Affair after Weight Loss

Options
Wookinpanub
Wookinpanub Posts: 635 Member
in Chit-Chat
Ok- I'll probably get shellacked for this but have you or know someone who had an affair after significant weight loss? I would assume after weight loss, one is not used to getting "looks" or opportunities that were not there during heavier times - not that you are looking for opportunities but life happens sometimes. Maybe the spouse is not into fitness or is heavy and you are not as attracted as you were previously. Maybe there is a deeper psychological effect to be "liberated" from the former fat you.

Now you all can dump on me and say how you would never do such a thing.
«134567

Replies

  • Timshel_
    Timshel_ Posts: 22,834 Member
    Options
    Yes.

    Apparently all they did was work on their physical appearance and not worry about building character though.

    Then again, lots of people have affairs without losing weight.
  • Veil5577
    Veil5577 Posts: 868 Member
    Options
    My ex tried finding someone online to have an affair with when he got into really good shape and I was not. Needless to say, that was the beginning of the end for us.

    Losing weight is not an excuse for cheating. Sorry.
  • BrotherBill913
    BrotherBill913 Posts: 661 Member
    Options
    My ex tried finding someone online to have an affair with when he got into really good shape and I was not. Needless to say, that was the beginning of the end for us.

    Losing weight is not an excuse for cheating. Sorry.

    ^^^ This
  • BrianSharpe
    BrianSharpe Posts: 9,248 Member
    Options
    If anything my relationship with my wife has improved because I feel better about myself.
  • NextPage
    NextPage Posts: 609 Member
    Options
    Sorry but I had to chuckle - I was imagining the rest of the conversation after a cheater responded to their spouse's inquiry about a possible affair with "but honey I wasn't looking for the opportunity, life happens sometimes". Really?
  • usmcmp
    usmcmp Posts: 21,220 Member
    Options
    My ex had an affair while I was pregnant because he said he wasn't attracted to me.

    I think if someone has an affair after weight loss they would have done it before anyway they just didn't feel they had a chance at actually pulling it off.
  • debneeds2beskinny
    debneeds2beskinny Posts: 227 Member
    Options
    If you are going to cheat you are going to cheat. doesn't matter what excuse you use.
  • Faye_Anderson
    Faye_Anderson Posts: 1,495 Member
    Options
    Maybe the spouse is not into fitness or is heavy and you are not as attracted as you were previously.

    Why would you no longer be attracted to them if they are the same as they were before YOU lost the weight? Doesn't make sense
  • eventerchick80
    eventerchick80 Posts: 98 Member
    Options
    I have friends that got into the swinging lifestyle more after the wife lost a good bit of weight but with her not being used to all the attention she was going after everything she could. Not really an affair though, I guess, if it's agreed upon.
  • brando79az
    brando79az Posts: 224 Member
    Options
    It's easy to be faithful when nobody flirts with you. Only after there are opportunities can someone demonstrate commitment, loyalty and will power.

    Cheaters are totally lame.
  • Holly_Roman_Empire
    Holly_Roman_Empire Posts: 4,440 Member
    Options
    If anything my relationship with my wife has improved because I feel better about myself.

    This is me and my husband. Sex is better, too.
  • Lrdoflamancha
    Lrdoflamancha Posts: 1,280 Member
    Options
    :laugh:
  • dpwellman
    dpwellman Posts: 3,271 Member
    Options
    Ok- I'll probably get shellacked for this but have you or know someone who had an affair after significant weight loss?
    Yep. I sure do!

    This is a primary reason why I will NOT consider relationship with a, shall I say, 'significantly' overweight woman. I just won't.
  • oregonzoo
    oregonzoo Posts: 4,251 Member
    Options
    Usually the only people that worry about this kind of thing are paranoid and don't want to make changes to themselves.


    I think if somebody is going to cheat, they'll cheat.

    No reason to discriminate and say people trying to get fit will.
  • inneedofanap
    inneedofanap Posts: 63 Member
    Options
    Shortly after a friend of mine lost a bunch of weight her marriage failed. She didn't have a physical affair but she had already moved on in her mind. It wasn't so much because of her attitude but because of her husbands. I think he felt like he had the upper-hand and was "superior" in some way when she was overweight. When she lost the weight, he lost his confidence because he felt like she could have anyone she wanted now that she was thin.

    He was a jerk.
  • Icoza87
    Icoza87 Posts: 111 Member
    Options
    I think if someone has an affair after weight loss they would have done it before anyway they just didn't feel they had a chance at actually pulling it off.
    ^
  • Wookinpanub
    Wookinpanub Posts: 635 Member
    Options
    Ok- I'll probably get shellacked for this but have you or know someone who had an affair after significant weight loss?
    Yep. I sure do!

    This is a primary reason why I will NOT consider relationship with a, shall I say, 'significantly' overweight woman. I just won't.

    I respect your honesty
  • spacecase76
    spacecase76 Posts: 673 Member
    Options
    There is no valid excuse for having an affair.

    As a former smoker, I can tell you that major personal changes (like quitting smoking, losing weight, etc) can really show you how strong or weak your relationship is when you no longer have that in common. My marriage was hit or miss to begin with, but when I quit smoking and we no longer had that "bond" it went downhill FAST. To my knowledge neither of us cheated though. It just ended and I put him out.
  • kd_mazur
    kd_mazur Posts: 569 Member
    Options
    My ex tried finding someone online to have an affair with when he got into really good shape and I was not. Needless to say, that was the beginning of the end for us.

    Losing weight is not an excuse for cheating. Sorry.

    I'm sorry to hear this happened to you. It happened to me too:(
  • slerich
    slerich Posts: 14 Member
    Options
    Well the opposite happened to me. When I lost all my weight I gain a lot of self confidence and I guess my ex wasn't attracted to a fit woman or a confident one so he had an affair on me with a much larger woman.

    I got a lot more attention but I never noticed because I wasn't looking for it. I noticed how much attention I was getting after my seperation. I guess in the long run things happen for a reason and I now know I'm in a much better place than I was and very happy with my new life and will never go back to my old self!!!


    There is no good reason for cheating. If you want out of the relationship do it before cheating. Everyone ends up getting hurt when this happens.

Categories