Online Dating
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Funny that this guy would come up in convo with kiddo and I tonight..but had another horror story, from a couple years ago. He was just a nightmare in all sorts of ways...long story short, to summarize the madness...on our 3rd date after ranting that theres no pleasing women, how is ex wife left him because hes too controlling...he then told me not to talk during dinner because my food will get cold. When dropping me off at my apt building he asked me to move in with him. (Dates 1 & 2 were also strange, but I was in a "dont reject right away, give a guy a chance" mode...Date #3 was the final straw.)
We only talked once after that...a heated argument where I decided I had enough and told him not to contact me again. He started sending me youtube videos of love songs saying it made him think of me, how much he loves me and he cries for me and what he lost..or angry emails that I was throwing everything away and being stupid. I never responded to any of them..but the videos kept coming, at least a couple a week for several months, every so often a long email begging me to talk to him and see him again or telling me off.
Not only was he a jerk, but he was obsessive, and Im sure if I ever agreed to see him again, youd be watching this story on Lifetime Movie or some forensics show, cause the guy was beyond unstable.0 -
All of them, it usually starts with arriving and a male has yet again over estimated their height!
One of my big pet peeves since I'm pretty tall as it is. Now, I just assume that they're 2 inches shorter than they listed and I'm usually right lol! Though the last guy I dated had a height listed that was about 1-2 inches shorter than his actual height.
If women can knock 3-5 years off their age and 50lbs off their weight, then nobody can be surprised if men eventually start telling the same lies about their physical attributes. Your assumption is probably accurate as I've noticed that most women are 3 years older and about 20lbs heavier than they claim in their profiles.
Internet liars everywhere!
PS - I AM 5ft 8ins. That's undateably short and no amount of embellishment is going to change that!!!
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wolfsbayne wrote: »heathbilly wrote: »lol some damn , these are some horrible stories.
Yeah, but I have heard some good ones. I only know 1 person that has had good luck, but you never know until you go out there and try.
I just get frustrated at the amount of people I message and then don't get a response back. I actually spend time reading the profiles and message with something related to that...for example, found a guy a few days ago, good looking, seems nice, we "match" and he spent two weeks in Italy last year, posted pictures, talked about how he loved to travel, etc. I lived in Italy for four years, so I messaged him about what a beautiful country it was, how I liked some of his pics from the trip (I swear, it wasn't creepy), asked what country he wanted to travel to next, etc. Not one comment back.
Frustrating.
Very frustrating. I rarely message guys but when I do, this always seems to happen (even when they've "matched" me). It's not really like they're out of my league or anything either. I understand that guys have their own preferences but you would think that the odds of them answering would be pretty good since 90% of the guys I message already matched me.
I'm guessing it's equally frustrating for the guys who don't receive messages back.
It ends up being pretty soul-destroying! Nobody likes to be blanked just for breaking the ice in a friendly manner.
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Funny that this guy would come up in convo with kiddo and I tonight..but had another horror story, from a couple years ago. He was just a nightmare in all sorts of ways...long story short, to summarize the madness...on our 3rd date after ranting that theres no pleasing women, how is ex wife left him because hes too controlling...he then told me not to talk during dinner because my food will get cold. When dropping me off at my apt building he asked me to move in with him. (Dates 1 & 2 were also strange, but I was in a "dont reject right away, give a guy a chance" mode...Date #3 was the final straw.)
Not only was he a jerk, but he was obsessive, and Im sure if I ever agreed to see him again, youd be watching this story on Lifetime Movie or some forensics show, cause the guy was beyond unstable.
I would love to find out whatever happened to this nutjob0 -
All of them, it usually starts with arriving and a male has yet again over estimated their height!
One of my big pet peeves since I'm pretty tall as it is. Now, I just assume that they're 2 inches shorter than they listed and I'm usually right lol! Though the last guy I dated had a height listed that was about 1-2 inches shorter than his actual height.
If women can knock 3-5 years off their age and 50lbs off their weight, then nobody can be surprised if men eventually start telling the same lies about their physical attributes. Your assumption is probably accurate as I've noticed that most women are 3 years older and about 20lbs heavier than they claim in their profiles.
Internet liars everywhere!
PS - I AM 5ft 8ins. That's undateably short and no amount of embellishment is going to change that!!!
lol try being 5'4. I'd give anythign to be 5'8 haha. If I can get ladies you should have no problem at 5'8
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Can I just say.....it sucks.
Worst date with someone you met online...GO!!!
Some of these are pretty bad and ive had bad ones but the worst was a guy i picked up for our first date and he was drinking already. He continued to drink majers mark straight when we got to the restaurant/bar. My friends were playing in the band that night. I was very put off and i let him know that nothing was happening between us. I told him this because he kept leering at me. Then he sat down and texted me even though i was right beside him. He said, "it's all about the oral". Now, that did it. I called a cab to come get him and had one of my sizable friends help me get him in it. He called two hrs later and chastised me for being rude! I told him he made me feel unsafe and he's lucky i didn't just bail. At least i got him home. Anyway that's the worst. Lol.0 -
All of them, it usually starts with arriving and a male has yet again over estimated their height!
One of my big pet peeves since I'm pretty tall as it is. Now, I just assume that they're 2 inches shorter than they listed and I'm usually right lol! Though the last guy I dated had a height listed that was about 1-2 inches shorter than his actual height.
If women can knock 3-5 years off their age and 50lbs off their weight, then nobody can be surprised if men eventually start telling the same lies about their physical attributes. Your assumption is probably accurate as I've noticed that most women are 3 years older and about 20lbs heavier than they claim in their profiles.
Internet liars everywhere!
PS - I AM 5ft 8ins. That's undateably short and no amount of embellishment is going to change that!!!
5'8" isn't undateable in my book. I'm not sure why people lie about physical attributes since a meeting will be in order.
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wolfsbayne wrote: »All of them, it usually starts with arriving and a male has yet again over estimated their height!
One of my big pet peeves since I'm pretty tall as it is. Now, I just assume that they're 2 inches shorter than they listed and I'm usually right lol! Though the last guy I dated had a height listed that was about 1-2 inches shorter than his actual height.
If women can knock 3-5 years off their age and 50lbs off their weight, then nobody can be surprised if men eventually start telling the same lies about their physical attributes. Your assumption is probably accurate as I've noticed that most women are 3 years older and about 20lbs heavier than they claim in their profiles.
Internet liars everywhere!
PS - I AM 5ft 8ins. That's undateably short and no amount of embellishment is going to change that!!!
5'8" isn't undateable in my book. I'm not sure why people lie about physical attributes since a meeting will be in order.
Agreed, I'm short, and I put it. Do I get filtered out by most searches yeah, but what am i gonna do put on some 70's platforms when I meet up?0 -
It's nice to hear this from both sides of the keyboard (thanks Belle8312 for launching this discussion).
I talked with quite a few and met 3 ppl and quit - I figured that I needed some serious re-evaluation of my motivation, if that was what I would find. The specifics for my encounters are not too horrid. It may be best to say that the ladies I met probably exist in every society, and I'd be more comfortable without any of them being incorporated in my immediate social circle.
One thing I did find to be nearly axiomatic in the whole thing was that everyone seems to overstate their position in some fashion. Those people that indicated that they were sexy, talented, up-standing citizens were something less, and those who confessed to being a total wreck and burden on society and such, were significantly better than they portrayed themselves to be. This appears to be typical human nature (to me at least): if you are completely impressed with yourself as a person, you likely have lower standards than someone that is trying to improve themselves.
(for the record here, I'm 188cm, fat & bald. Only one of those represents a personal fault that I can correct; I am.)0 -
standenvernet wrote: »One thing I did find to be nearly axiomatic in the whole thing was that everyone seems to overstate their position in some fashion. Those people that indicated that they were sexy, talented, up-standing citizens were something less
Wait... ~~69sexXxygurl69~~ isn't sexy? Damn
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Could be plenty sexy ... maybe not fully female ("gurl")BigBadWolf__ wrote: »standenvernet wrote: »One thing I did find to be nearly axiomatic in the whole thing was that everyone seems to overstate their position in some fashion. Those people that indicated that they were sexy, talented, up-standing citizens were something less
Wait... ~~69sexXxygurl69~~ isn't sexy? Damn
y'never know till ya check it for yourself.
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carlsonrobb wrote: »I would love to find out whatever happened to this nutjob
I'm pretty sure I could go the rest of my life not knowing lol!!!
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All of them, it usually starts with arriving and a male has yet again over estimated their height!
One of my big pet peeves since I'm pretty tall as it is. Now, I just assume that they're 2 inches shorter than they listed and I'm usually right lol! Though the last guy I dated had a height listed that was about 1-2 inches shorter than his actual height.
If women can knock 3-5 years off their age and 50lbs off their weight, then nobody can be surprised if men eventually start telling the same lies about their physical attributes. Your assumption is probably accurate as I've noticed that most women are 3 years older and about 20lbs heavier than they claim in their profiles.
Internet liars everywhere!
PS - I AM 5ft 8ins. That's undateably short and no amount of embellishment is going to change that!!!
See..I can understand in a way, if a woman says shes 5'3" and a guy lies and says he's 5'10" when hes actually 5'8"..because heck, even in sexy 4" heels, she will not even reach his height. She likely wont even notice *that* much. (Im guessing..I have no idea how women that height think, except that for some reason, they prefer to date men twice their height LoL)
I'm 5'10"...all I ask is a guy at least my height so that I dont have to look down on him and be able to wear heels without towering over him like Im his mum or something. When a guy lies and says he too is 5'10" but hes 5'8...and Im thinking oh! I can wear my heels, I wont be that much taller. And I end up being 4" taller than him when we meet...thats a problem! Actually, now I never wear heels on a first date..I always wear flats because I assume the guy is lying, and I *still* tower over most of the guys.
Age is subjective..not like if you meet someone who says they are 40, and they knock off 3 years and are actually 37 you will be like WTF? LIAR!! lol Its only if she used 10yo pics that it is a noticeable problem. Weight? That can change...not that Ive ever even seen weight listed on a profile anyway. But regardless...using old pics is a lame move.
But height? If you're done with puberty, and I'm guessing we all are...that's never going to change. Its not like I can say..its okay that he lied and is only 5'8..he will grow. LOL no. I will always have to bend down to kiss him.
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I've got friends who use online dating apps and I am simply stunned at the pictures guys put up. Granted they are in their 20s but it's like they have no idea is a horrible picture. Put on a clean shirt, have a friend take it, and maybe put down the bottle of beer and/or gun. Market yourself!!0
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All of them, it usually starts with arriving and a male has yet again over estimated their height!
One of my big pet peeves since I'm pretty tall as it is. Now, I just assume that they're 2 inches shorter than they listed and I'm usually right lol! Though the last guy I dated had a height listed that was about 1-2 inches shorter than his actual height.
I have the same pet peeve. I am literally 6 ft tall so I will be able to tell if you are stretching that height lol. One guy (6ft 2 listed)showed up and was really about 5'9 at best. Now I have no problem with shorter if they own it but really. He was also using a picture that was about 10 years old at least.0 -
Age is subjective..not like if you meet someone who says they are 40, and they knock off 3 years and are actually 37 you will be like WTF? LIAR!!
Age isn't subjective. There are 365 days in a year.
And why lie at all?
Knowingly telling a lie makes one a LIAR, yes. One can't be 37 and 40 years of age at the same time. It's one or the other.
And anyone who would lie about this to snag a date would lie about other things too. Like "No dear, I'm not talking to anyone online right now. I'm SHOE SHOPPING. Please stop bothering me and go back to bed."
Justification?
"Well, I'm not actually going to MEET with him after work or DO anything with him. No harm done. It's my business."
All liars should be avoided like the plague.
Oooh, I think you misunderstood me! You cut out the part where I said posting old pics is a lame move...for me, lame means, not a good thing...and doesn't mean I defend this behavior! I wasn't promoting lying, I was just making an observation on the lies people tell.
I have seen people who look way older or younger than their actual age, so without proof, Id be assuming. And if they used actual pictures instead of old ones, Id already be aware of what they look like...that's what I meant by age is subjective, subjective was the wrong word for me to use but I hope you get my drift what I was trying to say now?
Anyway, was not defending lying, or trying to say one lie is better than another..I was merely musing at how silly it is to lie about something that is *so* obvious...a 3 year age difference is not remotely as obvious to me as being able to look down and see the top of a guys head who is supposed to be as tall as me or taller than me lol it also make our date very awkward if I believed him and actually wear heels only to tower several inches over him and have to look down on him like hes my child...which is why, like I said, I only wear flats on first dates now..too many awkard moments like that, so I just come prepared now. Doesnt mean Im letting the lie slide..just to avoid feeling awkward for our first and last date if he lied to me.
If I had lots of issues about guys lying about their age, then Id be ranting about that instead right along with you lol but height is my bigger annoyance because its the lie I hear more often than others. Second biggest lie I get from guys is marital status. Not often a guy lies about his age to me...maybe I just didnt know them long enough to find out lol Thats a possibility.0 -
I have the same pet peeve. I am literally 6 ft tall so I will be able to tell if you are stretching that height lol. One guy (6ft 2 listed)showed up and was really about 5'9 at best. Now I have no problem with shorter if they own it but really. He was also using a picture that was about 10 years old at least.
Yup..I had a date once with a guy who said he was my height. Not only was he not my height...he was no more than 5'...seriously...his head was just below my chest..he couldnt even make a "just the right height for" jokes that Im sure youve heard too lol cause he was too short for even that. Plus, his pic must have been taken in the best lighting, on his good side, on the best day of his life...it wasnt an old pic per se...it was just... let's see...
Ever see twins, where one seemed to look incredibly hot and the other looked eh..so so? It felt like that, like he put up the pic of his incredibly hot twin brother. Cause it resembled him, yet at the same time looked nothing like him. Hard to describe, but yeah. LoL!
..and I agree...Ive have dated guys shorter than me..well, the shortest was about 5'5"... we are still friends and go out all the time, and I dont even notice our height difference because he just as an awesome and huge personality...like you said..he owns it!! The height in and of itself isnt actually the issue...a guy who lies about his height though, already hes saying he sees his size as an issue and is insecure about it, and will be the type to whine about me wearing heels and ask me not to wear them anymore..just that whole attitude makes me feel like Shrek, not attractive and feel awkward around him. With a guy like that, I notice every single inch of our height difference...even if its just one. Blah!0 -
Been on two online dates and probably not going to bother in future! One guy was down as athletic and sporty but was so large I doubt he'd be allowed on a theme park ride. I would not have minded so much if he hadn't lied and used old photos on his profile.
The second man had no spine at all. His first meeting conversation opener..."I live with a French girl and she won't do her washing up. How can I tell her to do her washing up?"
It continued with him whining about his trip to South America (where I used to live...), asking me about how to chat girls up in bars because he was too scared to approach them, and then trying to follow me home. I had to hide in a shop to get rid of him and THEN he text me 5 minutes after I said bye saying he had a nice time, I didn't respond and then the next morning "oh I guess you're not going to reply then"....some people are clearly desperate and will cling on to anything!
A few of my friends have used online dating with similar levels of luck. I think I am just going to stick to meeting people through friends.0 -
PS - I AM 5ft 8ins. That's undateably short and no amount of embellishment is going to change that!!!
No Way!! There are lots of us shorties out there. I'm only 5'3", so 5'8" is giant!0
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