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KristenAnn711
KristenAnn711 Posts: 783
in Chit-Chat
I won't get into details but I feel like since I've gained the weight things have fizzled out. My boyfriend is the same, but I just never want to, and it's starting to become a problem. Maybe this isn't the place, but I just feel like there has to be someone who can give me some kind of advice here.
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Replies

  • eillamarie
    eillamarie Posts: 862 Member
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    Could it be that you're tired from working out so much? Or not getting enough nutrition? I've read that weightloss tends to do 1 of 2 things.....either revs it up or kills it.
  • leomom72
    leomom72 Posts: 1,797 Member
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    i think the longer you are in a relationship, the less exciting it gets..try adult stores, or watch "movies" together, to get new ideas..good luck ;)
  • 311Phil
    311Phil Posts: 397
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    my sex drive has gone through the roof since i began exercising regularly! My wife says im like a rabid dog, lol.
  • EmilyAnn89
    EmilyAnn89 Posts: 564 Member
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    i'm the same way, i don't like to undress because of how i look, so it kinda creates a problem lol... the best advice i have is try your best to be comfortable in your own skin. just keep pushing forward on your journey and by that time you will feel so good you'll forget all about how you are feeling now :)
  • merrillfoster
    merrillfoster Posts: 855 Member
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    Do it anyway (but don't let him know you're not that into it). The more you do it the more you want it. Plus, sex burns cals!!!! And works weird muscles you didn't know you had (no, not just those! ;))!!!! I think if you just start doing it anyway you'll get back into it.
  • mlemonroe2
    mlemonroe2 Posts: 603
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    I have felt the same way. Try to find something that makes you feel sexy. Maybe a piece of clothing or getting your hair done or something like that. Light some candles, drink some wine. Good luck!!
  • kh0215
    kh0215 Posts: 56 Member
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    Make a specific time of the week for sex. and do it! endorphins are a great thing!! BTDT- introduce some "heightener" products. I had the same problems when I started an antidepressant.
  • My3Rayz
    My3Rayz Posts: 373
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    I feel the EXACT same way! I don't feel attractive and the thought of my jiggly parts flopping around sends me into a panic. Don't know what the solution is. I've kinda bit the bullet a few times but my heart wasn't in it. Feeling good about yourself will help put you in the mood!!!
  • britishstar41
    britishstar41 Posts: 140 Member
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    I lost my drive when I gained the weight. I also had a baby, which messes with your hormones, but still. I'm in the same boat. I think once we start really losing and we feel better about ourselves and more comfortable with our bodies, things will pick up again.
  • godsgiftjcp
    godsgiftjcp Posts: 50
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    I think the same thing. But now that I have started to lose weight, I find myself wanting to have sex more and more. I think it was a lack of energy before. Once your energy level goes back up, I think you will be fine.
  • jenbk2
    jenbk2 Posts: 623 Member
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    Could be you are not comfortable in your skin so you feel down and not wanting to do those things. I am the same way. I hope to get it back when I feel sexier.
  • 311Phil
    311Phil Posts: 397
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    drink some wine.
    THIS. we shared a bottle over the weekend....turned out to be a REALLY good night ;-)
  • KristenAnn711
    KristenAnn711 Posts: 783
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    Do it anyway (but don't let him know you're not that into it). The more you do it the more you want it. Plus, sex burns cals!!!! And works weird muscles you didn't know you had (no, not just those! ;))!!!! I think if you just start doing it anyway you'll get back into it.

    That's what I do, but I just feel guilty that way.
  • Charcole
    Charcole Posts: 1
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    Every time I talk to my brother, who has a new girlfriend, he tells me he's lost another pound or two. I asked him, what are you doing differently. he said nothing really, just having sex more often. Sometimes several times a day he said. I guess it can make a difference.
  • swbmcknight
    swbmcknight Posts: 19
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    One of the common "side effects" of a low carb, high protein diet is loss of libido. VERY common.
  • Mrs_McFadden
    Mrs_McFadden Posts: 1,139
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    Do it anyway (but don't let him know you're not that into it). The more you do it the more you want it. Plus, sex burns cals!!!! And works weird muscles you didn't know you had (no, not just those! ;))!!!! I think if you just start doing it anyway you'll get back into it.

    ^^^ This.

    Fake it if you don't want it..like using training wheels. I think sex begats sex. Eventually you're going to get back to feeling more desire regularly if you treat it as a priority. I don't think couples should neglect this. I know sex isn't the *most* important thing..but I think it's like..the second most important thing IMO lol.
  • KristenAnn711
    KristenAnn711 Posts: 783
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    drink some wine.
    THIS. we shared a bottle over the weekend....turned out to be a REALLY good night ;-)

    I have a bottle in the fridge. That might do it.
  • mlemonroe2
    mlemonroe2 Posts: 603
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    Do it anyway (but don't let him know you're not that into it). The more you do it the more you want it. Plus, sex burns cals!!!! And works weird muscles you didn't know you had (no, not just those! ;))!!!! I think if you just start doing it anyway you'll get back into it.

    Having sex when I don't want to makes me feel gross. This may not be the way to go. But it does burn calories!! Is that listed in the database??? I'm going to look :love:
  • Cherrycandy
    Cherrycandy Posts: 200
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    Nope, your normal. When I started gaining all this weight my sex drive weny wayyyyy down,and I have always had an abnormally high sex drive for a woman, so it kinda freaked me out. I just had no desire at all, and my husband is super good looking and I went to the doctor about it. He told me it was simply my weight.Period. He said that when you gain weight like I had, it literally kills your libido. I think as women too, we are always thinking im fat, he is gonna think im fat, my stomach isnt flat, im not sexy at all, and your mind is the biggest sexual organ. We know that men are visual, and we can be insecure and especially when we gain weight. We think, "God, im fat and I cant stand the way I look, so I know he doesnt like it either", and we end up talking ourselves right out of the mood. When you arent happy with the way you look, depression plays a big part in it too.
  • kps1104
    kps1104 Posts: 58
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    I totally get it, I was the same way and still am at times. BUT when you start doing something good for yourself it shows and you then relate it towards him. Once I started working out and started to tone up (even if it is a little) I feel sexier and since I have lots a few lbs that I have been trying to lose forever and couldn't get past it, I felt way better about myself and hence I wanted to show him. I was confident :) So don't be too hard on yourself, I think we all go through it at one point or another, but do something for yourself, something that makes you feel good :) good luck!

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