Do people treat you differently?

llUndecidedll wrote: »

Coworkers whom I've never exchanged more than five words with during the past few years, ask about my weight loss progress and routine on a regular basis. They're more friendly I guess you could say, but I guess I could also appear to be more approachable to them.

This ^^

I've been at my place of employment for 2 years, but it has only been in the past 4-5 months or so that people have started talking to me. It's like I've emerged from a cloaking device.

And it is like they are actually taking me more seriously.

bacs wrote: »

I went from always having been fit to being overweight. It was interesting that I became invisible.

Yup. I can understand. I was accustomed to being looked at twice. Now I have to speak up to get attention.

For me, random people on the street smile at me or start conversation with me.

Definitely much more male and sometimes female attention. I got hit on at 250 lbs, but not the double and triple looks like now. That took a lot of getting used to.

The salespeople at clothing stores seem more eager to help me for the most part compared to when I was overweight.

I get a lot of free things. For example I got a free burrito at Chipotle because the guy preparing my order liked my smile/bubbliness which was kind of him.

I get more project offers at work. It's like I'm taken more seriously than before.

I still have the same personality, just 5 sizes smaller and very fit. Some days I miss being a little invisible and being able to fly under the radar to be honest, but I love my life now and wouldn't trade.

bacs wrote: »

I went from always having been fit to being overweight. It was interesting that I became invisible. In general getting older and heavier really does make you a non entity to the general population.

Yup.
And I couldn't get a job easily either. I had to work much harder in interviews than when I was thinner.

Lost the weight and suddenly people see you, like you, and want to hire you.

Now that I'm heavier again, older and not working, I really do feel pretty invisible.

Since I have lost weight I treat myself so much better and I have a better outlook on the world around me. To me, that's what matters the most.

I agree with Triskele2. Being happy in your own skin gives you confidence & a confident person is more likely to make eye contact with others & appear more approachable in general (by their body language).

I am pretty sure for most people it's due to increased confidence and approachability a lot more than to looking physically different... The last time I can remember anyone treating me badly for being fat was in middle school. Conversations, smiles, all that has been happening at a reasonable rate. My coworkers have always treated me according to my behaviour and results at work, and how I treated them.

That said, some of the çomments make me think may be it's due to the local mores too... Apparently in some parts of the world strangers think nothing of commenting on your body

The Halo Effect is a thing ~ what is beautiful is good.

What is The Halo Effect

When I was younger it used to bother me because I would rather be judged (either negatively or positively) on who I actually am rather who I am assumed to be. Now, I have become acclimatised to it more and it bothers me less.

I am still very uncomfortable around people, in person. I'm doing little things now to try to loosen up, but I progress slowly. That's okay, I figure I have until the day I die to get this all right.

What I do find incredibly amusing are the bold individuals who come right up to me and let me know what they think of me. So far it has been mostly positive. I've had young people try to get me to pay them some attention by saying hello to me as they pass by with their friends, as I'm tunnel visioning in on my walks to and from my destinations.

I did have a passing stranger once rhetorically ask a few of his nearby friends if they'd also find it funny had he punched me in my face. The frequency of positive encounters have completely outweighed the negative, so far.

Many pounds ago, while I was out for a walk, I once watched a physically fit woman wearing very flattering clothing walk down a street by herself. She definitely had a lot of attention from the enraptured men passing by. She even managed to ask one of them to escort her to the end of the street, I'm assuming she felt unsafe alone. When she got to the end of the street, she thanked him, they parted, and she continued on to her destination.

I found it amazing to watch since I sometimes struggle with setting boundaries. I worry when smiling to strangers who let me know they liked looking at me are somehow leading people on. I prefer hiding still. Right now, I don't know if the comfort I get from anonymity ever has to change.