We broke up because...
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She didn't believe my orgasms were real..0
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She didn't like the bacon I made lol0
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She tied me up and force fed me bacon.. It was horrible0
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she took up archery...and made me put a grape on my head0
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He played too many games0
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she put fertilizer on the lawn..while I was sunbathing0
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He wouldn't tan.....0
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She didn't love me anymore
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She ran off with a cabana boy!0
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had back pain and was opting for a breast reduction surgery...be more selfish!0
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I needed him to be more "supportive".0
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She constantly cheated at board games0
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She calls her bra a him, says they cradle her ladies just right. It disturbed me.0
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she took me bungee jumping, but tied the cord around my neck0
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He broke up with me because I peed myself laughing at his jokes0
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Because the zombie wouldn't go to bed
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He ran off with the neighbours wife0
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she found her mothers number on my speed dial0
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so i added his father to my speed dial0
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