Over 170lbs Gone WITH PCOS!

It's taken me a long time to get this down, because it's a VERY long story. I've ALWAYS been overweight. Since, I was a young child, I've never known what "thin" was. As a child, I didn't eat fast food-- in the early 80's, you didn't just "go to McDonald's". McDonald's or something like that was *maybe* a once a month treat or on a special occasion. I didn't eat meat. I didn't like it. I ate any kind of fruit or vegetable you would put in front of me, ALWAYS drank water and milk, and yet, I was overweight. The doctors always told my parents to "cut my food back", and my mother was beside of herself. What am I supposed to feed her? She doesn't eat meat, she doesn't eat bread. She eats fruit and veggies, but of course, the doctors didn't believe her. As I got a little older, I eventually began to like chicken and fish, and would eat some carbohydrate rich foods like bread, which only made things worse.

Here I am, in third grade, at age 8. By this time, I already weighed roughly 120lbs.



Despite the fact that I was heavy, I didn't let things get me down. In 8th grade, at age 13, I was a cheerleader. I was 200lbs.



By this time, I'd tried counting calories, working out by walking, swimming, weight watchers, Richard Simmons "Deal A Meal", and nothing was working. I felt really hopeless, and thought I was going to be fat forever. I went to a county school from Kindergarten through 8th grade- so our entire school was in one building. We only had like 300 students, so it was a very small school. When I went to high school, there would be over 1000 students in one building- because I had to go to the city high school, there was no designated high school for us in our area.

I desperately wanted to be a cheerleader in high school, but I KNEW there was NO way a fat girl was gonna make the cheerleading team at the city high school. **Warning-- I do NOT recommend what I did** So, I knew I had to do something. I weighed 225lbs.



I had to lose weight. I began taking step aerobics five nights a week, and every Saturday morning. I ate *roughly* 600 calories a day, and NO more. I watched EVERYTHING that went into my mouth, and drank enough water to float away. I stopped being hungry after about a month of this. My head often hurt, but I didn't care. I wanted to be thin. I WANTED to be a cheerleader. I kept this up for an entire year. How much weight do you think I lost- restriction of calories to the extreme that I did, and the step aerobics 6 days a week?

NOT. ONE. POUND.

I lost nothing. I was devastated every time I stepped on the scale, but I was terrified to eat, because I wasn't going to gain weight. It wasn't until I had a Pilonidal Cyst rupture in the late fall of 1993 that my dreams came crashing down on me. My surgeon told me I'd never cheer. I'd never play volleyball, tennis, softball, or any of the other sports that I wanted to. If I took another fall like the one I did in gym (which is what we believe caused the cyst to come to the surface) I could end up with one even worse. I was devastated. I was out of school for almost a month, and healing was slow and very painful. After that, I just gave up.

I went back to eating normally, and didn't go back to taking aerobics for almost a year.

My weight at that time was 260lbs. By my senior year of high school, I graduated weighing 299lbs.



After high school, every year, my weight slowly crept up. I didn't *see* myself getting as big as I was. I would go to the tanning bed, to try to make myself look smaller, or what I thought looked *better*. I always fixed up to make myself feel good about myself. I never saw myself at 300lbs, and certainly never at 400lbs when I looked in the mirror.

Every new fad that came out, I tried it. South Beach, Adkins, I don't even remember what it was called- but I tried something crazy where you were supposed to drink Grapefruit Juice 30 minutes before you ate your meal. I tried the nothing after 6pm. I tried no soft drinks, no sugar. Anything that I'd heard someone had success with, I would give a try. From 1997 to 1999, I went to the track faithfully, 5 to 7 nights a week. My aunt and cousin often went with me.

I continued to get bigger.

I remember looking at this picture back in 1999 and thinking "Damn, I look good!" I weighed roughly 330lbs.



I didn't know it then, but I had PCOS. My hair was starting to thin. Little by little, I developed these symptoms over the next few years- extreme fatigue, skin tags, dark patches of skin around my neck, under arms and between my legs, excess hair in areas I didn't want it to be in, I was constantly hot, I got very sick when I ate, yet, I was gaining weight constantly, and month after month would go by, and I didn't have a period.

December 31st of 2002 came. My wedding day. I was exhausted. I was sick. My hair was so short, and so thin, that Laura had trouble doing much with what I had. I weighed 400lbs.



Shortly after we were married, I got insurance for the first time since I'd been in high school. I was able to go see my OB/GYN, and the first thing I did was go have my annual cervical exam and bloodwork. I told Dr. Crowder I didn't feel well. I'd gained a ton of weight, I hadn't had a period in over a year, I knew I wasn't pregnant- that I'd taken probably 20 tests in a 6 month period and they were all negative. For the first time in my life, I had a doctor that didn't judge me. She didn't look at the 400lbs woman sitting on her exam table and say, "Well, if you'll just stop eating, you'll lose weight." Instead, she said, let's find out WHY you're gaining weight, and what's going on.

She took several vials of blood on that visit. Including a fasting blood gluclose, to test for diabetes. I got the joy of sitting and waiting for an hour for even more blood to be drawn.

A few days later, she called me in absolute horror. She told me to come in. My blood work was in extremely bad shape. My testosterone was through the roof, my estrogen was extremely low, my blood sugar was perfect, yet, my insulin levels were EXTREMELY high. She had a diagnosis for me. PCOS. Poly Cystic Ovarian Syndrome. She believes I've most likely had this my entire life. Because no doctor knew or bothered to find out *why* when I was younger that I was heavy, instead of simply telling me to "lose weight' or "cut out this or cut out that", they never once drew a vial of blood to test any hormone levels. Nothing. It was too late for simply a diet and exercise change to treat this. I was in bad shape.

She instructed me to eat a lower carbohydrate diet, get moderate exercise, and prescribed me Metformin ER.

I was thankful to have a name for what was wrong, and a treatment. I had no idea that when I began Metformin, what it would be like. My stomach was often upset. I would have to RUN to make it to the bathroom on time after eating, and there were times, I'd throw up violently if I ate something that was fried or simply too greasy. I really had to learn to alter my lifestyle completely, but I wasn't giving up.

Unfortunately, it wasn't enough. my blood work was actually getting worse. I'd lost most of my hair by this time, and I'd resorted to wearing clip on hair most of the time. My co-workers were very supportive of me, and so kind. They would always make a big deal of it when I'd get new hair, and make me feel good, but physically, I felt horrible. I'd begun passing out at work, and Dr. Crowder was at a loss. When she did the last blood work, she was in shock. My insulin levels were at 30ml, which is roughly 5 times that of a normal adult (of 5ml). She repeated the test, to make sure that it was correct. The results were the same.

She had no idea how I wasn't in a coma with this much insulin my body.

I wasn't absorbing any of it. I wasn't metabolizing ANYTHING I ate. I was throwing up violently every time I ate. I was sleeping all the time, and honestly, I thought I wasn't going to see 30.

It was at that point, that my life was saved. She, and an endocrinologist allowed me to be a guinea pig for the diabetic injection Byetta. That, in conjunction with Metformin ER, saved my life. I began using these medications in tandem in November of 2005. It was a VERY, VERY rough road. There were times that I thought the "cure" was worse than the disease.

I often threw up after eating, and NOT by choice. My stomach hurt badly. I was bloated, and ached. Despite eating the lower carbohydrate diet that I'd been instructed to, there were things that my body did NOT like with Byetta, and there were only certain portions of food you can and can't eat with it as well. It took me awhile to learn these things, and the only way to learn them is the hard way. I often had bad days where I was sick from "overeating"- AKA: eating a normal portion of food. I would have to lie down until it digested. BUT, I didn't give up. I wanted to live. These medications for the first time in my life, were helping me to properly metabolize my food, and control how much insulin my body was producing. I was determined I was going to take control of my health and be healthy!

Slowly, but surely, the weight started to come off. In November, I lost 15lbs! I was over the moon! I couldn't believe it! I don't think I'd ever lost 15lbs in my entire life! Dr. Crowder was pleased, and thankful that we'd found something that was working to help get my PCOS under control.

By November of 2006, I was close to 300lbs! I'd lost almost 100lbs in a year! My blood work, was PERFECT! It seriously, was a miracle! Everything was perfect! My insulin levels were normal! Estrogen, testosterone, EVERYTHING! I was living! I was alive! I was going to make it!

I kept on going! I wasn't giving up at 300lbs! I had more weight I wanted to get off! But, there was a temporary halt, that was a definite blessing! In 2008, I became pregnant with my daughter, Savannah Boleyn. I did stay on both medications throughout my pregnancy with her, as I had done extensive research on BOTH medications, and with/under doctors supervision decided the benefits outweighed any risks. She was born full-term on February 4th, 2009 with no ill-effects/defects from the medications, while I stayed healthy, and actually lost 30lbs (without trying) while I was pregnant. The day I gave birth, I weighed 269lbs!



I suffered with a severe birth injury from giving birth (Obstetric Fistula). I spent a lot of time over the three years after giving birth in and out of therapy. I lived with the fistula for 15 months until I was able to have a successful repair. I did lose quite a bit of weight at different points during this time, and NOT because of trying. I will spare everyone the gruesome details of what a fistula is, and how I had to live during those 15 months, but the only thing I will say, is that bowel movements were NOT my friend. I began to live on Ensure as much as possible. NOT because I wanted to lose weight. Weight was the last thing on my mind. I just wanted to remember what it was like to be normal for a day. I did that until I began passing out. After that, I was monitored eating, which made me angry (because if I put food in my body, that meant it had to come out.) I had severe PTSD, and this just amplified things.

In 2010 after my surgery to repair the fistula, I felt as if I'd been given my life back! I celebrate May 11th every year as if it were my birthday. On that day, I went into surgery at 245lbs, at Vanderbilt University Hospital.

Since that day, and every day forward, I've appreciated the fullness of life. I'm still working hard. I realize I've been through a lot mentally, physically, and emotionally. Life hasn't dealt me the easiest cards, but they haven't been the worst, either. I have to take my medications every day. I have to watch my carbohydrates. I have to be active. I have to keep going. There is NO cure for PCOS. I will die with this, but it's not going to kill me. I chose to fight, when I felt like lying on my couch and dying. I chose to put the injection in my stomach, despite the fact that it made me violently ill, because I knew it would help me. I chose to eat better, and be active. I have made mistakes. I own every pound of the 222lbs I have right now. I realize I have made bad choices, despite living with PCOS, but it doesn't have to live with me for the rest of my life.

As of today, I weigh 222lbs. (This was taken September 2nd)