We broke up because...
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He disappeared with our furniture one day0
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She sold our furniture and said it was stolen0
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she didn't appreciate my monastic lifestyle choices0
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I liked sitting on chairs. He liked sitting on the floor. I just couldn't anymore0
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Skating was her life ..no time for me0
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so my blades tore the sheets....big deal!!!!0
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She said I was a skater hater0
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monkey poop everywhere0
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He was shy..wouldn't lift the shirt0
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I made him homemade Monkey Bread and he said it tasted like *kitten*!
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she liked to monkey around0
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He had a thing for animals
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wouldn't allow me to have any pets0
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she wasn't into heavy petting0
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He had too many pets. I felt like I was in a zoo.0
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Asked her to take a BELFIE of me. that was it for her0
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He was such a tease..when my girlfriends came over he dressed just like in his selfie..all that pretending to drop things..tsk tsk bad boy
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She hated my ugly Christmas sweater.0
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she hated that i don't own any Christmas sweaters0
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I needed more cowbellgirl0
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