We broke up because...
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She didn't know what to do with my duck.0
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He always wanted to gag me with his duck0
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She gagged on everything0
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She wouldn't be my sugar mumma0
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She tried to mummify me before I was dead for some sort of artifact scam.0
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He kept a coffin in the bedroom and expected us to both sleep in it0
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He laughed at me..said I had an accent..yet it was him that had an accent not me..0
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Could never accentuate the positive. Always focused on my flaws.0
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Played D&D instead of taking me out0
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Only wanted to go to B&Bs. I liked big city vacations, too.0
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she was mad because I was with my horse more then her0
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She got scurvy and died. The high seas claimed another one.0
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He did this every time we went to the gym.....0 -
She didn't appreciate good form.0
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Posted embarrassing gifs of me0
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Wouldn't shower after her workouts ..pewwwww0
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Wouldn't let me shower alone0
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I was too high maintenance.0
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Hogged the bathroom.0
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True^^ too high maintenance0
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She only called me when she needed maintenance on her home!0
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she got sick of me asking her if "I look fat in these pants."0
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He kept telling me I looked phat. Whoops. I think I misinterpreted.0
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She didn't understand English! ;p0
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Didn't understand my language.. (english ) lol0
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Always spoke in Australian!0
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I was extremely jealous, wanted to kick every dude's *kitten* that said hello to her.0
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Had anger issues0
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She turned green and busted out of her clothes every time she got mad!
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She wanted us to move to a swamp0
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