Do people treat you differently?
Livgetfit
Posts: 352 Member
I am just wondering if anyone who has gone from obese to overweight or overweight to healthy or all three, has noticed that people treated them differently at those points?
I have noticed that shop assistants in clothing stores are much more attentive to me now I am smaller. I am hyper-aware in retail environments because I used to store manage & mystery shop so this change is supremely obvious to me. It irritates me because I had money when I was obese too but I was apparently less deserving of service.
I also noticed, having started a new job as a "slimmer" woman, that my colleagues don't make comments on my healthy lunches. I suppose they look at my size and think it makes sense. This one is a huge relief! (In my last job I started at 17kg heavier and one of my male colleagues once said to me "I just realised that we don't scrutinise anybody else lunch the way we scrutinise yours. I'm sorry")
What changes if any have you noticed?
I have noticed that shop assistants in clothing stores are much more attentive to me now I am smaller. I am hyper-aware in retail environments because I used to store manage & mystery shop so this change is supremely obvious to me. It irritates me because I had money when I was obese too but I was apparently less deserving of service.
I also noticed, having started a new job as a "slimmer" woman, that my colleagues don't make comments on my healthy lunches. I suppose they look at my size and think it makes sense. This one is a huge relief! (In my last job I started at 17kg heavier and one of my male colleagues once said to me "I just realised that we don't scrutinise anybody else lunch the way we scrutinise yours. I'm sorry")
What changes if any have you noticed?
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Men hit on me. Never ever used to happen. I do not care for this.0
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More non-sexual attention from the opposite sex for sure. I had been going into my local newsagents 3-4 times a week die a year and a half, for snacks and stuff when I was fat. The lady who owned the shop must have said two words to me in that time. I take a few month absence when I wasn't really snacking on junk, and the first time I go back in there, suddenly shes starting up conversations, asking my name, asking about my day etc.
Other guys don't react any differently that I have noticed.0 -
I went from always having been fit to being overweight. It was interesting that I became invisible. In general getting older and heavier really does make you a non entity to the general population.
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Men hit on me. Never ever used to happen. I do not care for this.
Lol, my friend you crack me up.
Since I got to a size 10AU/6US, I have had 3 bus drivers give me free rides. Three! Like, what is that?!I went from always having been fit to being overweight. It was interesting that I became invisible. In general getting older and heavier really does make you a non entity to the general population.
This is so real for me. I was invisible throughout my entire early 20s as a result of my weight - I was invisible not just because the heaviness made me unattractive but because the heaviness made me hide myself too.
I remember starting to hide more after, at 19, a stranger tried give me her cab in the rain because she thought I was pregnant. I was so ashamed but so lost so I covered myself more and hid.0 -
An incredibly indirect way to convey he likes what he sees I guess. There's probably no universe in which he thinks you'll prostitute yourself for a few tickets, but we men are weird sometimes. Once when I was young and worked in retail, I gave my staff discount to a pretty lady once. Immediately after I realised it was a dick move by me, and am ashamed I did it.1 -
It is a fact that being non obese often leads others to take us more serious. What cracks me up after losing my fat face and growing a beard so it did not look too thin some people started saying I looked like Sean Connery. They never said that when I was fat with no beard.
I learned at around the age 10-12 that fat people where not to be taken serious from my father.
It was a Saturday afternoon and were were working in the fields. I asked dad if we could stop about 3 PM and go to town (20 miles) for the rest of the day. He said that I talked like a fat man and to get back to working.
I remember this like it was yesterday. I expect other kids over the years got the same message. Back then obese people were rare.0 -
i lost 150 pounds and suddenly now i am visible to people
people treat me much better overall and honestly it pisses me off how *kitten* i was treated as a 300 pound women compared to now
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salembambi wrote: »i lost 150 pounds and suddenly now i am visible to people
people treat me much better overall and honestly it pisses me off how *kitten* i was treated as a 300 pound women compared to now
Congratulations on your loss.
I'm sorry you've gone through this too. People are definitely not invisible to me now but I think perhaps I am overly aware of other peoples sizes now....I don't like this about myself either.1 -
Yeah. Not even at my goal weight and I've already noticed a difference. I matter more, now.
Whatever.0 -
Everyone treats me better. I've lost more than 90 pounds.
What is really disheartening to me is that friends and family members treat me differently too. These are the people who know that I gained weight due to an illness which almost killed me.
I actually did get hit on when I weighed 300 pounds...but now it sometimes happens 5+ times/day instead of just every once in a while. Sometimes it is a bit overwhelming.0 -
60 pounds down and I haven't noticed, but I am quite socially oblivious at times (it once took me about three months to realize someone was hitting on me...).
I don't really notice people treating me bad, either, apart from a few people who openly mocked me to my face. That at least I understood.0 -
Look what Google found from the past.
community.myfitnesspal.com/en/discussion/90165/fat-people-are-invisible-somehow/p10 -
azulvioleta6 wrote: »
I actually did get hit on when I weighed 300 pounds...but now it sometimes happens 5+ times/day instead of just every once in a while. Sometimes it is a bit overwhelming.
Good lord! I imagine this is that you exude confidence as well as both inner & outer beauty.
P.s fancy grabbing a bite sometime? lol
rankinsect wrote: »60 pounds down and I haven't noticed, but I am quite socially oblivious at times (it once took me about three months to realize someone was hitting on me...).
I don't really notice people treating me bad, either, apart from a few people who openly mocked me to my face. That at least I understood.
I wish I was more like you because at the end of the day, what does it matter as long as we treat ourselves & others in a way we can be proud of0 -
When I was overweight, I was pretty oblivious to the fact that I was overweight. It wasn't until I saw some bad pictures that I really realized how heavy I was. So, I didnt notice a trend of bad/worse treatment than I get now.
That said, I do remember one big difference. I love animal prints - giraffe, cheetah, snakeskin, whatever. I remember one time wearing some sort of animal print to the bar when I was overweight and a bounce said something about me being a safari creature and should be in the zoo. Now when I wear animal print, I only get positive comments, not you're-a-hippo types of comments.0 -
I haven't really noticed a difference. I think I'm a bit more outgoing, more apt to smile at passersby, etc.0
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When I was overweight, I was pretty oblivious to the fact that I was overweight. It wasn't until I saw some bad pictures that I really realized how heavy I was. So, I didnt notice a trend of bad/worse treatment than I get now.
That said, I do remember one big difference. I love animal prints - giraffe, cheetah, snakeskin, whatever. I remember one time wearing some sort of animal print to the bar when I was overweight and a bounce said something about me being a safari creature and should be in the zoo. Now when I wear animal print, I only get positive comments, not you're-a-hippo types of comments.
I want to inflict physical pain on that bouncer...1 -
azulvioleta6 wrote: »
I actually did get hit on when I weighed 300 pounds...but now it sometimes happens 5+ times/day instead of just every once in a while. Sometimes it is a bit overwhelming.
Good lord! I imagine this is that you exude confidence as well as both inner & outer beauty.
P.s fancy grabbing a bite sometime? lolrankinsect wrote: »60 pounds down and I haven't noticed, but I am quite socially oblivious at times (it once took me about three months to realize someone was hitting on me...).
I don't really notice people treating me bad, either, apart from a few people who openly mocked me to my face. That at least I understood.
I wish I was more like you because at the end of the day, what does it matter as long as we treat ourselves & others in a way we can be proud of
I'm definitely not pretty, so I'm not sure what the heck I exude. I am a dancer, so I think that it may have something to do with moving well or being physically confident.
About 20% of the people who hit on me ARE women.
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azulvioleta6 wrote: »azulvioleta6 wrote: »
I actually did get hit on when I weighed 300 pounds...but now it sometimes happens 5+ times/day instead of just every once in a while. Sometimes it is a bit overwhelming.
Good lord! I imagine this is that you exude confidence as well as both inner & outer beauty.
P.s fancy grabbing a bite sometime? lolrankinsect wrote: »60 pounds down and I haven't noticed, but I am quite socially oblivious at times (it once took me about three months to realize someone was hitting on me...).
I don't really notice people treating me bad, either, apart from a few people who openly mocked me to my face. That at least I understood.
I wish I was more like you because at the end of the day, what does it matter as long as we treat ourselves & others in a way we can be proud of
I'm definitely not pretty, so I'm not sure what the heck I exude. I am a dancer, so I think that it may have something to do with moving well or being physically confident.
About 20% of the people who hit on me ARE women.
You are too pretty 0 -
Coworkers whom I've never exchanged more than five words with during the past few years, ask about my weight loss progress and routine on a regular basis. They're more friendly I guess you could say, but I guess I could also appear to be more approachable to them.
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kshama2001 wrote: »azulvioleta6 wrote: »azulvioleta6 wrote: »
I actually did get hit on when I weighed 300 pounds...but now it sometimes happens 5+ times/day instead of just every once in a while. Sometimes it is a bit overwhelming.
Good lord! I imagine this is that you exude confidence as well as both inner & outer beauty.
P.s fancy grabbing a bite sometime? lolrankinsect wrote: »60 pounds down and I haven't noticed, but I am quite socially oblivious at times (it once took me about three months to realize someone was hitting on me...).
I don't really notice people treating me bad, either, apart from a few people who openly mocked me to my face. That at least I understood.
I wish I was more like you because at the end of the day, what does it matter as long as we treat ourselves & others in a way we can be proud of
I'm definitely not pretty, so I'm not sure what the heck I exude. I am a dancer, so I think that it may have something to do with moving well or being physically confident.
About 20% of the people who hit on me ARE women.
You are too pretty
Agreed!0 -
llUndecidedll wrote: »Coworkers whom I've never exchanged more than five words with during the past few years, ask about my weight loss progress and routine on a regular basis. They're more friendly I guess you could say, but I guess I could also appear to be more approachable to them.
This ^^
I've been at my place of employment for 2 years, but it has only been in the past 4-5 months or so that people have started talking to me. It's like I've emerged from a cloaking device.
And it is like they are actually taking me more seriously.
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When I started losing weight this summer I was 139 at 5'3" so I wasn't in the overweight category just yet, but I was inching my way there. Now I'm 114.6. The attention from men increased which, like @ARGriffy, I do not care for. When I was in the mid 120s, I got compliments from some of the other women at work and a few "How did you do it?" type questions. Now the women at work either treat me exactly the same as they did when I was 139 (didn't care about my existence or just friendly as usual), or I need to "stop losing weight". I was told I need to still look like a woman, which is highly offensive as women come in all shapes and sizes. The security guard at work pulled me aside the other day and said I lost a bunch of weight, asked me how I did it, then said to be careful because I don't want to lose my figure and I'm getting very thin. As I walked away and up the stairs he watched me walk and said, "Oh, nevermind, it's STILL there!" and I stuck up my middle finger.0
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The security guard at work pulled me aside the other day and said I lost a bunch of weight, asked me how I did it, then said to be careful because I don't want to lose my figure and I'm getting very thin. As I walked away and up the stairs he watched me walk and said, "Oh, nevermind, it's STILL there!" and I stuck up my middle finger.
I'm starting to see a pattern that I do not like!
Does anyone think they are/were guilty of these things themselves? You'd think we'd be very conscious having felt the brunt of it ourselves but I am now thinking I do, say or think things I'm not proud of...
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For me, random people on the street smile at me or start conversation with me.
Definitely much more male and sometimes female attention. I got hit on at 250 lbs, but not the double and triple looks like now. That took a lot of getting used to.
The salespeople at clothing stores seem more eager to help me for the most part compared to when I was overweight.
I get a lot of free things. For example I got a free burrito at Chipotle because the guy preparing my order liked my smile/bubbliness which was kind of him.
I get more project offers at work. It's like I'm taken more seriously than before.
I still have the same personality, just 5 sizes smaller and very fit. Some days I miss being a little invisible and being able to fly under the radar to be honest, but I love my life now and wouldn't trade.0 -
Me too! I really like this one!rainbow198 wrote: »For me, random people on the street smile at me or start conversation with me.
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I went from always having been fit to being overweight. It was interesting that I became invisible. In general getting older and heavier really does make you a non entity to the general population.
Yup.
And I couldn't get a job easily either. I had to work much harder in interviews than when I was thinner.
Lost the weight and suddenly people see you, like you, and want to hire you.
Now that I'm heavier again, older and not working, I really do feel pretty invisible.0 -
I understand what people are saying about being treated differently pre-weight loss, but I believe at least part of it was my own fault.
Before I lost so much weight I was unhappy, introverted, and generally not a positive person. Upon losing weight I have become 200% more perky, upbeat, outgoing, energetic, positive, and generally more fun.
I wouldn't have wanted to see or be around me before either. While I don't think this accounts for ALL of the way overweight people are treated, I do believe it's a big part of it. I know at least two very overweight women who are extremely outgoing, happy, super fun people to be around and I watch people flock to be with them regardless of their weight.
Just something to think about.1 -
I understand what people are saying about being treated differently pre-weight loss, but I believe at least part of it was my own fault.
Before I lost so much weight I was unhappy, introverted, and generally not a positive person. Upon losing weight I have become 200% more perky, upbeat, outgoing, energetic, positive, and generally more fun.
I wouldn't have wanted to see or be around me before either. While I don't think this accounts for ALL of the way overweight people are treated, I do believe it's a big part of it. I know at least two very overweight women who are extremely outgoing, happy, super fun people to be around and I watch people flock to be with them regardless of their weight.
Just something to think about.
Yeah I think there is certainly something to what you are saying. I definitely hide myself away.
It is all very interesting0
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