rudest thing anyone has ever said about your weight?
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I just want to tell every single one of you on this thread how very proud I am of you.0
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My heart is just hurting reading through all these comments, and how unbelievable cruel some people can be Growing up my mom weighed the same as she did upon graduating high school (super skinny, and always on the move), so she'd make "helpful" comments occasionally calling me "pleasantly plump". Shortly after I got married (5'5, 114 pounds), my then husband and I made the move cross country from VA to CA - and within that first year I gained 20 pounds, finally away from her influence. She and my dad came out to visit, and upon returning home two wks later, she called me out of the blue one afternoon with the following: "You aren't pregnant are you?" I told her that I wasn't, and that if I was, I would have happily shared the news with them, because it was actually something that we wanted. She replied "I was just looking over the pictures that we had taken while we were out there, and oh my goodness, you've gotten SO heavy."
I remember my jaw actually dropping, and I was at a loss for words because hers were so hurtful. I told my then husband what she had said when he came home that evening, and he was LIVID - it had taken him that whole year to finally get me to see that he thought I was beautiful just the way I was, and that the way she viewed food/exercise/being skinny was totally on her, and NOT a reflection on how anyone else saw me. I decided not to talk to her for awhile after that - until my father called me about a month later and asked me to please mend fences because she was making his life a living hell talking about the fact that I refused to speak with her when she would call. A few days later she called again, and I picked up to hear her half hearted apology "I'm sorry if what I said upset you, I was just surprised, that's all."
At 5'5 and 134 pounds she thought I needed her to tell me what she thought about my weight - um no, I really didn't.
Now that I think about it, I remember another incident when I was in middle school (11 yrs old, 5'1 and around 110) - she came across a note that I had written a friend telling her how I thought a certain boy was cute. Her response? "You shouldn't be passing notes in class.....and really, do you honestly think a boy would be interested in you?" - Wow, just reading that makes me shake my head.
My daughter (now 15) started to gain a little weight when she was around the same age, and my mom made the mistake of saying something about it when we were visiting one summer. I INSTANTLY made sure she understood that was unacceptable, and that I would NOT have my child have the same tapes playing in her head that I did in mine based on what SHE thought. Mama Bear x 1000, you betcha.
Interestingly, I'm now ten pounds heavier than I was when she thought I was "so heavy" after her first trip to CA - and during our last visit together (a few months ago) she made it a point of telling me "how great I look" - perhaps she's finally realized a few things since then (I would certainly hope so)?0 -
not specifically "said"... but definitely an insult nonetheless...
i used to date a guy who lived outside knoxville, tn. his mother didn't like me because i was a non-christian yankee, and not skinny by any means. the one christmas i spent with them, she picked out a v-neck sweater and mock turtleneck for me (despite the fact that i can't wear turtlenecks, they make me feel like i'm choking). the insult was that she'd purchased them from lane bryant, even though it was in the smallest size they carry.
at the time, i'd never heard of lane bryant because there weren't any up near me. i normally got my nicer clothes from express, which coincidentally was where my ex-bf's mom bought most of her daughter's clothes. it took me years before i realized what she'd done.
side story... her daughter (ex-bf's little sister) was thin, and their parents' friends always used to tease her about being too skinny. i clearly remember one night, i was in the bathroom and overheard them telling her she needed to gain 10 pounds. i clearly remember her response: "no, because then i'd be 115lbs and that's just too heavy!" i was in the 180 range at the time.0 -
A stranger asking if I was pregnant, 14 months after my daughter was born. This was after I'd lost most of the weight! She then laughed and said haha I'm just kidding! (I was 140lbs at the time and didn't think I looked bad!)0
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I play on an Indoor Soccer League. Goalkeeper. Last week, I stiopped a shot and then rolled the ball out of the box and started dribbling downfield. Young kid tried to steal the ball, I juked him and ran past.
After the game he came up to me and said "I would have never thought you were that fast." All he needed to add was "...for a fat guy." or "...for an old guy."0 -
Well, I've been mistaken for pregnant. The person, a complete stranger, looked at my belly and said "a boy or a girl?" and I shouted "IM NOT PREGNANT. I'M JUST FAT. THANKS A LOT!" So then he scuttled away and I hope he learned something from it.0
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A girl pointed at me asked her boyfriend (very loudly) : "Would you still be with me if I looked like that?"
I really, really hope she is fat now.
A mother whose daughter was having a tantrum told her "No, you can't have sweets or you will end up like the fat, ugly lady over there".
The most hurtful comments came from my family. I am not even going to mention them.0 -
fairly recently a bunch of my younger coworkers (16-19 y/o girls) decided they were going to do the master cleanse... that weird, just drink water with cayenne and lemon in it, or something like that, diet. i told them that it was unnecessary and a really bad way to go about losing weight... which they didn't need to do anyways. one of them said something along the lines of "well maybe if you tried it...".
she since then apologized and all the other girls told her how rude it was. it doesn't really bother me 'cuz i've been getting things like that forever, but i've since stopped saying anything about their weird crash diets.0 -
I was about 17 someone looked at me and said congrats, didn't know you were pregnant she was like 50 .0
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I lost 84lbs over the course of 2 years excercising and watching what i was eating, the mother-in-law pullled my wife to one said and asked if i was using heroin!!!!!!! Then started to constantly ask me if i was ill and that she was concerned about me.......stopped losing after that as i got fed up of all the criticism off her, gained 60lbs back and now im back here...this time going to ignore her comments though0
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Honestly, I take offense to anyone asking me if I've lost weight. I know my number keeps rising and I KNOW my clothes are fitting differently. I'm sure they're trying to be nice, but it just reinforces the fact that people are looking at me and I'd like to REALLY be thinner. Other than that, the worst thing anyone's ever said is "you were getting so small, what happened?".
Life happened.0 -
"But you have such a pretty face!!"
All I can think is (excuse my language) "*kitten* you".0 -
but really, none of these are as horrifying as what the voice in my head is telling me.
The voices in our heads are sometimes the most vile of them all.0 -
"Wow, you got up to 150?"
After I said, hey look I lost some 10 lbs, I'm 140.
Sigh.
I was ok with 150. I'm ok with where I am now. But seriously, rude!0 -
My wedding is in 2 months and MY FATHER said I was "massively fat" - I should "starve for a few weeks" or I would lose my fiancee.......
...and that would be the last i spoke to my father for a while.
I got the "You'll never find a husband if you eat like that" from my dad when I was 14. Nice. Love how those comments stick with you.
Whats even better is when your older sister is by far smaller, and daddy dearest doesn't let you live that one down.
Yay dad, thanks for life long internal scars.0 -
Within the last 3 years I graciously let my mother live with me. She'd eat a whole loaf of bread in one sitting but then tell me I needed to watch my calories when I at a salad.
She also told me that I was so fat that she was embarrassed to be seen with me.
Needless to say I had found her another place to live.0 -
when i was a teenager i was only like... 20-30 pounds overweight. i was an actor in a rendition of rocky horror picture show and played a minor part. for the halloween show all the parts are thrown in a hat and drawn by the actors, whoever you get is who you play on halloween, practice or no. i overheard my director expressing gratitude to someone that i didnt get any floorshow parts because and i quote "nobody wants to see her in her underwear" that pissed me off for 10 years or so... i did finally get over it, and even talked to the guy at a party and told him why i was rude to him every time i saw him, we got over it.
but the worst one was... last school year i voluntereered to help at my kindergartners field trip. my son told me the night before that he had asked the class to please not make fun of me for my sticky outie tummy. i got kinda mad at him. i said kader, i dont need you to apologize for me ok, i am your mom and i am the one you get. sticky outtie tummy or no. (this was after i had lost my first 25 pounds too). it made me really sad that he was already starting to feel embarrast of me.0 -
one time when swimming at the river a guy friend yelled "whale crossing" as i swam by a group of people.
he was joking, but STILL!!!0 -
What frustrated me the most was the constant you should loose weight or attempt to control what I was eating while everyone around me continued to eat bad.
This frustrates me too. I am hypothyroid and the only thing my family wants to know is "Have you lost any weight?" My medication isn't there as weight loss medication. Anytime I show them the workout video I'm using to exercise with, they will change the subject to whatever they are more interested in. On the other side of things, my husband's family has been very supportive. My MIL is on MFP with me along with my husband's cousin.
There are times I wished I could drop my side of the family. They seem so selfish, and it make me think am I selfish too? I try really hard to ask about everyone else and learn from them, but I keep coming back to wondering if I'm just as bad.
As for the rudest things people have said to me, I can think of many, Thunder Thighs, Bubble Butt. For some reason they never bothered me. Unsupported by my family hurts the worst.0 -
My wedding is in 2 months and MY FATHER said I was "massively fat" - I should "starve for a few weeks" or I would lose my fiancee.......
...and that would be the last i spoke to my father for a while.
I got the "You'll never find a husband if you eat like that" from my dad when I was 14. Nice. Love how those comments stick with you.
Whats even better is when your older sister is by far smaller, and daddy dearest doesn't let you live that one down.
Yay dad, thanks for life long internal scars.
this is one of the reasons i'm glad i was an only child. my mother was CONSTANTLY on me about my weight, utterly refused to realize that i have a much larger frame and carry a LOT more muscle than she does, and the kicker... she was in complete control over the food in the house and refused to change how she cooked. if i tried to not finish what she gave me, i got yelled at to eat everything on my plate.
it was not-so-subtly obvious that my mother was a lot nicer to my older stepsisters simply because they were much thinner than i'd ever be.0 -
Oh yes, I just remembered: I actually had a boyfriend that would grab my stomach and lovehandles and ask me "what's this?" and laugh. One of the many reasons he's an ex now.0
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The people who've been judging me have been doing it quietly. My theory is that I'm so fat that people assume I know I'm being judged and that it would be pointless to point it out.0
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I had someone in a truck throw Mcdonald's wrappers at me and start singing the Jenny Craig jingle. I was both vehemently pissed off and depressed and crying at the same time lol.
I've also gotten "You're face is so pretty, it's a shame the rest of you looks like...that"0 -
I was invited to a pool party, and when I didn't say yes right away, the woman said: "there'll be other fat girls there.".0
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"I know I'm fat, but damn"
Sad thing is I had just seen this person scarfing down junk in the parking lot when I was walking out of the gym.0 -
More than once -
"You would be pretty if you lost ___ pds."
Good thing I am smart......0 -
Go hypothyroid! Have the blessing here as well :frown:
Just eat less - well to loose weight I have to eat under 800 calories and exercise. Completely understand your frustration. But I am on track and will lose this weight even if it means 800 calories.
Hang in there you are not alone.0 -
When I was 10 years old, two different friends of my mom and dad (divorced), commented in front of me that I had "gained quite a bit of weight". I remember it like it was yesterday. And I had gained weight, it was a rough time. Weight became a major issue for me throughout high school and college. When I went back to nursing school as an adult I was working as unit secretary at a large hospital. From the time I started nursing school I started gaining weight. One of the nurses told me that it looked like I had gained so much weight that I was going to need new scrubs soon and didn't even look like the same person. I cried. And found a new job.0
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Oh wait, one more, probably the biggest. How could I forget? After the birth of my daughter, my now ex husband said he wasn't attracted to me because I was looking like a whale.0
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I was really skinny when I was younger. I had one guy that would take pictures when I ate and be like "OMG THE ANOREXIC IS EATING LOL". I didn't have an eating disorder at the time, my family is just really thin until they turn 18 and grow boobs lol. They would mock me for being kind-of flat chested (I wasn't even that bad! Just a 32B!)
They made such a big deal out of me eating that I stopped eating in front of people...I eventually became anorexic because I hated my body and felt "lopsided" because my breasts weren't large enough (in my disordered brain) and were never going to be, so I starved until my legs were "small enough" to be equal.
I had a really effed-up self-image from all the stuff I heard. At least I have 32E boobs now...it makes me feel less obsessed with losing size on my legs.0
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