What is your WHY?
MikePXstream
Posts: 965 Member
Hey everyone,
More often than not, I see the same statement come from a lot of people about their fitness journey. "I started up, but then I quite xx amount of days later." Or, " I made it 2-3 months, but couldn't keep up with it." So I started thinking, what is it that keeps people from continuing on? What was it that kept me going on? I read or listened to a small segment by Darren Hardy called Making the shift, I believe that was it, and he touched on the subject of what is it that drives us to pursue something. The main reason, your WHY has to be strong enough.
Imagine that you are on a high rise building and there is a skinny platform about 30 feet long going from your roof top to the building across the way from you. You are asked to cross to the other side. Chances are, you probably don't want to. Now imagine there is a $10 bill on the other side. You might be more tempted, but is it enough to really make you want to do that? Probably not. Now, imagine your child or loved one is in danger on that other side. I'm willing to bet that you are going to do everything you can to get to that side. What changed? Your WHY changed. Crossing a 30 foot platform just for the thrill of it or $10 wasn't a big enough reason why, but a loved in danger might be.
Now, imagine applying that same mindset to your fitness journey and life style change. Is your WHY big enough? I believe one of the reasons why some people don't make it past that few day or couple month period is that there WHY isn't big enough, so the willingness to stick it out and achieve their goal isn't really there.
My why goes beyond wanting to look good in shorts or have 6 pack abs. Mine is to avoid a hereditary disease and live long enough to see my children's children grow up. My family has a history of diabetes. Both great grandparents, my grandfather, mother, and uncle all have or had diabetes. My uncle was just diagnosed a few years ago, and my mother, god bless her, lost the fight a few months back. A couple of years ago I weighed the most I ever had, didn't care what I ate or drank because I assumed I would be one of the lucky ones that the disease skipped. I then realized that was a bad mindset, so I changed it. I made the choice to want to eat better, exercise, and prevent the possibility of contracting diabetes and being insulin dependent. I did not want to leave it up to chance. Sure, I would exercise a little, go for a run here and there, eat something healthier, but my WHY wasn't defined, Therefore I was inconsistent and not really doing myself any favors. So, I changed my WHY.
I understand that at times, life can get in the way and slow us down. An injury, drastic change in your lifestyle routine, but when it boils down it it, your reason will remain the foundation for your success. It doesn't matter if today is your first day or you have been making a lifestyle change for years. Do you truly know why you are exercising? Do you really know why you have chosen to eat a little cleaner? When you understand why it is important to YOU, you are more likely to succeed and stick with it.
I hope this has you thinking a little bit. If so, then what is your WHY?
More often than not, I see the same statement come from a lot of people about their fitness journey. "I started up, but then I quite xx amount of days later." Or, " I made it 2-3 months, but couldn't keep up with it." So I started thinking, what is it that keeps people from continuing on? What was it that kept me going on? I read or listened to a small segment by Darren Hardy called Making the shift, I believe that was it, and he touched on the subject of what is it that drives us to pursue something. The main reason, your WHY has to be strong enough.
Imagine that you are on a high rise building and there is a skinny platform about 30 feet long going from your roof top to the building across the way from you. You are asked to cross to the other side. Chances are, you probably don't want to. Now imagine there is a $10 bill on the other side. You might be more tempted, but is it enough to really make you want to do that? Probably not. Now, imagine your child or loved one is in danger on that other side. I'm willing to bet that you are going to do everything you can to get to that side. What changed? Your WHY changed. Crossing a 30 foot platform just for the thrill of it or $10 wasn't a big enough reason why, but a loved in danger might be.
Now, imagine applying that same mindset to your fitness journey and life style change. Is your WHY big enough? I believe one of the reasons why some people don't make it past that few day or couple month period is that there WHY isn't big enough, so the willingness to stick it out and achieve their goal isn't really there.
My why goes beyond wanting to look good in shorts or have 6 pack abs. Mine is to avoid a hereditary disease and live long enough to see my children's children grow up. My family has a history of diabetes. Both great grandparents, my grandfather, mother, and uncle all have or had diabetes. My uncle was just diagnosed a few years ago, and my mother, god bless her, lost the fight a few months back. A couple of years ago I weighed the most I ever had, didn't care what I ate or drank because I assumed I would be one of the lucky ones that the disease skipped. I then realized that was a bad mindset, so I changed it. I made the choice to want to eat better, exercise, and prevent the possibility of contracting diabetes and being insulin dependent. I did not want to leave it up to chance. Sure, I would exercise a little, go for a run here and there, eat something healthier, but my WHY wasn't defined, Therefore I was inconsistent and not really doing myself any favors. So, I changed my WHY.
I understand that at times, life can get in the way and slow us down. An injury, drastic change in your lifestyle routine, but when it boils down it it, your reason will remain the foundation for your success. It doesn't matter if today is your first day or you have been making a lifestyle change for years. Do you truly know why you are exercising? Do you really know why you have chosen to eat a little cleaner? When you understand why it is important to YOU, you are more likely to succeed and stick with it.
I hope this has you thinking a little bit. If so, then what is your WHY?
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Replies
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• I want to feel better
• I want to go on business trips with coworkers and walk to destinations and not be so red & winded they ask if I need to sit down, with deep concern on their face
• I want to throw away my inhaler
• I want to paint my toe nails without having to wedge myself in the corner of the couch just to reach my feet
• I want to buy jeans at a NORMAL store (and not Lane Bryant)
• I want to feel comfortable in my own skin
But mostly, I want to avoid the medical difficulties that my parents and sister are currently trying desperately to combat, including diabetes, high blood pressure, arthritis and joint deterioration.38 -
Amazing post.
I've been thinking about it for a while as well. My 'WHY' has a lot to do with my own insecurities and social anxieties. I've been using my weight (even though it has been in the normal ranges for about 2-3 years now, before I used to weigh over 95kgs, now around 70kgs at 171cm) as an excuse. Excuse for anything. I'd tell myself that I can't go out, do something, meet someone, just have a normal life because of my weight. I'd tell myself that I can't do this or that because people would laugh at me for being on the chubbier side. I'd make myself believe that I have no chances with the guys I liked because of my weight. And just work myself up to the point of pure terror. I've been trying to change my mindset for so long now, but I seriously didn't have much self-confidence until I took things in my hands and told myself 'Oh, seriously? You can't do those stuff because you are 70+kgs? Alright! We will lose this weight and then you will do everything you've always wanted to do!' - and I am doing all of this. I've grown a lot more confident in all aspects of my life. And just keeping working out, eating on the healthy side, having cut sodas, alcohol and general junk food - it all makes me feel like I can conquer the world. Before I was afraid to make a single step, now there is no stopping me.
So my 'WHY' is me. I want to finally build the life I've always wanted and finally be the person I've always wanted to be.20 -
my why...in all honesty...I got sick of being the fat friend...I got sick of my hip hurting...my confidence level was never the issue but when you get a bunch of women together shopping and you get "those looks" I got sick of it...
Now I am one of the smallest in the group...my hip doesn't hurt and my confidence well is the same...
and no it wasn't to find a man..I got him while I was fat and got fatter after I found him...24 -
10 years and 8 days later my "why" has changed so many times I've lost count.
But for today, my "why" is:
--Fear of gaining the weight back and having to live the boring, sedentary life I was living prior to losing the weight
--Want to continue to be active
--Continue to have the confidence to try new things
--I don't want to have all the ailments and medical problems my mom has due to her weight
--Want to be around to see my three grandsons grow up
--Want to be able to continue to motivate and inspire others, as people did for me10 -
Though I don't have a hereditary challenge, my why is the same as OP's: A screening at work said I was "borderline" for diabetes. That scared me and I started working on changing it. At this point, I weigh less than I have in a long time and will be doing only my 2nd 5K since high school in a month.7
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For me, I want to live long enough to fall in love, get married, and be happy.
I was feeling pretty crumby for quite a while and I came to discover a lot of the "Yuck" was caused by the extra weight and my poor diet.7 -
My WHY is because I don't want my weight to run my life. I want to do something - get a job, go out, plan a vacation, go shopping, spend tim with friends - because of ME, and not make choices based on my insecurity weighing me down. I'm tired of mentally preparing myself for criticism and coming up with rebuttals ("Oh, the 5 lbs is due to the stressful few weeks I've had but it'll come off naturally..." "I have been so busy lately, you know how it is, no time for exercising or eating homemade meals...").
Basically, I realized that:
1. I'm hurting my body
2. I'm hurting my self-confidence
3. I'm not going to be the happiest I can be in the future
...if I keep feeding myself the BS that being overweight and eating CRAP is "fine," "everyone does it," "something I have no control over" etc etc.
The change comes from my MIND. Turning a mindset around like this has been easy some days, and hell other days (I've lived about 10 years of my life trying to convince myself I am powerless before really calling myself out on it...). But I'm still here, and I'm not going anywhere!!! I WANT a good life, I WANT a family, I WANT to do things my way, I WANT health and happiness. And I'll bring down the obstacles in my way because my WHY is a powerful one.
My other WHY is: the beach! Showing off my sexy body :laugh:
Feeling a little emotionally intense now. This is a really good thread, I dug deep.
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My why is because I am fed up-- fed up with being uncomfortable every day in my own skin, and struggling to find clothes to wear every single day that look even mildly decent. I'm fed up with getting winded going up a few flights of stairs and the countless things I tell myself I can't do because of my weight. I'm fed up with the anxiety about what people are thinking about me, or how they are quietly judging me. I'm fed up with aching joints that should not be bothering me at the age of 27. And mostly I'm fed up with wasting the best years of my youth on being inactive, lazy, anxious, and uncomfortable.
19 -
Truthfully my why is I want a baby.
But I want to provide a healthy strong body for my baby to grow in.
I want to be a fit mum not a fat mum.20 -
To feel better, look better, and be healthy.
To avoid diabetes - it runs in my family.
To remove "plus size" from my dating profile.
To fit in an airplane seat without worrying if I'm crowding the person next to me. Well....that might be too much to ask considering the size of those seats. Haha!
*****Most of all*****
I want the great person I am on the inside - to be on the outside too!
I have more...but these are just a few I put on my profile to remind myself.13 -
Great post OP!
My why is listed in my profile as I want to get healthy because I am going to Paris in 2015 but lets face it that is just a timeline goal. I have a million reasons to lose weight and have had them a hundred times over for the last 10 years. Still working on figuring out the one that sticks. I will say that this round seems more on point as I seem to have made a mental switch and just decided that now is the time I lose this weight for me and nobody else. I realize my life will not get magically better by losing weight. That in most ways I will still be the same person. This more about being good to myself. Feeling good about myself and learning to accept me as the person that I really am. (Not sure if this is making sense to anyone else?) Ask me again in a year!
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I love me now.
My mom and I workout together we are closer than ever.
I started a step counting club and its taking off.
Im becoming who i always wanted to be.7 -
Fantastic post! I love this so much!
My whys: I got tired of waking up and hating, absolutely hating, the body I was waking up and living in. Tired of fooling myself into thinking that I don't feel that bad and didn't look that bad. Tired of using food and alcohol as a drug to cure my boredom and my self esteem issues.
Instead, I decided I want to wake up and use my body to surprise myself, find out all of the fantastic things its capable of doing. I wasted the first 15+ years of my adult life being ashamed of it. I want to look in the mirror and realize that while I don't look perfect, and what I see is flawed, it's pretty awesome. I want to have a relationship with food that is about not JUST about enjoyment, but about fueling my body.3 -
I've been thinking about this question a lot this week, and I've come to the conclusion that I just don't know. I've tried and failed to lose weight many, many times in the past. Why is this the time that has worked most effectively? No clue. It could be just a perfect storm of "kids are older and I have more time" + "knowing more athletic people I want to emulate" + "having an app in my pocket that helps me keep track of my food." Or it could be something completely different. I wish I knew so I could use it for other areas of my life!3
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Incredible post.
I was having this discussion with a friend of mine the other day. We are both the same shape/height/weight and were talking about how much we want to be different, better. What struck me the most was that I found myself saying out loud - "I worry about having a heart attack, like all the time. It's depressing. I can't obsess about dying at 41, that's insane".
It is. It's insane that I would put myself though that. So my why, is that I can't LIVE my life if I am obsessing over dying all the time, of a heart attack or a stroke because I am so overweight.
I have two amazing daughters. They are witty and funny and so smart. They are the light and laughter and joy in my life. I really want to have the pleasure and honor of being alive for as long as possible, just so I can be around them.
It's a good why. Thank you for this. Putting it out there is a huge thing.10 -
The WHY. My Why was never big enough, as you explained. My why was always superficial and sad, it was to look good for a boyfriend who hated me anyway, but used my weight gain as his best weapon. My why was to compete with my best friend because I was so jealous she kept going and lost the weight, my why was to feel good again about myself, because I didn't realize that the weight had nothing to do with it, I needed to learn to love myself anyway. And then my Dad died. On May 20th, 2013, my dad died suddenly of complications from a lifelong battle with alcohol addiction. I say sudden because he would never go to a doctor, so we had no idea this was coming, and it did. And my life was turned upside down. The loss of my Dad prompted me to move my family in with my mom who couldn't deal, and I couldn't imagine being far away from his belongings, because it felt like he was still there. Anyway, this loss started me on my path to finding my Why. On July 21st, 2013, I finally looked in the mirror and sought treatment for my own addiction to alcohol and pills. I realized I did not want to drop dead at 54 or any other age, as my father had. I realized that I was killing myself by drinking daily, popping pills, over eating, not exercising, and smoking over 2 packs a day. And I have a beautiful, amazing little girl who needs me, and I need her. I realized I wanted to run and play with her, I want to be a fun grandmother someday, I want her to look up to me as her stability, her rock, her model for health and life. And so with that, I found my WHY. This weight is all that I have left of a life I have left behind. and I want it gone, to shed that baggage to be free of the weight. I walk every single day, and get to the gym when I can. I eat a balanced diet and drink plenty of water. I talk openly with my daughter about the importance of health and go on long bike rides with her. And most importantly, I have not drank or smoked in months, and I couldn't be happier. Sorry for the mile long response, but it is a tough question.13
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I originally started because I needed to lose 60 pounds, and wanted to be able to keep up with the kids, go biking, take up running, quit smoking, etc.
Now I've met all those goals, but I find that MFP is great for helping me maintain my current healthy weight. Plus I like the social aspect of it. I have groups of friends that talk about food options, running and biking tips, etc.
Now I'm training for my first marathon, and it is fun talking to others who are also training.
I get the feeling that if you just use MFP to hit your goals, and then you quit, there is the risk of packing on the pounds again. It takes hard work to get in shape, but it also takes effort to prevent yourself from falling back into the same rut. MFP is doing a great job helping in that respect. Plus the longer I continue to monitor intake and output of calories, the more it will become a habit, so that even if I stop using MFP one day, I'll still subconsciously pay attention to what I'm doing.3 -
Hey everyone,
More often than not, I see the same statement come from a lot of people about their fitness journey. "I started up, but then I quite xx amount of days later." Or, " I made it 2-3 months, but couldn't keep up with it." So I started thinking, what is it that keeps people from continuing on? What was it that kept me going on? I read or listened to a small segment by Darren Hardy called Making the shift, I believe that was it, and he touched on the subject of what is it that drives us to pursue something. The main reason, your WHY has to be strong enough.
Imagine that you are on a high rise building and there is a skinny platform about 30 feet long going from your roof top to the building across the way from you. You are asked to cross to the other side. Chances are, you probably don't want to. Now imagine there is a $10 bill on the other side. You might be more tempted, but is it enough to really make you want to do that? Probably not. Now, imagine your child or loved one is in danger on that other side. I'm willing to bet that you are going to do everything you can to get to that side. What changed? Your WHY changed. Crossing a 30 foot platform just for the thrill of it or $10 wasn't a big enough reason why, but a loved in danger might be.
Now, imagine applying that same mindset to your fitness journey and life style change. Is your WHY big enough? I believe one of the reasons why some people don't make it past that few day or couple month period is that there WHY isn't big enough, so the willingness to stick it out and achieve their goal isn't really there.
My why goes beyond wanting to look good in shorts or have 6 pack abs. Mine is to avoid a hereditary disease and live long enough to see my children's children grow up. My family has a history of diabetes. Both great grandparents, my grandfather, mother, and uncle all have or had diabetes. My uncle was just diagnosed a few years ago, and my mother, god bless her, lost the fight a few months back. A couple of years ago I weighed the most I ever had, didn't care what I ate or drank because I assumed I would be one of the lucky ones that the disease skipped. I then realized that was a bad mindset, so I changed it. I made the choice to want to eat better, exercise, and prevent the possibility of contracting diabetes and being insulin dependent. I did not want to leave it up to chance. Sure, I would exercise a little, go for a run here and there, eat something healthier, but my WHY wasn't defined, Therefore I was inconsistent and not really doing myself any favors. So, I changed my WHY.
I understand that at times, life can get in the way and slow us down. An injury, drastic change in your lifestyle routine, but when it boils down it it, your reason will remain the foundation for your success. It doesn't matter if today is your first day or you have been making a lifestyle change for years. Do you truly know why you are exercising? Do you really know why you have chosen to eat a little cleaner? When you understand why it is important to YOU, you are more likely to succeed and stick with it.
I hope this has you thinking a little bit. If so, then what is your WHY?
This is a truly powerful post. Thank you for sharing it with us. I am sorry about the loss of your mother.
I wish I could save this post to read later on. I needed to hear this.1 -
What a great post - thank-you for asking this question. When I started this new lifestyle in November of 2012 I just wanted to be healthy - or that's what I said outloud. What I really wanted was to not take up so much space. To walk into a room and not be noticed at all instead of being looked at in either disgust or pity and then completely ignored. Literally the elephant in the room.
15 months and 159 pounds later my whys have changed so many times I can't keep track! The list of things that I couldn't do before that I can do now is long and continuously getting longer! Things I didn't even think about. I constantly am dumbfounded by things I CAN do - every exercise class and yoga class I still find myself mentally stopping myself from trying something new "You can't do that!" my brain says. And then I try it - and I can! With ease most of the time!
I look forward to each day. Sounds corny and trite, but it's true. I'm a happier person. My "Why?" now is Why didn't I do this sooner? Why did I live so alone in my head for so long? Why was I so hard on myself for so long? Why did I think food was the answer to everything that went wrong? Why didn't I love myself enough to get some exercise? Why did I think it was going to be so hard to do that I shouldn't ever start? Why didn't someone tell me that 25 years of obesity could be changed in 15 months?
Prior to the visit to my Doctor that began this process my week consisted of 9 hours of sitting at a desk Monday through Friday with at least four trips for fast food and then straight home after work to lay on my couch until bed time. Now I take five hours of fitness classes per week, voice lessons, yoga, swimming, cross country skiing and still have time for weekends away with family and friends and have an amazing husband that has been with me through thick and thin for 27 years. Life is grand. Can't wait to see what happens next!6 -
Fantastic post!!
My WHY --- to live longer without medications. Lose weight, lose medications - plain and simple. I am no longer taking insulin and my oral medication is 1/4 of what it used to be. No BP meds. Can walk up and down stairs without gasping for breath.
This lifestyle I have made is a commitment to the end. Yes I have flaws in the body but the body is looking better each day and feeling even better with less drugs being pumped into it.
Staying in contact through this site with folks who have the same WHYs makes it easier to maintain.1 -
Wow!! Your post has me seriously thinking about my WHY. And you are so right my WHY was not big enough. I would justify everything I ate, how I looked, why I could not get past day three. I woke up one morning and said "I don't want to be fat any more. I would wait til Monday, wait on a friend to go to the gym wait on the weather then I realized that I needed to do it for me even if I did it alone. So that is what I am doing. I still have bad days, but I don't let them turn into bad weeks. I have a little ways to go but I just keep going for me. I love the post thanks!!! My WHY just got a lot bigger.1
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My WHY is because I don't want my husband to bury me because I neglected my body. I want to live a healthy life with him, not just a life with him.
My other WHY is because I want to have a baby, but I know my body is not in any condition to carry a child -- having started at 293 pounds, my pregnancy would have been difficult on me and the baby. And then after the baby is born, I want to be the mom that can play with my child at the park, not just take him/her to the park. I want to ride bikes with my children, not just sit on the porch and watch them.
I have "tried" to lose weight and get healthy before, but I have now come to the realization that I didn't want it badly enough before. You're right....before my WHY wasn't big enough. It is now.....it is more than big enough now.2 -
Bump1
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great post!0
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These are all AWESOME posts. I have read them all so far. Keep them coming. Your WHY just might be someone else's as well or inspire them to dig a little deeper and keep moving forward.1
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Because life is too short to feel crappy.
To me, it is more than weight, it is about feeling good and truly living every day.3 -
Amazing post ...
Ive never really had a problem being overweight. I have always been pretty confident in myself but once I did lose weight in the past I got so much more confidence. When Im not as confident in myself I accept less for myself than I deserve. The more confident I am, the better decisions I make in life... That is my "why" if that makes any sense.0 -
My why is to get myself healthy first and foremost, I come from a family plagued with heart disease, diabetes and cancer.
My biological father was a large man and young (not even 50 yet) when he passed away from the effects of his lifestyle. My mother is a large woman with diabetes, high blood pressure and who knows what else going on. I refuse to be like them and as I get older I see the choices they made and want to prevent myself from taking their path in life.
I also have a goddaughter that I want to be able to be there for as she grows up. I cant imagine missing out on the things that are ahead for her nor do I want her to feel the pain of losing family at a young age which i know all too well.
My selfish side wants to be slender, confident and feel like I did in my early 20's when I ate right and exercised. I let my life get in the way and totally became someone I never ever thought I would be. I didn't even recognize the woman in photos, nor did I understand how my husband (who has been with me since High School) could still love the person I was. I mean he never once told me I had to make this change but has been so supportive in it (even joined me on the journey and has become a healthier person himself) I want to see the me that I was until the last 6 years where I just let go of the life I lived for one where work took over and everything for me went out the window.
I find myself today not at goal yet but with more energy and just overall looking better (skin, nails and hair even look better). My vitals at the doctors appointments have been amazing and just knowing that what I am doing will help keep me here for the long haul makes me never want to go back to the dark place where I would just eat to eat and not care what was going in my body.1 -
my why...in all honesty...I got sick of being the fat friend...I got sick of my hip hurting...my confidence level was never the issue but when you get a bunch of women together shopping and you get "those looks" I got sick of it...
Now I am one of the smallest in the group...my hip doesn't hurt and my confidence well is the same...
and no it wasn't to find a man..I got him while I was fat and got fatter after I found him...
What a great post!
And I could've written this response myself! My hip never hurt but I was always always always the fat friend. In group pictures, I was generally twice the size of the next biggest person. My confidence pretty much sucked and I never went shopping with friends because we weren't shopping in the same stores. Now, although I have a ways to go, I am not always the biggest one in the picture and even in the pictures where I am the bigger friend...I look a hell of a lot better and I have a killer figure.
I met my husband when I was over 300 pounds and topped out at almost 400...so my why wasn't to meet a man...but my man is certainly enjoying his wife's new body!1 -
Serious reason: my mom died. Diabetes-related stroke. I don't want to follow her. My cholesterol, blood pressure, and insulin numbers aren't great, so I need to work on my health if I want to live a long life.
Less-serious reason, but still a legit reason: My favorite Pixies sweatshirt is starting to get too small. I love it more than any article of clothing I've ever owned and I refuse to stop wearing it. Must lose weight for the hoodie.7
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