Weightloss doesn't always lead to happiness.
Replies
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With every procedure a patient signs off on possible repercussions and scenarios that may happen after surgery. I'm more than sure that many of them took it quite seriously since the actually surgery itself can be life threatening due to not waking up and complication of sustaining them during anesthesia.So is he only considering working out now? Did he just lose the weight purely through the calorie deficit caused by the gastric band?
I don't know that much about the procedure but when its a choice between it or someone running a high risk of weight related death. I can totally get why they'd do it.
However I would have assumed they would be clearly made aware of the repercussions i.e rapid weight loss possibly leading to excess loose skin, severe loss of muscle, stomach complaints, fatigue, and other related issues. Are they not advised to incorporate strength training/cardio/nutritional supplements and undergo psychological support?
Genuine questions btw as I really wouldn't know.
This particular gentleman went through the after program, but struggled because also at that time, he decided to have knee surgery (complete knee replacement) which hampered him from trying to physically get around. Combine the surgery with rapid weight loss and I can see how he dreaded wanted to move around as he was getting weaker.
I believe I can truly help him and create a confidence that he needs to get back his life back in a better way.
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Been in fitness industry for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition0 -
anything done without a bigger reason can be very pointless.
i know people that pursue advanced degrees because it's what their parents want, or it's what society says you're supposed to do, or because you think it'll lead to a higher paying job. but if it's not something that you're happy doing, then you won't be happy when it's done.
^^Totally this.
I guess for some people their excess weight is the most visible manifestation of what makes them different, so they figure if they fix that they'll feel more comfortable/happy in themselves. The bigger reason thing is so important both to get you there and to keep you whole as a person.0 -
I should have stated his height. He's 6'5". At 240, he's hardly obese anymore. And most of the excess weight seems to be loose skin.While this can be the case, absolutely, I don't think using the example of someone who got weight loss surgery and just went from morbidly obese to still obese is the best example to uphold here as a cautionary tale.
A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
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Weight loss does not lead to happiness, it leads to physical health. During your weight loss journey you must also look at the underlying causes of your obesity. If you ate due to unhappiness, then the time to address it is while you are on the journey, not afterwards. I learned this lesson the hard way when I lost a lot of weight 13 years ago only to regain it all plus some because I wasn't magically happier or more successful.0
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Healthy, sustainable, planned and maintained seems to be the moral here. I'm already 1000x happier and in reality I'm only on the first few steps towards healthy me. I haven't heard all good things about these bypasses and they usually come from a fear of death rather than a conscious decision to be healthy in mind and body.
Just to clarify I ate because I loved food too much, not because I was unhappy or had a traumatic life etc etc etc. My sole reason was I didn't know restraint until now.0 -
For me, being obese turned out to be a symptom of, rather than a cause of, my general unhappiness.
When it clicked for me that I was responsible for my own health care, and that I was worth being healthy, then the weight loss started to become a side effect, rather than a goal unto itself.
Yes, I still count pounds, and the entire weight-loss industry is geared around numbers, pounds, calories and other quantitative results.
But I now know (and act like) my self-worth is reflected in the way I treat my body.0 -
Again not always true. Look at people on the Biggest Loser. They lost their weight through natural diet and exercise. Yet, 90% of them have gained back a significant amount of weight. And there have been a couple of articles now from former contestants no longer under breach of contract (they couldn't write of what went on during their time on the show for a period of time) who are now ridiculing how it went for them.It seems this story is more about the pitfalls of the gastric bypass. If he had lost the weight through diet and exercise, he'd be much happier & healthier.
I've worked with people who did 180 on their diets, and lost weight and exercised to do it. They looked great and then a few months later they had gained back a significant amount. The usual response was " dieting and exercise became a dread after awhile and I missed having fun at parties and get togethers eating and drinking whatever I felt before. It's either stay lean and fit, or not for me."
A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
IDEA Fitness member
Kickboxing Certified Instructor
Been in fitness industry for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition0 -
Having had a Gastric Bypass myself a number of years ago, the initial phase of it is extremely draining and tiring as your body is effectively eating itself to survive. I thankfully was not the kind of person who thought that losing weight was the solution to everything. I wouldn't say I even had problems to be unhappy about, I couldn't lose the weight and was extremely lucky at the time to be very healthy.
However I felt if I didn't ditch the weight this wouldn't continue. I lost over 100lbs and now have more to go, it can kind of hinder the loss after the initial year or so but its a lot easier to exercise now and I am more informed on nutrition etc.
I do feel a lot of people approaching weight loss weather via surgery or working it off feel that once the weight is gone that all their problems will be solved. I think these are the people who need to sort out the problems in their heads before starting anything.
I'm perfectly happy in life and the rapid weight loss though tough at the time was a big help for me in persuing other things in life. Hopefully the OP's client will turn around and make the most of what he's gone through and improve0 -
I think that to go a total body transformation you also have to work on your mental state. Confidence and self-worth does not come with a set weight. You have to take small steps and like yourself. I think that struggle to accepting yourself can be just as hard as losing weight.0
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100% agree here. It still takes commitment AFTER one loses weight and some don't do very well after they reach their goal. While they may have attained it through hard work and dedication to reaching it, they may not have that same mentality when they get there. And for some, that's more stressing then just being overweight.True, and not just for people with surgical weightloss. Anyone can lose weight and still not feel happy.
A lot of factors contribute to happiness in your life. Weight is one of them, it can be a big or small one. But it's just one factor. I lost a lot of weight with MFP. But daily life is still the same. You still have pressures at work, you still have family obligations. And now you've added in a regular committment to fitness, which can both make you feel wonderful and totally exhaust you. Did your run time improve? Are you lifting more and with good form? Still got that diet in check? A lot of the time it just feels like I added on a whole new set of pressures in my life.
But every now and then you get to do something you'd never have been able to do before, and that's a nice feeling. Really that's about it. It's not as life changing as a lot of people think. One thing it's definitely not is a feeling of constant joy and bliss. I worry about people who seem to think that's the case.
A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
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Kickboxing Certified Instructor
Been in fitness industry for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition0 -
Being fat didn't make me an unhappy person, but being slimmer definitely helped make me a happier one.
This. I definitely feel better, more confident and yes, happier now that I am at a normal weight. Granted, I never was obese, but I was overweight and this affected my mood and self-confidence.0 -
For me, being obese turned out to be a symptom of, rather than a cause of, my general unhappiness.
When it clicked for me that I was responsible for my own health care, and that I was worth being healthy, then the weight loss started to become a side effect, rather than a goal unto itself.
Yes, I still count pounds, and the entire weight-loss industry is geared around numbers, pounds, calories and other quantitative results.
But I now know (and act like) my self-worth is reflected in the way I treat my body.
Whoa.I have to jump in here real quick to say congratulations on your amazing progress. 222 lbs in a year is phenomenal. You truly look like a different person. Good for you for the mental as well as physical transformation.0 -
It seems this story is more about the pitfalls of the gastric bypass. If he had lost the weight through diet and exercise, he'd be much happier & healthier.
I agree -- to me this story is more of a cautionary tale about weight loss surgery than anything else.
But -- I do think there is an important message here, too. Anyone can lose weight and still feel very unhappy with themselves and it won't dissolve most of life's problems. It can help with many problems and even eliminate some (especially medical issues related to weight). But I believe that too many people have come to view weight loss as a cure-all and it's portrayed in weight loss advertisements as this absolutely magical thing, when it's really not.0 -
This is what happens when you treat symptoms of problems and not the cause of them. Obesity and weight loss occurs mainly between our ears in the mysterious neural networks of electrochemical impulses that dictate our limbic, endocrine and metabolic systems. Unless the psychosocial causes of obesity are addressed you will forever be chasing symptoms.
Sure, you can oversimply and say its only a matter of calories in versus calories out. That is important, but we are not robots. We are human with all the messy emotions that goes with it. Its more than understanding human metabolism.
I had to hoe two rows during my weight loss. One dug into my psyche to cultivate a better self-esteem. The other dug into the fat. In my not-so humble opinion one will only really succeed when they address both emotional and physical issues.
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I think a lot of people have gastric bands because they're too lazy to exercise the weight off.When you've dieted and worked hard to lose weight you'll appreciate it more.It's not just about losing the weight but changing your lifestyle as well0
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Point is that if one thinks that being leaner and smaller is all it's gonna take to make one happy, that always isn't the case. For some, it comes at a price especially when trying to lose weight TOO FAST.
This is the BLUF (Bottom Line Up Front) I took from your entire statement.
However, every situation is unique in itself. Where your client may not be happy because of the loss of strength and production, a good fitness regime and healthy eating will help him regain strength/stability and improve his mental health. All is not lost and although you may have your work cut out for you, this is a job worth doing for your client as you try to develop a strong relationship built on encouragement, trust, and enforcing sustainable healthy habits.0 -
I think a lot of people have gastric bands because they're too lazy to exercise the weight off.When you've dieted and worked hard to lose weight you'll appreciate it more.It's not just about losing the weight but changing your lifestyle as well
It is hard for me to place judgement on this when there are so many morbid obese people who there seem to be no other way.0 -
Most of your comments on this I can concurr with but this one I cannot. For many of us the old adiage that only you can make you happy rings true in our heads but there are those with chemical issues that does not equate to the same. It has been shown that lack of fitness leads to depression and chemical embalances do the same. So, in your head you may believe this but science says different.
The funny thing about happiness is this...only you can make yourself happy...external factors can aid in that but in reality weight loss, money, partner etc does not make you happy. That is an internal thing.0 -
I think a lot of people have gastric bands because they're too lazy to exercise the weight off.When you've dieted and worked hard to lose weight you'll appreciate it more.It's not just about losing the weight but changing your lifestyle as well
It is hard for me to place judgement on this when there are so many morbid obese people who there seem to be no other way.
Totally agree with cparter. Saying someone is just too lazy oversimplifies the issue. I _could_ say the issue is complex and that some people are just too lazy to try and understand but again, that would be oversimplifying. I would prefer to not be condescending and unhelpful.0 -
Thats why I decided against gastric bypass or the lap band. Everyone I know who has had it done is more sickly now than when they were heavy. I am really glad I have been able to get as far as I have and hopefully even further!! I have learned more with this journey than I ever have and I appreciate it.
This goes for people who lose weight with natural measures as well, not just surgery. If you restrict or go to extreme measures, it will just creep back. I want this gone for good. People always make fun of me because I am always eating. "Geeeeez you will gain that weight back if you arent careful. You are always shoving food in your mouth!!' What they dont realize is I am shoving in a protein bar, not a cheeseburger ( still do have them, but not NEAR as often). And yes I eat food in front of people now instead of alone in my car!!!!! I like the fact that I will have to change nothing I do once I get to my goal. The way I am living now is how I will live forever and it wont be difficult to do!!!!!0 -
From my experience - people should focus on getting happier before (or during) losing weight.
Ninerbuff is right, weight loss does not necessarily help you be happier. But I feel very strongly that getting happier will help your weight loss.0 -
I think a lot of people have gastric bands because they're too lazy to exercise the weight off.When you've dieted and worked hard to lose weight you'll appreciate it more.It's not just about losing the weight but changing your lifestyle as well
It is hard for me to place judgement on this when there are so many morbid obese people who there seem to be no other way.
Even morbidly obese people can do gentle exercise until they get to a level where they can change up a gear.Too many people want a quick fix without having to put the work in,but putting the work in also installs discipline and all the other things needed to keep the weight off for good.Having an op you're not being educated on nutrition/exercise.You get what you work for imo0 -
Thats why I decided against gastric bypass or the lap band. Everyone I know who has had it done is more sickly now than when they were heavy. I am really glad I have been able to get as far as I have and hopefully even further!! I have learned more with this journey than I ever have and I appreciate it.
^^^ Exactly0 -
Have been through the exact same conversation with a friend and his wife who both had gastric bypass surgery. They were hoping to save their marriage by losing the weight together, supporting one another, etc. They are still married, but found the same things... they were depressed and miserable for quite some time after the surgery and subsequent extreme weight loss in a small time frame. So, it didn't work to save their marriage and they had even more problems on top of what was already going on. Of course, all that led them to seek counseling together and individually for marriage and weight loss stuff. That's what kept them together... funny how life works like that.
I've been through the same though I didn't lose a ton of weight all at once. When your body changes and you can look in the mirror seeing a drastically different version of yourself, it can be unnerving! For a time, I thought that I was much happier and more confident when I was 450 lbs. The brain tricks you that way though... I've heard that over time (many years) that you tend to let go of the minor 'bad' stuff and only tend to remember the mostly good stuff. So, I had forgotten how many times in the past when I was that heavy that I was downright miserable. I only remembered the times when I felt good about myself and I compared 'then' to 'now'. Apples to oranges on that comparison. Gotta focus on what's right in front of you some days and take a good dose of personal perspective.0 -
Happiness truly has to come from within ones self. I'm sure you'll be able to help this man build some muscle and get healthy :-)0
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I think a lot of people have gastric bands because they're too lazy to exercise the weight off.When you've dieted and worked hard to lose weight you'll appreciate it more.It's not just about losing the weight but changing your lifestyle as well
It is hard for me to place judgement on this when there are so many morbid obese people who there seem to be no other way.
Totally agree with cparter. Saying someone is just too lazy oversimplifies the issue. I _could_ say the issue is complex and that some people are just too lazy to try and understand but again, that would be oversimplifying. I would prefer to not be condescending and unhelpful.
I'm more than willing to help anyone who's willing to put the work in0 -
Most of your comments on this I can concurr with but this one I cannot. For many of us the old adiage that only you can make you happy rings true in our heads but there are those with chemical issues that does not equate to the same. It has been shown that lack of fitness leads to depression and chemical embalances do the same. So, in your head you may believe this but science says different.
The funny thing about happiness is this...only you can make yourself happy...external factors can aid in that but in reality weight loss, money, partner etc does not make you happy. That is an internal thing.
This really doesn't change her point. Some people require medication for their depression or other mental disorders. This medication doesn't make people happy, it just helps them not be depressed. It's the same with exercise. Exercise alleviates some of the symptoms of depression, but in itself, it does not make you happy. Although depression = unhappiness, absence of depression =/= happiness. These things (medication, exercise, etc.) just give people the opportunity to be happy. Given that opportunity, it's still an inside job.0 -
I think a lot of people have gastric bands because they're too lazy to exercise the weight off.When you've dieted and worked hard to lose weight you'll appreciate it more.It's not just about losing the weight but changing your lifestyle as well
It is hard for me to place judgement on this when there are so many morbid obese people who there seem to be no other way.
Even morbidly obese people can do gentle exercise until they get to a level where they can change up a gear.Too many people want a quick fix without having to put the work in,but putting the work in also installs discipline and all the other things needed to keep the weight off for good.Having an op you're not being educated on nutrition/exercise.You get what you work for imo
I started Crossfit when I was 250 pounds ( I am 5'2, so 250 pounds on me is NOT GOOOOOOD!!!! It sucked and it hurt, but I stuck with it and it became a catalyst for the 70 pounds I have lost!!! You totally get what you work for!!!!0 -
You bring up a great point. This is why I think weight loss should be a gradual thing, because (drastic) change can be hard to accept. Also, you have to work on the mind as well, not only focusing on the physical aspects.0
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I think a lot of people have gastric bands because they're too lazy to exercise the weight off.When you've dieted and worked hard to lose weight you'll appreciate it more.It's not just about losing the weight but changing your lifestyle as well
It is hard for me to place judgement on this when there are so many morbid obese people who there seem to be no other way.
Even morbidly obese people can do gentle exercise until they get to a level where they can change up a gear.Too many people want a quick fix without having to put the work in,but putting the work in also installs discipline and all the other things needed to keep the weight off for good.Having an op you're not being educated on nutrition/exercise.You get what you work for imo
I started Crossfit when I was 250 pounds ( I am 5'2, so 250 pounds on me is NOT GOOOOOOD!!!! It sucked and it hurt, but I stuck with it and it became a catalyst for the 70 pounds I have lost!!! You totally get what you work for!!!!
I've got maximum respect for you.It's not easy which is why so many people fail.Good work0
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