Online Dating

1222325272832

Replies

  • stephaniels0416
    stephaniels0416 Posts: 38 Member
    Dragn77 wrote: »
    I had a girl recently I thought I was vibing with and I sent her my number to see if she wanted to text cause it was hard to go back and forth on the site. Just got silence after that.

    I've given up at this point!

    Some people are like that...they just want an email buddy. Or just foolling around online with no real interest in actually meeting anyone. Thats why I dont like endless emails.

    I don't really mind endless emails. I figure it means neither of us is really interested in each other, so we chat while reading through other profiles looking for someone we are interested in.

    What I hate are the endless texts. We get along well enough to have exchanged numbers, we've been talking back and forth about every day, so why will you not meet? I find it a red flag when someone won't take a few minutes to see if who they're talking to is actually a real person. If they decided through texting they weren't interested anymore, say so or quit initiating conversation. You could be an 80 year old man with no teeth and a wife in the bed next to you. I want to know who I'm talking to.
  • Markdjones83
    Markdjones83 Posts: 852 Member
    This isn't really about a date, but I met someone online a LOOONG time ago who I really connected with. I saw his picture and even talked with him on the phone (all the time). When I finally started getting antsy about meeting--like after nearly a year--he would avoid the subject. He lived in New Jersey and had mentioned a few times how he would go into NYC on weekends to shop or catch a show. I like to travel so I told him I'd meet him in NYC. He didn't sound excited it about it, but I was persistent. I asked a girlfriend to go with me. I mean, if I wasn't going to meet this guy, which it was sounding like, I could at least have a good time with my friend! Anyhow, I get to New York and I'm like, "It's now or never." It was never. He refused to meet me and when I came back home, he called and confessed that he was really just a 14 year old boy!!!!!! :o Needless to say, that "relationship" went kaput!

    Dang, what a balla! lol
  • tchell99
    tchell99 Posts: 434 Member
    I had a girl recently I thought I was vibing with and I sent her my number to see if she wanted to text cause it was hard to go back and forth on the site. Just got silence after that.

    I've given up at this point!

    This may be generational thing, but I loathe texting and find it the least informative method of getting to know someone. Part of it is that I am just not attached to my phone 24/7 - I have it off during the day at work, don't take it to the gym, etc. I realize that makes me practically a luddite in this day and age.

    My preferred methods are 1) phone (at least you can hear tone and have an actual conversation in real time) and 2) emails (you can give context to things, share funny links, etc.) Texts (other than to say quick things like "I am running late") are a distant, distant third. I have dated 2-3 people who only wanted to communicate through text, even for serious conversations. Didn't last.

  • VintageMisery514
    VintageMisery514 Posts: 533 Member
    tchell99 wrote: »
    I had a girl recently I thought I was vibing with and I sent her my number to see if she wanted to text cause it was hard to go back and forth on the site. Just got silence after that.

    I've given up at this point!

    This may be generational thing, but I loathe texting and find it the least informative method of getting to know someone. Part of it is that I am just not attached to my phone 24/7 - I have it off during the day at work, don't take it to the gym, etc. I realize that makes me practically a luddite in this day and age.

    My preferred methods are 1) phone (at least you can hear tone and have an actual conversation in real time) and 2) emails (you can give context to things, share funny links, etc.) Texts (other than to say quick things like "I am running late") are a distant, distant third. I have dated 2-3 people who only wanted to communicate through text, even for serious conversations. Didn't last.

    I prefer texting over e-mail because it feels more like a back and forth, similar to a face-to-face conversation. Phone is probably in between those, but not till I'm comfortable with the person. I have weird phone anxiety with some people. So yeah, definitely different for everybody. :)
  • tchell99
    tchell99 Posts: 434 Member
    edited March 2015
    tchell99 wrote: »
    I had a girl recently I thought I was vibing with and I sent her my number to see if she wanted to text cause it was hard to go back and forth on the site. Just got silence after that.

    I've given up at this point!

    This may be generational thing, but I loathe texting and find it the least informative method of getting to know someone. Part of it is that I am just not attached to my phone 24/7 - I have it off during the day at work, don't take it to the gym, etc. I realize that makes me practically a luddite in this day and age.

    My preferred methods are 1) phone (at least you can hear tone and have an actual conversation in real time) and 2) emails (you can give context to things, share funny links, etc.) Texts (other than to say quick things like "I am running late") are a distant, distant third. I have dated 2-3 people who only wanted to communicate through text, even for serious conversations. Didn't last.

    I prefer texting over e-mail because it feels more like a back and forth, similar to a face-to-face conversation. Phone is probably in between those, but not till I'm comfortable with the person. I have weird phone anxiety with some people. So yeah, definitely different for everybody. :)

    True, and I am fine with people preferring other modes. It just turns out that text-reliant people are usually a sign of greater incompatibility in my [admittedly limited] experience.

    Like the folks who expect you to respond almost instantly on text - I am not at anyone's beck and call, even if technology makes this physically possible (luckily my profession does not require it, though people at work have tried to convince me otherwise).

    I've had people I was casually dating freak out on me, with texts getting increasingly desperate, rude, then mean in the span of two hours because I was at the gym and left the phone in the car (on purpose...you know, so I could work out without distraction). a couple of these same people would text with friends and update their FB or Twitter status throughout dinner - their phone almost never left their hand. If this is more important than interacting with the person who bothered to meet up to spend time with you, then we are probably ill-suited.

    Curmudgeon Over and Out ;)
  • 47Jacqueline
    47Jacqueline Posts: 6,993 Member
    1Hunie wrote: »
    At this point my horror stories make excellent conversation pieces. I enjoy laughing at them now. Nothing scared me away from online dating, I'd do it again.

    I have enough humor in my life without paying for the privilege. lol
  • Jojomotivated
    Jojomotivated Posts: 141 Member
    No posts since the 2nd? Pssh. Bump!
  • Dude showed up looking nothing like pic and admitted he was married
  • stephaniels0416
    stephaniels0416 Posts: 38 Member
    I've seen a new guy a few times, but it's not going to go anywhere. He's smart, thoughtful, beautiful house, good job, cute cat, but completely boring. He has two motorcycles and loves sky diving, so I was expecting smart and fun. If he didn't have pictures, I'd swear he made it up. He's got no personality.
  • iamlynn74
    iamlynn74 Posts: 502 Member
    edited March 2015
    Oh dear lord.
    So I'm chatting with two different girls and set up a couple of dates. 1st date let's call her freckles on a saturday for crawfish live band and we're on the patio. Nice and chill...great date. Set up another date a week after with "march madness", made a bet on the colleges that were playing at a place called fuzzy's....chill but meh. And just for filler "March Madness" looked like she was preg. She may not have been but I'm just saying but screw it, drinks and a woman that digs sports cool....and "freckles" was "freckles" cool date. Anyway, turns out they were friends or at least knew each other because I get a messed up phone call with the both of them saying shyt like "oh you think your're a player", "you are a dog", "you can't treat women like this" and then some.

    Huh..WTH just happened.

    It online dating...I'm not expecting to marry off your profile info and one date. Sorry
  • stephaniels0416
    stephaniels0416 Posts: 38 Member
    newmeadow wrote: »
    I've seen a new guy a few times, but it's not going to go anywhere. He's smart, thoughtful, beautiful house, good job, cute cat, but completely boring. He has two motorcycles and loves sky diving, so I was expecting smart and fun. If he didn't have pictures, I'd swear he made it up. He's got no personality.

    Give it some more time maybe.

    I've seen him three times. I wasn't really feeling it from the first meeting, but the initial contact was decent and sometimes it takes a while for people to get comfortable. He's a good guy, so I figured I'd give him a chance. Instead of finding things in common we can talk about other than our pets, I'm finding things I don't really want to date and missing qualities I want in someone I'm dating. It's mostly little things, but there's so many of them, they're adding up to us just not being right for each other.
  • applesyoo
    applesyoo Posts: 31
    I met my current boyfriend of three years online gaming. We met on an application called TeamSpeak 3, a well known communication program for gamers, and the night we started talking we just clicked. We spoke to each other every day after that, added each other on facebook, skype and then three months later we were "in a relationship."

    So the wait begun to meet each other. One year went passed, unable to meet. We then promised no matter what, we would meet before our two year anniversary. So, 20 months in to our online, long distance relationship, he travelled to Australia to see me. He was here for 20 days, and when he left my heart shattered into millions of pieces.

    Within in the next six months, my flights were booked to travel to New Zealand to meet his family (they all hate me, just thought I'd add that in. They are possibly the worst in-laws in the world. I've never hated anyone, but they make the exception), and travel NZ with him. At this stage I was preparing myself for the worst goodbye in history, and then circumstances changed and he told me he wanted to move to Australia, leaving the same time I was and coming back with me.

    We are now three years into a relationship, living together, and I have a feeling I'm starting to faintly hear wedding bells. ;-)

    So yeah, that's my briefly described story.

    Much love and blessings to everyone. <3
  • VintageMisery514
    VintageMisery514 Posts: 533 Member
    applesyoo wrote: »
    I met my current boyfriend of three years online gaming. We met on an application called TeamSpeak 3, a well known communication program for gamers, and the night we started talking we just clicked. We spoke to each other every day after that, added each other on facebook, skype and then three months later we were "in a relationship."

    So the wait begun to meet each other. One year went passed, unable to meet. We then promised no matter what, we would meet before our two year anniversary. So, 20 months in to our online, long distance relationship, he travelled to Australia to see me. He was here for 20 days, and when he left my heart shattered into millions of pieces.

    Within in the next six months, my flights were booked to travel to New Zealand to meet his family (they all hate me, just thought I'd add that in. They are possibly the worst in-laws in the world. I've never hated anyone, but they make the exception), and travel NZ with him. At this stage I was preparing myself for the worst goodbye in history, and then circumstances changed and he told me he wanted to move to Australia, leaving the same time I was and coming back with me.

    We are now three years into a relationship, living together, and I have a feeling I'm starting to faintly hear wedding bells. ;-)

    So yeah, that's my briefly described story.

    Much love and blessings to everyone. <3

    I just had to chime in and say that, minus the in-law part, this is so incredibly sweet and made my heart smile. Love is such a beautiful thing, and I love when it can overcome distance like this. I'm so happy for you! <3
  • yopeeps025
    yopeeps025 Posts: 8,680 Member
    iamlynn74 wrote: »
    Oh dear lord.
    So I'm chatting with two different girls and set up a couple of dates. 1st date let's call her freckles on a saturday for crawfish live band and we're on the patio. Nice and chill...great date. Set up another date a week after with "march madness", made a bet on the colleges that were playing at a place called fuzzy's....chill but meh. And just for filler "March Madness" looked like she was preg. She may not have been but I'm just saying but screw it, drinks and a woman that digs sports cool....and "freckles" was "freckles" cool date. Anyway, turns out they were friends or at least knew each other because I get a messed up phone call with the both of them saying shyt like "oh you think your're a player", "you are a dog", "you can't treat women like this" and then some.

    Huh..WTH just happened.

    It online dating...I'm not expecting to marry off your profile info and one date. Sorry

    The names you gave them are funny. I wonder the nicknames they give you.

  • CoffeeNBooze
    CoffeeNBooze Posts: 966 Member
    Hmmm.... good question.

    I don't have horror stories. I used to meet guys online a lot as a teenager, and there were only maybe two times they didn't look like their photos.
    The last online date that wasn't my boyfriend was this date that was 6 hours long! We just talked a lot at the restaurant, ordered more food. Went on a walk. I think he expected me to make some kind of move on him and I was like ummm no. He seemed disappointed. I got one text from him a couple days later and never saw him again. Lesson learned; keep your dates short! That was way too much info for someone to know about me that I'll never even see again.
  • iamlynn74
    iamlynn74 Posts: 502 Member
    yopeeps025 wrote: »
    iamlynn74 wrote: »
    Oh dear lord.
    So I'm chatting with two different girls and set up a couple of dates. 1st date let's call her freckles on a saturday for crawfish live band and we're on the patio. Nice and chill...great date. Set up another date a week after with "march madness", made a bet on the colleges that were playing at a place called fuzzy's....chill but meh. And just for filler "March Madness" looked like she was preg. She may not have been but I'm just saying but screw it, drinks and a woman that digs sports cool....and "freckles" was "freckles" cool date. Anyway, turns out they were friends or at least knew each other because I get a messed up phone call with the both of them saying shyt like "oh you think your're a player", "you are a dog", "you can't treat women like this" and then some.

    Huh..WTH just happened.

    It online dating...I'm not expecting to marry off your profile info and one date. Sorry

    The names you gave them are funny. I wonder the nicknames they give you.

    They called me every name in the book. I called on freckles because she had freckles and the other March madness because we met during the sweet 16 tournament.

    My point was it's online dating, so how am I the bad guy? I didn't purposely try and date 2 friends, it was a match.com coincidence. And whenever THEY shared info it and noticed it should've been a short conversation to mutually agree on all our parts. But to call and dog somebody and because we were in the same 50 mile radios. Come on....
  • Timshel_
    Timshel_ Posts: 22,834 Member
    I have a hard enough time just talking to people online. So much body language and conversational nuances are just not there, it makes it impossible to really develop anything. It's about the same as meeting people in superficial places like bars and such though. Personally, if I ever do go through dating again, I will just live on the tennis court so I know we immediately have something important in common. Nothing hotter that a fit tennis player with a solid game.
  • Belle8312
    Belle8312 Posts: 2,151 Member
    So random question for everyone.....was talking to this guy right before the holidays, we seemed to hit it off and were planning on meeting...and then poof! Dude kind of disappears. All of a sudden he texts me yesterday asking how I have been doing and has been out of town for work (for 2 months???) and just got back.
    WTF? Personally, I think that he was dating someone and they broke up so he decided to check in on me. Thoughts?
  • yopeeps025
    yopeeps025 Posts: 8,680 Member
    Belle8312 wrote: »
    So random question for everyone.....was talking to this guy right before the holidays, we seemed to hit it off and were planning on meeting...and then poof! Dude kind of disappears. All of a sudden he texts me yesterday asking how I have been doing and has been out of town for work (for 2 months???) and just got back.
    WTF? Personally, I think that he was dating someone and they broke up so he decided to check in on me. Thoughts?

    Only you have the information to make a good call on what is going on in this situation. You claim he disappeared? In what way? He stopped communication or did you?
  • VintageMisery514
    VintageMisery514 Posts: 533 Member
    Belle8312 wrote: »
    So random question for everyone.....was talking to this guy right before the holidays, we seemed to hit it off and were planning on meeting...and then poof! Dude kind of disappears. All of a sudden he texts me yesterday asking how I have been doing and has been out of town for work (for 2 months???) and just got back.
    WTF? Personally, I think that he was dating someone and they broke up so he decided to check in on me. Thoughts?

    Yeah, that theory doesn't sound far-fetched to me. He couldn't text you at ANY point to say he was working or was going to start working soon and be unavailable?? I don't think so, that's just disrespectful and rude. Nobody is ever too busy, they just choose what they make time for...Sorry, that dude sounds not good for you. You can find better!
  • wolfsbayne
    wolfsbayne Posts: 3,116 Member
    Belle8312 wrote: »
    So random question for everyone.....was talking to this guy right before the holidays, we seemed to hit it off and were planning on meeting...and then poof! Dude kind of disappears. All of a sudden he texts me yesterday asking how I have been doing and has been out of town for work (for 2 months???) and just got back.
    WTF? Personally, I think that he was dating someone and they broke up so he decided to check in on me. Thoughts?

    sketchy for sure. If he was going out of town for work, I would think he'd let you know and that he would like to get back in touch when he got back.

  • suzeequu
    suzeequu Posts: 110 Member
    I had someone show up with a marriage contract on the first date. He felt we were both getting older and should just jump into it without much thought. along with it came a list of 25 questions that were mostly sexual in nature.. needless to say, I never went out with him again lol
  • guinevere96
    guinevere96 Posts: 1,445 Member
    My first date was an online thing, first question was "Youre really 18 right? I could go to jail for that you know"

    Charming. Didn't last long.
  • iamlynn74
    iamlynn74 Posts: 502 Member
    Belle8312 wrote: »
    So random question for everyone.....was talking to this guy right before the holidays, we seemed to hit it off and were planning on meeting...and then poof! Dude kind of disappears. All of a sudden he texts me yesterday asking how I have been doing and has been out of town for work (for 2 months???) and just got back.
    WTF? Personally, I think that he was dating someone and they broke up so he decided to check in on me. Thoughts?

    Sounds like he was boo'd up for the holidays and now back to freelance work. Or is just plain cheating.

    Question, why do people put so much stock in relationships while dating. Dating should be fun and if it happens cool. When did dating become detective work.
  • yopeeps025
    yopeeps025 Posts: 8,680 Member
    iamlynn74 wrote: »
    Belle8312 wrote: »
    So random question for everyone.....was talking to this guy right before the holidays, we seemed to hit it off and were planning on meeting...and then poof! Dude kind of disappears. All of a sudden he texts me yesterday asking how I have been doing and has been out of town for work (for 2 months???) and just got back.
    WTF? Personally, I think that he was dating someone and they broke up so he decided to check in on me. Thoughts?

    Sounds like he was boo'd up for the holidays and now back to freelance work. Or is just plain cheating.

    Question, why do people put so much stock in relationships while dating. Dating should be fun and if it happens cool. When did dating become detective work.

    Well we chatting right. I'm sure some people don't after a date. A lot of crazy people in this world. Also does a person not change the way they do things from previous mistakes. That would cause lots to do detective world to make sure this person doesn't cut off my limbs after the date.
  • yourradimradletshug
    yourradimradletshug Posts: 964 Member
    Belle8312 wrote: »
    So random question for everyone.....was talking to this guy right before the holidays, we seemed to hit it off and were planning on meeting...and then poof! Dude kind of disappears. All of a sudden he texts me yesterday asking how I have been doing and has been out of town for work (for 2 months???) and just got back.
    WTF? Personally, I think that he was dating someone and they broke up so he decided to check in on me. Thoughts?

    Had a guy do almost the exact same thing to me a while back. He is NOT worth your time! If he didn't want to be with you back around the holidays he sure as hell ain't worth your time now!

    I can't stand guys who pull that stuff. Even if I forgot to delete their number and they text me I just say "Umm I'm sorry who is this?" no point in wasting time on guys like that.
  • Belle8312
    Belle8312 Posts: 2,151 Member
    wolfsbayne wrote: »
    Belle8312 wrote: »
    So random question for everyone.....was talking to this guy right before the holidays, we seemed to hit it off and were planning on meeting...and then poof! Dude kind of disappears. All of a sudden he texts me yesterday asking how I have been doing and has been out of town for work (for 2 months???) and just got back.
    WTF? Personally, I think that he was dating someone and they broke up so he decided to check in on me. Thoughts?

    sketchy for sure. If he was going out of town for work, I would think he'd let you know and that he would like to get back in touch when he got back.

    So we talked all through the holidays while he was on vacation with his family in another state. It seemed like we really connected, talking about pretty much everything. So while he was gone, he sent me a few "I miss you, wish you were here" texts, which I would think was because he was probably a little intoxicated.
    He came back right after the New Year and called him out on it. He did admit that those texts were sent while he was drinking. I told him that I figured they were, but no big deal, I have sent some crazy texts while I was drunk and put a little smiley face at the end of it to let him know it didn't bother me.
    I then asked how everything was since he had been back and if he would like to meet up to get a drink within the next few weeks. No reply. (I am not the person to keep texting someone, if they don't answer, that's on them) So this was the first week in January.
    Then literally he texted me yesterday asking how I was. Etc, etc.
    I called him out on it and asked WTF happened to him the past two months. That's when he said he was in San Diego for work (we both live in the same town, 3 1/2 hours from San Diego) and he just got back. Um, really? You didn't have your phone for two months? Now if he had been military and said he deployed or something, totally different story. But San Diego? 2 months? No contact? Shady.
    He then asked me for a current picture of me (a totally rated G pic - he sent me the same). I sent him one and here we are almost 24 hours later and no response.
    Again. WTF????
  • Selah722
    Selah722 Posts: 86 Member
    I met my Husband on Christian Mingle! I was 22 and he was the very first guy to ask me out. ha! dated for 4 months. engaged for 6. been married for 9 months! but I was REALLY picky. I only met one other guy online before him. and I only met that guy for coffee like 2 times before i decided he wasn't anything I wanted to date. LOL its possible. So glad I did it! My Hubby Is just frickin awesome!
    If you're looking for/are ready for a spouse, not just looking for someone to sleep with, then it actually can work well to use online dating to meet someone.
  • TFaustino67
    TFaustino67 Posts: 551 Member
    So given all the stories I just skimmed through - do you folks still feel online dating is a 'thing' you would continue to do? I'm asking because my daughter mentioned it to me that was something she has done. I'm old I guess because I don't get it.
  • VintageMisery514
    VintageMisery514 Posts: 533 Member
    Belle8312 wrote: »
    wolfsbayne wrote: »
    Belle8312 wrote: »
    So random question for everyone.....was talking to this guy right before the holidays, we seemed to hit it off and were planning on meeting...and then poof! Dude kind of disappears. All of a sudden he texts me yesterday asking how I have been doing and has been out of town for work (for 2 months???) and just got back.
    WTF? Personally, I think that he was dating someone and they broke up so he decided to check in on me. Thoughts?

    sketchy for sure. If he was going out of town for work, I would think he'd let you know and that he would like to get back in touch when he got back.

    So we talked all through the holidays while he was on vacation with his family in another state. It seemed like we really connected, talking about pretty much everything. So while he was gone, he sent me a few "I miss you, wish you were here" texts, which I would think was because he was probably a little intoxicated.
    He came back right after the New Year and called him out on it. He did admit that those texts were sent while he was drinking. I told him that I figured they were, but no big deal, I have sent some crazy texts while I was drunk and put a little smiley face at the end of it to let him know it didn't bother me.
    I then asked how everything was since he had been back and if he would like to meet up to get a drink within the next few weeks. No reply. (I am not the person to keep texting someone, if they don't answer, that's on them) So this was the first week in January.
    Then literally he texted me yesterday asking how I was. Etc, etc.
    I called him out on it and asked WTF happened to him the past two months. That's when he said he was in San Diego for work (we both live in the same town, 3 1/2 hours from San Diego) and he just got back. Um, really? You didn't have your phone for two months? Now if he had been military and said he deployed or something, totally different story. But San Diego? 2 months? No contact? Shady.
    He then asked me for a current picture of me (a totally rated G pic - he sent me the same). I sent him one and here we are almost 24 hours later and no response.
    Again. WTF????

    giphy.gif