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Would you rather feel 'Happy' or 'Valued'
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Happy. I know my worth; I couldn't care less how other people "value" me.
So much this. I don't need other people's opinions to me to determine my level of happiness.
I really don't think that's fair. Everyone has a different "love" language. Some people need affection, some people need gifts, some need words, others need to feel valued. No one thing is better than another. I find a lot of value in myself - but I find a lot of happiness when other people value my hard work and intelligence.0 -
Happy. I know my worth; I couldn't care less how other people "value" me.
So much this. I don't need other people's opinions to me to determine my level of happiness.
I really don't think that's fair. Everyone has a different "love" language. Some people need affection, some people need gifts, some need words, others need to feel valued. No one thing is better than another. I find a lot of value in myself - but I find a lot of happiness when other people value my hard work and intelligence.
I used to think the same way - but as I said recently noticed that I was dependent on someone else -briefly of course- for happiness. I think people for the most part do indeed need affection.
and your entirely right 'no one thing is better' - this is more so for observation and curiosity - I was more-so curious about everyone tending to lean one way or the other - but I'm under the impression 'happiness' is currently the winner - I just wonder if people are actually depending on other for happiness and just not realizing - sorta similar to my recent case.
thanks for your points Virgoodess! :flowerforyou:0 -
Happy. Feeling "valued" implies you get a sense of happiness from other peoples opinions of you. This isn't bad if you can be happy even if everyone isn't happy with you. Some people though, let the value others place on them effect their entire happiness.
^^ this. You just happen to be far better at articulating these things than me. I agree 100%0 -
Well I'm in the camp that happiness is a choice - a choice made easier when we feel fulfilled in other areas of our lives. For me, as a stay at home mom, I like to feel valued - I like when my husband comments on how nice the house looks, or my kids thank me for dinner. I'm not going to jump off a cliff if those things don't happen, but they do make the choice to be happier easier - if that makes any sense.0
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When you rely on others for your value or your happiness, it "usually" won't turn out well. Know your personal worth and value. Be your happiness. Live the life you dream of and want. Don't let anyone hold the key to your happiness or value. If someone wants to add to your happiness and value, great. However, never give anyone else that power over you. Know your value. Know your happiness. Live your best life.0
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Valued. I create my own happiness.
This. I and I alone am responsible for my happiness.0 -
What if being happy includes being valued? Happy covers so many things, so obviously happy. Valued s very specific and not as broad as happy. Happy wins out on what it could cover to ensure longevity as an answer on this one.0
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Valued. I create my own happiness.
This. I and I alone am resposonsible for my happiness.
^we are indeed responsible for our happiness - I just don't know if we acquire happiness through our viewpoint alone - I think it may be through the aid of others as well.
Think about what last made you unhappy - was it something that occurred internally or did it involve others?0 -
I would rather be happy been me than been valued, been valued contributes to been happy I suppose.0
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Happy. There will invariably be people in the world who don't value you in anyway regardless of how advantageous it may be. And being valued doesn't always lead to happiness IMO. I deal with lots of clients who are valued employees and workers, but aren't happy at all in relationships, their bodies, etc.
A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
IDEA Fitness member
Kickboxing Certified Instructor
Been in fitness industry for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition0 -
I no longer feel valued or respected , there for i can not be happy????
BUT i can be happy! :bigsmile:0 -
Happy. There will invariably be people in the world who don't value you in anyway regardless of how advantageous it may be. And being valued doesn't always lead to happiness IMO. I deal with lots of clients who are valued employees and workers, but aren't happy at all in relationships, their bodies, etc.
A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
IDEA Fitness member
Kickboxing Certified Instructor
Been in fitness industry for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition
This brings up a really interesting point - are we talking valued on a personal or professional level? In order to be happy at my job (staying home), I need to feel valued. But those same "rules" don't necessarily apply to my personal life.......0 -
^we are indeed responsible for our happiness - I just don't know if we acquire happiness through our viewpoint alone - I think it may be through the aid of others as well.
Think about what last made you unhappy - was it something that occurred internally or did it involve others?
Quite recently. Both But, I have since chosen to move past the situation and not dwell on it. I choose if I want to sit and stew and stay unhappy. Or I can move past something that does not essential affect my daily life. I can not control what others do, say, or opinions. I can control how I respond.0 -
I'd rather feel happy. Happiness is MY emotion. I can't control how others feel about me. Being valued is nice but out of my control.0
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My feelings of self worth are increased when others value me. That being said, it is not the source of my happiness. That is all my responsibility and up to me. It is not fair to other people to place the burden of my happiness on them. That is my job. And I cannot make anyone happy. I can try. And sometimes succeed. But at some place in time, I will fail and not live up to their expectations. And they will not always live up to mine. Glad my happiness is not connected to others.0
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I'd rather feel happy! I can give a **** about what anyone thinks or feels about me! If they don't value me that's their problem! As long as I have self awareness, and know my own worth, they can all bite me!0
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I'd rather feel happy! I can give a **** about what anyone thinks or feels about me! If they don't value me that's their problem! As long as I have self awareness, and know my own worth, they can all bite me!
It would make me happy to bite you.0 -
and that makes me happy lol0
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Its sort of a double edged sword. If I am not valued I am unhappy but do I really care what someone thinks my value is.
If I feel valuable about myself I think that's what makes me happy.0 -
Neither.
Value is a matter of perspective and it implies the approval of others which I don't care about.
Happiness is short lived and intermittent; temporary at best. It would imply emotional reaction which may be due to an isolated event when everything else is ****.
I rather be content because that implies logical satisfaction which means that everything is going well as opposed to just one event blinding me from the rest.
*assuming content with progress as opposed to position, since being content with position would imply complacency =P0
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