I've lost an elephant's penis

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Replies

  • Livgetfit
    Livgetfit Posts: 352 Member
    wrenak wrote: »
    A small bale of hay and an average human brain so far. Shooting for something between a newborn giraffe and an average adult woman.

    I didn't notice the "average american woman". Looked up and saw that not only is she my height, she's 4lbs less than me. Who'd have thought I'd ever be so freakin' excited about being average!
  • Livgetfit
    Livgetfit Posts: 352 Member
    sodapoppin28 wrote: »
    I've lost an average two year old, so long my child.

    Thank you. I had a good hard giggle!
  • lynn_glenmont
    lynn_glenmont Posts: 10,098 Member
    Do you remember where you were the last time you saw the elephant's penis?
    And, since this is the Internet, where no one knows who anybody really is, by any chance are you an elephant?
  • Emmy360
    Emmy360 Posts: 69 Member
    I've almost lost a newborn baby i'd like to loose a 2 month old baby horse. Hard work!
  • Livgetfit
    Livgetfit Posts: 352 Member
    edited November 2015
    @lynn_glenmont you'd think I'd remember where I left a 60lb elephant penis but alas, no I do not.

    Incidently, this proves I am not an elephant myself because if I was I'd never have forgotten :smile:
  • Wiseandcurious
    Wiseandcurious Posts: 730 Member
    A tire so far, but shooting for two tires and a small bale of hay... Or, a newborn calf.
  • Livgetfit
    Livgetfit Posts: 352 Member
    UPDATE: I'm the OP & I have not lost "fats and oils an average American eats in a year" and reached my healthy weight range :-)
  • Bshmerlie
    Bshmerlie Posts: 1,026 Member
    I've lost an Irish setter but I'd like to lose an average fashion model. That way I could say I've lost a whole other person.
  • aussie_girl_del_runner_5
    aussie_girl_del_runner_5 Posts: 303 Member
    Livgetfit wrote: »
    UPDATE: I'm the OP & I have not lost "fats and oils an average American eats in a year" and reached my healthy weight range :-)

    Congratulations!
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    Unknown
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  • MalkinMagic71
    MalkinMagic71 Posts: 1,433 Member
    I've lost an elephants penis and an average human brain... lol!
  • snowdancer03
    snowdancer03 Posts: 238 Member
    Lol! This post is great! I have lost a bald eagle so far and aiming for a cinder block!
  • ARGriffy
    ARGriffy Posts: 1,002 Member
    I've lost a 2 year old...anyone seen them?!
  • soapsandropes
    soapsandropes Posts: 269 Member
    Aiming for an average house cat loss (although my cat is also a little chubby and needs to lose a dozen doughnuts), but only at a rack of baby back ribs so far. I love this list!
  • glassyo
    glassyo Posts: 7,760 Member
    I've lost the red meat an average american eats in a year but I *really* like the irony of an average fashion model. :)
  • debrakgoogins
    debrakgoogins Posts: 2,033 Member
    I'm not sure how you got an elephant penis in the first place but I am happy that you lost it. I'm working on muscle so not losing but I would like to lose the amount of space that a 5 gallon bottle of water occupies.
  • SoulOfRusalka
    SoulOfRusalka Posts: 1,201 Member
    edited December 2015
    I had no idea the complete OED weighed more than I do. That's reassuring! So far I have lost a chihuahua... one day I hope to accomplish my goal of losing a two year old child. (Although at one point I did lose and then regain almost an entire human leg...)
  • Livgetfit
    Livgetfit Posts: 352 Member
    glassyo wrote: »
    I've lost the red meat an average american eats in a year but I *really* like the irony of an average fashion model. :)

    I don't need to lose that much but it'd be so satisfying to be able to say that I lost a Cara Delevingne :p
  • GBrady43068
    GBrady43068 Posts: 1,256 Member
    edited December 2015
    An elephant's heart being sat upon by a guinea pig at present...

    Ultimate goal is: A month's worth of trash (with a perfectly good Chihuahua being thrown out as well...guess I'm a heartless b*a*s*t*a*r*d! :p )
  • Livgetfit
    Livgetfit Posts: 352 Member
    GBrady43068 wrote: »
    An elephant's heart being sat upon by a guinea pig at present...

    Ultimate goal is: A month's worth of trash (with a perfectly good Chihuahua being thrown out as well...guess I'm a heartless b*a*s*t*a*r*d! :p )

    He'll understand...
  • glassyo
    glassyo Posts: 7,760 Member
    Livgetfit wrote: »
    glassyo wrote: »
    I've lost the red meat an average american eats in a year but I *really* like the irony of an average fashion model. :)

    I don't need to lose that much but it'd be so satisfying to be able to say that I lost a Cara Delevingne :p

    I might go for those last extra few pounds just so I can say it. It really appeals to my sense of humor (even tho not many others will get the joke). :)
  • Livgetfit
    Livgetfit Posts: 352 Member
    glassyo wrote: »
    Livgetfit wrote: »
    glassyo wrote: »
    I've lost the red meat an average american eats in a year but I *really* like the irony of an average fashion model. :)

    I don't need to lose that much but it'd be so satisfying to be able to say that I lost a Cara Delevingne :p

    I might go for those last extra few pounds just so I can say it. It really appeals to my sense of humor (even tho not many others will get the joke). :)

    Others not getting the joke is half the fun! We can have our own private Awesome Humour Club - No Supermodels Allowed
  • AlliVaughan
    AlliVaughan Posts: 1 Member
    An automobile tire but I have to lose a newborn calf!
  • Livgetfit
    Livgetfit Posts: 352 Member
    AlliVaughan wrote: »
    An automobile tire but I have to lose a newborn calf!

    You WILL lose a newborn calf!
  • pirate_john_75
    pirate_john_75 Posts: 96 Member
    I've lost my mind. How much does that weigh?
  • lingo10
    lingo10 Posts: 305 Member
    LOL the title made me laugh, what a grabber! But yeah, I lost an average housecat :) lol
  • rustyquinn
    rustyquinn Posts: 41 Member
    Livgetfit wrote: »
    ....and a chihuahua!

    Shooting for an Irish Setter. How about you guys?

    1 pound = a Guinea Pig
    1.5 pounds = a dozen Krispy Kreme glazed donuts
    2 pounds = a rack of baby back ribs
    3 pounds = an average human brain
    4 pounds = an ostrich egg
    5 pounds = a Chihuahua
    6 pounds = a human’s skin
    7.5 pounds = an average newborn
    8 pounds = a human head
    10 pounds= chemical additives an American consumes each year
    11 pounds = an average housecat
    12 pounds = a Bald Eagle
    15 pounds = 10 dozen large eggs
    16 pounds = a sperm whale’s brain
    20 pounds = an automobile tire
    23 pounds = amount of pizza an average American eats in a year
    24 pounds = a 3-gallon tub of super premium ice cream
    25 pounds = an average 2 year old
    30 pounds = amount of cheese an average American eats in a year
    33 pounds = a cinder block
    36 pounds = a mid-size microwave
    40 pounds = a 5-gallon bottle of water or an average human leg
    44 pounds = an elephant’s heart
    50 pounds = a small bale of hay
    55 pounds = a 5000 BTU air conditioner
    60 pounds = an elephant’s penis (yep, weights more than his heart!)
    66 pounds = fats and oils an average American eats in a year
    70 pounds = an Irish Setter
    77 pounds = a gold brick
    80 pounds = the World’s Largest Ball of Tape
    90 pounds = a newborn calf
    100 pounds = a 2 month old horse
    111 pounds = red meat an average American eats in a year
    117 pounds = an average fashion model (and she’s 5’11”)
    118 pounds = the complete Encyclopedia Britannica
    120 pounds = amount of trash you throw away in a month
    130 pounds = a newborn giraffe
    138 pounds = potatoes an average American eats in a year
    140 pounds = refined sugar an average American eats in a year
    144 pounds = an average adult woman (and she’s 5’4”)
    150 pounds = the complete Oxford English Dictionary
    187 pounds = an average adult man
    200 pounds = 2 Bloodhounds
    235 pounds = Arnold Schwarzenegger
    300 pounds = an average football lineman
    400 pounds = a Welsh pony

    Lol this is fantastic. I have lost a human's skin. Hoping to lose a total of a 2 month horse.

    Kinda puts thongs in perspective.
  • garada3
    garada3 Posts: 1 Member
    I have lost a baby horse!!!! Fashion model is my next goal....
  • Oiney1
    Oiney1 Posts: 6 Member
    Currently down a chihuahua and half a Guinea pig, aiming for a small bale of hay or a 5000 btu air conditioner:)
  • PaulaWallaDingDong
    PaulaWallaDingDong Posts: 4,647 Member
    edited May 2016
    I'd like to trade my lame ball of tape for an elephant's penis, a human head, one of them newborns, a dozen donuts, and an extra brain on the side. This is gonna be one hell of a party.
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