Master Cleanser

Options
135

Replies

  • cassandralepandaa
    cassandralepandaa Posts: 66 Member
    Options
    I did it for five days. My breath smelt of cat piss. I had no energy for my gym classes, and the toilet was my best friend.

    I lost weight, but it was gained right back. It's all water weight, and it achieves nothing in the long run.
  • EvgeniZyntx
    EvgeniZyntx Posts: 24,208 Member
    Options
    ahoy_m8 wrote: »
    bluworld wrote: »
    My mother is an RN, and she believes in all this crash diet stuff, and that every woman should aspire to a size 0. They do no dietary training.

    Wow. Considering the rate at which obesity (and all the associated health impacts) is rising, it would be nice if health care workers had a little knowledge of the basics. Like livers/kidneys do all the detox necessary.

    Is it 'dump on nurses' day? I missed the memo.

    Sure a few nurses do stupid cleanses but I'm pretty sure they aren't worse educated about nutrition then the general public. They aren't there to deal with the rising rate of obesity, that's a personal responsibility.
  • RoxieDawn
    RoxieDawn Posts: 15,488 Member
    Options
    6lcpose5v9tv.gif

  • earlnabby
    earlnabby Posts: 8,171 Member
    Options
    PearlAng wrote: »
    jennifershoo wrote: »
    Hahaha! Every day there is a post about the master cleanse. It must be spring.
    Spring cleaning, right? ;)

    The local "woo, woo" store had a sign out front a couple of days ago: "Time for Spring Cleaning. Come in for cleanses and Ion foot detox" Not sure what an ion foot detox is but I'll pass anyway.

  • ndj1979
    ndj1979 Posts: 29,139 Member
    Options
    why are these things always called "master cleanses" is there a junior cleanse too??

    OP - unless your liver and kidneys have stopped working this is unnecessary ...
  • ndj1979
    ndj1979 Posts: 29,139 Member
    Options
    surfteam1689 wrote: »
    Hi Diliad30 - I have tried it several times. It works great. You have to really follow the recipe and protocol exactly as stated. I cleanse all the time, but when I do the Master Cleanse, the really, really bad stuff that you never thought you had in you ALL comes out! When you are done with it, you simply have to eat as best as you can to keep all that *stuff* from getting back into your system. Make sure you leave the bathroom fan on a long time! :-)

    LOL no …

    so if you eat "good" stuff then you never peep or poop because no bad stuff is in you?????
  • rushfive
    rushfive Posts: 603 Member
    Options
    gia07 wrote: »
    6lcpose5v9tv.gif

    CHUCKLES !!!!! good one..hehe
    Aren't these "cleanses" the same as taking a laxative?
  • trinatrina1984
    trinatrina1984 Posts: 1,018 Member
    edited April 2015
    Options
    surfteam1689 wrote: »
    Hi Diliad30 - I have tried it several times. It works great. You have to really follow the recipe and protocol exactly as stated. I cleanse all the time, but when I do the Master Cleanse, the really, really bad stuff that you never thought you had in you ALL comes out! When you are done with it, you simply have to eat as best as you can to keep all that *stuff* from getting back into your system. Make sure you leave the bathroom fan on a long time! :-)

    200.gif
  • snickerscharlie
    snickerscharlie Posts: 8,578 Member
    Options
    If you feel a need to cleanse, take a shower.
  • wizzybeth
    wizzybeth Posts: 3,573 Member
    Options
    feisty_bucket wrote: »
    Anyone else tried the Lysol Cleanse? You spray a bit into every orifice three times a day for a whole lunar cycle. It's supposed to clean stuff.

    Ladies were once advised to cleanse their nether regions with Lysol. No joke.

    http://www.smithsonianmag.com/smart-news/lysols-vintage-ads-subtly-pushed-women-to-use-its-disinfectant-as-birth-control-218734/?no-ist

    enhanced-buzz-21963-1378811765-1.jpg

  • MireyGal76
    MireyGal76 Posts: 7,334 Member
    Options
    I did the "picosalax" cleanse right before a surgery once. My god that was brutal. I cannot even imagine doing that to yourself willingly.

    You are not meant to have pure liquid come out your *kitten*. If you were, it wouldn't be so much bigger than your urethra. We are designed to poop. The end.
  • snickerscharlie
    snickerscharlie Posts: 8,578 Member
    Options
    wizzybeth wrote: »
    feisty_bucket wrote: »
    Anyone else tried the Lysol Cleanse? You spray a bit into every orifice three times a day for a whole lunar cycle. It's supposed to clean stuff.

    Ladies were once advised to cleanse their nether regions with Lysol. No joke.

    http://www.smithsonianmag.com/smart-news/lysols-vintage-ads-subtly-pushed-women-to-use-its-disinfectant-as-birth-control-218734/?no-ist

    enhanced-buzz-21963-1378811765-1.jpg

    Suweet Jaysus!

  • jgnatca
    jgnatca Posts: 14,464 Member
    Options
    I had a good think on a similar thread about what makes me feel really "clean" and it all has to do with water. Hydrating well before exercise, working up a good sweat, rehydrating afterwards and having a long hot shower leaves me feeling clean and refreshed. That's the only cleanse I would consider and I do believe it would be much cheaper.
  • laura3977
    laura3977 Posts: 191 Member
    Options
    wizzybeth wrote: »
    feisty_bucket wrote: »
    Anyone else tried the Lysol Cleanse? You spray a bit into every orifice three times a day for a whole lunar cycle. It's supposed to clean stuff.

    Ladies were once advised to cleanse their nether regions with Lysol. No joke.

    http://www.smithsonianmag.com/smart-news/lysols-vintage-ads-subtly-pushed-women-to-use-its-disinfectant-as-birth-control-218734/?no-ist

    enhanced-buzz-21963-1378811765-1.jpg

    What the what?!?!?! OMG!!! I can't even ...
  • xesixb
    xesixb Posts: 165 Member
    Options
    lookamazing.jpg
    anigif_enhanced-buzz-18543-1359048400-5_preview.gif
    Probable side effect:
    anigif_enhanced-buzz-31777-1359054566-10.gif
    After the cleanse:
    anigif_enhanced-buzz-5502-1365534168-13.gif
  • joseccastaneda
    joseccastaneda Posts: 267 Member
    Options
    I thought the master cleanse was going to be replaced by the Peeps Cleanse?
  • farfromthetree
    farfromthetree Posts: 982 Member
    Options
    I love these master cleanse posts because I actually lasted 7 days a few years back. Until I began to hallucinate food. no lie. freaking hallucinations. Then in the next two days I gained every pound back I had lost.
  • jennifershoo
    jennifershoo Posts: 3,198 Member
    Options
    wizzybeth wrote: »
    feisty_bucket wrote: »
    Anyone else tried the Lysol Cleanse? You spray a bit into every orifice three times a day for a whole lunar cycle. It's supposed to clean stuff.

    Ladies were once advised to cleanse their nether regions with Lysol. No joke.

    http://www.smithsonianmag.com/smart-news/lysols-vintage-ads-subtly-pushed-women-to-use-its-disinfectant-as-birth-control-218734/?no-ist

    enhanced-buzz-21963-1378811765-1.jpg

    Holy craaaaaap!
  • jennifershoo
    jennifershoo Posts: 3,198 Member
    Options
    xesixb wrote: »
    lookamazing.jpg
    anigif_enhanced-buzz-18543-1359048400-5_preview.gif
    Probable side effect:
    anigif_enhanced-buzz-31777-1359054566-10.gif
    After the cleanse:
    anigif_enhanced-buzz-5502-1365534168-13.gif

    Ahah! Love this!
  • Jackie9950
    Jackie9950 Posts: 374 Member
    Options
    So, all joking aside, I have a long history with my gastro doc and he has said the best thing you can do for your intestinal tract is to eat a good amount of fiber, stay hydrated, and to eat yogurt on a semi-regular basis. Yogurt has good bacteria in it that will get in there and munch on all the "bad stuff" (as someone put it on here). Your body has it's own cleaning and filtering system.
    I look at it this way: If you chow down on antacids, like tums, everyday whether you need them or not, your body will stop its natural acid blocking. The point, if you take over doing tasks your body already knows how to do, it's going to stop doing it. Also, on a special note, those cleanse have a lot of acid in them which can not only kill the good bacteria in your intestinal tract in the form of fiery diarrhea , but an "overdose" of acidic food like lemons can also screw with your bilirubin counts, which would be bad for your liver.

    NOT AN EXPERT, this is just things that I have been told by a doctor and watched happen to my step mother. I would research first before you do something like that. :smile:

Categories