Should I be offended? (Pt 2)

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Replies

  • seltzermint555
    seltzermint555 Posts: 10,740 Member
    OMG.

    That is beyond weird.

    I have a feeling this guy is going to dig his own grave, sooner or later. People like that typically do.

    But I am also really glad that you were so assertive and direct, that's gonna set you up for a much easier time in your career IMO. Well done!!
  • k_nicole87
    k_nicole87 Posts: 407 Member
    So it is unacceptable to openly fart in someone else's office or in the general population?

    One of my clients farts so bad every single time she comes in to take a pee test. She always apologizes. But hey, we're in the bathroom so I figure it's her domain.
    Are you by any chance a Probation/Parole officer??

    Yep. Watching people pee fills my days with joy.
  • crazymama2both
    crazymama2both Posts: 195 Member
    im dying. that conversation sounds like one that i would have...

    i have a farter here in my office. AND he flosses his teeth while he walks around the office as well...im so freakin' confused and horrified...

    oh, and the one time i DID go into his office he didnt know i was there casue his back was to me WHILE FLOSSING HIS TEETH and he farted and he caught me before i could back out. we both just stared at each other with his hands frozen in mid-floss. the only thing i was grateful for? that little pieces of *kitten* in his teeth didnt come out as he turned around.

    i can't remember wtf it was that i said but ill tell you this; i never will enter his office again and now id like to thank you for reminding me of that gem of a moment. oy! :flowerforyou:
  • MuscleAndMascara
    MuscleAndMascara Posts: 1,260 Member
    Laughing so hard rite now my boss just walked up to my desk... ooops!!:laugh: :laugh: :laugh:
  • Poods71
    Poods71 Posts: 502 Member
    This is the funniest thing I have read in a long time :laugh: . He probably didn't say anything cos he thought if he didn't mention it you could both pretend it didn't happen and he got angry cos you brought it up and he felt embarrassed lol.

    There was a guy in my work who used to come into my office and fart quite blatantly and not pretend he hadn't done it either, so I started spraying deoderant directly onto his behind. He did not like that one bit and after a few times of doing that and him complaining that he smelled like a girl and complaining about the white mark it left on his trousers he stopped doing it :bigsmile:
  • Galatea_Stone
    Galatea_Stone Posts: 2,037 Member
    Fart guy is the new employee, right?

    He won't last. Avoid walking over to his building, ignore him. If he comes near you, tell him he makes you feel uncomfortable and you'd appreciate it if he kept outside of farting distance until he learns some manners.
  • JG762
    JG762 Posts: 571 Member
    I swear to God I learn something new every day here...
    I had no idea that when I fart that I have to give someone a doughnut.... man I owe somebody a lot of doughnuts.
  • crazymama2both
    crazymama2both Posts: 195 Member
    PS i printed out your conversation and gave it to my coworker who is also assaulted by the office farter. you made our day. thank you.
  • skippygirlsmom
    skippygirlsmom Posts: 4,433 Member
    I made an excuse to walk over to his building and drop off some supplies. I chatted with another sales rep, asking casually how Jeff was doing in his new position. The guy replied, "He is weird as f#@k.". Obviously I was not surprised. So I made my way to Jeff's office, and knocked on the door. He told me to come in.

    "Hey Jeff, I wanted to say thank you for the donut. Did you have some left over from national donut day?"

    "No."

    "Okay... Why did you give only me one?"

    "Because you like them."

    Now get this, I have never told him I like donuts. How does he know that?

    "Well thank you. I have something to ask you."

    "Yeah?"

    "Why did you fart in my office? Why didn't you say anything? Is that why you gave me the donut?"

    HE LOOKED ME DEAD IN THE EYES AND SAID

    "I never farted in your office."

    "Yes. You did."

    "No, no I didn't."

    "You farted Jeff, you farted and stared me right in the eyes and farted. No apology. And your donut doesn't make it okay."

    Not sure why, but at this point I was really pissed off. Why fart and not even be honest? It isn't like I can imagine smells!

    "Oh, yeah. That. Yeah. I farted."

    "Why did you look at me while you did it? Why didn't you say anything?"

    "I don't know, I didn't think you were policing my farts."

    "Well, please bring air freshener next time, or use the restroom twenty feet away from my office."

    Then he has this little attitude.

    "I will fart where and when I want to."

    "Don't fart in my office."

    "Okay, I'll fart outside your door."

    "What is wrong with you?"

    "Nothing. Don't tell me how to fart."

    Then, can't even make this up, he tried to get up and give me a hug.

    I walked out of there and sat at my desk, still utterly confused. I may have met the wierdest f&*%ing person on the entire planet. What do I do now? I don't even know.

    Based on this conversation I believe I used to work with this guy OMG what a jerk.
  • Laughing so hard rite now my boss just walked up to my desk... ooops!!:laugh: :laugh: :laugh:

    lol! you didn't fart did you?
  • hellokathy
    hellokathy Posts: 540 Member
    Oh god, I am so sorry you have to deal with this but this is about the funniest office story I've ever heard. I have no idea what he looks like but I imagined him like the Alan guy from the Hangover movies and that only made it funnier.

    I'm sorry, I have no suggestion how to handle this. I can't even imagine people like him exist, so I have no idea how I'd deal with them.
  • Hophead43
    Hophead43 Posts: 1,634 Member
    So it is unacceptable to openly fart in someone else's office or in the general population?

    One of my clients farts so bad every single time she comes in to take a pee test. She always apologizes. But hey, we're in the bathroom so I figure it's her domain.
    Are you by any chance a Probation/Parole officer??

    Yep. Watching people pee fills my days with joy.
    My girlfriend does the same!! I get the craziest stories from her.
  • Hophead43
    Hophead43 Posts: 1,634 Member
    Step brothers fart scene is eerily similar.
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-AMgagxCvZQ

    I love that movie!! To many great scenes!!
  • branflakes1980
    branflakes1980 Posts: 2,516 Member
    Well Holy Hell, part 2 is even better than part 1... This has officially made my day!!
    rofling.gif
  • iceey
    iceey Posts: 354 Member
    I'm in HR and I have no idea what I would do if you came to me to complain and I had to deal with Jeff.

    After laughing uncontrollably for several minutes, I would have to put on serious face and go give Jeff a talking-to:

    "Don't fart in front of your co-workers." How could I even keep a straight face??
  • Pirate_chick
    Pirate_chick Posts: 1,216 Member
    I'm in HR and I have no idea what I would do if you came to me to complain and I had to deal with Jeff.

    After laughing uncontrollably for several minutes, I would have to put on serious face and go give Jeff a talking-to:

    "Don't fart in front of your co-workers." How could I even keep a straight face??

    No idea, because I couldn't keep a straight face reading this. :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:
  • Monkey_Business
    Monkey_Business Posts: 1,800 Member
    OMG.

    That is beyond weird.

    I have a feeling this guy is going to dig his own grave, sooner or later. People like that typically do.

    But I am also really glad that you were so assertive and direct, that's gonna set you up for a much easier time in your career IMO. Well done!!

    While I do agree that farty pants Jeff most likely made a bad choice in making you a victim, you might want to consider documenting this incident. If additional harassment comes down the road you may need this documentation to show a pattern of behavior to your HR.

    You did do the right thing by confronting him, but he may feel that since him and your husband are freinds, it allows him to mistreat you. What if next time he does something like this with one of your customers around?

    Just one old man's opinion..........

    Oh and yes I do have a sense of humor and found this extremely entertaining if it is a one time incident. It is that as has been stated already that Jeff (Farty Pants) McFartster sounds like one wheird F***ker. Does not sound like he knows when to engage the filters..... it could be grounds for a 'hostile work environment or harassment.
  • splashtree2
    splashtree2 Posts: 277
    OMG I can't stop laughing. Can you imagine being the person walking by hearing this argument? It is so obsurd. I'm surprised you didn't say anything about him calling you a double minority, or something like that. I don't recall the actual term you stated.

    Edit to correct: Minority Haul was the phrase used....Still funny


    yeah i agree is too funny is like a movie!
  • itodd4019
    itodd4019 Posts: 340 Member
    hahaha I think it's so funny that you wore him down and made him admit it! hahaha

    what a turd!
  • Jerrypeoples
    Jerrypeoples Posts: 1,541 Member
    i was working with a lady in the office. as i sat at her desk she stood behind me. she is known for making oddball noises to pass the time.

    as i am sitting there she farted. shes mid 60s and didnt say a word.

    i went back and told my boss and i told a few others what she did.

    i think its best to not call anyone out on such things as all it will do is lead to embarrassment. they know they farted, you know they farted does anything really have to be said.

    would you have been happier with him patting his stomach and saying, sweet baby jesus come smell this as he puts you in a headlock and makes you smell it?
  • Diary_Queen
    Diary_Queen Posts: 1,314 Member
    bump
  • itodd4019
    itodd4019 Posts: 340 Member
    LOL Jerry, you wouldn;t say anythign to the lady, but you went around the office and told everybody else

    uh boy
  • rachelrb85
    rachelrb85 Posts: 579 Member
    Omg...Is this real life? I can't stop laughing. I couldn't even deal with that conversation, I have no idea how you could handle that without breaking down in laughter. I still think he's in love with you but now I also think he's a huge weirdo. If you can't beat 'em, join 'em!
  • JamieJam1102
    JamieJam1102 Posts: 308 Member
    I LOVE that he tried to give you a hug afterwards. What did you do??? Bob and weave?
  • sun_kissd
    sun_kissd Posts: 2
    OK. Now this is hilarious.
  • Kimdbro
    Kimdbro Posts: 922 Member
    OMG.

    That is beyond weird.

    I have a feeling this guy is going to dig his own grave, sooner or later. People like that typically do.

    But I am also really glad that you were so assertive and direct, that's gonna set you up for a much easier time in your career IMO. Well done!!

    While I do agree that farty pants Jeff most likely made a bad choice in making you a victim, you might want to consider documenting this incident. If additional harassment comes down the road you may need this documentation to show a pattern of behavior to your HR.

    You did do the right thing by confronting him, but he may feel that since him and your husband are freinds, it allows him to mistreat you. What if next time he does something like this with one of your customers around?

    Just one old man's opinion..........

    Oh and yes I do have a sense of humor and found this extremely entertaining if it is a one time incident. It is that as has been stated already that Jeff (Farty Pants) McFartster sounds like one wheird F***ker. Does not sound like he knows when to engage the filters..... it could be grounds for a 'hostile work environment or harassment.

    I'm 99.99% sure that when she said her husband loves the guy... she means he found this story equally as hysterical as the rest of us, that he doesn't know him, nor is he friends with him, but merely a dude that appreciates a good farting story.... my husband thinks this story is fabulous, he too is not friends with the guy.
  • Kimdbro
    Kimdbro Posts: 922 Member
    i was working with a lady in the office. as i sat at her desk she stood behind me. she is known for making oddball noises to pass the time.

    as i am sitting there she farted. shes mid 60s and didnt say a word.

    i went back and told my boss and i told a few others what she did.

    i think its best to not call anyone out on such things as all it will do is lead to embarrassment. they know they farted, you know they farted does anything really have to be said.

    would you have been happier with him patting his stomach and saying, sweet baby jesus come smell this as he puts you in a headlock and makes you smell it?

    It is common knowlege that if you fart in front of another human being, you apologize. Best case scenario, you both laugh awkwardly and move on. You do not stare at them and then give them a donut..
  • wonderwoman234
    wonderwoman234 Posts: 551 Member
    This is hilarious!

    I think Jeff got defensive and denied his fart because you made him talk about something he hoped he would never have to acknowledge let alone discuss. He tried to buy your silence with a donut and it didn't work.....in fact, I believe the donut added fuel to the fire.

    Sales people usually have good people skills.....but this guy seems to be the exception. And the fact that another coworker pegged him as being an oddball might mean that his time at the Acme Asphalt Company is going to be short-lived.

    Just be careful that he doesn't turn the tables on YOU and start complaining that YOU are harassing HIM. When feeling cornered, some animals bite!
  • JenniferIsLosingIt
    JenniferIsLosingIt Posts: 595 Member
    BEST POST EVER! Laughed so hard my coworkers thought I had lost my mind!
  • srslybritt
    srslybritt Posts: 1,618 Member
    I'm just waiting for dude to "trust" the wrong gut bomb and become poopy pants Jeff. I hope that doesn't happen in your office.