Friends say I am too skinny now

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  • Iwishyouwell
    Iwishyouwell Posts: 1,888 Member
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    If you were significantly overweight take every "you're too skinny" comment made about you with BOULDERS of salt.

    The people who are around us most are often the worse judges when it comes to our weight loss. Many, if not most, are carrying around a fat picture of you in their minds so being significantly smaller than that is "skinny". You could still have 50 lbs left to lose before you even taste a reasonable size, but if you've already lost 100lbs so many people use to obese you will think you look "too skinny".

    True "too skinny", as in underweight territory, is if you ever get to a size that a significant amount of strangers, who have no idea you were once fat, would be concerned about. Truth is almost no formerly fat or obese person ever gets to their actual healthy low weight, much less underweight. Often times, when you've been obese, the point where you friends and family start screaming "too skinny" might actually be somebody else's STARTING point.
  • fionarama
    fionarama Posts: 788 Member
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    they're just jealous. Don't worry about it.
  • JonnyQwest
    JonnyQwest Posts: 174 Member
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    That means you have succeeded....Congratulations!
  • JoRocka
    JoRocka Posts: 17,525 Member
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    I'd get beast- and flex and say you want to talk to my microphone? **Shakes right hand**

    or maybe the back up? **Shakes left** in case that one doesn't work.

    moar weights!!! and a good case of doesn'tgiveafu*k.

    People always have opinions about stuff that isn't relevant to them.
  • CharleeCali
    CharleeCali Posts: 51 Member
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    OMGosh! I'm living for the day someone tells me I've lost too much weight! :happy:

    Here's a trick I sometimes use: Keep a little box of Tic Tacs (or whatever) in your pocket, at your desk, or just handy. When someone starts saying something rude or inappropriate, draw back, making a horrified face, and offer them a mint. If nothing else, it SHUTS them up because they think their breath is awful. And now they have something else to worry about.

    I think even at 10 pounds lighter than your picture, you must look great! Congratulations!
  • becs3578
    becs3578 Posts: 836 Member
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    I'm getting it too.. and I am not even to goal.. and not "skinny".. Ha.. I went from a 12/14 to a size 6. I am about 9 lbs to my original goal and then I will reevaluate. Having issues now with friends and family who said "oh if you lose any more you will look sick... etc". No I won't because I know my % of body fat and I could still stand to lose some of it.. and still want to gain more muscle...

    I think people are so use to the OLD ME the NEW ME makes them a little uncomfortable to be honest. But I took this journey/quest on with only myself as the cheerleader (And then my crossfit family and a runner friend) and I am gonna finish it that way.

    However.. it will never be finished because I now love pushing my self to succeed. It is really empowering.
  • bumblebreezy91
    bumblebreezy91 Posts: 520 Member
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    I've had a few of these comments. Funny how the same people weren't as concerned for my health when I was obese.

    As long as you're happy and healthy, carry on. I am!

    This.

    I'm currently still "obese" and nobody has said much. I am just waiting - WAITING, I tell you - for all these people around me, especially a choice few, to suddenly get concerned with how small I am when they couldn't care less now.
  • fittocycle
    fittocycle Posts: 827 Member
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    I think people have become skewed as to what is a normal weight. So many people are overweight that after a while, it almost seems normal. You look great so I wouldn't worry about it at all! If your doctor is fine with it, then who are others to judge you.

    It's happened to me before too. (my picture isn't current). I'm 5' 3" (barely) and weigh between 125-127. I have a small build too. The lower portion of my arms have always looked thin and they still are today. However, I wear a size 6 or 8 so I feel like I'm a decent size for my weight. It is frustrating when you feel healthy and happy at your weight and then someone tells you that you look too thin. It tends to mess with your body perception.

    Good luck to you and don't worry. If you're at a healthy weight, then stick with it!!
  • Mojoman02
    Mojoman02 Posts: 146 Member
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    They are jealous or stupid...or both! If you're happy, that's all that matters.
  • littleburgy
    littleburgy Posts: 570 Member
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    People who are used to seeing you carry more weight perceived that as normal. In comparison, seeing that weight drop somehow looks abnormally thin to them in comparison. Had they met you at your goal weight, I bet they wouldn't think anything of it.

    Calling someone a "cancer patient" is a pretty insensitive thing to say, though. On so many levels.

    It's odd how perceptions change. I now see myself as normal, and didn't really see myself as being all that heavy before. Now when I see some photos, I view myself in those old photos as being much chunkier than I did before. Go figure.
  • Alassonde
    Alassonde Posts: 228 Member
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    I have always found it ironic how people have absolutely no problem telling people they are too skinny but would never dream of calling someone fat to their face. They don't understand that it's an insult.....they're still telling me my body is not right the way it is. Why is it even their business? I get really angry when I read online comments about how "real women have curves" and being skinny is unnatural, men don't like skinny women, etc. I was naturally VERY thin for most of my life (underweight until I hit about 35 years old) and these comments are very hurtful. Maybe it would have been less offensive if I wasn't naturally that way, but it's not like I could even help it. I would say ignore everyone and get to the weight that you feel is right for you. As long as you are healthy, yours is the opinion that matters.
  • JenRunTriHappyGirl
    JenRunTriHappyGirl Posts: 521 Member
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    A friend of mine told me that I was too skinny and then she threw in "scarey skinny." I just said thank you and moved on. It was the first time she saw me since I lost a majority of the weight. She hasn't said anything since. Sometimes the way you look can shock people and since you have been seeing yourself through the whole process, it might not register what a dramatic change it really is. As long as you are happy and you are eating then do not let it get to you. The shock will wear off.
  • furrina
    furrina Posts: 148 Member
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    No kidding i hadn't seen a few friends for about 6 months and they thought i was dying, one lad said i looked like i had aids which was nice, the thing is if you lose a lot of weight you will look different, i weigh roughly what i did at 19 and no one thought i was dying then

    I had a bet with the guy who thought i had aids on our strength he lost big time which was nice especially after i patted his belly afterwards

    awe.
    some.
  • furrina
    furrina Posts: 148 Member
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    crabs in bucket: when one gets close to the top and is about to climb out and escape, the others grab it and pull it back down. ignore.

    :laugh:
  • DebinMelbourne
    DebinMelbourne Posts: 134 Member
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    I'm 5ft 6in, and most of my adult life I was around 125 -130. No one ever called me skinny! I went through the dreaded menopause and broke my ankle two different times, all of which contributed to me ending up at 170 pounds. With diet and lots of exercise, I'm down to 140, and people are now saying I'm too skinny. Ummmm, no I'm not. I've just lost weight. It's a combination of a little envy, a little of friends wanting me to drink more alcohol and eat crappy foods, and a little of friends feeling guilty because they don't exercise. Believe me, I don't preach to others. I'm just going about my business of feeling better and more healthy.

    I'm going to keep going to ditch the last 10 pounds, and I will be ignoring others' comments.
  • svelt123
    svelt123 Posts: 173 Member
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    :flowerforyou: Know thy Self. You know that you are now healthy and happy. Maybe either educate those who are saying that now you are too thin or make new Real friends.

    Congrats. to you!!!:smile:
  • clarebear230786
    clarebear230786 Posts: 30 Member
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    These comments often come from jealous people who need to lose weight themselves!
    Even though it's hard, just ignore them :)
  • amandakev88
    amandakev88 Posts: 328 Member
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    20 bucks says its jealousy.

    if you're happy with the way you look, tell them to piss off or that you'll find new friends. -fin-
  • Laura3BB
    Laura3BB Posts: 250 Member
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    My take on this is a little different.
    maybe ok it's jealousy and so on.
    Or....
    Maybe you are a little too thin. Very thin people do not look so great. Let's all stay in the normal BMI range!
  • CrazyC
    CrazyC Posts: 284 Member
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    For some reason, I've found that people are more open to telling others they think they're "too skinny" as opposed to telling them they're "too fat". I've gotten the too skinny comment starting around when I was at 115 (I'm 5'3"). Currently, I'm 103 and trying to gain a couple of pounds back before returning to maintanence. I've gotten downright rude comments from co-workers, but luckily my real friends and my family and husband are supportive and encouraging. Even though it bothers me to hear the thoughtless comments like "eat something", "too skinny", "you're going to disappear", etc, I just have to chalk it up to those people not having good manners. You've worked hard to get to the weight you want! Don't let anyone tell you otherwise or discourage you! As long as you're happy and healthy, try not to worry about what everyone else thinks and says. There's no point in letting their senselessness or jealousy upset you.


    ^^^^^^ this! This was YOUR journey and no one's business until/unless you make it theirs. People can be so rude, insensitive, judgmental *kitten*. Sorry, but true, especially strangers or people that don't know you. I know it's hard to not to take to heart, but like you said your TRUE family and friends love and support you and are happy and excited that you chose to love yourself to get healthy for yourself and them. You should be damn proud. You look FABULOUS! Do NOT anyone rain on your parade or steal your thunder, honey! :heart: and ((hugs)). I don't even know you, and I'm proud of you and everyone here that has decided to take back their lives and health and love THEMSELVES AGAIN to be as healthy as they can be. We ALL DESERVE IT!! :wink:

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