I will post a funny status a day here
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5/8 Funny status of the day- Nothing's more embarrassing than that pantsless walk to get more toilet paper. I felt like everyone in Wal-Mart was staring at me.0
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Great! I should follow you for these daily chuckles.
BTW, when Miley does it, it's still called Wasted.0 -
OMG!!! You had me peeing :laugh:
Here's one you can use:
I may be fat but your ugly and I can go on a diet.0 -
I particularly like how out of all the racist jokes you could have included, you picked Mexican.0
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Some of these made me laugh out loud!0
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Hysterical!0
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:laugh:0
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Love this! Humor is the great equalizer.0
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I laughed until I cried. Thanks for the laughs!0
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huh? :indifferent:0
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:laugh:0
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huh? :indifferent:
She is going to make ONE joke a day to keep herself motivated.
However the pattern indicates that only about 1 in 15 will be racial. She has already done Mexican so I think we are two weeks away from another one, I for one can't wait to see if it will be Jewish, Blacks, or Polish. OMGOMGOMG, I'm laughing already.0 -
huh? :indifferent:
She is going to make ONE joke a day to keep herself motivated.
However the pattern indicates that only about 1 in 15 will be racial. She has already done Mexican so I think we are two weeks away from another one, I for one can't wait to see if it will be Jewish, Blacks, or Polish. OMGOMGOMG, I'm laughing already.
I'm waiting on the 1 that's funny0 -
Hilarious, my hubs is laughing too. Looking forward to more :laugh:0
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huh? :indifferent:
She is going to make ONE joke a day to keep herself motivated.
However the pattern indicates that only about 1 in 15 will be racial. She has already done Mexican so I think we are two weeks away from another one, I for one can't wait to see if it will be Jewish, Blacks, or Polish. OMGOMGOMG, I'm laughing already.
I'm waiting on the 1 that's funny
I don't think she said that they'd be funny. Only that she would post 1 a day to stay motivated. I don't get how hunting for a bad joke to tell is very motivating?0 -
Hilarious, my hubs is laughing too. Looking forward to more :laugh:
Did you hear the one about the blonde frizzy haired white chick?0 -
huh? :indifferent:
She is going to make ONE joke a day to keep herself motivated.
However the pattern indicates that only about 1 in 15 will be racial. She has already done Mexican so I think we are two weeks away from another one, I for one can't wait to see if it will be Jewish, Blacks, or Polish. OMGOMGOMG, I'm laughing already.
I'm waiting on the 1 that's funny
I don't think she said that they'd be funny. Only that she would post 1 a day to stay motivated. I don't get how hunting for a bad joke to tell is very motivating?
It was to keep me accountable.0 -
Hilarious, my hubs is laughing too. Looking forward to more :laugh:
Did you hear the one about the blonde frizzy haired white chick?
What's that?0 -
To keep me accountable at logging in. I'm already at a 27 day streak and can't wait to hit 90! Here are some of my status' so far:
~ Today was a really bad day. First, my ex got run over by a bus. Then I lost my job as a bus driver.
~ Today I bought cupcakes without sprinkles. Diets are hard!
~ I got gas today for $1.19! Too bad it was from Taco Bell.
~ I hate it when you give someone a sincere compliment on their mustache and then, all of a sudden....she's not your friend anymore.
~ The gym was so crowded today, I had to skip my workout. Luckily, the line at Dunkin Donuts was shorter than usual.
~ You can tell a lot about a females mood just by her hands. For instance if they're holding a gun, she's probably mad.
~ I like to run up and down the street, knocking on people's doors. I call it the "Jehovah's Fitness Program.
~ I used to be afraid to fart in front of my boyfriend. But today I just let it go. He didn't mind. But the people at the funeral weren't too pleased.
~ It's always awkward when u are out in public and run into your ex. Then, u feel obligated to back the car into reverse and run them over again.
~ I'm a terrific housekeeper! Every time I lose a husband, I keep a house.
~ It's always awkward when u are out in public and run into your ex. Then, u feel obligated to back the car into reverse and run them over again.
~ My friend told me that onions are the only food that can make you cry. That was until I hit him in the face with a watermelon.
~ I enjoy a glass of wine each night for its health benefits. The other glasses are for my witty comebacks and flawless dance moves.
~ I hate making plans for the day. Then the word "premeditated" gets thrown around the courtroom.
~ I have a new diet plan...Make all my friends cupcakes. The fatter they get, the thinner I look.
~ I do 5 sit-ups every morning. It may not sound like much, but there's only so many times I can hit the snooze button.
~ I farted at the store today and four people turned around. I felt like I was on "The Voice."
~ When I was little, my parents moved a lot. But luckily, I always found them.
~ Starbucks really isn't that expensive considering how much Victoria's Secret charges per cup.
~ Whenever somebody calls me ugly, I get super sad and hug them because I know how tough life must be for the visually impaired.
~ I tried playing Uno with my Mexican friends, but they kept stealing all my green cards
~ I wear all black to the gym because I'm having a funeral for my fat.
~ When Miley is half-naked and licks a hammer, it's called "art" and "music." When I go to Home Depot and do the same, I'm called "wasted" and told to "leave the premises."
Ya not really diggin' the Mexican jokes but that's just me I guess....
eta: and my whole family but ya...other than that....ya :noway:0 -
Hilarious, my hubs is laughing too. Looking forward to more :laugh:
Did you hear the one about the blonde frizzy haired white chick?0
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