QUICK! Weight loss secret right here!

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  • NobodyPutsAmyInTheCorner
    NobodyPutsAmyInTheCorner Posts: 1,018 Member
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    I came across this on Google. Made me laugh hard with some of the crazy threads that spring up on here sometimes.
  • HeySwoleSister
    HeySwoleSister Posts: 1,938 Member
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    But....can't I make it go faster if I take some supplements? I want to lose a ton of weight by summer so I can look good in a swimsuit and go back to eating normally.
  • NobodyPutsAmyInTheCorner
    NobodyPutsAmyInTheCorner Posts: 1,018 Member
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    EWJLang wrote: »
    But....can't I make it go faster if I take some supplements? I want to lose a ton of weight by summer so I can look good in a swimsuit and go back to eating normally.

    You need to eat your body weight in soap which will wash away any toxins...
  • scraver2003
    scraver2003 Posts: 528 Member
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    But I NEED to lose ten pounds by tomorrow!!
  • williams969
    williams969 Posts: 2,528 Member
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    never2bstopped wrote: »
    It may be simple but it's not quick or easy........


    This won't catch on. :disappointed:

    Aha, but it is quicker. How many people (IRL and on MFP) that go the "fad" route and are STILL trying to lose after YEARS of doing 10 day detoxes, 3-day diets, etc. followed by "giving up" and "falling of the wagon" and losing essentially nothing (or even gaining). And here I am--just 6 months of "slowly" losing--and I'm done, because I learned how to eat to a proper goal.
  • giantrobot_powerlifting
    giantrobot_powerlifting Posts: 2,598 Member
    edited April 2015
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    Other than pleasure, eating for me is about harnessing and leveraging it toward my goals.
  • PeachyPlum
    PeachyPlum Posts: 1,243 Member
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    scraver2003 wrote: »
    But I NEED to lose ten pounds by tomorrow!!

    Otherwise there's no point in trying at all. Because you have a hard and fast, super secret deadline that you won't explain.
  • HeySwoleSister
    HeySwoleSister Posts: 1,938 Member
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    aimeerace wrote: »
    EWJLang wrote: »
    But....can't I make it go faster if I take some supplements? I want to lose a ton of weight by summer so I can look good in a swimsuit and go back to eating normally.

    You need to eat your body weight in soap which will wash away any toxins...

    ~takes notes~

    Will that also jump-start my metabolism?
  • bookworm_847
    bookworm_847 Posts: 1,903 Member
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    But, but, some of my friends on Facebook are selling shakes and saying to do the shakes, cleanse/detox, and eat vegetables to lose weight. Your way is free and sounds less unpleasant...surely it can't work. How can I lose weight if I don't spend money and make my life miserable?
  • phill_143
    phill_143 Posts: 64 Member
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    Mrsallen6_11 wrote: »
    5374s1xlzkno.jpg

    Also, wine ;)
  • StefanyRiley
    StefanyRiley Posts: 3 Member
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    Waaaaiiiit...by "move more," do you mean drinking salt water and senna tea? Because I heard I won't lose weight unless I hang out in the bathroom for three hours pooping and crying.
  • Mrsallen6_11
    Mrsallen6_11 Posts: 416 Member
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    phill_143 wrote: »
    Mrsallen6_11 wrote: »
    5374s1xlzkno.jpg

    Also, wine ;)

    True :smiley:
  • LAWoman72
    LAWoman72 Posts: 2,846 Member
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    The only thing wrong with the sentiment in the OP is that you didn't charge money for it.
  • cresyluna
    cresyluna Posts: 48 Member
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    I knoooow. I work at a weight loss clinic "how about to start you weight/measure all of your intake and journal it and we'll discuss a healthy deficit?"

    "NO! What can I buy??" "Why won't you give me drugs?" "what kind of shot or supplement will you sell me" "what kind of wacky regimen can I do?"
  • Serah87
    Serah87 Posts: 5,481 Member
    edited April 2015
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    It only works if you are eating "clean" foods. ;)
  • NobodyPutsAmyInTheCorner
    NobodyPutsAmyInTheCorner Posts: 1,018 Member
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    Thanks everyone. This was a much needed giggle. Had a tough staying with it day and this reminded me why I am doing what I am doing :lol:
  • NobodyPutsAmyInTheCorner
    NobodyPutsAmyInTheCorner Posts: 1,018 Member
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    Serah87 wrote: »
    It only works if you are eating "clean" foods. ;)

    Err what about Herbalife? Coz you know... Liver damage is ALL the rage...
  • FluffySandwich
    FluffySandwich Posts: 1,293 Member
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    malibu927 wrote: »
    aimeerace wrote: »
    malibu927 wrote: »
    But detoxes!

    BRING OUT THE PEEPS! Ha

    I finished my Peeps last night and woke up 1.8 pounds lighter. Obviously that was the reason and not that I was nauseous all afternoon.
    Well, that does it for me.

    Putting myself on the Peeps diet!!! With this I'm sure to lose 12 pounds by next week!

  • NobodyPutsAmyInTheCorner
    NobodyPutsAmyInTheCorner Posts: 1,018 Member
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    FluffySandwich wrote: »
    malibu927 wrote: »
    aimeerace wrote: »
    malibu927 wrote: »
    But detoxes!

    BRING OUT THE PEEPS! Ha

    I finished my Peeps last night and woke up 1.8 pounds lighter. Obviously that was the reason and not that I was nauseous all afternoon.
    Well, that does it for me.

    Putting myself on the Peeps diet!!! With this I'm sure to lose 12 pounds by next week!

    ONLY 12?? You aren't setting your sights high enough... Aim for at least two stone in a week!
  • FluffySandwich
    FluffySandwich Posts: 1,293 Member
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    aimeerace wrote: »
    FluffySandwich wrote: »
    malibu927 wrote: »
    aimeerace wrote: »
    malibu927 wrote: »
    But detoxes!

    BRING OUT THE PEEPS! Ha

    I finished my Peeps last night and woke up 1.8 pounds lighter. Obviously that was the reason and not that I was nauseous all afternoon.
    Well, that does it for me.

    Putting myself on the Peeps diet!!! With this I'm sure to lose 12 pounds by next week!

    ONLY 12?? You aren't setting your sights high enough... Aim for at least two stone in a week!
    Thanks for the motivation, you're certainly correct! I'm sure by eating one fourth of a peep and fifteen laxatives per day, I may even be able to lose 30 pounds by Monday! I can't wait to see my new slender body on those internet ads... "Doctors hate her!''

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