You aren't always going to get support
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Lrdoflamancha wrote: »True to an extent.... My SO and I are in this together... We support each other and at times call each other out on bad choices. I seriously do not believe either of us could do this alone.
Aaaaaaaw. That is so sweet!0 -
The only people really interested in your weight is your health/life insurance company. Believe it or not they want you to be healthy and well WHILE still paying the premiums and not collecting any benefits for A LONG LONG time.
A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
IDEA Fitness member
Kickboxing Certified Instructor
Been in fitness for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition
So true! My insurance company solicited me for a 16 week weight loss program complete with wireless scale and fitbit. All free!1 -
I've seen this offered many times.The only people really interested in your weight is your health/life insurance company. Believe it or not they want you to be healthy and well WHILE still paying the premiums and not collecting any benefits for A LONG LONG time.
A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
IDEA Fitness member
Kickboxing Certified Instructor
Been in fitness for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition
So true! My insurance company solicited me for a 16 week weight loss program complete with wireless scale and fitbit. All free!
A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
IDEA Fitness member
Kickboxing Certified Instructor
Been in fitness for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition
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I actually would be quite uncomfortable talking about it with most people I know, so I'm glad that they probably wouldn't be very invested in it. Although my boyfriend did say the other day, "I'm proud of you for going to the gym by yourself even when I can't come with you." It was nice to be acknowledged for that even though I'm trying to keep a lot of this on the down-low so I can go at my own pace.8
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mamapeach910 wrote: »Yup. I never get the "I need motivation, please" requests at all.
None of us are children any more. We don't need mom and dad to give us a little push to step out and do something for ourselves.
Adults take responsibility and take action. If they can't find the motivation themselves for taking that action, they're not ready to play the game.
Well if it's really a game a lot of those are played in teams...
Just because you may not have people who are interested doesn't mean you shouldn't seek out like minded people if that's your cup of tea. IMO that's a marker of an adult - to realize what they need and go out and get it
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My boyfriend is my best cheerleader. I don't need that to suceed but I still LOVE getting the pat on the back.4
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Positive feedback and acknowledgement is always good.My boyfriend is my best cheerleader. I don't need that to suceed but I still LOVE getting the pat on the back.
It's good you have a supporter, but many don't and can't understand why. Hopefully they see this thread and use it as their own push to get success for themselves.
A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
IDEA Fitness member
Kickboxing Certified Instructor
Been in fitness for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition
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herrspoons wrote: »Said it before, will say it again: No one else cares, and most people who need motivation and support from other people will not do well.
Yep. And this holds true for almost everything in life.
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Motivation has to come from within. Otherwise, it's just pressure from other people.2
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atypicalsmith wrote: »Motivation has to come from within. Otherwise, it's just pressure from other people.
So true. When I wasn't in the right mindset, well meaning "advice" from my husband was not well recieved, I took it as an insult to my weight. Now I ready to lose the weight I am more receptive to seeing it as encouragement.
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My husband is supportive in a hands off way. He congratulates me, tells me I look good, and does stuff like measure my food if I'm late getting home from work and miss supper and he's making me a plate, etc. That is the perfect level of support for me. He is counting his calories now but I've never expected that of him or expected him to exercise or change what he eats. A supportive partner is nice. A fitness twin is unnecessary.8
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Well, also, they just get tired of it. I mean how many times can a person say "Wow, that's great" when you tell them you lost another pound, and how interesting is it to hear about this week's macros compared to last week and how upping your protein has helped with appetite control?
My brother-in-law's girlfriend manages to work stats on the amazing curative powers of each of her specially prepared dishes and how they keep her so "fit" into every family gathering conversation. Oh my God she is a snore. Everybody's eyes glaze over, even those of us who ARE into nutrition and or weight loss.7 -
Well, also, they just get tired of it. I mean how many times can a person say "Wow, that's great" when you tell them you lost another pound, and how interesting is it to hear about this week's macros compared to last week and how upping your protein has helped with appetite control?
My brother-in-law's girlfriend manages to work stats on the amazing curative powers of each of her specially prepared dishes and how they keep her so "fit" into every family gathering conversation. Oh my God she is a snore. Everybody's eyes glaze over, even those of us who ARE into nutrition and or weight loss.
:laugh: :laugh:
Well said!
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atypicalsmith wrote: »Motivation has to come from within. Otherwise, it's just pressure from other people.
Exactly! So true.
Also, motivation only gets you so far. Habit and discipline get you the rest of the way.5 -
I have found this to be very true. I also have found that I have "lost" friends since I have gotten healthier, lost weight, and workout bc I no longer have enough in common with them. I dont go out and drink with them anymore or go out to eat to socialize. HOWEVER, I am closer with my Hub bc he has recently decided to lift too. I am loving that he wants to lift and get healthier himself! Makes cooking easier
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All very true - I am trying very hard to sneak it by my husband that I am trying to lose weight. I have learned the hard way that if I tell him, not only will he not support me, he will downright go into sabotage mode!
So, I am on a very secretive mission that includes rummaging through food packets, secretly weighing my food, working out recipes etc, just to get into the ballpark without being caught by the park keeper....
I know some will think I should just stand up for myself and say this is what I want to do etc.....but it damned difficult when you feeling snacky/stressed and he has brought all the stuff you like into the damned house! Discretion for me is the best course of action.....he doesn't think to present me with my favourite lemon cheesecake on my second day of 'dieting' if he doesn't know I am 'dieting'.........
PS. I have tried the direct route, in case you were wondering......so much bluddy hassle!! Caused more stress than it worth!3 -
My hubby is a saboteur
He doesn't want me to lose anymore weight, so he sneaks extra oil on my food, brings me chocolate which most times i refuse anyway. I thought he was worried about me losing TOO much weight. But i recently pushed him further, and his number 1 reason is.........
He doesn't want me to lose my boobs :huh:
They are still a decent size mind you, and I've only got 6lbs left to my goal weight, so i doubt they are going to shrink alot between now and then....5 -
christinev297 wrote: »My hubby is a saboteur He doesn't want me to lose anymore weight, so he sneaks extra oil on my food, brings me chocolate which most times i refuse anyway. I thought he was worried about me losing TOO much weight. But i recently pushed him further, and his number 1 reason is.........
He doesn't want me to lose my boobs :huh:
They are still a decent size mind you, and I've only got 6lbs left to my goal weight, so i doubt they are going to shrink alot between now and then....
Unless most of the six lbs comes from zha ta tas! :laugh:
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christinev297 wrote: »My hubby is a saboteur He doesn't want me to lose anymore weight, so he sneaks extra oil on my food, brings me chocolate which most times i refuse anyway. I thought he was worried about me losing TOO much weight. But i recently pushed him further, and his number 1 reason is.........
He doesn't want me to lose my boobs :huh:
They are still a decent size mind you, and I've only got 6lbs left to my goal weight, so i doubt they are going to shrink alot between now and then....
Wow. That's just... wow.
I mean, not the not wanting you to lose your boobs part. Lots of men think like that, even though it's not rational. But he's allowed to have an opinion. But the sneaking extra oil on your food or bringing you extra chocolate part? NOT cool. That's poor respect for your boundaries. If any guy tried that with me, I'd seriously lose my *kitten*.8 -
mamapeach910 wrote: »Yup. I never get the "I need motivation, please" requests at all.
None of us are children any more. We don't need mom and dad to give us a little push to step out and do something for ourselves.
Adults take responsibility and take action. If they can't find the motivation themselves for taking that action, they're not ready to play the game.
Well if it's really a game a lot of those are played in teams...
Just because you may not have people who are interested doesn't mean you shouldn't seek out like minded people if that's your cup of tea. IMO that's a marker of an adult - to realize what they need and go out and get it
Nice attempt to play a word game and stray from the point.
Weight loss is an individual journey. We might all be doing the same thing, but each person's issue with food is different from the next person's.
How can someone else motivate you? That's not going to see you through when a pan of brownies is in your kitchen calling your name.
I'm sorry, I think people asking other people to motivate them don't have their head in the game.
If you're seeking an external locus of control your whole life, you're not a grown up yet.
There's also a difference between support and motivation. I guess if you want support from people also losing weight with attaboys and stuff like that, you can find it here... but... looking for the wherewithal to get down to it and just do it in the first place?
That's an inside job.
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