The DONT'S of weight loss...

13

Replies

  • missyfitz1
    missyfitz1 Posts: 93 Member
    Don't weight everyday


    This actually doesn't work for me. I weigh myself every day to see the tiny up and down fluctuations that can happen. As long as I don't obsess about daily changes in my weight, weighing myself daily is actually helpful. Doing it once a week I find I put too much pressure on that number, whereas if I do it daily and it's just data, it's helpful but I don't freak out about it.
  • missyfitz1
    missyfitz1 Posts: 93 Member
    Don't eat food you don't like.
    Don't be afraid of the scale. Weigh yourself regularly.
    Don't think CICO doesn't apply to you. It does.
    Don't try to change everything at once. You can't.
    Don't believe anything from anybody who wants to sell you something.
    Don't postpone living and enjoying life till you hit goal weight.
    When you enter maintenance, don't stop doing what made you lose (except adjust to fit new calorie needs).
    Don't make things harder than necessary.
    Don't focus solely on weight goals; have behavioral goals.

    Don't focus solely on weight goals is such an important one. You can't control your weight, but you can control your behaviour and that is what will make you successful.
  • sanfromny
    sanfromny Posts: 770 Member
    Don't think that it's only you, sites like MFP wouldn't exist if that was true
    Don't be embarrassed to go to the gym. Everyone is there for the same reason-Health
    Don't let anyone tell you that you can't do it- You Can
    Don't give up when the scale doesn't change- Believe in the process, it will
    Don't forget that slow and steady wins the race
    Don't believe EVERYTHING on the internet...
  • kommodevaran
    kommodevaran Posts: 17,890 Member
    missyfitz1 wrote: »
    Don't weight everyday


    This actually doesn't work for me. I weigh myself every day to see the tiny up and down fluctuations that can happen. As long as I don't obsess about daily changes in my weight, weighing myself daily is actually helpful. Doing it once a week I find I put too much pressure on that number, whereas if I do it daily and it's just data, it's helpful but I don't freak out about it.

    This is one of my pet peeves :# I actually wanted to write "Weigh yourself daily" exactly because of this. A large jump from one day to the next can't be fat - but from one week to the next, it could be, and I'd have no way to know, if I don't weigh daily.
  • Need2Exerc1se
    Need2Exerc1se Posts: 13,575 Member
    Don't overeat.
  • Mapalicious
    Mapalicious Posts: 412 Member
    edited February 2016
    • Don't think being skinny will solve all your problems and make you happy in and of itself.
    • Don't assume you can or should offer to 'help' others lose weight, especially family.
    • Don't ever think the way YOU lost weight is the way EVERYONE should lose weight. (But offer your advice generously, when asked.)
    • Don't take on a skinny-pretty-b*tch attitude just cause you are 2/3 of those things. Wear lemur onesies. Make fun of yourself. Stay goofy.
    • Don't worry if you gain a little of the weight back in hard times. You can go right back down now, because you have the skills!
    • Don't dress so darn slutty now just because you feel so confident in your body and look great in that short skirt, Mapalicious. Work is a professional environment. Woops - learned that one fast.
    • Don't forget to feed your fiance more food, because he has the metabolism of a rhino. He will lose 20 lbs by accident while you just struggled to lose 8. Pour olive oil on his food. Live vicariously through his voracious food consumption.
    • Be patient. Be persistent. Be kind to yourself. Your worth is not based on the number on the scale.


    I lost 125 lbs. That's some things I think about.
  • LivingtheLeanDream
    LivingtheLeanDream Posts: 13,342 Member
    missyfitz1 wrote: »
    Don't weight everyday


    This actually doesn't work for me. I weigh myself every day to see the tiny up and down fluctuations that can happen. As long as I don't obsess about daily changes in my weight, weighing myself daily is actually helpful. Doing it once a week I find I put too much pressure on that number, whereas if I do it daily and it's just data, it's helpful but I don't freak out about it.

    This is one of my pet peeves :# I actually wanted to write "Weigh yourself daily" exactly because of this. A large jump from one day to the next can't be fat - but from one week to the next, it could be, and I'd have no way to know, if I don't weigh daily.

    Nothing wrong with daily weigh ins, they help us understand fluctuation hows/whys.
    I see mfp friends stressing all the time over the scale when a daily weigh in and using a trending app would make everything clear.
  • SeanNJ
    SeanNJ Posts: 153 Member
    SeanNJ wrote: »
    mita271 wrote: »
    Oh and DO NOT forget that by just making a decision and beeing here ur are already a WINNER

    Sorry, but that's awful. Diabetes, heart disease, and cancer don't respect participation trophies.

    Um.... have you checked the sensitivity on your righteous indignance-o-meter lately? Methinks you need to turn it down.

    Putting in the effort to LOSE the weight, by being here, is worthy of a slap on the back. That's what she meant.

    And I disagree. It's the equivalent of changing a Facebook profile picture in support of <insert thing here>, i.e. slacktivism. Makes you feel better about having done something without having actually done anything at all. It shouldn't be encouraged.
  • CoffeeNCardio
    CoffeeNCardio Posts: 1,847 Member
    SeanNJ wrote: »
    SeanNJ wrote: »
    mita271 wrote: »
    Oh and DO NOT forget that by just making a decision and beeing here ur are already a WINNER

    Sorry, but that's awful. Diabetes, heart disease, and cancer don't respect participation trophies.

    Um.... have you checked the sensitivity on your righteous indignance-o-meter lately? Methinks you need to turn it down.

    Putting in the effort to LOSE the weight, by being here, is worthy of a slap on the back. That's what she meant.

    And I disagree. It's the equivalent of changing a Facebook profile picture in support of <insert thing here>, i.e. slacktivism. Makes you feel better about having done something without having actually done anything at all. It shouldn't be encouraged.

    Wow you're a tough customer. I would clearly epic fail at being your friend. How do the people in your life live up to your massive expectations?
  • SeanNJ
    SeanNJ Posts: 153 Member
    SeanNJ wrote: »
    SeanNJ wrote: »
    mita271 wrote: »
    Oh and DO NOT forget that by just making a decision and beeing here ur are already a WINNER

    Sorry, but that's awful. Diabetes, heart disease, and cancer don't respect participation trophies.

    Um.... have you checked the sensitivity on your righteous indignance-o-meter lately? Methinks you need to turn it down.

    Putting in the effort to LOSE the weight, by being here, is worthy of a slap on the back. That's what she meant.

    And I disagree. It's the equivalent of changing a Facebook profile picture in support of <insert thing here>, i.e. slacktivism. Makes you feel better about having done something without having actually done anything at all. It shouldn't be encouraged.

    Wow you're a tough customer. I would clearly epic fail at being your friend. How do the people in your life live up to your massive expectations?

    The only expectation I have of them is that they not expect me to blow smoke up their *kitten*.
  • harrybananas
    harrybananas Posts: 292 Member
    SeanNJ wrote: »
    SeanNJ wrote: »
    SeanNJ wrote: »
    mita271 wrote: »
    Oh and DO NOT forget that by just making a decision and beeing here ur are already a WINNER

    Sorry, but that's awful. Diabetes, heart disease, and cancer don't respect participation trophies.

    Um.... have you checked the sensitivity on your righteous indignance-o-meter lately? Methinks you need to turn it down.

    Putting in the effort to LOSE the weight, by being here, is worthy of a slap on the back. That's what she meant.

    And I disagree. It's the equivalent of changing a Facebook profile picture in support of <insert thing here>, i.e. slacktivism. Makes you feel better about having done something without having actually done anything at all. It shouldn't be encouraged.

    Wow you're a tough customer. I would clearly epic fail at being your friend. How do the people in your life live up to your massive expectations?

    The only expectation I have of them is that they not expect me to blow smoke up their *kitten*.

    creation_of_man_fist_bump.jpg
  • hellonew2015
    hellonew2015 Posts: 327 Member
    Don't call it a diet, it is a healthy way of living and to enjoy it for the rest of your life! Love it and embrace it.
  • CoffeeNCardio
    CoffeeNCardio Posts: 1,847 Member
    SeanNJ wrote: »
    SeanNJ wrote: »
    SeanNJ wrote: »
    mita271 wrote: »
    Oh and DO NOT forget that by just making a decision and beeing here ur are already a WINNER

    Sorry, but that's awful. Diabetes, heart disease, and cancer don't respect participation trophies.

    Um.... have you checked the sensitivity on your righteous indignance-o-meter lately? Methinks you need to turn it down.

    Putting in the effort to LOSE the weight, by being here, is worthy of a slap on the back. That's what she meant.

    And I disagree. It's the equivalent of changing a Facebook profile picture in support of <insert thing here>, i.e. slacktivism. Makes you feel better about having done something without having actually done anything at all. It shouldn't be encouraged.

    Wow you're a tough customer. I would clearly epic fail at being your friend. How do the people in your life live up to your massive expectations?

    The only expectation I have of them is that they not expect me to blow smoke up their *kitten*.

    And congratulating someone for finally getting their **** together and starting to lose weight is within the category of smoke-blowing for you?
  • Mapalicious
    Mapalicious Posts: 412 Member
    SeanNJ wrote: »
    SeanNJ wrote: »
    mita271 wrote: »
    Oh and DO NOT forget that by just making a decision and beeing here ur are already a WINNER

    Sorry, but that's awful. Diabetes, heart disease, and cancer don't respect participation trophies.

    Um.... have you checked the sensitivity on your righteous indignance-o-meter lately? Methinks you need to turn it down.

    Putting in the effort to LOSE the weight, by being here, is worthy of a slap on the back. That's what she meant.

    And I disagree. It's the equivalent of changing a Facebook profile picture in support of <insert thing here>, i.e. slacktivism. Makes you feel better about having done something without having actually done anything at all. It shouldn't be encouraged.

    Wow you're a tough customer. I would clearly epic fail at being your friend. How do the people in your life live up to your massive expectations?

    I'm with you, girl ;) He's broken my rule of "don't expect that every one can lose weight the same way that you did"

    We've got different paths...and for me, when I was morbidly obese, it took me SO MUCH WORK just to get to the point where i recognized the relationship between my body, food, and before I could accept the need to lose weight without spiraling into self-hatred. So for me it was AMAZING that I got on MFP at all. And I never would have lost 125 lbs if I didn't do all that work do even begin the journey. It doesn't work for everyone...but it sure did for me!
  • JeromeBarry1
    JeromeBarry1 Posts: 10,179 Member
    You're not supposed to change your weight. You're supposed to change the way you live.
  • SeanNJ
    SeanNJ Posts: 153 Member
    edited February 2016
    SeanNJ wrote: »
    SeanNJ wrote: »
    SeanNJ wrote: »
    mita271 wrote: »
    Oh and DO NOT forget that by just making a decision and beeing here ur are already a WINNER

    Sorry, but that's awful. Diabetes, heart disease, and cancer don't respect participation trophies.

    Um.... have you checked the sensitivity on your righteous indignance-o-meter lately? Methinks you need to turn it down.

    Putting in the effort to LOSE the weight, by being here, is worthy of a slap on the back. That's what she meant.

    And I disagree. It's the equivalent of changing a Facebook profile picture in support of <insert thing here>, i.e. slacktivism. Makes you feel better about having done something without having actually done anything at all. It shouldn't be encouraged.

    Wow you're a tough customer. I would clearly epic fail at being your friend. How do the people in your life live up to your massive expectations?

    The only expectation I have of them is that they not expect me to blow smoke up their *kitten*.

    And congratulating someone for finally getting their **** together and starting to lose weight is within the category of smoke-blowing for you?

    If all they've done is create an account on a website, then uh...yeah. I can go buy a piano tomorrow. Until I actually learn how to play it a little, then it would be disingenuous of me to call myself a piano player, I think.

    But fine...baby steps. Everyone's a winner when they think about doing something.
  • MommyMeggo
    MommyMeggo Posts: 1,222 Member
    #1 Dont compare yourself to others.
    #2 Set realistic goals (longer than you'd like)
    #3 Learn moderation/portion control
    #4 EAT!! And Eat the things you love.
    #5 Dont lose the weight in a method that is not something you can do forever (ie: sustain/ maintain)
  • CoffeeNCardio
    CoffeeNCardio Posts: 1,847 Member
    SeanNJ wrote: »
    SeanNJ wrote: »
    SeanNJ wrote: »
    SeanNJ wrote: »
    mita271 wrote: »
    Oh and DO NOT forget that by just making a decision and beeing here ur are already a WINNER

    Sorry, but that's awful. Diabetes, heart disease, and cancer don't respect participation trophies.

    Um.... have you checked the sensitivity on your righteous indignance-o-meter lately? Methinks you need to turn it down.

    Putting in the effort to LOSE the weight, by being here, is worthy of a slap on the back. That's what she meant.

    And I disagree. It's the equivalent of changing a Facebook profile picture in support of <insert thing here>, i.e. slacktivism. Makes you feel better about having done something without having actually done anything at all. It shouldn't be encouraged.

    Wow you're a tough customer. I would clearly epic fail at being your friend. How do the people in your life live up to your massive expectations?

    The only expectation I have of them is that they not expect me to blow smoke up their *kitten*.

    And congratulating someone for finally getting their **** together and starting to lose weight is within the category of smoke-blowing for you?

    If all they've done is create an account on a website, then uh...yeah. I can go buy a piano tomorrow. Until I actually learn how to play it a little, then it would disingenuous of me to call myself a piano player, I think.

    Then I will be absolutely certain not to congratulate you on finally getting a hobby, should there ever come a time when you elect to go buy a piano. But that's not what I was talking about. Showing up alone, not so much, but being here and sticking around, great first step and well deserving a notation of "hey great first step!".
  • SeanNJ
    SeanNJ Posts: 153 Member
    SeanNJ wrote: »
    SeanNJ wrote: »
    SeanNJ wrote: »
    SeanNJ wrote: »
    mita271 wrote: »
    Oh and DO NOT forget that by just making a decision and beeing here ur are already a WINNER

    Sorry, but that's awful. Diabetes, heart disease, and cancer don't respect participation trophies.

    Um.... have you checked the sensitivity on your righteous indignance-o-meter lately? Methinks you need to turn it down.

    Putting in the effort to LOSE the weight, by being here, is worthy of a slap on the back. That's what she meant.

    And I disagree. It's the equivalent of changing a Facebook profile picture in support of <insert thing here>, i.e. slacktivism. Makes you feel better about having done something without having actually done anything at all. It shouldn't be encouraged.

    Wow you're a tough customer. I would clearly epic fail at being your friend. How do the people in your life live up to your massive expectations?

    The only expectation I have of them is that they not expect me to blow smoke up their *kitten*.

    And congratulating someone for finally getting their **** together and starting to lose weight is within the category of smoke-blowing for you?

    If all they've done is create an account on a website, then uh...yeah. I can go buy a piano tomorrow. Until I actually learn how to play it a little, then it would disingenuous of me to call myself a piano player, I think.

    Then I will be absolutely certain not to congratulate you on finally getting a hobby, should there ever come a time when you elect to go buy a piano. But that's not what I was talking about. Showing up alone, not so much, but being here and sticking around, great first step and well deserving a notation of "hey great first step!".

    No problem with phrasing it that way, but that's not how the OP phrased it, and that matters. The way you stated it has the implication that they're not nearly done, and I'm all for encouragement. But...
    mita271 wrote: »
    Oh and DO NOT forget that by just making a decision and beeing here ur are already a WINNER
    ...is wrong.
  • Mapalicious
    Mapalicious Posts: 412 Member
    SeanNJ wrote: »
    SeanNJ wrote: »
    SeanNJ wrote: »
    SeanNJ wrote: »
    SeanNJ wrote: »
    mita271 wrote: »
    Oh and DO NOT forget that by just making a decision and beeing here ur are already a WINNER

    Sorry, but that's awful. Diabetes, heart disease, and cancer don't respect participation trophies.

    Um.... have you checked the sensitivity on your righteous indignance-o-meter lately? Methinks you need to turn it down.

    Putting in the effort to LOSE the weight, by being here, is worthy of a slap on the back. That's what she meant.

    And I disagree. It's the equivalent of changing a Facebook profile picture in support of <insert thing here>, i.e. slacktivism. Makes you feel better about having done something without having actually done anything at all. It shouldn't be encouraged.

    Wow you're a tough customer. I would clearly epic fail at being your friend. How do the people in your life live up to your massive expectations?

    The only expectation I have of them is that they not expect me to blow smoke up their *kitten*.

    And congratulating someone for finally getting their **** together and starting to lose weight is within the category of smoke-blowing for you?

    If all they've done is create an account on a website, then uh...yeah. I can go buy a piano tomorrow. Until I actually learn how to play it a little, then it would disingenuous of me to call myself a piano player, I think.

    Then I will be absolutely certain not to congratulate you on finally getting a hobby, should there ever come a time when you elect to go buy a piano. But that's not what I was talking about. Showing up alone, not so much, but being here and sticking around, great first step and well deserving a notation of "hey great first step!".

    No problem with phrasing it that way, but that's not how the OP phrased it, and that matters. The way you stated it has the implication that they're not nearly done, and I'm all for encouragement. But...
    mita271 wrote: »
    Oh and DO NOT forget that by just making a decision and beeing here ur are already a WINNER
    ...is wrong.

    Hey there, @SeanNJ - for me and the other poster apparently, just being here (counting my calories at all) WAS a HUGE step that took a lot of work on the way to my 125 lb loss. Clearly, it's not for you.

    Here's one of my weightloss Don'ts: "Don't think that the way YOU lost weight is the way everyone is going to lose weight. We all have different paths."

  • SeanNJ
    SeanNJ Posts: 153 Member
    edited February 2016
    SeanNJ wrote: »
    SeanNJ wrote: »
    SeanNJ wrote: »
    SeanNJ wrote: »
    SeanNJ wrote: »
    mita271 wrote: »
    Oh and DO NOT forget that by just making a decision and beeing here ur are already a WINNER

    Sorry, but that's awful. Diabetes, heart disease, and cancer don't respect participation trophies.

    Um.... have you checked the sensitivity on your righteous indignance-o-meter lately? Methinks you need to turn it down.

    Putting in the effort to LOSE the weight, by being here, is worthy of a slap on the back. That's what she meant.

    And I disagree. It's the equivalent of changing a Facebook profile picture in support of <insert thing here>, i.e. slacktivism. Makes you feel better about having done something without having actually done anything at all. It shouldn't be encouraged.

    Wow you're a tough customer. I would clearly epic fail at being your friend. How do the people in your life live up to your massive expectations?

    The only expectation I have of them is that they not expect me to blow smoke up their *kitten*.

    And congratulating someone for finally getting their **** together and starting to lose weight is within the category of smoke-blowing for you?

    If all they've done is create an account on a website, then uh...yeah. I can go buy a piano tomorrow. Until I actually learn how to play it a little, then it would disingenuous of me to call myself a piano player, I think.

    Then I will be absolutely certain not to congratulate you on finally getting a hobby, should there ever come a time when you elect to go buy a piano. But that's not what I was talking about. Showing up alone, not so much, but being here and sticking around, great first step and well deserving a notation of "hey great first step!".

    No problem with phrasing it that way, but that's not how the OP phrased it, and that matters. The way you stated it has the implication that they're not nearly done, and I'm all for encouragement. But...
    mita271 wrote: »
    Oh and DO NOT forget that by just making a decision and beeing here ur are already a WINNER
    ...is wrong.

    Hey there, @SeanNJ - for me and the other poster apparently, just being here (counting my calories at all) WAS a HUGE step that took a lot of work on the way to my 125 lb loss. Clearly, it's not for you.

    Here's one of my weightloss Don'ts: "Don't think that the way YOU lost weight is the way everyone is going to lose weight. We all have different paths."

    And I congratulate you on your 125 pounds. Well done. But back when you just started out, what effect would the "hey, you're already a winner!" have on your determination? What if you hadn't lost any weight at all? Did you still win by creating an account?

    Effort, and results, matter. A lot. Don't give a procrastinator an easy out by suggesting their first step is worthy of anything more than a "Good for you...NOW GET TO WORK!"

    Oh, and this did work for me. I'm down over 50 lbs now, and I'm very proud of that.
  • puffbrat
    puffbrat Posts: 2,806 Member
    • Don't think being skinny will solve all your problems and make you happy in and of itself.
    • Don't assume you can or should offer to 'help' others lose weight, especially family.
    • Don't ever think the way YOU lost weight is the way EVERYONE should lose weight. (But offer your advice generously, when asked.)
    • Don't take on a skinny-pretty-b*tch attitude just cause you are 2/3 of those things. Wear lemur onesies. Make fun of yourself. Stay goofy.
    • Don't worry if you gain a little of the weight back in hard times. You can go right back down now, because you have the skills!
    • Don't dress so darn slutty now just because you feel so confident in your body and look great in that short skirt, Mapalicious. Work is a professional environment. Woops - learned that one fast.

    • Don't forget to feed your fiance more food, because he has the metabolism of a rhino. He will lose 20 lbs by accident while you just struggled to lose 8. Pour olive oil on his food. Live vicariously through his voracious food consumption.
    • Be patient. Be persistent. Be kind to yourself. Your worth is not based on the number on the scale.


    I lost 125 lbs. That's some things I think about.

    Most of mine have already been mentioned - don't eliminate foods you love, don't let bad days/weekends/weeks derail your journey, don't compare yourself to others, if your husband requires additional calories/carbs at dinner (and dessert nearly every day) then make sure he gets it and try not glower ;)

  • Francl27
    Francl27 Posts: 26,371 Member
    Don't set unrealistic expectations for yourself.
    Don't feel like you should suffer for getting fat and
    Don't make yourself miserable while losing weight
    Don't forget that this is your life. Only you can decide what sort of routine you can live with.

    Don't get upset if nobody says anything about your weight loss for a long while, Nobody said anything to me until I'd lost 40 pounds. Most times they're worried of saying the wrong thing.

    Don't make any changes to your diet that you don't plan on sticking to long-term. Losing weight one way and then changing once you hit maintenance makes for a difficult maintenance.

    Don't forget that all activity is good. It doesn't matter if it's actual "exercise". Just being active around the house, yard, neighborhood, at work...all of that makes a big difference in your calories spent during the day.

    Don't forget to pat yourself on the back when you do well. Every time you stick to your goals or go to the gym when you didn't want to...you deserve to feel good about yourself. Remember to mentally congratulate yourself on the little things.

    Don't feel bad if you have days when you just don't feel motivated. Eating at maintenance for a day or to to regroup isn't the end of the world. Just be sure to log it.

    Don't give up. Take as long as you need to. Take detours and vacations. Just don't quit on yourself. There is no deadline, so only you will know if you've quit. As long as you're still trying, you're still winning.

    Exactly this!
  • CoffeeNCardio
    CoffeeNCardio Posts: 1,847 Member
    SeanNJ wrote: »
    SeanNJ wrote: »
    SeanNJ wrote: »
    SeanNJ wrote: »
    SeanNJ wrote: »
    mita271 wrote: »
    Oh and DO NOT forget that by just making a decision and beeing here ur are already a WINNER

    Sorry, but that's awful. Diabetes, heart disease, and cancer don't respect participation trophies.

    Um.... have you checked the sensitivity on your righteous indignance-o-meter lately? Methinks you need to turn it down.

    Putting in the effort to LOSE the weight, by being here, is worthy of a slap on the back. That's what she meant.

    And I disagree. It's the equivalent of changing a Facebook profile picture in support of <insert thing here>, i.e. slacktivism. Makes you feel better about having done something without having actually done anything at all. It shouldn't be encouraged.

    Wow you're a tough customer. I would clearly epic fail at being your friend. How do the people in your life live up to your massive expectations?

    The only expectation I have of them is that they not expect me to blow smoke up their *kitten*.

    And congratulating someone for finally getting their **** together and starting to lose weight is within the category of smoke-blowing for you?

    If all they've done is create an account on a website, then uh...yeah. I can go buy a piano tomorrow. Until I actually learn how to play it a little, then it would disingenuous of me to call myself a piano player, I think.

    Then I will be absolutely certain not to congratulate you on finally getting a hobby, should there ever come a time when you elect to go buy a piano. But that's not what I was talking about. Showing up alone, not so much, but being here and sticking around, great first step and well deserving a notation of "hey great first step!".

    No problem with phrasing it that way, but that's not how the OP phrased it, and that matters. The way you stated it has the implication that they're not nearly done, and I'm all for encouragement. But...
    mita271 wrote: »
    Oh and DO NOT forget that by just making a decision and beeing here ur are already a WINNER
    ...is wrong.

    Hey there, @SeanNJ - for me and the other poster apparently, just being here (counting my calories at all) WAS a HUGE step that took a lot of work on the way to my 125 lb loss. Clearly, it's not for you.

    Here's one of my weightloss Don'ts: "Don't think that the way YOU lost weight is the way everyone is going to lose weight. We all have different paths."

    Yeah, I gotta go with this. Feelin' the love from the posters on here when I showed up is the reason I'm still here. Maybe it's because women who are fat take a lot more crap for it, so when we are accepted upon our entry into the weight-loss world, and people all treat us like human beings in spite of our weight, we finally develop enough confidence to actually DO the action. I wouldn't be here if the reception had not been as wholly encouraging and people were not as quick (or never said) to say how happy they were I was here and that it was a huge step. I felt like I was brought into the fold of nice people who had been there. I couldn't have lost 26lbs without that feeling. Granted, this doesn't apply to everybody, so @SeanNJ may have had a different experience. Can't expect everyone to feel the same.
  • Mapalicious
    Mapalicious Posts: 412 Member
    SeanNJ wrote: »
    SeanNJ wrote: »
    SeanNJ wrote: »
    SeanNJ wrote: »
    SeanNJ wrote: »
    SeanNJ wrote: »
    mita271 wrote: »
    Oh and DO NOT forget that by just making a decision and beeing here ur are already a WINNER

    Sorry, but that's awful. Diabetes, heart disease, and cancer don't respect participation trophies.

    Um.... have you checked the sensitivity on your righteous indignance-o-meter lately? Methinks you need to turn it down.

    Putting in the effort to LOSE the weight, by being here, is worthy of a slap on the back. That's what she meant.

    And I disagree. It's the equivalent of changing a Facebook profile picture in support of <insert thing here>, i.e. slacktivism. Makes you feel better about having done something without having actually done anything at all. It shouldn't be encouraged.

    Wow you're a tough customer. I would clearly epic fail at being your friend. How do the people in your life live up to your massive expectations?

    The only expectation I have of them is that they not expect me to blow smoke up their *kitten*.

    And congratulating someone for finally getting their **** together and starting to lose weight is within the category of smoke-blowing for you?

    If all they've done is create an account on a website, then uh...yeah. I can go buy a piano tomorrow. Until I actually learn how to play it a little, then it would disingenuous of me to call myself a piano player, I think.

    Then I will be absolutely certain not to congratulate you on finally getting a hobby, should there ever come a time when you elect to go buy a piano. But that's not what I was talking about. Showing up alone, not so much, but being here and sticking around, great first step and well deserving a notation of "hey great first step!".

    No problem with phrasing it that way, but that's not how the OP phrased it, and that matters. The way you stated it has the implication that they're not nearly done, and I'm all for encouragement. But...
    mita271 wrote: »
    Oh and DO NOT forget that by just making a decision and beeing here ur are already a WINNER
    ...is wrong.

    Hey there, @SeanNJ - for me and the other poster apparently, just being here (counting my calories at all) WAS a HUGE step that took a lot of work on the way to my 125 lb loss. Clearly, it's not for you.

    Here's one of my weightloss Don'ts: "Don't think that the way YOU lost weight is the way everyone is going to lose weight. We all have different paths."

    And I congratulate you on your 125 pounds. Well done. But back when you just started out, what affect would the "hey, you're already a winner!" have on your determination? What if you hadn't lost any weight at all? Did you still win by creating an account?

    Effort, and results, matter. A lot. Don't give a procrastinator an easy out by suggesting their first step is worthy of anything more than a "Good for you...NOW GET TO WORK!"

    I absolutely patted myself on the back when I made an account. Because it took 2 years to get myself to that point. It was a long process of learning to have a relationship with my fat body, and recognizing that I COULD lose weight and that I WANTED to lose weight was a huge, huge triumph for me. You're asking me what effect it WOULD have had on my determination not recognizing that I actually DID have that attitude, and it's the only thing that made me begin to lose. It GAVE ME the motivation. Congratulating every step. It's how I work, through self-love, and slow steady determination. Once I made the account I didn't have to then "GET TO WORK!" because I already had gotten to work.
  • SeanNJ
    SeanNJ Posts: 153 Member
    Granted, this doesn't apply to everybody, so @SeanNJ may have had a different experience. Can't expect everyone to feel the same.

    I'd say this probably sums it up best, and I'll make one more attempt to clarify so that I can cease hijacking the thread.

    ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC4273613/

    It's long, and I don't expect you to read the whole thing, but basically it describes different responses to both positive and negative stimuli. In this case, the stimuli would be the positive or negative reinforcement. From my personal experience (which makes me a bit of a hypocrite since I generally despise using personal anecdotes as a basis for argument), I find that positive feedback to merely suggesting a proposed course of action can be counterproductive to actually undertaking it. To reference my previous piano example, if I were to mention to a friend that I would like to learn to play the piano and that friend responded with effusive praise for my future keyboard prowess, then that interaction can produce a dopamine rush similar to the actual accomplishment of learning to play without doing anything. In more general terms, you can equate it to the "drama king/queen" who may genuinely believe they want to accomplish something, but upon further retrospection, it's apparent that the attention they received for proposing it was sufficient to satiate their need.

    I've heard it said, and I wish I could remember where because I'd credit it properly, that the best way for some people to follow through on something is to not tell anyone what they're doing. While some would consider the public pronouncement of a goal a means of providing motivation or accountability, others use it simply as confirmation that their idea was a good one and the implementation becomes an afterthought. I am prone to the latter, hence why I try to temper the amount of positive reinforcement I provide to others when the "accomplishment" is incidental to the actual goal.

    Anyway, hope that explains it a little better.
  • tns56364
    tns56364 Posts: 43 Member
    Don't forget to love yourself while you're getting to the weight you want to be.

    Big +1
  • lohlgren
    lohlgren Posts: 34 Member
    missyfitz1 wrote: »
    Don't weight everyday


    This actually doesn't work for me. I weigh myself every day to see the tiny up and down fluctuations that can happen. As long as I don't obsess about daily changes in my weight, weighing myself daily is actually helpful. Doing it once a week I find I put too much pressure on that number, whereas if I do it daily and it's just data, it's helpful but I don't freak out about it.

    THIS is my lesson of the month. It's just data.
  • jennifer_417
    jennifer_417 Posts: 12,344 Member
    Don't make it any harder than necessary!
  • seska422 wrote: »
    Don't be impatient. You didn't gain the weight overnight and you won't lose it overnight either.
    This!

    And don't believe that something won't work just because it didn't for some people. It's different for everyone.
This discussion has been closed.