I hate food - but I'm fat and hungry all the time

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Replies

  • PeachyPlum
    PeachyPlum Posts: 1,243 Member
    NewXila wrote: »
    Than you to everyone about the advice to see a therapist. However, I can't afford healthier food so how do I afford a therapist? I have health insurance through my work with a $12000 deductible. I already have a therapist and I see her 3 times a year on my employee assistance program for other mental health issues. Also, I definately do not want to like more foods. That's not my issue. I don't want to add foods like sauces, for example.

    I realize no one can help me.

    Also I don't see dietitians, I work with them in a clinic. So, I'm okay on that. I'm just lost because so many diet tips are all about cutting out things I already don't eat.

    That's OK. Just eat less of the foods you do like, and you'll be able to lose weight. Measure and log everything carefully to make sure you know how much you're really eating.

    You'll probably find this easier if you try to eat more of the steamed chicken and veggies and less of the candy. You can still lose weight either way, but you'll feel less hungry eating chicken and veggies than you will candy.
  • nikkinoellemary
    nikkinoellemary Posts: 119 Member
    NewXila wrote: »
    Than you to everyone about the advice to see a therapist. However, I can't afford healthier food so how do I afford a therapist? I have health insurance through my work with a $12000 deductible. I already have a therapist and I see her 3 times a year on my employee assistance program for other mental health issues. Also, I definately do not want to like more foods. That's not my issue. I don't want to add foods like sauces, for example.

    I realize no one can help me.

    Also I don't see dietitians, I work with them in a clinic. So, I'm okay on that. I'm just lost because so many diet tips are all about cutting out things I already don't eat.


    If you haven't already, check out this website. It seems they might offer info on finding support groups for EDs and an opportunity to speak to someone on a hotline/online chat. Any kind of help is better than nothing at all, especially if the only reason behind you not going is financial constraint. I'm sorry, it simply is not true that no one can help you. Someone can, if you seek it out.

    http://www.nationaleatingdisorders.org/find-help-support

    My only other advice has already been stated, just manage better portions of your safe foods in the mean time. I know there is a big kick of protein/fiber enriched versions in easy prepare foods, so maybe seek those out if you can afford them. I really wish you the best and hope you can find proper treatment soon.
  • nopotofgold
    nopotofgold Posts: 164 Member
    ok, find a new job, stop eating, and spend more time in the sun. Since you stated no one can help you, I figured you just were looking for pity or one someone to validate you.
  • 0somuchbetter0
    0somuchbetter0 Posts: 1,335 Member
    Therapy won't force you to like more foods, it will help you deal with your basic physical need for food (like it or not, you'll die without it) without it causing you a mental break. Look into options for low-income people. I don't know since I'm not in that situation, but surely there must be resources, assuming you're in the U.S.
  • SarcasmIsMyLoveLanguage
    SarcasmIsMyLoveLanguage Posts: 2,668 Member
    Ignore the insensitive comments here. Some folks are not reading between the lines.

    I don't understand your specific situation, but I certainly understand the anxiety and depression aspect of it. I also get the fact that no matter how much you explain yourself, what makes perfect sense to you is totally irrational to others. I get it. I empathize with you completely.

    I'm not a professional, but I know without a doubt that your limited therapist visits are not going to cut it. This is a mental health challenge and you need more frequent and ongoing support. If you have to rework your family budget in other areas to be able to afford more therapy, please do so.

    I wish you all the best as you work through this.

  • NewXila
    NewXila Posts: 8 Member
    nopotofgold wrote: »
    ok, find a new job, stop eating, and spend more time in the sun. Since you stated no one can help you, I figured you just were looking for pity or one someone to validate you.
    No, I was looking for maybe people who are in a similar boat. There are 7,000,000,000 people on earth and we are not as unique and special as preschool teaches us, my issue may be more unusual than some but there must be others out there with some similarities.

    What I meant by "no one can help me" is that none of the people on the forum could help with my disorder. Just like no one can help you from lashing out at a stranger for no reason. I could recommend therapy but I don't know your situation with healthcare or finances. I can't really help you with your anger issues. People like you make it harder for someone to want to ask for help from a community.

    And yes, to someone else. "boom, your fat." I gained 2 lbs this weekend for not moving enough. I didn't say that wasn't my fault. You gain weight exponentially faster than you lose it, and if you have a slow metabolism and you don't constantly stay aware you're fat before you realize it.


    To everyone else, thank you. I do bake my food at home. Frying is more work, but a lot of packaged foods like chicken strips are pre-fried (This is an example.) cutting portions is my best bet, and then distract myself from the hungry feeling.
  • nopotofgold
    nopotofgold Posts: 164 Member
    edited April 2015
    Doesn't seem like I am the only one with anger issues under your own guidelines.
    You are a picky eater that likes junk food. Here is a link to help you get the help you need for your multiple issues like the 'food disorder (since that is how you presented your picky eating)', depression, and anger management. http://www.coaccess.com/access-behavioral-care
  • keithcw_the_first
    keithcw_the_first Posts: 382 Member
    Now the flags are flying?

    @nopotofgold It sounds like it's more than picky eating. But it does also sound like there's a thread of validation-seeking in there.
    @NewXila It really, really isn't "boom you're fat". I can gain two pounds today if I drink two pounds' of water. There's a lot of stuff here to unpack; certainly some patience with internet strangers who are attempting to help you is in order.
  • SarcasmIsMyLoveLanguage
    SarcasmIsMyLoveLanguage Posts: 2,668 Member
    keithcw_the_first wrote: »
    Now the flags are flying?

    @nopotofgold It sounds like it's more than picky eating. But it does also sound like there's a thread of validation-seeking in there.
    @NewXila It really, really isn't "boom you're fat". I can gain two pounds today if I drink two pounds' of water. There's a lot of stuff here to unpack; certainly some patience with internet strangers who are attempting to help you is in order.
    +1,000
    /thread (please /thread)

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  • Graceious1
    Graceious1 Posts: 716 Member
    To stop myself from feeling hungry throughout the day I eat 3 main meals and three snacks a day. Topping it up with water black tea or coffee usually stops the hunger pangs. If you do happen to work with a therapist you might want to look at tackling your relationship with food. If you log well it will definitely help. Fuel is food and I love it. Feel free to add for support and encouragement.
  • 0somuchbetter0
    0somuchbetter0 Posts: 1,335 Member
    Quick google search yielded this:
    careforyourmind.org/what-to-do-when-you-cant-afford-therapy/#more-1447
    and this:
    health.usnews.com/health-news/blogs/on-health-and-money/2009/04/15/6-ways-to-get-affordable-mental-health-services
    and this:
    findahealthcenter.hrsa.gov/Search_HCC.aspx

    It's a start, anyway...
  • PeachyCarol
    PeachyCarol Posts: 8,029 Member
    edited April 2015
    melimomTARDIS wrote: »
    newmeadow wrote: »
    I'm fascinated by the OP. I've never heard of anyone who really hates food, and describes that predicament in such vivid detail.

    But respectfully I'll add, I don't understand how an individual with this aversion toward food could be 50+ lbs. overweight.

    If her Safe foods are calorie dense, it's easy to over do it on the calories while trying to get full.

    Yup. And she already said what some of those safe foods are.

    My daughter's foods are pretty calorie dense, but her hunger self-regulates her intake. I can easily imagine someone with more complex issues having trouble with hunger signals and overeating calorically dense food.

    OP, MelimomTARDIS gave you some resources. You do need help and can get it. Please do.

    I'll just add to the voices urging you to stop categorizing food as "bad" or "good". It's just food. You've simply been eating too much of the food you can tolerate. Counting calories will help you eat less of it while you're on the road to getting some help.

  • girlviernes
    girlviernes Posts: 2,402 Member
    edited April 2015
    Working with a good therapist will open up a lot of doors to you that feel closed right now. I really urge you to find someone good. Even if you have a limited income, you may be able to get some traction with a good evaluation with a CBT therapist and then jointly coming up with a plan (just as one possibility, doing self-help and checking in with the therapist regularly to facilitate the process). You might also benefit from doing some reading about cognitive behavioral therapy. http://www.amazon.com/Overcoming-Specific-Phobia-Client-Practices/dp/1572241152/ref=sr_1_7?ie=UTF8&qid=1428958208&sr=8-7&keywords=overcoming+phobia

    Regarding healthy eating - the number one factor is eating the right amount for you. So, if you weigh and log the things you eat now, you can gradually bring the amounts down to get to an appropriate amount for you. The factors that help most with hunger are fat, protein, and fiber. So look at what you are willing to eat and work on getting some fat, protein, and fiber into each meal.

    Once you have the amount down and macros down, then if you want you can work on developing more variety, but don't worry about that now.
  • jennifershoo
    jennifershoo Posts: 3,198 Member
    Liftng4Lis wrote: »
    Professional help is required, not the internet.

    This
  • fa110n
    fa110n Posts: 10 Member
    I have never struggled with this so I have a hard time understanding. I haven't read through all of the previous posts and advice from others. However, why don't you try logging what you eat on a daily basis to see where you're at with calories then increase your exercise to accomodate that. Once you see where all the calories are coming from may make it easier to make changes in your diet.
  • hhnkhl
    hhnkhl Posts: 231 Member
    I have no clue.
    People who hate food around me are underweight. Yet, you are overweight...
    You eat way too much for someone who hates food.
  • samgamgee
    samgamgee Posts: 398 Member
    One of my old friends had this. She could only eat chicken, sausages, chips, chocolate and cheese and onion rolls (like sausage rolls but with cheese goo instead of sausage, not cheese and onion in a bread roll). Refused to get help, used to cry when we tried to talk her into eating a vegetable. At least you can eat veg! You can defo lose weight while you're in the process of dealing with your food issues - load up on chicken and veg instead of sweets, and weigh stuff. If your family don't like eating that all the time, it's time to start cooking separately. You asked for advice on not being hungry? I'm always hungrier after a pizza portion than after the equivalent calorie portion of meat and veg. If you're eating at a deficit, sorted, you'll lose weight. I hope you get the help you need!
  • 0somuchbetter0
    0somuchbetter0 Posts: 1,335 Member
    hhnkhl wrote: »
    I have no clue.
    People who hate food around me are underweight. Yet, you are overweight...
    You eat way too much for someone who hates food.

    That's why it's called a *disorder*
  • juliev1121
    juliev1121 Posts: 19 Member
    edited April 2015
    You mentioned sitting at a desk all day. I do too and it makes it hard. Yes of course suggestion, find time for exercise before or after, it really sucks but I force it. But, also, try to do whatever you can at your desk. This can be as simple as lifting and holding your legs, butt squeezes, circles with your feet legs down or up, clenching the abs. Its a start! You can make a routine.. do 10 of these 20 of those and 30 seconds of this every time the clock hits the hour, or every time the phone rings.

    Search them online. If you start feeling up to it add in some away from your desk too. I do leg lifts and squats while my lunch microwaves. Getting moving a bit every hour will help the depression too. If your up for it, a small walk or up and down the stairs a couple times a day. And, if your boss has something to say about those walks, make a meeting where you explain it helps you focus more and you feel your productivity can increase from it.

    http://www.marksdailyapple.com/11-surprisingly-effective-exercises-you-can-do-at-your-work-desk/#axzz3XQHDV5yx

    Good luck, stay positive. Believe you cant do it, and you wont. Believe you can and you will.

  • lemon629
    lemon629 Posts: 501 Member
    I used to be this way about food. Most food grossed me out. I hated eating (anything chewy like meat was the worst! Also soft foods like bananas and cereal.) and even worse, seeing other people eat or people seeing me eat. I had a very limited list of acceptable foods. I was quite under-weight, though, and forced myself to eat because I knew I needed food.

    I agree with the others who suggest seeing a therapist. There are therapists who can assist you with your aversion to food and help you to expand your list of acceptable foods. (It might actually be called aversion therapy.) However, there is no need to change what you eat on order to lose weight, just eat less of it.
  • tomatoey
    tomatoey Posts: 5,446 Member
    edited April 2015
    I think it'd be better if you got some help because this distresses you, but there's nothing necessarily wrong with eating the same foods all the time, as long as you're getting your basic micro and macronutrients. Getting them from a variety of foods would be ideal, but you know, a lot of people live on routine and simple meals. I feel like a lot of artists do that; these two people I can remember:
    - Immanuel Kant, according to a philosophy prof of mine, ate chicken and broccoli every day
    - Marilyn Monroe had a funny diet (I won't repeat it because it might gross you out)

    Anyway - it's ok if you want to eat burgers and chicken strips. and chicken and the veg you like. A multivitamin might help fill some gaps.

    The thing with not having a lot of money is it often can mean more food prep. But a couple of thoughts:
    - Maybe your family could cook their own foods? Would that be so crazy?
    - I also wonder: would it be helpful to prepare a bunch of ingredient X at once, and then a bunch of ingredient Y, in advance? That way, when it's time to cook, you'd just be assembling ingredients. I keep chopped onion ready in tupperware, and then just throw it in the pan when I'm making stuff.
    - Does using tools reduce the grossness? There are some dishes I don't love preparing that involve using your hands, so I use a spoon sometimes anyway.

    The things you've mentioned - is that the full list? Maybe if you tell us every single food you like, people could help you combine macronutrients in ways that might be more filling.

    Or you can check foods here and choose substitutions that work for you:

    This tool lets you search by macronutrient ratio: http://nutritiondata.self.com/tools/caloric-ratio-search

    This one lets you search by "healthy" + "filling" (various degrees)
    http://nutritiondata.self.com/tools/nutritional-target-map-search
  • keysgotkurves
    keysgotkurves Posts: 1 Member
    I feel like i have similar tendencies as you but my food index is higher than 50 foods. i can bare veggies and healthy food but i still hate food cause it made me fat and im so sensitive to gain weight, food its a waste of time to me. i cant undereat or overeat its annoying! food is annoying! my body type is sooo difficult to read.. idkkk... but i think i did realize to overcome this i need cog therapy. i think u should look into that to change your relationship with food and hopefully get to the point to feel like most foods can be safe if u find a good healthy balance. but what do i know i only lost 55lbs in 8 months. i wish u the best of luck girly you will find peace with this issue one day dont give up cause if u give up you give up on yourself </3
  • csplatt
    csplatt Posts: 1,205 Member
    edited July 2021
    I understand you as my son had to attend feeding therapy / occupational therapy for sensory processing issues, oral aversion, inability to even touch food with his hands without dry heaving. Have you ever reached out to anyone in that field?

    My idea for you is a blender called the Vitamix. It’s super powerful so you won’t get lumps. My son cannot eat fruit (he’s 12 now), so many days we put frozen strawberries, frozen blueberries, a banana, some yogurt, and some orange juice (plus ice/water) into the blender for him. Smoothie meal!

    For people who roll their eyes, you could ask them to google the difference between picky eating and problem feeding. Hugs!
  • csplatt
    csplatt Posts: 1,205 Member
    edited July 2021
    Also, do some research on a lady called Kay Toomey and her “Steps to Eating.” There’s a very structured way to desensitize yourself to some of these things but it requires very specific steps, starting with being able to be at the table with a nonpreferred item, being willing to have it on your plate but not eat it, touching it, holding it in your hand, smelling it… eventually taking a bite then spitting it out, etc. It’s an incredible amount of work but we started it with my son when he was 2 and still walk through the steps with new / scary foods that will make him sick if we actually ask him to eat it. Those steps are the reason why he eats anything at all now that he’s older! Years of work! The professionals told us it can take a hundred exposures before eating it is actually a reality so we are patient.

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