What is the weirdest weight loss advice you've ever had?

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Replies

  • angelexperiment
    angelexperiment Posts: 1,917 Member
    I get annoyed with logic behind why people follow Trending diets like Paleo, the idea that I will lose weight and be healthier like Humans from the paleolithic era because I'm eating the way they did. Have you ever met someone from that era and thought to yourself, man he looked good? Also pretty sure humans from that era also had to hunt for their food, went long periods of time without food and probably didn't live much longer than 30-40 years at a time due to sickness and disease and other factors attributed to lack of technology and modern medicine.

    I have nothing against the idea of avoiding processed foods if that's someone's personal preference, but why not call paleo the no processed foods diet? I recognize that paleo does work for some people but that isn't surprising if you think about it, imagine how easy it might be to stay under your calorie goal if you can't eat fast food, drink sugared sodas, fried chicken and etc. If I ate nothing but whole foods meats, veggies and fruits and didn't add processed food, oils and butters I'm pretty sure I could stay under my calorie goal too. I would just miss all of my favorite foods and once I stopped the Paleo diet just go right back to my bad habits. All that work learning how to be good at paleo wasted in the end.

    If you lose weight on a diet it's because you consumed less calories than you burned which can be achieved by diet alone or in combination with exercise and activity. You can totally gain weight on paleo if you eat at a surplus, there's no magic behind it.

    Well, there is more theory behind it than just non-processed foods, and it's still evolving, so you'll see different variations. The Paleo part itself just seems to be mostly a marketing gimick, though I imagine there were groups of people in certain areas of the world that ate very similarly to the diet during the Paleolithic area (just not all people in the world during that time). And some of the variations incorporate more than just the diet -- but lifestyle changes that mimic some of the other things seen in that time (like more emphasis on lifting heavy and high volume, low intensity cardio like lots of walking/hiking, etc.).

    More than anything, I see the Paleo diet and its variations more of a response to issues more and more people are having with certain things in the modern diet -- whether it's reactions to gluten, lactose, casein, etc. And folks with some of these reactions find that they do shockingly better on such diets -- many of which diet even know they had these sensitivities until they tried the diet. So it does seem sort of miraculous to them. But Autoimmune, Gastrointestinal Sensitivities Diet is a mouthful. Paleo is easier.
    there is a diet for that its called the fodmaps or gaps diets
  • jenny3008
    jenny3008 Posts: 97 Member
    Apparently I can eat as much as I like from 'Natures Garden' and I won't get fat in fact I will lose weight. I'm not sure how extensive this garden of nature is but if the individual was eating meat and fish as well as peanut butter so its fairly extensive

    So I can quit the gym, stop the calorie counting and just be healthy, slim and toned while eating all I want :)
  • clairebeth8
    clairebeth8 Posts: 30 Member
    I went to a nutritionist at my doctor's office and she told me that the best way to lose the 10 pounds I wanted off was to eat exactly 1200 calories everyday. And if I worked out I couldn't eat any more. After a few days of being a crazed, hungry, low-blood-sugar monster, I realized that I should probably eat a little more. Yeah, I never went back for my follow up with her...
  • angelexperiment
    angelexperiment Posts: 1,917 Member
    Guy had a tapeworm his cat threw up he wanted to give me just to help me out
    what! He does know tapeworms can kill you right? How dumb.
  • angelexperiment
    angelexperiment Posts: 1,917 Member
    I've heard many of these before.

    The strangest (and one of the most dangerous) one's I've come across is the "cotton-ball diet"

    You dip a "cotton" (it's not actually cotton) in oil, then swallow it. It, supposedly fills up your stomach so you eat less.

    I have no words....
    then you get a nice little thing (well big thing)called a bowel obstruction
  • blownsi
    blownsi Posts: 3 Member
    I have been told by more than one person that praying is the only answer because you just can't lose weight on your own.
  • ukaryote
    ukaryote Posts: 874 Member
    I have been told by more than one person that praying is the only answer because you just can't lose weight on your own.

    That is not too far off the mark. We do better with support, like on MFP, and if you get your support by praying, then good on ya!
    (No pun intended. OK, maybe.)
  • Holla4mom
    Holla4mom Posts: 587 Member
    I told a friend that while I lived in Colombia I got a parasite. I couldn't eat and if I did it all came right back out the back end in a most unpleasant way. She literally said to me, "What a great way to lose weight." I've also heard of people purposely ingesting tape worms.

    The craziness! Girlfriend probably went to see where she could order a parasite after that!
  • EmmieBaby
    EmmieBaby Posts: 1,235 Member
    "if you don't look up the nutritional content it doesn't count"

    "don't eat eggs they make you fat"

    " eating breakfast makes you fat"

    and best one

    "sleeping on your stomach means your belly will sag and never be flat"
  • CupcakeCrusoe
    CupcakeCrusoe Posts: 1,423 Member
    In for later.
  • Illusion1993
    Illusion1993 Posts: 2 Member
    Guy had a tapeworm his cat threw up he wanted to give me just to help me out
    what! He does know tapeworms can kill you right? How dumb.

    Just thinking of this made me feel grossed out and sick. Who the hell is that stupid?
  • Happymelz
    Happymelz Posts: 536 Member
    in so others will see the post.
  • SuperVixen2B
    SuperVixen2B Posts: 218 Member
    While my husband was sipping a diet soda, his brother said "You know it's those things that make you fat". Uh huh. That's why. Exclusively.
  • Chaskavitch
    Chaskavitch Posts: 172 Member
    Courtesy of the "Gummy bear diet"


    "41,395 of 42,038 people found the following review helpful
    Just don't. Unless it's a gift for someone you hate.
    By Christine E. Torokon October 3, 2012
    Size Name: 5 lbVerified Purchase
    Oh man...words cannot express what happened to me after eating these. The Gummi Bear "Cleanse". If you are someone that can tolerate the sugar substitute, enjoy. If you are like the dozens of people that tried my order, RUN!

    ...

    As a cleanse, these bears are marvelous!"

    Thats just a few :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:

    I started to read these at work, and I had to stop and send this thread to myself to read later, because I was afraid I was literally going to snort trying not to laugh, and all of my coworkers would think I was ill or something. Those people have some amazing descriptive talents :)
  • gmoneycole
    gmoneycole Posts: 813 Member
    Just take off a limb...
  • jasonmh630
    jasonmh630 Posts: 2,850 Member
    The 5 bite diet.
    At your meal time you can have 5 bites of ANY one food you enjoy and you will lose weight.

    huge+spoon.jpg

    I constantly get people telling me that once I lose a bit more weight, I won't be diabetic anymore. I wish, but I've been diabetic since I was 2 lol. There are different kinds.

    Oh and my coworkers new diet...you aren't supposed to eat fat and carbs at the same time, otherwise you can't lose weight :/

    A friend of mine said some lady in the "medical field" told her the same thing about diabetes... My friend has been diabetic since she was very young too and uses an insulin pump. She told the woman she was crazy and if she actually believed that, she should find another profession she doesn't fail at lol.
  • pinkpuke672
    pinkpuke672 Posts: 14 Member
    My aunt once told me it wasn't good for me to cut too much down on the sugar as "sugar contains a lot of important nutrients too".
    If I didn't know my family, I would've thought it was a joke.
  • TJWrites00
    TJWrites00 Posts: 27 Member
    This is the most hilarious thread I've read all day.

    I needed that laugh.
  • bunnylion
    bunnylion Posts: 265 Member
    "just *kitten* the weight off"

    funny thing is i think they were being serious

    Sex (even alone) does count as exercise....

    However, the amount you'd have to get/do to make a significant weight loss dent....

    I can just imagine the diet book: "The Perv Diet: Sex Your Way to Sexypants!"

    MUHAHAHA! I would totally buy that book. And convince everybody that it is the ONLY way to lose weight!