Workplace saboteurs...

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Replies

  • thavoice
    thavoice Posts: 1,329 Member
    Somne is bringing in cookies, cheesecake, and candy 2-3 days a week where I work, and it is common for people to get an order together for lunch at a local bar or restaurant.

    When someone passes it is no big deal. As far as teh sweets......it is pretty easy to say "No thanks" or "I will have one later".

    If you truly want to lose weight, you can and will either work it in your calories, have a much smaller piece, or just not have any.
    I have never judged anyone at any place I worked for passing on sweets, nor have I even heard other employees snicker behind their backs about it.


    All comes down to what I said on the advice thread........STOP MAKING EXCUSES. This stuff happens and the sooner you begin to live with it and controls yourself the better.

    Now..if someone brings fatty cake into a WW meeting then yeah..that is pretty lame! Or even that stupid gym that has a pizza night and tootsie rolls at the front desk. Seems dumb...but you can still use will power
  • weird_me2
    weird_me2 Posts: 716 Member
    Bravo to those of you who are able to fit in certain foods, then call it a day. There are many people who just can't do that. Bravo to those of you who have enough willpower to just say no, some of just just do not have that.

    I have seen so many snarky remarks on so many posts, and almost hear the eyes rolling (ex. "Um, just eat one and fit it in your calories, it's called willpower, try it sometime). I won't be able to be trusted to just have one of anything for a very long time. Try telling an alcoholic to "just have a sip of beer and get over it".

    I am very happy for those of you who are able to control yourselves. If many of us here were able to control ourselves, we wouldn't be here in the first place. Many times it isn't about the donut. It's what the donut "does" to us. It can emotionally medicate many of us, and so 1 donut turns into 5 donuts when we eat it and old feelings of food and emotions come flooding back. And I personally don't want to fit 5, or even 1 donut into my day, because then I'll be hungry later when I can eat 300 less calories, than if I hadn't eaten the donut.

    OP, what I do at work is bring something satisfying to eat in case there are crazy snacks around the office. I have 90 or 100 calorie snacks to eat, and I can say I've been good with not caving into temptation. There was a meeting a couple weeks ago during which a bag of dove chocolates was being passed around. I have a friend who can eat 1 and she is satisfied. I would eat half the bag, and then wallow in self loathing.

    Different strokes for different folks; some will be able to do things in moderation, some will always have to be extremely careful, as the risk of falling back into old habits can be very high.

    Well, there's the fact that alcoholism is a disease... eating one cupcake or a slice of pizza is not. Nobody is intentionally trying to trigger dramatic emotional outbursts by putting a dozen donuts on the break table. If people can't function properly at a work setting, perhaps they should remain at home, safe and sound from the "saboteurs" of the outside world.

    High five.

    Double-High five.

    MAke sure to log your high fives in your exercise. Maybe make some room for another slice of something?
    Just so I get this straight... If I suffer from disordered eating and I compulsively under eat I have a legitimate mental health problem, but if I compulsivley over eat I'm just a lazy whiner. Got it.

    I don't think anyone said that people who compulsively overeat are lazy whiners. That's not the case. It is true, however, that people with all sorts of issues (alcoholism, anorexia, binge eating, etc.) have to learn how to live with their issues and cannot blame others for their failures. We have to accept personal responsibility for our issues and deal with them, not expect others to cater to our "needs".

    Most of the people telling everyone to enjoy the treats in moderation are some of the more successful people on here. They learned from experience that deprivation and saying that they "can't" control themselves usually leads to failure. For people who are compulsive overeaters and binge eaters, they have to learn to detach food from emotions. It can be done and it has been done, but it takes hard work and it's about so much more than just the food. People who just avoid their triggers are probably going to fail in the end because there will always be triggers around and the day will come where they stop avoiding them and give in. If you don't learn to have a healthy relationship with food and you keep saying you "can't" control yourself, then you will probably lose control at some point.

    I know this from experience. I struggle with binge eating. I still fail sometimes. I don't begrudge the people at work for bringing in food and I don't worry about nit picking. I've done a lot of work to have a healthier relationship with food and I am mostly at a point where I recognize my urges and know how to keep them from getting out of control. This comes from years of working on my mental health. I realize that my problems with food are a mental struggle, but they are my mental struggle and I blame no one when I fail.

    Someone brought donuts on Monday, we had a food day on Wednesday, and someone else brought cake today. I avoided the donuts because donuts are not a favorite of mine. I participated in the food day and brought a fairly healthy dish and indulged in some homemade cheesecake on Wednesday. I plan on having a piece of cake with lots of frosting today and I'm getting Jimmy John's for lunch. I haven't had the urge to binge at all all week because I didn't feel like I was being deprived and I have learned to make reasonable food choices based on my nutritional needs and my taste preferences, not based on how I'm feeling at the moment.
  • levitateme
    levitateme Posts: 1,001 Member
    I don't really like the term "sabotage" for this type of thing because no one is trying to derail your progress. You are responsible for the choices you make at work.

    ^ This. You do not HAVE TO accept the food. :)

    Exactly. My job has free candy, cake, bagels and lunches all the time. I either have a reasonable portion or I say "no thanks, I brought lunch today."

    The end.

    ETA: Just saw all the ED related arguing on the page prior to this. I have had BED since I was a small child. I have developed a healthy relationship with food and have not binged since before Christmas 2013. Stop calling yourselves "addicts." BED is a compulsive mental condition that can be reversed/overcome. You just have to want to overcome it.
  • allbarrett
    allbarrett Posts: 159 Member
    How awful. People are trying to be generous and kind and bringing in food that they enjoy in the hopes that their colleagues enjoy it too. What terrible people. How could they be so rude and unthinking as to try to do something nice for the people they spend 8-12 hours per day with, 5-6 days per week.

    Really?

    This isn't sabotage, this is called "being generous". When it is your turn to bring in the treats, bring something you like (healthy, low cal, whatever), but when it is someone else doing the treating, accept that it isn't going to necessarily match your tastes.
  • missdibs1
    missdibs1 Posts: 1,092 Member
    YES! i love my coworkers but dept lunches etc can ruin my log If you are politley honest though they will work wioth you (no pun intended) I now get prior notice so I can plan accordingly etc
  • Diesel_Girl
    Diesel_Girl Posts: 39
    Do what I do, say "no thanks, I'm on a gluten free diet". Most people don't have a clue what gluten is. I've gotten out of so many less than great food choices this way. But once the public is more informed on gluten, this may not work. But I figure i'll have time to come up with something else before then,. :laugh:

    It would be great if even the people ON a gluten free diet knew what gluten was LOL:

    http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2014/05/06/gluten-free-people-have-no-idea-what-gluten-is_n_5273980.html?ir=Comedy

    So dang true!! :laugh:
  • koosorlose
    koosorlose Posts: 186
    I walked into the break room today and found Little Caesar's pizza, and a sign that said "Ice cream is in the freezer, help yourself!" with a scoop and bowls next to it. While all of these treats are very kind, I can't eat them!!! And temptation makes it THAT much harder to stay away! Not to mention, I loooooooove junk food, especially pizza and ice cream! Whyyyyyyyyyyyy!?!!?!!?!!?!!!!?!!!
  • blytheandbonnie
    blytheandbonnie Posts: 3,275 Member
    I just wanted to add that I understand that my emotional problems with food are my problem. I also don't believe that people trying to share food is directly aimed at me, or trying to sabotage me. What I don't like is people seeming flippant about other's struggles with compulsive eating and saying basically 'Oh, get over it." like it is nothing. To me, it sounded as if the OP was having a small pity party (which we ALL do sometimes over one thing or another) and was lamenting the difficulties of having to resisit temptaion every day. It's hard. For some it's harder than for others. A little understanding goes a long way. I'm going through a depressive episode myself at the moment and food is my self-medication of choice. My problem? Yes, definitely. Do I need someone to imply that I need to just suck it up? No. Especially not right now. For what it's worth, I'm not angry or butt hurt or anything like that, I'm just stating how I feel.
  • gostumpy
    gostumpy Posts: 156 Member
    My coworker 'got you a treat' on the phone, and showed up with a mcdouble & a junior chicken...Very nice gesture, but what he didn't know is that I already had my lunch allotment, and I would be eating my dinner at 1pm!

    Oh well, ate them anyway :(
  • Bernadette60614
    Bernadette60614 Posts: 734 Member
    I think all people really want is for you to 1) thank them for bringing something in 2) tell them how delicious it was. Take a bite, say you have to get back to work, and then bury it in your trashcan.

    Or, you could just bring some healthy options. I like air popped popcorn,and if you have a microwave in your office, you can always have that available.
  • psych101
    psych101 Posts: 1,843 Member
    Man...I feel like my workplace must really suck - no one brings anyone food! I kinda want someone to bring me chocolate now :ohwell:
  • acpgee
    acpgee Posts: 6,658 Member
    My workplace has a dreadful food culture. Lots of junk food treats lying on top of filing cabinets everywhere.

    Today I spotted Toblerone Mini's, Smarties, Kettle Chips, a bar of dark chocolate, Skittles, Haribo gummy candy, Malteasers, Doritos, custard filled doughnuts, eclairs, and two cakes. One was labellled "Death By Chocolate" and the other was a Victoria Sponge.

    We have cake and cookies to mark any occasion. Birthday, birthday of offspring, going on leave, returning from vacation, project completed on time, even resignations. I mean really. Resignation cake?

    I work one day remotely from home and am always amused by the emails inviting me to help myself to treats lying around the office.
  • Beckilovespizza
    Beckilovespizza Posts: 334 Member
    My workplace has a dreadful food culture. Lots of junk food treats lying on top of filing cabinets everywhere.

    Today I spotted Toblerone Mini's, Smarties, Kettle Chips, a bar of dark chocolate, Skittles, Haribo gummy candy, Malteasers, Doritos, custard filled doughnuts, eclairs, and two cakes. One was labellled "Death By Chocolate" and the other was a Victoria Sponge.

    We have cake and cookies to mark any occasion. Birthday, birthday of offspring, going on leave, returning from vacation, project completed on time, even resignations. I mean really. Resignation cake?

    I work one day remotely from home and am always amused by the emails inviting me to help myself to treats lying around the office.


    Mmmmm.... Resignation cake.... U wanna try the I've Been Fired Brownies, they are delish!
  • svelt123
    svelt123 Posts: 173 Member
    :bigsmile: What I have learned to do over the years, I bring in a healthy alternative for everyone to enjoy. I place it next to whatever junk food or temptation food. Or I will just bring something healthy for myself. When anyone asks why am I not having cake etc.
    I just say that my stomach just cannot handle that kind of food today. Or I will say. I have already eaten. (which is true) Or I just say gee it looks good but I will have to pass on that today. Never say that You are counting your calories. Or that you are watching what you eat. (Believe me. someone will try to sabotage your efforts) :grumble:
  • TRD66
    TRD66 Posts: 310 Member
    This was one of the very first steps I took. Well meaning colleagues bringing in sweets and home-made cakes etc. Friday treats from the 'goody cupboard', etc.

    It's cold turkey, honestly. There's none of this, "I'll just have one" or "just a wee bit of cake", so I cut it all out. No communal treats allowed.

    Now I'm not saying it wasn't easy, 'coz It wasn't - but after a while you hardly even notice they are there. And to combat that I can go and buy myself a treat if I want one.

    It's tough, but you either need to fit them into your day, or cut them out.
  • NidiaG24
    NidiaG24 Posts: 31 Member
    Temptation or not, if you want a treat, you make it work. Skip breakfast or dinner. Heck, I had a piece of pie this morning for my coworkers birthday. And I am having another one now because CHOCLATE PIE!!!! It's all a matter of training yourself to be responsible for your choices.

    This smart person is right. It's just a matter of smarts.
  • Not2Quit
    Not2Quit Posts: 2
    I take a little bit and move away. The longer I am around it the better chances that I will eat more.
  • ihateroses
    ihateroses Posts: 893 Member
    It wouldn't be a big deal if it was just temptation. It does seem as soon as you refuse a treat you are the topic of conversation....and if you refuse it because you are trying to eat better it's apparently a total insult to the people eating it.

    So yeah, it's only annoying when people make a big deal out of it, on either side. If I say no to cake, it doesn't mean I don't eat cake or that it's your cue to talk about how it wont kill you.
  • onandoff
    onandoff Posts: 122 Member
    When reading posts about this habit of gathering together at the workplace and eating food makes me appreaciate more I work in a small company where there's no such thing.
    Couldn't this be replaced somehow? Like instead of staying together for 2 hours while eating and talking, better get a training session with the whole team and sweat -the previous workplace meal- out, or maybe some outdoor teambuilding activities?
    It would be much easier for everyone. Coworkers or family, is always difficult in some degree if they're not on board with healthier choices.
  • TRD66
    TRD66 Posts: 310 Member
    Couldn't this be replaced somehow? Like instead of staying together for 2 hours while eating and talking, better get a training session with the whole team and sweat -the previous workplace meal- out, or maybe some outdoor teambuilding activities?


    I think this is a great idea - honestly. I can't wait to see their faces when I suggest this the next time someone pipes up with "what about a wee team lunch - for a treat". :devil: (Honestly, why didn't I think of this before!!)