Weight Loss opposite sex attention?
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what's the difference?
Example. If I met the perfect girl, we connected in terms of personality, life goals etc. We are dating lets say, and one day she asks me to lose weight. At that point I don't mind because she is dating me, for me. If I have to lose weight for her to notice I exist, then no thanks.
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arditarose wrote: »EskimoMark wrote: »lookin4gains wrote: »Your attitude is already negative from the start. Not all women are the same. Lose the weight and date. If you notice they are superficial, then move on. Ex to the next until you find what you want. But give women the benefit of the doubt and a clean slate when you start dating them. You can't blame a woman for being attracted to you and giving you attention when you're thin. If you are overweight, a lot of women relate that to a poor work ethic and laziness. It's brutal, but it's the truth. It's how society is these days. And that kind of impression may affect their thought on how a relationship will be with you. Also, losing weight should be for you, no one else.
To be fair, I'm not negative at all. I'm just curious as to why all my potential interests end up in the same spot. In person, you would probably say I'm incredibly optimistic ( Least in public ). I haven't found a female yet that isn't superficial. Then why won't women give me a benefit of the doubt? It's one sided then.
I can blame a women for that. Because work ethic, a 3.72 GPA, outgoing in terms of the job fields. I could argue losing weight is for myself, but to be honest, I don't mind losing weight FOR a girl, but I mind losing weight to GET a girl.
Dude, now this is going to take me a minute to process.
I also can't believe you said you haven't met a woman who isn't superficial. That is asinine.
I don't blame you, but I haven't met anyone like that. It sounds rather harsh or doubtful, but I can assure you. It's yet to happen.
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EskimoMark wrote: »arditarose wrote: »lookin4gains wrote: »Your attitude is already negative from the start. Not all women are the same. Lose the weight and date. If you notice they are superficial, then move on. Ex to the next until you find what you want. But give women the benefit of the doubt and a clean slate when you start dating them. You can't blame a woman for being attracted to you and giving you attention when you're thin. If you are overweight, a lot of women relate that to a poor work ethic and laziness. It's brutal, but it's the truth. It's how society is these days. And that kind of impression may affect their thought on how a relationship will be with you. Also, losing weight should be for you, no one else.
Right, and spot on about being negative from the start. We don't like that.
It wouldn't make a difference if I approached you with an optimistic or pessimistic attitude because in the end you most likely will ignore me anyway.
Not necessarily. If you're overweight but handsome, play guitar, sing well, can cook, like old-timey music, have a silly sense of humor, a beard, a good taste in beer and whisky, and will take me to the opera...I'd give you a chance. Maybe you need to find the right women.0 -
arditarose wrote: »
Not necessarily. If you're overweight but handsome, play guitar, sing well, can cook, like old-timey music, have a silly sense of humor, a beard, a good taste in beer and whisky, and will take me to the opera...I'd give you a chance. Maybe you need to find the right women.
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arditarose wrote: »EskimoMark wrote: »arditarose wrote: »lookin4gains wrote: »Your attitude is already negative from the start. Not all women are the same. Lose the weight and date. If you notice they are superficial, then move on. Ex to the next until you find what you want. But give women the benefit of the doubt and a clean slate when you start dating them. You can't blame a woman for being attracted to you and giving you attention when you're thin. If you are overweight, a lot of women relate that to a poor work ethic and laziness. It's brutal, but it's the truth. It's how society is these days. And that kind of impression may affect their thought on how a relationship will be with you. Also, losing weight should be for you, no one else.
Right, and spot on about being negative from the start. We don't like that.
It wouldn't make a difference if I approached you with an optimistic or pessimistic attitude because in the end you most likely will ignore me anyway.
Not necessarily. If you're overweight but handsome, play guitar, sing well, can cook, like old-timey music, have a silly sense of humor, a beard, a good taste in beer and whisky, and will take me to the opera...I'd give you a chance. Maybe you need to find the right women.
Handsome and overweight don't go together. That is incredibly picky. Am I allowed to be that picky? Oh wait, all I ask is that she is going to complete college. That's pretty low.0 -
So, would you date a 300lb woman?0
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BusyRaeNOTBusty wrote: »So, would you date a 300lb woman?
Probably would, but even they are picky. They want some Brad Pitt looking guy.
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Ha, of course you can be that picky. Those are things I like. What do you like? Also, handsome and overweight can definitely go together. I have had big crushes on some overweight men. Big, burly, bad *kitten*, confident man...sure.EskimoMark wrote: »arditarose wrote: »EskimoMark wrote: »arditarose wrote: »lookin4gains wrote: »Your attitude is already negative from the start. Not all women are the same. Lose the weight and date. If you notice they are superficial, then move on. Ex to the next until you find what you want. But give women the benefit of the doubt and a clean slate when you start dating them. You can't blame a woman for being attracted to you and giving you attention when you're thin. If you are overweight, a lot of women relate that to a poor work ethic and laziness. It's brutal, but it's the truth. It's how society is these days. And that kind of impression may affect their thought on how a relationship will be with you. Also, losing weight should be for you, no one else.
Right, and spot on about being negative from the start. We don't like that.
It wouldn't make a difference if I approached you with an optimistic or pessimistic attitude because in the end you most likely will ignore me anyway.
Not necessarily. If you're overweight but handsome, play guitar, sing well, can cook, like old-timey music, have a silly sense of humor, a beard, a good taste in beer and whisky, and will take me to the opera...I'd give you a chance. Maybe you need to find the right women.
Handsome and overweight don't go together. That is incredibly picky. Am I allowed to be that picky? Oh wait, all I ask is that she is going to complete college. That's pretty low.0 -
BusyRaeNOTBusty wrote: »So, would you date a 300lb woman?
as long as she completed college.. because he obviously is prejudice against uneducated people.-1 -
EskimoMark wrote: »BusyRaeNOTBusty wrote: »So, would you date a 300lb woman?
Probably would, but even they are picky. They want some Brad Pitt looking guy.
Oh my word. Your attitude is the problem my friend. I've known people like you. It's hard, I know. And whatever is causing you to think so negatively is not easy to fix. But you should lose the weight for yourself, love yourself, and the women will flock. As long as you're not a butt head or very boring.0 -
I've dropped >20 lbs in the past three months, I've noticed I'm getting a few more looks from the ladies. I don't mind one bit. Whatever. If it bothers you, you're probably complaining to the wrong bunch here.0
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arditarose wrote: »
Ha, of course you can be that picky. Those are things I like. What do you like? Also, handsome and overweight can definitely go together. I have had big crushes on some overweight men. Big, burly, bad *kitten*, confident man...sure.EskimoMark wrote: »arditarose wrote: »EskimoMark wrote: »arditarose wrote: »lookin4gains wrote: »Your attitude is already negative from the start. Not all women are the same. Lose the weight and date. If you notice they are superficial, then move on. Ex to the next until you find what you want. But give women the benefit of the doubt and a clean slate when you start dating them. You can't blame a woman for being attracted to you and giving you attention when you're thin. If you are overweight, a lot of women relate that to a poor work ethic and laziness. It's brutal, but it's the truth. It's how society is these days. And that kind of impression may affect their thought on how a relationship will be with you. Also, losing weight should be for you, no one else.
Right, and spot on about being negative from the start. We don't like that.
It wouldn't make a difference if I approached you with an optimistic or pessimistic attitude because in the end you most likely will ignore me anyway.
Not necessarily. If you're overweight but handsome, play guitar, sing well, can cook, like old-timey music, have a silly sense of humor, a beard, a good taste in beer and whisky, and will take me to the opera...I'd give you a chance. Maybe you need to find the right women.
Handsome and overweight don't go together. That is incredibly picky. Am I allowed to be that picky? Oh wait, all I ask is that she is going to complete college. That's pretty low.
I'll be honest, with you if I was that picky I would get yelled at, and be named a superficial person. Not many females are going to fill my niche unless I look like a supermodel then maybe I can find a female who is 90% identical to the things I like.0 -
I dunno about all that. I'm intensely attracted to a guy who is not very fit, struggles with acne, and has thinning hair. I love his personality, his compassion, his sense of humor. I'm actually losing weight in hopes he will want me, because I don't meet his physical standards, which is a little ironic, but I figure it can't hurt to be fit whether it works on him or not.0
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Wow... Talk about judgmental!0
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BusyRaeNOTBusty wrote: »So, would you date a 300lb woman?
as long as she completed college.. because he obviously is prejudice against uneducated people.
For real.
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BusyRaeNOTBusty wrote: »So, would you date a 300lb woman?
as long as she completed college.. because he obviously is prejudice against uneducated people.
That's my only thing I ask for. That isn't picky at all. Compared to that one girl who listed about 10 things I need to just have a chance IS picky.0 -
from a human psychological stand point we're BOTH (men and women) programmed to naturally go after fit and healthy looking mates to produce the best off spring. If you were in the wilds hunting for food you wouldn't want a fat slob who couldn't hunt and such for you.
If you have trust issues than I suggest a therapist?0 -
EskimoMark wrote: »arditarose wrote: »
Ha, of course you can be that picky. Those are things I like. What do you like? Also, handsome and overweight can definitely go together. I have had big crushes on some overweight men. Big, burly, bad *kitten*, confident man...sure.EskimoMark wrote: »arditarose wrote: »EskimoMark wrote: »arditarose wrote: »lookin4gains wrote: »Your attitude is already negative from the start. Not all women are the same. Lose the weight and date. If you notice they are superficial, then move on. Ex to the next until you find what you want. But give women the benefit of the doubt and a clean slate when you start dating them. You can't blame a woman for being attracted to you and giving you attention when you're thin. If you are overweight, a lot of women relate that to a poor work ethic and laziness. It's brutal, but it's the truth. It's how society is these days. And that kind of impression may affect their thought on how a relationship will be with you. Also, losing weight should be for you, no one else.
Right, and spot on about being negative from the start. We don't like that.
It wouldn't make a difference if I approached you with an optimistic or pessimistic attitude because in the end you most likely will ignore me anyway.
Not necessarily. If you're overweight but handsome, play guitar, sing well, can cook, like old-timey music, have a silly sense of humor, a beard, a good taste in beer and whisky, and will take me to the opera...I'd give you a chance. Maybe you need to find the right women.
Handsome and overweight don't go together. That is incredibly picky. Am I allowed to be that picky? Oh wait, all I ask is that she is going to complete college. That's pretty low.
I'll be honest, with you if I was that picky I would get yelled at, and be named a superficial person. Not many females are going to fill my niche unless I look like a supermodel then maybe I can find a female who is 90% identical to the things I like.
What? First of all, I was poking and making a little fun. But it is important for me to have a lot in common with a man and I know what I like. You should too. Why would it be superficial for me to be interested in a man for what he does/is interested in and not his looks. You're getting all turned around now my friend.
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arditarose wrote: »EskimoMark wrote: »BusyRaeNOTBusty wrote: »So, would you date a 300lb woman?
Probably would, but even they are picky. They want some Brad Pitt looking guy.
Oh my word. Your attitude is the problem my friend. I've known people like you. It's hard, I know. And whatever is causing you to think so negatively is not easy to fix. But you should lose the weight for yourself, love yourself, and the women will flock. As long as you're not a butt head or very boring.
The thing is, I'm not boring at all. I'm very social in clubs, fairly large friend groups. It's just I have zero relationships coming my way because I'm too big. (Yes I had girls say this before) I don't think it's fair that they would date me, but because I'm big, it means a 100% no even though I have a good ( Bias ) 10+ positive traits about myself.
Yeah my attitude is a problem, but then again after about 20+ Rejections including some bad ones, do you blame me?
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EskimoMark wrote: »BusyRaeNOTBusty wrote: »So, would you date a 300lb woman?
as long as she completed college.. because he obviously is prejudice against uneducated people.
That's my only thing I ask for. That isn't picky at all. Compared to that one girl who listed about 10 things I need to just have a chance IS picky.
I listed those things, but I've also gone out with a plumber. He was very smart and handsome. He didn't have those other things I listed either.0
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