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We broke up because...
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He couldn't keep up
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Always complained that I couldnt keep up...0
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expensive taste0
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She always threw my money around to buy things0
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she ran off with somes dog0
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She has a wheres waldo fetish0
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Doesn't share the mirror0
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She beat me up0
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You liked it0
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But did you have to make me where the dress?!0
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You said you wanted to try something new0
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I actually LOLed for that0
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Haha Good0
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we fought over whose tatts were better0
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I hid my tats it was always a competition0
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she had no friends and relied on me to entertain her all day0
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He would get mad when I twisted his nipples0
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They found my twinkie stash0
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And wouldn't share the twinkies0
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Made me run a 5k for one twinkie, then denied it once I'd finished :(0
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I didnt like twinkies so it was never going to work0
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i told her i preferred playboy bunnies0
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I wasn't a playboy bunny0
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Shaved my tail because it had too much "bounce"0
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Bestiality isn't legal in this state0
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I took up carrot farming.0
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Stayed on that side of the pool all day0
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He was too naive0
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Good thing you are not shy0
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