All the Lies

mandarkio · October 2015

i've been telling myself for years that my weight is empowering and that beauty comes in all sizes (and i totally believe that it does). i even had a 'fatshion' blog. in reality i am super unhappy with my body but was too lazy to work for what i want. i've only been at this for five weeks but already i'm feeling and seeing the benefits. i can almost believe that someday i'll look in the mirror and be genuinely happy with my reflection.

amberlyda1 · October 2015

I made the mistake of living in my yoga pants. Those suckers can stretch! I didnt step on a scale for a long time. I used depression as my excuse. Funny after some time, I started taking care of myself and I started to feel better.

CoffeeNCardio · October 2015

These are all amazing you guys and SO motivating! I hope someone comes along and reads this and says "Oh, I didn't even realize but I do that too, now I know what to work on in my thinking!"

Thanks so much for your input! Keep 'em Coming!!!

madhatter2013 · October 2015

I resisted losing weight because because my husband kept telling me that he wanted a thicker woman. He married me when I was fat and didn't want me to lose it. I told him I loved being his trophy wife but I wanted to be a more active, more fit trophy wife.

deescrafty · October 2015

My family was my excuse. I would blame my size and weight on genetics, instead
of the fact that the diet my family ate was the same foods and proportions that had been eaten when my great grandparents had been farmers. We lived in a multi generational household where family heavy, carb laden foods were served three times a day with desserts at every meal and plenty of sweet snacks all day long. It is no wonder that Everyone for the last 4 generations developed diabetes 2. And I fell into the trap, and really, I knew better. Now I have to fight my way through 120 LBs of fat to find myself. The only blessing finding out in July that I had an A1c that showed I had developed diabetes was that this time I need to take changing my lifestyle seriously or risk horrible complications and early death. My blood sugars are now in normal range, and I'm keeping them there!

tltmom · October 2015

I appreciate everyone's honesty.
My lie was that I could never fight the craving to overeat sweets. That it was more powerful than I am. Turns out that was wrong.

Artemiris · October 2015

That it would be impossible for me to lose weight while I take my medications.

vegan4lyfe2012 · October 2015

You really got me thinking…reading your original post and everyone’s responses. I am sure I’ve had more excuses than I could count… Family genetics… 3 babies in 5 years… beauty comes in all sizes… boyfriend doesn’t care about my size… I could go on and on.

I ended up being on my own with 3 children for a dozen years. Sadness set in with the longing that my children’s father and I could one day be back together again. We had met when we were 19 and had our first child together when I was 21 and he was 22. It broke my heart that we couldn’t be together…understanding now that it was simply immaturity on both our parts.

One day I was in the back bedroom and the phone in the kitchen rang. I started running down the hallway and tripped and fell…HARD. It hurt physically, but then it hurt emotionally. That was the day I realized that I had become what I used to make fun of (back in high school). How can I blame genetics for being 210# when I was a mere 115# back in high school? How could I allow myself to be so unhealthy when I had 3 children to care for?

That happened about 5 years ago. I determined that I was going to be fit and healthy. It took a long time, but I lost 57 pounds. I felt great and was confident in my skin.

Then, about 2 years ago, depression set in. My son was graduating from high school. I was now the parent of an adult. My middle daughter would be graduating in one more year and then I’d be almost-empty nesting with just my youngest daughter. The depression was so bad. Every sadness was filled with food. I would binge until I felt like I was going to vomit. I gained every bit of the weight back, less 5#.

So there I was…up to 205# again with no one (and nothing) to blame. I started seeing a therapist weekly. She really opened my eyes to the fact that I treated myself as only “mom” instead of my own person. I decided I needed to start doing things for myself, too. It had been 12 years since their father and I had been together, but I opened up to him and told him I still loved him. Warm fuzzies – he felt the same way!

Now, I don’t want you to think I have only lost weight because of him, because that wouldn’t be right. I have been learning to love myself…love that I am more than just a mom. That I can open up and share with their father and he shares with me. We’ve been back together for just over 6 months…and I’m down 45 pounds. I’m feeling good about ME.

So…no more excuses. We need to learn to love OURSELVES.

maroonmango211 · October 2015

That having kids meant I could never have the body I wanted. That it was just my body type to be heavier (big boned, wide shoulders/hips etc). That my asthma, bad knees and anxiety/depression were too much to get in the way. It goes on...

Mostly it was the all or nothing thinking, this was the biggest hurdle. That I would have to give up almost everything, my favorite foods, family time, wine, coffee, my sense of style, my ambition, interests and hobbies to focus on eating healthy and exercising. That I would have to eat steamed veggies and grilled chicken breast for months on end while only sipping water and unsweetened tea. That I would have to dedicate any "extra" waking moment to burning calories. That anyone who committed to that kind of life was a crazy person and I didn't want to put myself or my family through that.

Funny thing is now I love spending a good chunk of time on fitness and healthy eating. Did I give up some stuff? Well yes, but nothing I'd trade for being much fitter, healthier and happier with how I look and feel. Looking back I must have said dozens of times " I'll never be one of those people that counts calories every day and can't wait to work out and eat veggies." Oops

c50blvdbabe · October 2015

Definitely the genetics. I gain and keep weight around my middle and am built like my grandmothers.
But more importantly, I tell myself I work out and run so I can eat whatever I want. Such a BIG BIG BIG LIE!!!!!! I've learned that exercise is at most 15% of the equation for me at least.

rankinsect · October 2015

That it didn't really make a difference whether I was obese or not.

kgb6days · October 2015

That everyone get fat as they get older. I'll be 59 next month (that equates to 60 next year) and I live in the south where we fry everything, eat BBQ, etc. I realized that if I didn't get fit I'd die at 59 of heart disease just like my mother - or 61 like my brother. What a wake up that was. Getting fit was the goal - weight loss was the cherry on top

Adc7225 · October 2015

I always told myself that I was not athletic - not sure if I am now but I do feel that I am fit. I no longer think about what I can't do with my body within reason because I know that whatever I try to do, I will be giving it my best efforts.

I worked with several trainers over the years and always said I did not want to do any exercises that required I get on the floor (don't ask) now I love being able to get on the floor because I can easily get up off the floor!

patty_36_2 · October 2015

tltmom wrote: »

I appreciate everyone's honesty.
My lie was that I could never fight the craving to overeat sweets. That it was more powerful than I am. Turns out that was wrong.

chocolate was my addiction... Just a small bar wont make a difference i kept telling myself.... Had to go cold turkey to make the jump, but a year later 80lb lighter (with a couple of lapses). I did it.

vixtris · October 2015

Plateaus are a lie. If you plateau, then its because you are maintaining, you are not burning more calories than you take in, which would mean you either need to eat less, or move more. This is why logging accurately with measuring scales and cups is an important tool for weight loss!

eskimohugger · October 2015

I tried bulking up muscle and to do so, I needed more energy so that equated to more food in my system. So I gained around 7 pounds of muscle, but I was only weight training and not doing any cardio or eating in moderation, so I gained around 10 pounds of fat, too! I kept telling myself I would cut my calories and work on cardio and I would purposefully avoid the scale. Now I portion control and practice flexible dieting, a good balance between cardio and weights, and now Im doing great! Lost 13 pounds so far

CoffeeNCardio · October 2015

Wow, I am so amazed by some of these responses! It really feels like I wrote them! I have always been REALLY sensitive to criticism, because I am so hard on myself and I mean no one likes to hear the bad about themselves, but lately I have found it really cathartic and therapeutic to say out loud (or type in public?) "I have been lying to myself about X, and now that I am aware I can stop doing that and start fixing it!" So thank you guys so much for your honesty and I hope you feel great about shedding these denials too!!!

allaboutthefood · October 2015

I was with my sister and my sister in law the other day and they commented on how good I am looking and starting talking about how they really want to start walking, but they don't like walking alone, they don't like walking in the cold, they are to tired to walk, they don't know when is a good time to start walking, they don't know how long to walk for. Excuse excuse excuse I use to be the same way. I looked at them and said hey if your 300 lbs sister can get off her butt and walk and drop 60 lbs in 8 months than you can also do it. NO MORE EXCUSES!

jlturner386 · October 2015

Kullerva wrote: »

Honestly, I resisted losing weight for a long time. I knew I needed to lose (only about 30 lbs or so) in college, but the men (boys, really) ogled me enough at my current weight and I didn't want the hassle of being thinner. (I'm asexual so this was a real problem on a college campus.) It was only when I realized that I was sabotaging myself and my health because of others' reactions toward me that I started losing weight. Now I don't care if people stare--my glare of death is very practiced and effective.

This has always been my excuse too....I have been told by so many guys that I am already hot, why lose weight. I even had a guy on here one of my supports who had lost over 100lbs himself tell me if I was his gf he would tell me not to lose weight! After the man i was dating trying to sabotage me by taking me out for italian every chance he got, or showing up right before I went to the gym, and "forgetting" his tennis shoes....made me step away from that relationship. We are still friends but I dont know if I could trust him not to rry to make me comfortable....just so he doesn't feel like he has to exercise. His words exactly were "please dont lose weight you look great...you are gonna make me have to step up my game and have to lose weight too." And "i like thick girls, what if i dont find you attractive anymore" and then he laughed and said he was kidding....I was suffering from sciatica, and I was wearing holes in my jeans from my thighs rubbing together...my favorite plus size store where i bought all of my jeans went out of business...i was freaking out . I want to be a runner, i always have dreams of running , like it was easy and fun to run....i want to make that a reality.

crazygooselady · October 2015

That I shouldn't try to diet because my young teen daughter would think that weight was all that mattered.

And, that I couldn't eat the same food as everyone else in the family, because it was a diet. And if I did eat different then it was being a bad example.....

What I realized is that I need to do this for me. And to be healthy for my family. And yes, we can all eat the same food, I just need to refrain from seconds and thirds.

All the Lies

Replies

Categories