Master Cleanser
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ginny92802 wrote: »We had a health screening at work today and the nurse actually told me that I should try a "detox" to "jump start" my weight loss. Since I was at work and my boss was standing right outside the door I restrained myself from calling her an idiot, but it made me mad. I've been losing weight in a safe, sustainable way for the past two months and if I didn't know what I do from reading the forum here, I might have fell for it. No wonder people come here so confused.
"Well, I can see why you never became a doctor."0 -
techgal128 wrote: »ginny92802 wrote: »We had a health screening at work today and the nurse actually told me that I should try a "detox" to "jump start" my weight loss. Since I was at work and my boss was standing right outside the door I restrained myself from calling her an idiot, but it made me mad. I've been losing weight in a safe, sustainable way for the past two months and if I didn't know what I do from reading the forum here, I might have fell for it. No wonder people come here so confused.
"Well, I can see why you never became a doctor."
That's perfect. I'm pretty good with comebacks but I didn't want to cause a scene at work!0 -
Hahaha! Every day there is a post about the master cleanse. It must be spring.0
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I picture this dude with a plunger trying to stick it up my ****.0 -
Spring cleaning, right?jennifershoo wrote: »Hahaha! Every day there is a post about the master cleanse. It must be spring.
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The other thing that's showing up a lot recently is the "HCG plan".jennifershoo wrote:Every day there is a post about the master cleanse. It must be spring.
To me, HCG means human chorionic gonadotropin... which is not something I'd like to eat!
It's a hormone produced by the placenta (and some cancerous tumors).
Some guy in the 1950s claimed that HCG (with an ultra-low-calorie diet) made people lose fat & retain muscle.
He was thoroughly debunked, over & over... which of course has no effect on the seekers of woo.
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Are you sure it was actually an RN/LPN?ginny wrote:We had a health screening at work today and the nurse actually told me that I should try
a "detox" to "jump start" my weight loss.
If so, I'd definitely say something to her supervisor, and maybe even contact the state licensing board.
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My mother is an RN, and she believes in all this crash diet stuff, and that every woman should aspire to a size 0. They do no dietary training.0
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My mother is an RN, and she believes in all this crash diet stuff, and that every woman should aspire to a size 0. They do no dietary training.
Wow. Considering the rate at which obesity (and all the associated health impacts) is rising, it would be nice if health care workers had a little knowledge of the basics. Like livers/kidneys do all the detox necessary.0 -
Anyone else tried the Lysol Cleanse? You spray a bit into every orifice three times a day for a whole lunar cycle. It's supposed to clean stuff.
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I did it for five days. My breath smelt of cat piss. I had no energy for my gym classes, and the toilet was my best friend.
I lost weight, but it was gained right back. It's all water weight, and it achieves nothing in the long run.0 -
My mother is an RN, and she believes in all this crash diet stuff, and that every woman should aspire to a size 0. They do no dietary training.
Wow. Considering the rate at which obesity (and all the associated health impacts) is rising, it would be nice if health care workers had a little knowledge of the basics. Like livers/kidneys do all the detox necessary.
Is it 'dump on nurses' day? I missed the memo.
Sure a few nurses do stupid cleanses but I'm pretty sure they aren't worse educated about nutrition then the general public. They aren't there to deal with the rising rate of obesity, that's a personal responsibility.0 -
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Spring cleaning, right?jennifershoo wrote: »Hahaha! Every day there is a post about the master cleanse. It must be spring.
The local "woo, woo" store had a sign out front a couple of days ago: "Time for Spring Cleaning. Come in for cleanses and Ion foot detox" Not sure what an ion foot detox is but I'll pass anyway.
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why are these things always called "master cleanses" is there a junior cleanse too??
OP - unless your liver and kidneys have stopped working this is unnecessary ...0 -
surfteam1689 wrote: »Hi Diliad30 - I have tried it several times. It works great. You have to really follow the recipe and protocol exactly as stated. I cleanse all the time, but when I do the Master Cleanse, the really, really bad stuff that you never thought you had in you ALL comes out! When you are done with it, you simply have to eat as best as you can to keep all that *stuff* from getting back into your system. Make sure you leave the bathroom fan on a long time! :-)
LOL no …
so if you eat "good" stuff then you never peep or poop because no bad stuff is in you?????0 -
surfteam1689 wrote: »Hi Diliad30 - I have tried it several times. It works great. You have to really follow the recipe and protocol exactly as stated. I cleanse all the time, but when I do the Master Cleanse, the really, really bad stuff that you never thought you had in you ALL comes out! When you are done with it, you simply have to eat as best as you can to keep all that *stuff* from getting back into your system. Make sure you leave the bathroom fan on a long time! :-)
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If you feel a need to cleanse, take a shower.0
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feisty_bucket wrote: »Anyone else tried the Lysol Cleanse? You spray a bit into every orifice three times a day for a whole lunar cycle. It's supposed to clean stuff.
Ladies were once advised to cleanse their nether regions with Lysol. No joke.
http://www.smithsonianmag.com/smart-news/lysols-vintage-ads-subtly-pushed-women-to-use-its-disinfectant-as-birth-control-218734/?no-ist
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I did the "picosalax" cleanse right before a surgery once. My god that was brutal. I cannot even imagine doing that to yourself willingly.
You are not meant to have pure liquid come out your *kitten*. If you were, it wouldn't be so much bigger than your urethra. We are designed to poop. The end.0 -
feisty_bucket wrote: »Anyone else tried the Lysol Cleanse? You spray a bit into every orifice three times a day for a whole lunar cycle. It's supposed to clean stuff.
Ladies were once advised to cleanse their nether regions with Lysol. No joke.
http://www.smithsonianmag.com/smart-news/lysols-vintage-ads-subtly-pushed-women-to-use-its-disinfectant-as-birth-control-218734/?no-ist
Suweet Jaysus!
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I had a good think on a similar thread about what makes me feel really "clean" and it all has to do with water. Hydrating well before exercise, working up a good sweat, rehydrating afterwards and having a long hot shower leaves me feeling clean and refreshed. That's the only cleanse I would consider and I do believe it would be much cheaper.0
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feisty_bucket wrote: »Anyone else tried the Lysol Cleanse? You spray a bit into every orifice three times a day for a whole lunar cycle. It's supposed to clean stuff.
Ladies were once advised to cleanse their nether regions with Lysol. No joke.
http://www.smithsonianmag.com/smart-news/lysols-vintage-ads-subtly-pushed-women-to-use-its-disinfectant-as-birth-control-218734/?no-ist
What the what?!?!?! OMG!!! I can't even ...0 -
Probable side effect:
After the cleanse:
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I thought the master cleanse was going to be replaced by the Peeps Cleanse?0
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I love these master cleanse posts because I actually lasted 7 days a few years back. Until I began to hallucinate food. no lie. freaking hallucinations. Then in the next two days I gained every pound back I had lost.0
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feisty_bucket wrote: »Anyone else tried the Lysol Cleanse? You spray a bit into every orifice three times a day for a whole lunar cycle. It's supposed to clean stuff.
Ladies were once advised to cleanse their nether regions with Lysol. No joke.
http://www.smithsonianmag.com/smart-news/lysols-vintage-ads-subtly-pushed-women-to-use-its-disinfectant-as-birth-control-218734/?no-ist
Holy craaaaaap!0 -
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So, all joking aside, I have a long history with my gastro doc and he has said the best thing you can do for your intestinal tract is to eat a good amount of fiber, stay hydrated, and to eat yogurt on a semi-regular basis. Yogurt has good bacteria in it that will get in there and munch on all the "bad stuff" (as someone put it on here). Your body has it's own cleaning and filtering system.
I look at it this way: If you chow down on antacids, like tums, everyday whether you need them or not, your body will stop its natural acid blocking. The point, if you take over doing tasks your body already knows how to do, it's going to stop doing it. Also, on a special note, those cleanse have a lot of acid in them which can not only kill the good bacteria in your intestinal tract in the form of fiery diarrhea , but an "overdose" of acidic food like lemons can also screw with your bilirubin counts, which would be bad for your liver.
NOT AN EXPERT, this is just things that I have been told by a doctor and watched happen to my step mother. I would research first before you do something like that.
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