the size my wife is happiest at is the one I am happiest at because she is just...happy.

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