Bite me, Couch to 5K - Week 3!
desweds
Posts: 126 Member
“Ding! Begin Walking”
The lady voice of Week 3, Day 1 of Couch to 5k wasn't reassuring as she commanded my 5-minute warm-up walk. I know what this day meant. I’d already looked ahead to what she was going to ask me to do today: FOUR THREE-MINUTE RUNS!?!?!?! ARE YOU FREAKING KIDDING ME?
For the record, two weeks ago I couldn't run half a block. Granted, by last week lady voice got me up to two-minute runs – which impressed the CRAP out of me – but now THREE MINUTES? My excuses-per-second generator speeds up as the first of the three-minute runs approach:
I’m 53! I'm morbidly obese! My joints hurt! I have a hiatal hernia! I'm diabetic!
“Ding! RUN!”
OK, you stupid smartphone app, I’ll run. Here I go. 13-minute pace. Slow. Who cares? I’m moving and that’s good enough. My feet go: plop, plop, plop. The cruel, uncaring app counts down the three-minute run:
“Ding! One Minute!”
WTF? That’s only one minute? I’ll never make three minutes. I’m dying here! I can’t get enough air! My heart rate is too high! Ouch, I stepped on a pebble! How the hell am I supposed to…Oh, look! A pretty girl…
“Ding! Two Minutes!”
My android phone must be powerful as it is clearly warping the space-time continuum cuz’ there is NO GOD DAMN WAY I've only been running for 120 seconds. But it’s OK as I know sweet death will soon wrap itself around me, my corpse left on the side of the street. Woodland creatures will walk by and quietly mourn me. I will be at peace. My head is spinning. Yet my feet are moving… time is lost on me…
COME TAKE ME BROTHER DEATH! INTO THY HANDS…
“Ding! Walk!”
Was...that…a ding I heard? Does that mean…I DID IT? I did! I ran for three minutes. Nee Ner Nee Ner! I’m walking now, breathing hard with hands on my hips. Recovering.
Meh. That was easy. Only three more of those? No problem.
Go away Brother Death. Mr. Healthy does not need you now!
The lady voice of Week 3, Day 1 of Couch to 5k wasn't reassuring as she commanded my 5-minute warm-up walk. I know what this day meant. I’d already looked ahead to what she was going to ask me to do today: FOUR THREE-MINUTE RUNS!?!?!?! ARE YOU FREAKING KIDDING ME?
For the record, two weeks ago I couldn't run half a block. Granted, by last week lady voice got me up to two-minute runs – which impressed the CRAP out of me – but now THREE MINUTES? My excuses-per-second generator speeds up as the first of the three-minute runs approach:
I’m 53! I'm morbidly obese! My joints hurt! I have a hiatal hernia! I'm diabetic!
“Ding! RUN!”
OK, you stupid smartphone app, I’ll run. Here I go. 13-minute pace. Slow. Who cares? I’m moving and that’s good enough. My feet go: plop, plop, plop. The cruel, uncaring app counts down the three-minute run:
“Ding! One Minute!”
WTF? That’s only one minute? I’ll never make three minutes. I’m dying here! I can’t get enough air! My heart rate is too high! Ouch, I stepped on a pebble! How the hell am I supposed to…Oh, look! A pretty girl…
“Ding! Two Minutes!”
My android phone must be powerful as it is clearly warping the space-time continuum cuz’ there is NO GOD DAMN WAY I've only been running for 120 seconds. But it’s OK as I know sweet death will soon wrap itself around me, my corpse left on the side of the street. Woodland creatures will walk by and quietly mourn me. I will be at peace. My head is spinning. Yet my feet are moving… time is lost on me…
COME TAKE ME BROTHER DEATH! INTO THY HANDS…
“Ding! Walk!”
Was...that…a ding I heard? Does that mean…I DID IT? I did! I ran for three minutes. Nee Ner Nee Ner! I’m walking now, breathing hard with hands on my hips. Recovering.
Meh. That was easy. Only three more of those? No problem.
Go away Brother Death. Mr. Healthy does not need you now!
163
Replies
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You are hilarious and awesome!! Good job on rockin' those three minutes out!!!7
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way to go!1
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Way to go...my sentiments exactly...although I do my run on the gym's treadmill with a 1% incline.
My first 3 minute run was brutal but then I managed the rest. Today will be my 1st day of week 4! OMG....I know I can do the 3 min run BUT 5 mins....we shall see...
So far I am enjoying the challenge of C25k! I am seeing results; trimming down and lost 6lbs with the help of MFP.6 -
Love this, you may have even inspired me to download the app
so well written and well done on your first 3 minute runs (I can't even do 1) 0 -
That was hilarious...Well done (on the writing and your achievement.)
Just wait till you get to Week 5...5 -
I can soooo relate to this. I did the C25K program from July to September and I thought week 6 would kill me. I was also a complete non-runner. Now I am running 4 miles every other day and trying to work toward 10k. Keep it up!11
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Awesome post! Great job for getting through!0
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Thank you for the laugh!! Good for you for staying with it!! One more win for Mr. Healthy!!0
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This is the best thing I've heard all day WAY TO GO!!!
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Love it! Every week is an accomplishment. Every week, your body does things you never thought possible. Way to go!0
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way to go congratulations! You are not the weakest link!0
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Love this so much! I'm redoing C25K for the zillionth time (laziness, Southern summer, pregnancy, etc.) and I know exactly how you feel, and will be feeling exactly like it in two weeks.
Excellent work!1 -
Love it! Great post and keep going strong on the C25K. You can do it! I completed this a couple months back and I never thought I would be able to do it. I just listened to the lady on the app (which on some days I liked and some days I hated!!) and kept going forward. My husband just finished the program last week as well. Poor husband though... he had two female voices telling him what to do during his runs!!! (me and the app) 1
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That was hilarious because I can totally relate.
What makes us listen to that silly lady?!0 -
That was so funny! I'm doing this program too and last night I told my kids that the best part about running is being done! They are too young and energetic to get it.2
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Love it!
Stay at it, it only gets easier and really helped me get the weight off. The closer you get to your proper weight the easier it gets. You will know you have this when you start to seek out hills. Good luck.0 -
Awesome! The killer one for me is when I suddenly had to do 20 minutes, non-stop... it seemed like an enormous jump!1
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I started c25k a little over a year ago. I dreaded every increase and was suffering to complete each week, and that was at a VERY slow "run" pace (14-15 minute mile). I didn't believe I would ever get up to 5k or faster than 12 minute miles.
About a month ago I ran a 7:10 mile. 5 miles is an easy, fun run now.
As the weight goes down, everything gets better. The more slow, slow, slow miles you put in, the faster you get. It's lovely how it works.6 -
haha! This was completely awesome! Bravo! I did not know there was an App!!!0
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I love this post not only for the honest humor of it but the reality of our getting started and not thinking we can do it and when we do we feel the glory of success ever so small. Good Job buddy1
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That is tooooo funny!!!!! Thank you for the laugh!0
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You're awesome. Week 4 was like this for me. I finished the program months ago. You can do it!0
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Wtg!
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Fantastic! And so spot on! I'm just finishing C25K (one more run until graduation!) and still berate the 5k101 guy with a lot of "you must be kidding me"s 0
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Hilarious! I've been feeling the same way about that app but I'm on week 7 now and determined to finish....no matter how slow I go! Great job!!0
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LOVE this!
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hahaha! Too funny and I remember that feeling when I did C25K!
Congrats on your progress.
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“Ding! Begin Walking”
The ladyvoice of Week 3, Day 1 of Couch to 5k wasn't reassuring as she commanded my 5 minute warm up walk. I know what this day meant. I’d already looked ahead to what she was going to ask me to do today: FOUR THREE-MINUTE RUNS!?!?!?! ARE YOU FREAKING KIDDING ME?
For the record, two weeks ago I couldn't run half a block. Granted, by last week ladyvoice got me up to two minutes runs – which impressed the CRAP out of me – but now THREE MINUTES? My excuses-per-second generator speeds up as the first of the three-minute runs approach:
I’m 53! I'm morbidly obese! My joints hurt! I have a hiatal hernia! I'm diabetic!
“Ding! RUN!”
OK, you stupid smartphone app, I’ll run. Here I go. 13 minute pace. Slow. Who cares? I’m moving and that’s good enough. My feet go: plop, plop, plop. The cruel, uncaring app counts down the three minute run:
“Ding! One Minute!”
WTF? That’s only one minute? I’ll never make three minutes. I’m dying here! I can’t get enough air! My heart rate is too high! Ouch, I stepped on a pebble! How the hell am I supposed to…Oh look! A pretty girl…
“Ding! Two Minutes!”
My android phone must be powerful as it is clearly warping the space time continuum cuz’ there is NO GOD DAMN WAY I've only been running for 120 seconds. But it’s OK as I know sweet death will soon wrap itself around me, my corpse left on the side of the street. Woodland creatures will walk by and quietly mourn me. I will be at peace. My head is spinning. Yet my feet are moving… time is lost on me…
COME TAKE ME BROTHER DEATH! INTO THY HANDS…
“Ding! Walk!”
Was...that…a ding I heard? Does that mean…I DID IT? I did! I ran three minutes. Nee Ner Nee Ner! I’m walking now, breathing hard with hands on my hips. Recovering.
Meh. That was easy. Only three more of those? No problem.
Go away Brother Death. Mr. Healthy does not need you now!
You are awesome! I cannot wait to read your account of when you run 5K, lol. And I know you'll do it.
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“Ding! Walk!”
Was...that…a ding I heard? Does that mean…I DID IT? I did! I ran three minutes. Nee Ner Nee Ner! I’m walking now, breathing hard with hands on my hips. Recovering.
Meh. That was easy. Only three more of those? No problem.
Go away Brother Death. Mr. Healthy does not need you now!
Ha ha! Love this. Great job Mr. Healthy. Keep it up.0
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