Food and Parenting

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Replies

  • PRMinx
    PRMinx Posts: 4,585 Member
    PRMinx wrote: »
    PRMinx wrote: »
    I'm still waiting for data that indicates "this generation" (whatever that means) is going to have a shorter life span...

    I have read that - but it was in relation to kids today not doing enough exercise so they would have a shorter life span.

    I think it's fair to say that kids aren't as active today...but I doubt there is data forecasting life spans for "kids today." Again, what does that even mean? Are we talking Millennials? Children of Millennials?

    I read it in a quote from Sebastian Coe, so I don't know where he got it from. I don't know what a millennial is I'm afraid.

    Millennials/Gen Y - born between 1980 and 2000's. Millennials are just starting to have kids now, so I doubt there is sufficient data on their activity levels, health or life span. I think the idea that you can forecast life span at all is pretty bunk.

  • Sarauk2sf
    Sarauk2sf Posts: 28,072 Member
    I was over at a friend's one day a year or two ago, and I noticed that she gave her 2 year old a microwaved frozen dinner consisting of chicken fingers and fries. I didn't say anything to her, but later I was at my Mom's and I said something like "How can she give such a young child food that is so terrible for her?!" My Mom, wisely, said never to judge until you have kids of your own... then you will get it. I'm sure she is right. It is hard for me to see two obese parents feeding their child food that might make her overweight too someday, but you know what... it's none of my business.

    Chicken fingers and fries may make them overweight but a highly caloric meal that is not 'processed' will not?

  • Sarauk2sf
    Sarauk2sf Posts: 28,072 Member
    PRMinx wrote: »
    skirch01 wrote: »
    I agree with you, OP, and am very surprised at the hostile responses you have received. And I am a parent. I am trying to cook more and buy less processed foods, for the very reasons you mentioned.

    Hostile? Which responses were hostile?

    Asking someone to substantiate their claims is not being hostile.


    Unless hostile = do not agree with now.
  • Francl27
    Francl27 Posts: 26,371 Member
    I was over at a friend's one day a year or two ago, and I noticed that she gave her 2 year old a microwaved frozen dinner consisting of chicken fingers and fries. I didn't say anything to her, but later I was at my Mom's and I said something like "How can she give such a young child food that is so terrible for her?!" My Mom, wisely, said never to judge until you have kids of your own... then you will get it. I'm sure she is right. It is hard for me to see two obese parents feeding their child food that might make her overweight too someday, but you know what... it's none of my business.

    Because one frozen meal is going to make kids fat.

    Ok then. I guess that's why I was fat, lol.
  • Dnarules
    Dnarules Posts: 2,081 Member
    SideSteel wrote: »
    It's not food... It's artificial chemicals and highly processed crap that kills, which is why this current generation is said to have a shorter life span than there parents. What I mean by a diverse diet is a diet with real food... fruits, vegetables, etc.

    It IS food. You can hold any belief you want but the fact is that you can survive entirely on processed foods. You get nutrients from it and those nutrients are utilized.

    Do you have any evidence that our life spans are getting shorter? I'd love to see that.

    Finally, if you have concerns about specific "chemicals", then which ones are you concerned with?

    I mean to offend no one. I fully understand what it's like to grow up and all that was there was highly processed crap because my parents were not properly educated when it comes to nutrition and had the mindset they did not have the money to buy real food. It is possible to eat healthy on a budget but its not easy which I am aware of.

    That depends on your budget and the size of your family.

    This, and I would also add location. There are areas in the US that simply do not have the access to fresh food that most of us take for granted.
  • apparations
    apparations Posts: 264 Member
    Sarauk2sf wrote: »
    I was over at a friend's one day a year or two ago, and I noticed that she gave her 2 year old a microwaved frozen dinner consisting of chicken fingers and fries. I didn't say anything to her, but later I was at my Mom's and I said something like "How can she give such a young child food that is so terrible for her?!" My Mom, wisely, said never to judge until you have kids of your own... then you will get it. I'm sure she is right. It is hard for me to see two obese parents feeding their child food that might make her overweight too someday, but you know what... it's none of my business.

    Chicken fingers and fries may make them overweight but a highly caloric meal that is not 'processed' will not?

    Not at all. In fact, highly caloric meals that are not processed is what made ME fat. My point above was that it's easy to judge, and I was wrong to do so.
  • Alluminati
    Alluminati Posts: 6,208 Member
    edited January 2015
    Sarauk2sf wrote: »
    I was over at a friend's one day a year or two ago, and I noticed that she gave her 2 year old a microwaved frozen dinner consisting of chicken fingers and fries. I didn't say anything to her, but later I was at my Mom's and I said something like "How can she give such a young child food that is so terrible for her?!" My Mom, wisely, said never to judge until you have kids of your own... then you will get it. I'm sure she is right. It is hard for me to see two obese parents feeding their child food that might make her overweight too someday, but you know what... it's none of my business

    Chicken fingers and fries may make them overweight but a highly caloric meal that is not 'processed' will not?

    Not at all. In fact, highly caloric meals that are not processed is what made ME fat. My point above was that it's easy to judge, and I was wrong to do so.

    Then you judged, again, on the way out. Lol.
  • 970Mikaela1
    970Mikaela1 Posts: 2,013 Member
    My 10 year old eats what she wants. She Rock climbs 4x a week. Swims 1x a week. Does gymnastics 2x a week. She makes smart choices that include cookies, ice cream ,fruit and even some veggies. She is highly aware of counting calories because I have done it for three years. Food is food. Some choices are better than others. Who would want to be the one that starts a child down the the path of disordered eating habits? I prefer to teach her moderation and being active = eat all the food you love.
  • jams0411
    jams0411 Posts: 16 Member
    i sort of understand what you're trying to say OP but since you don't have kids and the way you post it some people may find it offensive or just wrong if it is the case.

    im gonna say my personal experience, i can tell you this; i grew up in a non american family plus my contact with usa was summer/christmas vacation and last year i spend the whole year there, what i can tell you and by no way it's me trying to be judgmental it's how surprise i was with things that i saw parents buying to children, my day to day there i could appreciate with friends, coworkers and family etc. i guess it's different because i live in a third world country and having ice cream, cake, all those types of juice and those things that i suppose you are including in your list as "chemical crap" was not there, eating fast food was something that i did have maybeee twice a month and that it's whats normal for me and what i intend to pass on my children, but again that's me and my circumstance and sometimes even when we are not aware in many ways we've become our parents, and we teach or raise our children the same wewere.

    p.s not trying to implied U.S people eat worst or have any study that confirms that but since i've being able to live in a couple of places you definitely can appreciate the difference from culture to culture.
  • sophomorelove
    sophomorelove Posts: 193 Member
    I am on the fence about this. I remember I used to sneak sugar by the spoonful as a kid whenever I could. I only got to eat candy in other people's homes, or on holidays, so I learned that treats = fun and excitement. I could not understand how at some of my friends' houses there were bowls of fruit and candy on the table and they could eat it any time they wanted but they didn't becasue they knew it was always there. The only rule was not to snack within one hour before a meal. 20 years later, I am still working on knocking treats off the pedestal. But as a mom, I see where you are coming from. It is our responsibility to take care of our kids, and give them the best nutrition available.
  • randomtai
    randomtai Posts: 9,003 Member
    In for non parents telling parents how to feed their children. :yawn:
  • DawnieB1977
    DawnieB1977 Posts: 4,248 Member
    I have three children. My youngest is a baby and all the food she eats is homemade, just puréed sweet potato, carrot, apple and pear, stew etc.

    My other two are 5.5 and 3.5 and they're pretty good and they eat what we eat, and their favourite dinners are chicken or fish with carrots and broccoli, chicken curry and jacket potato and tuna, but they'll also eat stir fry, spaghetti bolognaise etc. We make pretty much everything from scratch.

    They do like chocolate though, and crisps...they're kids. We don't buy it often, but occasionally they'll have a little kinder egg or something. What we usually do is make a cake/cookies on a Friday after getting back from school with my eldest.

    They talk about what's healthy and they have an understanding of what's good for you, and what's not, but they still have treats from time to time, like fish 'n' chips, an ice cream on the seafront, that kind of thing. I think they've got pretty good eating habits. I've told them everything is ok in moderation, that a little bit of chocolate is ok, but lots of chocolate is not.

    I'm not into fast food myself, so they've only been to McDonald's once, with my MIL.

    I'm luckily to still be on maternity leave so it makes it easier, but when I'm back at work it'll be harder. I've been fine up to now, although we did have some quick cook pasta last year when I was pregnant and exhausted. My husband does shift work so one week in two I'm on my own for the evening routine.

    My kids are also very active. We walk everywhere, and they have scooters. We live right by the sea so we go to the beach a lot, and they ride their scooters on the seafront.

    However, I don't think it's fair to judge parents when you're not a parent yourself. I do plenty of things as parent that I said I'd never do.
  • drabbits3
    drabbits3 Posts: 140 Member
    I am a parent--2 boys ages 13 and 15 and we are all vegetarians. Thank goodness my boys are not picky and have no food allergies or issues BUT it does have something to do with what I fed them. They ate versions of what we ate, never bought a jar of baby food BUT I didn't work, so I had the time to cook healthy food for us. Here's the thing--if we don't buy junk food it won't be in the house to eat. I do agree with the OP that said if we (the parents) won't eat the crap food why would we buy it for the kids? That I agree with. Having said that, some junk food never killed anyone. My oldest son is on the swim team and over this holiday break he had swim team practice literally four hours a day. Pretty sure that pint of Ben and Jerry's got burned right off and he needs the sheer calories. And the older they get the less control I have about what they eat. I will say they have never been to a McDonald's/Taco Bell/Burger King/KFC--those places are total crap food and are destroying the world (sort of kidding--please don't jump all over that remark!!!!). Bottom line--don't judge until you have kids BUT make good choices and realize the consequences of them.
  • ValerieMartini2Olives
    ValerieMartini2Olives Posts: 3,024 Member
    Before I was a parent, I said I will never give my kids Kraft Mac and Cheese or Chef Boyardee and things like that. I make a lot of food from scratch. Well guess what? My two year old doesn't like oatmeal raisin cookies. She doesn't like chicken stir fry. She doesn't like scratch mac and cheese. She likes saltine crackers, Oreo cookies, and cheez-its. She also loves blackberries, applesauce, and Greek yogurt. Children are fickle people. I hate wasting food and I waste a ton when I force my daughter to eat what I'm eating. It's just not going to happen. Whether it's blackberries or saltines, at least she's eating and can finally tell me what she wants to eat.
  • mirrim52
    mirrim52 Posts: 763 Member
    edited January 2015
    My sister's friend wouldn't let her kid eat any sugary treats. As soon as she was old enough to visit friends' houses, guess what she did? Gorged on junk food in secret. How is that a healthy relationship with food?

    We eat healthy balanced meals as a family, but she can still have a cookie for dessert. She isn't even 5 yet, loves sushi and even sashimi, chicken stir fry is her favorite meal, fruit, veggies, and cheese are her go to snacks, but she still has McDonald's from time to time. She also swims and is learning to skate and play hockey. She wants to play hockey like Dad and play roller derby like Mom. That is how we set a good example, by letting her see us be active and choosing a good variety of healthy foods, with the occasional treat, not by banning the things her friends get to have.

    PS - Everything is made up of chemicals. Water is a chemical. "Full of chemicals" is basically synonymous with existing.
  • Alluminati
    Alluminati Posts: 6,208 Member
    Before I was a parent, I said I will never give my kids Kraft Mac and Cheese or Chef Boyardee and things like that. I make a lot of food from scratch. Well guess what? My two year old doesn't like oatmeal raisin cookies. She doesn't like chicken stir fry. She doesn't like scratch mac and cheese. She likes saltine crackers, Oreo cookies, and cheez-its. She also loves blackberries, applesauce, and Greek yogurt. Children are fickle people. I hate wasting food and I waste a ton when I force my daughter to eat what I'm eating. It's just not going to happen. Whether it's blackberries or saltines, at least she's eating and can finally tell me what she wants to eat.

    I think our kids are related :/
  • randomtai
    randomtai Posts: 9,003 Member
    drabbits3 wrote: »
    I will say they have never been to a McDonald's/Taco Bell/Burger King/KFC--those places are total crap food and are destroying the world (sort of kidding--please don't jump all over that remark!!!!). Bottom line--don't judge until you have kids BUT make good choices and realize the consequences of them.

    Yeah... no.
  • PRMinx
    PRMinx Posts: 4,585 Member
    mirrim52 wrote: »
    My sister's friend wouldn't let her kid eat any sugary treats. As soon as she was old enough to visit friends' houses, guess what she did? Gorged on junk food in secret. How is that a healthy relationship with food?

    We eat healthy balanced meals as a family, but she can still have a cookie for dessert. She isn't even 5 yet, loves sushi and even sashimi, chicken stir fry is her favorite meal, fruit, veggies, and cheese are her go to snacks, but she still has McDonald's from time to time. She also swims and is learning to skate and play hockey. She wants to play hockey like Dad and play roller derby like Mom. That is how we set a good example, by letting her see us be active and choosing a good variety of healthy foods, with the occasional treat, not by banning the things her friends get to have.

    Oh you stop it with all that logic now....
  • brower47
    brower47 Posts: 16,356 Member
    I hear this so much and it really boggles my mind. When I hear a parent who is trying to have a more active and heathy life say well I buy those special treats for my kids. So it's ok for your children to eat that crap that is so called food and not you? Don't you want your children to grow up and have a healthy relationship with real food? Gogurt is not a food, little debbie cakes are not food, sugary fruit snack are not food. I want my future kids to love eating vegetables and fruits and have a diverse food palate.

    Any thoughts?

    Since you asked, my thoughts:

    You don't know what food is.

    You don't understand the concept of the whole diet being the key. You can't see the forest for the trees.

    A child that is a healthy weight and getting all their nutritional requirements met can have the treats that their overweight parent might not be able to currently afford dietarily.

    If you want children to have a healthy relationship with food, pretending that some food you arbitrarily decided isn't food isn't going to accomplish that goal.

    If you're not the parent, butt out. Look inside and fix your own issues before you even think about maligning others for the ones you perceive in them.
  • zoeysasha37
    zoeysasha37 Posts: 7,088 Member
    Sarauk2sf wrote: »
    I think that you may have the concept of 'healthy relationship with food' confused.

    I also think that you may have the concept of 'food' confused.

    This!!!!!
  • brower47
    brower47 Posts: 16,356 Member
    PRMinx wrote: »
    skirch01 wrote: »
    I agree with you, OP, and am very surprised at the hostile responses you have received. And I am a parent. I am trying to cook more and buy less processed foods, for the very reasons you mentioned.

    Hostile? Which responses were hostile?

    Asking someone to substantiate their claims is not being hostile.

    Don't you know that anything short of complete agreement is today's "hostile".

  • Mr_Knight
    Mr_Knight Posts: 9,532 Member
    I want my future kids to...

    So...you don't actually have any actual kids of your own yet...?

    I see.

    Explains everything.

  • Francl27
    Francl27 Posts: 26,371 Member
    Before I was a parent, I said I will never give my kids Kraft Mac and Cheese or Chef Boyardee and things like that. I make a lot of food from scratch. Well guess what? My two year old doesn't like oatmeal raisin cookies. She doesn't like chicken stir fry. She doesn't like scratch mac and cheese. She likes saltine crackers, Oreo cookies, and cheez-its. She also loves blackberries, applesauce, and Greek yogurt. Children are fickle people. I hate wasting food and I waste a ton when I force my daughter to eat what I'm eating. It's just not going to happen. Whether it's blackberries or saltines, at least she's eating and can finally tell me what she wants to eat.

    YES. Gosh we make cookies from scratch and they'll have a couple then I have to eat them before they go bad because they don't want them anymore. Half the baked goods I've made they didn't even want to taste (and guess who ends up eating them? Yeah the person who really shouldn't). At least the oreo cookies will still be good in their little package in a week when they feel like having some again.

    Another hilarious (not so much at the time) anecdote is that I was that mom who would never buy baby food and just make my own baby food. So I bought a lot of veggies and fruit and made a ton of baby food... and they totally refused to eat it. I don't know if it had too much flavor or if they didn't like the texture or what... But I had to buy baby food. And they ate peas and carrots and sweet potatoes and whatnot from a jar just fine.

    And after years of offering them veggies they never ate, the only thing that worked was to bribe them with dessert (typically one of those 40 calories fruit/veggie popsicle) if they ate their veggies... and now they like most of them.
  • jfp420
    jfp420 Posts: 186 Member
    I am a fairly healthy eater and have two boys. I made both baby food from scratch and made sure to offer them smaller portions of whatever my husband and I had for dinner. It worked with the first one. He eats fruit, veggies and all sorts of ethnic foods. The younger decided that he only likes a few varieties of pasta, bananas and chicken fingers. He only drinks chocolate milk. People said when he gets hungry he will eat whatever we serve him but he will not. And since he is borderline underweight I need to make sure he is getting enough calories. Hopefully one day he will become more open to different foods and we continue to offer them. Some things are easier said than done!
  • HeidiCooksSupper
    HeidiCooksSupper Posts: 3,831 Member
    edited January 2015
    I watched my healthy eating sister-in-law raise three kids to believe that hi-sugar processed foods are TREATS not an expectation. So, if a child came into the kitchen and wanted a snack, they were steered to the fruit bowl. Ice cream, iced cakes, etc. were party food to be enjoyed on birthdays and the like. She taught them to have the same balanced view of food she does. When one of them stated at age 11 that she was a vegetarian, her mother taught her how to do it in a healthy way. She is still a vegetarian, was a Division One athlete, and is the only person I know who can wear one of those 'sausage-casing' dresses without a single wayward lump. I've stayed out of these discussions because I've never raised a child but it strikes me raising your kids on hot dogs and tater tots and to raise so many of them to "hate vegetables" in adulthood does them no favors at all.
  • runnerchick69
    runnerchick69 Posts: 317 Member
    OP - if you didn't have a point people wouldn't get so hot and bothered by it :)
  • Sarauk2sf
    Sarauk2sf Posts: 28,072 Member
    I watched my healthy eating sister-in-law raise three kids to believe that hi-sugar processed foods are TREATS not an expectation. So, if a child came into the kitchen and wanted a snack, they were steered to the fruit bowl. Ice cream, iced cakes, etc. were party food to be enjoyed on birthdays and the like. She taught them to have the same balanced view of food she does. When one of them stated at age 11 that she was a vegetarian, her mother taught her how to do it in a healthy way. She is still a vegetarian, was a Division One athlete, and is the only person I know who can wear one of those 'sausage-casing' dresses without a single wayward lump. I've stayed out of these discussions because I've never raised a child but it strikes me raising your kids on hot dogs and tater tots and to raise so many of them to "hate vegetables" in adulthood does them no favors at all.

    There is a very big difference between 'raising your kids on hot dogs and tater tots and to raise so many of them to "hate vegetables"' and allowing some processed and/or less nutrient dense foods into their diet here and there.

  • lawlifehanna
    lawlifehanna Posts: 90 Member
    I grew up in a house were there was no candy, no soda and no chips. Dessert in the weekends consists of a piece of dark chocolate or plain vanilla ice cream with jam my aunt made from fresh berries. Of course we had candy, cookies etc. for birthdays, Christmas, Easter etc., but that was it.

    I'm 23 and started gaining weight immediately when I moved out as an 18-year-old. I hadn't learned how to control my portions with unhealthy food.

    I do have a more diverse food palate than some of my (healthy) friends, but I'm also the person who eats all the chocolate because I didn't learn portion control as a kid (I didn't need to, an active kid just doesn't get overweight eating lean meat and salads).

    Would I have been just as healthy as kid if I had candy/chips/whatever I wanted more often? Probably. Would I be healthier now, if I had had those things as a kid and thus learned to control myself with them? Probably. Does any of this matter in the bigger sense of parenting and raising children to be healthy and good people? I don't think so. If somebody else is raising their child in a way you don't agree with, but their child is safe, keep your mouth shut. Parenting is for parents, it says so right in the name.
  • Tblackdogs
    Tblackdogs Posts: 326 Member
    All very interesting posts. Bottom line to me is that the OP feels strongly about what she feels is healthy eating and hopes to feed her future children that way some day. Fine. As many others have pointed out, we all have our views of "healthy" eating. And as many others have pointed out, kids are people too. Yes if you offer vegetables your kids might eat them. But while one kid in my family loves my very healthy homemade beef stew, the other literally gags when I make him try it. I don't have any idea why! The best we parents can do is model good behavior (INCLUDING NOT BEING CRAZY ABOUT EVERY MORSEL WE PUT IN OUR MOUTHS!) and talk about making good choices about what we put in our bodies. Sure, have a few Oreos, but then go play frisbee or kickball with the neighborhood kids for awhile. That's what my kids do naturally and if I did that more often, I wouldn't have a squishy midsection. Maybe we can learn from our kids instead of always being the ones to teach them!
  • WinoGelato
    WinoGelato Posts: 13,454 Member
    My kids had blueberry pancakes for breakfast, grilled cheese with pretzels and strawberries for lunch and guess what, they will probably have easy mac and baby carrots and apple slices for dinner. Do the Easy Mac and Kraft singles.negate the blueberries, strawberries, apples and carrots because they are processed?

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