People suck.
Replies
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People do suck. I don't really think people realize how comments they make effect people. Its good you stayed strong.0
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I came in here to tell you to lighten up and live a little, but yeah, the people you work with suck.0
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Planned potlucks are my favorite. I will go around and ask what people are planning on bringing (don't want to bring the same thing as someone else, do I?) and when I hear something that sounds good (or that I may be able to fit into my macros), I ask for the recipe. I also plan on bringing two things, one of which is salad. That way, I can sample my pre-logged portions from my recipe collection and have some salad that I can be confident about content. I bring my own salad dressing and allow myself one small dessert. EDIT: I can't eat beef because I can't digest it, so it's a great opener for asking what people are bringing.
Starting out was petrifying for me, so I tended to be more tense about eating something I hadn't researched and logged ahead of time. As time goes on, I'm finding that everything I want to eat can fit into my day if I give it a few minutes of my time ahead of schedule.
Stay strong, but don't be afraid to relax a bit with food events. All will be well.0 -
So today we had a slightly impromptu potluck and I thought I'd share the results. It was slightly impromptu because I completely forgot about it until last night.
I managed to leave 500 calories in my day, AND I ate the potluck food, AND I didn't have to come to MFP to rant about the stuff your face fest or how horrible people treated me.
I managed all of that by offering to cook something I knew fit into my calories (shredded chicken taco filling with red leaf lettuce wrap), taking small portions of food I had to have, and not taking one of everything. I had a half of a doughnut, a half cup of corn salad, and turned down the queso and chips. No one asked me why I wasn't taking queso, because I was engaging with them, had food on my plate, and didn't act like this was some huge conscious act of sabotage to my diet.
Also, just to note, people not liking what one is doing is NOT a sign of jealousy. I wish people would stop with that.
Person #1 "That girl said my dress was unflattering."
Person #2 "Oh nevermind her, she's just jealous you can wear those (bright clashing fugly) prints."
Person #1 "Oh yeah, totally. Poor loser."
No, she's not jealous. That's really an unflattering dress. But if it makes one feel better when one receives criticism, well, okay then.
Wow, that was hostile.
Straight truth =/= Hostile. Sorry you don't understand it.
Straight truth + snarky sarcasm = Hostile. Sorry you missed that part of charm school.0 -
Me thinks you should look up the definition of 'hostile'. It's called bluntness and snark.
Oh yeah. And truth.
There ya go "sweetheart":
hos·tile
ˈhästl,ˈhäˌstīl/Submit
adjective
1.unfriendly; antagonistic.
Yep, sounds about right.0 -
So today we had a slightly impromptu potluck and I thought I'd share the results. It was slightly impromptu because I completely forgot about it until last night.
I managed to leave 500 calories in my day, AND I ate the potluck food, AND I didn't have to come to MFP to rant about the stuff your face fest or how horrible people treated me.
I managed all of that by offering to cook something I knew fit into my calories (shredded chicken taco filling with red leaf lettuce wrap), taking small portions of food I had to have, and not taking one of everything. I had a half of a doughnut, a half cup of corn salad, and turned down the queso and chips. No one asked me why I wasn't taking queso, because I was engaging with them, had food on my plate, and didn't act like this was some huge conscious act of sabotage to my diet.
Also, just to note, people not liking what one is doing is NOT a sign of jealousy. I wish people would stop with that.
Person #1 "That girl said my dress was unflattering."
Person #2 "Oh nevermind her, she's just jealous you can wear those (bright clashing fugly) prints."
Person #1 "Oh yeah, totally. Poor loser."
No, she's not jealous. That's really an unflattering dress. But if it makes one feel better when one receives criticism, well, okay then.
Wow, that was hostile.
Straight truth =/= Hostile. Sorry you don't understand it.
Straight truth + snarky sarcasm = Hostile. Sorry you missed that part of charm school.
Wow, that was hostile.
Op can have her (low) opinion about whatever. I can too. Lighten up, Francis.0 -
Wow, that was hostile.
Op can have her (low) opinion about whatever. I can too. Lighten up, Francis.
Oh I'm sorry internet gangster, I didn't know your opinion HAD to include patronizing her. Good job though, I'm sure you helped.0 -
I came in here to tell you to lighten up and live a little, but yeah, the people you work with suck.
^^ this.
i was going to say exactly the same thing, sometimes it is better to eat a little of the "food fest" to avoid having to explain to every judgmental person! but after reading how your colleagues behaved, i think they deserved more than your polite reserve!0 -
If involved in a potluck be the one who brings something healthy. That's what I usually do. Luckily I work with a few awesome ppl and we have each others back.0
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Work potlucks. I'm retired and so glad not have to deal with junk fests at the office. I remember them well though!
Yeah, be the one that brings the salad. Have that for lunch with some of the garbage side dishes. Eat the salad and mush the other stuff around while walking around gabbing. A couple of bites of something that really looks good won't hurt your diet too much.
If there's cake, scrape off the frosting and mush it about with the cake. It looks like you''ve been eating it.
Be sure to tell everyone how good everything was. Ask for recipes. Hah.0 -
So today we had a slightly impromptu potluck and I thought I'd share the results. It was slightly impromptu because I completely forgot about it until last night.
I managed to leave 500 calories in my day, AND I ate the potluck food, AND I didn't have to come to MFP to rant about the stuff your face fest or how horrible people treated me.
I managed all of that by offering to cook something I knew fit into my calories (shredded chicken taco filling with red leaf lettuce wrap), taking small portions of food I had to have, and not taking one of everything. I had a half of a doughnut, a half cup of corn salad, and turned down the queso and chips. No one asked me why I wasn't taking queso, because I was engaging with them, had food on my plate, and didn't act like this was some huge conscious act of sabotage to my diet.
Also, just to note, people not liking what one is doing is NOT a sign of jealousy. I wish people would stop with that.
Person #1 "That girl said my dress was unflattering."
Person #2 "Oh nevermind her, she's just jealous you can wear those (bright clashing fugly) prints."
Person #1 "Oh yeah, totally. Poor loser."
No, she's not jealous. That's really an unflattering dress. But if it makes one feel better when one receives criticism, well, okay then.
Wow, that was hostile.
Straight truth =/= Hostile. Sorry you don't understand it.
Straight truth + snarky sarcasm = Hostile. Sorry you missed that part of charm school.
agreed its unnecessary rudeness. unless she asked the person what she thought about the dress.0 -
op you either meet them at their level or wait for them to get bored and leave you alone. so many people on this site keep saying take control and if that means taking in your own lunch and sticking to it so be it0
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Its really good you resisted because I'm having a working lunch today and I will not be resisting but I will be taking the healthy option (if there is one). Keep doing what your doing
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Me thinks you should look up the definition of 'hostile'. It's called bluntness and snark.
Oh yeah. And truth.
There ya go "sweetheart":
hos·tile
ˈhästl,ˈhäˌstīl/Submit
adjective
1.unfriendly; antagonistic.
Yep, sounds about right.
Gee, thanks for the fake pet names. Means so much coming from you. What, exactly, is unfriendly about suggesting alternate methods of dealing with a luncheon or suggesting that people aren't jealous. Snark doesn't automatically equal hostile. I don't know if you have an issue with it because you agree with the OP or what, but hostility implies anger and aggression, of which... there's none.
Wow, that was hostile.
Op can have her (low) opinion about whatever. I can too. Lighten up, Francis.
Oh I'm sorry internet gangster, I didn't know your opinion HAD to include patronizing her. Good job though, I'm sure you helped.
What's up kettle, meet the pot. Calling someone out for snark and patronizing, and then being snarky and patronizing back.... interesting method of conversation you have here.0 -
So today we had a slightly impromptu potluck and I thought I'd share the results. It was slightly impromptu because I completely forgot about it until last night.
I managed to leave 500 calories in my day, AND I ate the potluck food, AND I didn't have to come to MFP to rant about the stuff your face fest or how horrible people treated me.
I managed all of that by offering to cook something I knew fit into my calories (shredded chicken taco filling with red leaf lettuce wrap), taking small portions of food I had to have, and not taking one of everything. I had a half of a doughnut, a half cup of corn salad, and turned down the queso and chips. No one asked me why I wasn't taking queso, because I was engaging with them, had food on my plate, and didn't act like this was some huge conscious act of sabotage to my diet.
Also, just to note, people not liking what one is doing is NOT a sign of jealousy. I wish people would stop with that.
Person #1 "That girl said my dress was unflattering."
Person #2 "Oh nevermind her, she's just jealous you can wear those (bright clashing fugly) prints."
Person #1 "Oh yeah, totally. Poor loser."
No, she's not jealous. That's really an unflattering dress. But if it makes one feel better when one receives criticism, well, okay then.
Wow, that was hostile.
Straight truth =/= Hostile. Sorry you don't understand it.
Straight truth + snarky sarcasm = Hostile. Sorry you missed that part of charm school.
agreed its unnecessary rudeness. unless she asked the person what she thought about the dress.
Maybe it's all a different of opinion on how you take what people say then? Because if I looked like a moo-cow in something I was wearing, I would hope that someone would be willing to tell me instead of fake kindness and then talking about it behind my back.
But then again, I would rather practice moderation because I know that life doesn't boil down to boiled vegetables for me. Different strokes for different folks!0 -
wow... no offense but your coworkers are *kitten*. Good job staying strong. I work in a hospital and we have free food allllllll the time and it is so hard to not give in but I know being healthy is way more important : )0
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i did not read through whole thread here is my contribution ..
they way you described the office lunch is totally snotty ….i own a small business and we have lunches once or twice a month where we buy food and some cake for the employees and we do it as kind of a "thank you" for all their hard work …so lighten up on the criticism of having an "office party" …a lot of places don't give a damn about their employees..
second - the people you work with you are idiots and if someone stuck a plate in my face then I would of given them a five count and then smacked it into their face..
in closing..attitude adjustment on office party ..but your below employees suck ...0 -
When my office has a luncheon or potluck I don't eat tons and tons of food...I just eat a normal amount of food and enjoy myself. There are some really exceptional cooks at my office and I enjoy their cooking and I can easily manage to hit my calorie goals and macro goals. Portion control is a beautiful thing...you don't have to eat granola bars and diet food and what not to lose weight...you can eat actual food and stuff.
this ….when we have one I will have a little bit of what we have and a tiny piece of cake and fit it into my day …no harm, no foul0 -
I find it interesting that you are willing to look down on them for their food choices (a perfect example would be how you describe the potluck to begin with) but feel very victimized that they were "looking down" on your choices.
I mean, what horrible people you work with, trying to make the new people feel welcomed and creating a social event that will encourage office morale. How terrible that they would want to be sure you were included.
Instead of sitting on your impossibly high pedestal, why didn't you make something *you* approve of and share it, and maybe educate those heathens on the benefits of clean eating?
But hey, I am sure working yourself up into a lathered rage burns way more calories than getting along with the folks at work.
Sorry, but I am not going to pat you on the back for this one.
Whoa hold on there sally sad face... I think this response was a bit over the line.
1. She didn't look down on anyone for their food choices. She DID however prefer to stick to her diet plan... social hour wasn't important to her as staying dedicated to her goals. Nothing wrong with that at all. Not a single word of her post included, "I told them how horrible their food was for me" or "It wasn't food skinny people eat"... She merely stated it was a all you can eat event she wasn't ready to partake in at this point in her plan. Might not have been great wording.. I'll agree to that.. but she has every right to chose what she will and won't eat.
2. She still attended the event to be social. To be disrespectful would have been to avoid the event entirely.
3. She did make something for herself.. that was what she got criticized for. Yet not many people jib the body builder for his/her protein shakes... but try sure do love to harass the girl trying to just lose unwanted weight.
4. She's not raging at all. Just trying to deal with how difficult this is for everyone who is just starting the process. It happens all the time, it's not new to her situation. People are naturally thrown off when others take interest in bettering their body, it makes them insecure about their own choices and they tend to lash out in response. It is what it is. You can penalize her all you want for it? But it's silly...
I never disagree with you and you are my home girl …but here is from the OP…"My office is having a luncheon at work. What's the occasion you ask? We hired 2 new people. Apparently that's a reason to eat tons and tons of food."
IMO it just comes off a little snotty to just say …oh, we hired to people so its an "excuse" to have a gorge fest….
They probably did it to introduce the new people and make them feel at home in their new work environment…
I agree that plate to the face was BS ….but OP kinda comes off as looking down at people her company for providing "a reason to eat tons and tons of food"…just my thoughts...0 -
I find it interesting that you are willing to look down on them for their food choices (a perfect example would be how you describe the potluck to begin with) but feel very victimized that they were "looking down" on your choices.
I mean, what horrible people you work with, trying to make the new people feel welcomed and creating a social event that will encourage office morale. How terrible that they would want to be sure you were included.
Instead of sitting on your impossibly high pedestal, why didn't you make something *you* approve of and share it, and maybe educate those heathens on the benefits of clean eating?
But hey, I am sure working yourself up into a lathered rage burns way more calories than getting along with the folks at work.
Sorry, but I am not going to pat you on the back for this one.
Whoa hold on there sally sad face... I think this response was a bit over the line.
1. She didn't look down on anyone for their food choices. She DID however prefer to stick to her diet plan... social hour wasn't important to her as staying dedicated to her goals. Nothing wrong with that at all. Not a single word of her post included, "I told them how horrible their food was for me" or "It wasn't food skinny people eat"... She merely stated it was a all you can eat event she wasn't ready to partake in at this point in her plan. Might not have been great wording.. I'll agree to that.. but she has every right to chose what she will and won't eat.
2. She still attended the event to be social. To be disrespectful would have been to avoid the event entirely.
3. She did make something for herself.. that was what she got criticized for. Yet not many people jib the body builder for his/her protein shakes... but try sure do love to harass the girl trying to just lose unwanted weight.
4. She's not raging at all. Just trying to deal with how difficult this is for everyone who is just starting the process. It happens all the time, it's not new to her situation. People are naturally thrown off when others take interest in bettering their body, it makes them insecure about their own choices and they tend to lash out in response. It is what it is. You can penalize her all you want for it? But it's silly...
I never disagree with you and you are my home girl …but here is from the OP…"My office is having a luncheon at work. What's the occasion you ask? We hired 2 new people. Apparently that's a reason to eat tons and tons of food."
IMO it just comes off a little snotty to just say …oh, we hired to people so its an "excuse" to have a gorge fest….
They probably did it to introduce the new people and make them feel at home in their new work environment…
I agree that plate to the face was BS ….but OP kinda comes off as looking down at people her company for providing "a reason to eat tons and tons of food"…just my thoughts...
^^^^0 -
I never disagree with you and you are my home girl …but here is from the OP…"My office is having a luncheon at work. What's the occasion you ask? We hired 2 new people. Apparently that's a reason to eat tons and tons of food."
IMO it just comes off a little snotty to just say …oh, we hired to people so its an "excuse" to have a gorge fest….
They probably did it to introduce the new people and make them feel at home in their new work environment…
I agree that plate to the face was BS ….but OP kinda comes off as looking down at people her company for providing "a reason to eat tons and tons of food"…just my thoughts...
I totally agree with you.. However... her responses after the fact were genuine and none combative. She restated that she didn't mean to come off that way and was only venting, and when they back down? It's only fair the rest of us retract the claws... but these two continued the rampage like rabid dogs on a personal level toward the OP vs. just addressing the overall issue and THAT's where I took justifiable offense.0 -
I just smile and envision cramming my veggie burger up his *kitten*..............................
That may be the only fiber he gets that day.0 -
I never disagree with you and you are my home girl …but here is from the OP…"My office is having a luncheon at work. What's the occasion you ask? We hired 2 new people. Apparently that's a reason to eat tons and tons of food."
IMO it just comes off a little snotty to just say …oh, we hired to people so its an "excuse" to have a gorge fest….
They probably did it to introduce the new people and make them feel at home in their new work environment…
I agree that plate to the face was BS ….but OP kinda comes off as looking down at people her company for providing "a reason to eat tons and tons of food"…just my thoughts...
I totally agree with you.. However... her responses after the fact were genuine and none combative. She restated that she didn't mean to come off that way and was only venting, and when they back down? It's only fair the rest of us retract the claws... but these two continued the rampage like rabid dogs on a personal level toward the OP vs. just addressing the overall issue and THAT's where I took justifiable offense.
agreed…:)0 -
I never disagree with you and you are my home girl …but here is from the OP…"My office is having a luncheon at work. What's the occasion you ask? We hired 2 new people. Apparently that's a reason to eat tons and tons of food."
IMO it just comes off a little snotty to just say …oh, we hired to people so its an "excuse" to have a gorge fest….
They probably did it to introduce the new people and make them feel at home in their new work environment…
I agree that plate to the face was BS ….but OP kinda comes off as looking down at people her company for providing "a reason to eat tons and tons of food"…just my thoughts...
I totally agree with you.. However... her responses after the fact were genuine and none combative. She restated that she didn't mean to come off that way and was only venting, and when they back down? It's only fair the rest of us retract the claws... but these two continued the rampage like rabid dogs on a personal level toward the OP vs. just addressing the overall issue and THAT's where I took justifiable offense.
agreed…:)
;D0 -
since this thread seems to have turned into a dumpster fire I'm going to go back and read the OP and just answer to that straight.0
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^ lol0
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1My office is having a luncheon at work. What's the occasion you ask? We hired 2 new people. Apparently that's a reason to eat tons and tons of food.(1) I brought my lunch, as usual. I don't care to participate in the stuffing-of-faces-until-we-can't-breathe-fest(2). I'm just starting out and am trying really hard to meet my goal. I'm sitting with everyone and chatting like usual, just not eating the food. It doesn't fit into my daily allowance and I'm good with that. Anywho, I get my lunch out of the fridge(3). Let the comments commence....
"That's what you're eating for potluck??" "Yep, I'm good with this."
"Go get in line and get some food!" "Oh no, I'm good, thank you though."
"Why aren't you eating??" "I didn't gain weight eating like THIS, I gained weight eating like THAT."
"She's eating a granola bar!!"
Waving a plate of food in front of my face (literally) "You don't know what you're missing!!" (trying to keep calm and not slap it out of her hand)(4) "Oh yes I do, and I'm good, thanks."
Seriously?? People suck.
Maybe it's a reason to build morale and make sure new people and current employees know one another and get to meet in an informal and comfy way to work well together. I don't remember tons of food being required at these things.
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Kinda judgey
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REALLY curious what your "lunch from the fridge" was. Apparently one of your coworkers thought you weren't even eating.
4
Too emotional a feeling for what was happening. Possible Hangry.0 -
DO slap it out of her hand. That's all it would take, is just one time. No one would ever bother you about food again.
If you get in trouble, claim it was an accident. Dead serious. I don't stand for that kind of crap.0 -
I know exactly where the OP is coming from. When I worked in an office I was not only the biggest woman there, but just about the biggest PERSON. Maybe ten pounds separated me from the biggest man there, and I'm not sure which of us was on the lower side. They were all big on food-laden celebrations, too. Thankfully there were only a few particularly rabid 'food-pushers', and they were mostly well-meaning, equal opportunity pushers, offering treats to anybody and everybody. However their Queen, well, we'll just call her PAB (passive-aggressive *****), made it her life's mission to get me, the one and only fat girl in the whole office, to eat. For almost ten years, it seemed she spent more time lingering in front of my desk pushing one food or another than she did working. Even when she went around offering stuff to others, she'd barely react whether they accepted or refused, but she'd act personally offended if I didn't take something (no, she didn't bake anything herself, she didn't even cook.) Seriously, imagine a 50-something year old woman pouting because you wouldn't take a doughnut.
If I wasn't there, I'd come back to find a big platter of whatever goodies, and she'd claim she'd put them there for "your end of the department.". "No" was just a sound she could not comprehend. If I broke down just to get rid of her and said yes, thank you, she'd actually get this look of smug satisfaction, and then linger around as long as she could to watch me eat it, if she could get away with it. I usually just told her I was saving it for break ("Oh, you don't have to, I'll bring you another one!"). If I held my ground and politely but firmly refused, she'd whisper to people that I was rude, she was just trying to be nice to me and I 'threw it in her face.' Once in a while the visits would die down - I suspected she sometimes got 'spoken to' about her excessive socializing - but lord help me if I had to pass her desk to get to the copy machine. She was also fascinated when I did eat anything, and had to comment on everything that went into my mouth. This was annoying enough even when I wasn't actively trying to diet.
It grew so bad that I dreaded the office social functions and started avoiding them. Which in turn only served to have her ramp up her efforts "I noticed you missed the party so here, I brought you a little" (plunks down a paper plate that is practically dissolving under the weight of the desserts/cheese/whatever.) And it had the added result of then making ME look like a snob to everyone else for not attending.
I guess my point is, we all have our breaking points. And as I read OP's post I just heard PAB's voice and saw her standing over me waving a plate full of food that was tempting enough as it was (even if I already had a few treats in front of me, that would not have satisfied her.) OP was sitting there, minding her own business and bought her own food, so she could participate and socialize with everyone... but those people, who I'm sure are otherwise very nice, wouldn't let up and I think I would have felt the same way she did. Having been there, I applaud her ability to hold it together.
(It ONLY got better when I stopped worrying about being so polite. If she was going to call me "rude" anyway, I decided it was worth it for her to leave me in peace for a while.)0 -
DO slap it out of her hand. That's all it would take, is just one time. No one would ever bother you about food again.
If you get in trouble, claim it was an accident. Dead serious. I don't stand for that kind of crap.
Wow. This is just horrible advice. Advocating violent reactions is not really cool, and though you may "claim" it to be an accident may not end up being seen as such. How about trying the grown up approach of saying No firmly and then ignoring if necessary.0
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