Someone is stealing my lunch at work.

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  • MelodyandBarbells
    MelodyandBarbells Posts: 7,725 Member
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    At least you know up front that you work with a lazy *kitten*
  • vegmebuff
    vegmebuff Posts: 31,389 Member
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    vegmebuff wrote: »
    As much as I love the laxative idea it's dangerous. Do strange flavours instead because that protects you.

    Ah, this sounds even more fun! For condiments in a savory sandwich: sugar icing, jam, marshmallow fluff. If you're industrious roll out marzipan really thin and replace the cheese. For PB&J mix into peanut butter: sweet pickle relish, yogurt, tuna, guacamole, etc. Everything can use a liberal dash of soy sauce. And of course, finish the entire thing by sprinkling salt all over your cutting board and press both sides of the sandwich into it. Delicious.

    Yes! So much fun=) Lots of Cayenne pepper? Garlic/onion salt? Anchovies? Capers? Molasses? Baking extracts like Star Anise - peppermint - lemon. Cloves? Pickling Spice? Peppercorns? Tumeric? and yes...salt is so easy!
    So many things to mix right into that perfect sandwich!

    Great ideas! Imagine a tuna salad sandwich made with anchovies, molasses and peppermint extract! Plus a tablespoon of salt. I'm getting hungry just thinking about it. :D

    so yum
  • lesleyloo7879
    lesleyloo7879 Posts: 439 Member
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    csillers13 wrote: »
    "I don't know who you are. I don't know what you want. If you are looking for ransom I can tell you I don't have money, but what I do have are a very particular set of skills. Skills I have acquired over a very long career. Skills that make me a nightmare for people like you. If you let my sandwich go now that'll be the end of it. I will not look for you, I will not pursue you, but if you don't, I will look for you, I will find you and I will kill you."

    THIS lol
  • ZombieMomTreks
    ZombieMomTreks Posts: 10 Member
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    Pack a lunch in a bag with an ice pack and keep it at your desk. Had someone steal my lunch from panera's once. I was so mad!
  • brigg9
    brigg9 Posts: 104 Member
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    zdyb23456 wrote: »
    I pack a thermal lunch bag with an ice pack and keep it at my desk. Not that I'm worried about anyone stealing my lunch, but because our work fridge is disgusting.

    This. So much this.
  • MelodyandBarbells
    MelodyandBarbells Posts: 7,725 Member
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    Does lunch really go bad in 3/4 hours? When I pack a lunch which could be anything, I just use a generic lunch bag that doesn't offer any cooling or other preservation
  • ClubSilencio
    ClubSilencio Posts: 2,983 Member
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    I can't believe some of these suggestions! I was looking for diplomatic solutions. People are SICK!
  • sabrina_dolce
    sabrina_dolce Posts: 968 Member
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    I can't believe some of these suggestions! I was looking for diplomatic solutions. People are SICK!

    Lol I know right! Doesn't your place of work have a camera that you could ask security to catch the culprit in the act ?!
  • SarcasmIsMyLoveLanguage
    SarcasmIsMyLoveLanguage Posts: 2,671 Member
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    I love the laxative idea but you could get in big trouble for it.
    When I've had this problem in the past, I left a note saying "I licked this. If you still want to steal it, enjoy". Never had a problem again.
  • Rachel0778
    Rachel0778 Posts: 1,701 Member
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    I can't believe some of these suggestions! I was looking for diplomatic solutions. People are SICK!

    I'm not very diplomatic when I'm hungry. I've luckily never had my food stolen (according to my officemates I eat "weird" foods- i.e. my healthy homemade leftovers) but if it did happen the next day would be a spicy pepper surprise meal for sure. Hangry me is all about revenge.
  • chunky_pinup
    chunky_pinup Posts: 758 Member
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    I think laxatives are entirely justifiable....everyone's saying you can get in trouble, but how is that worse than theft?! For all HR knows, you have laxatives in your sandwich for your own health reasons, and if they get sick, it's their fault for stealing in the first place!
  • ClubSilencio
    ClubSilencio Posts: 2,983 Member
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    I think laxatives are entirely justifiable....everyone's saying you can get in trouble, but how is that worse than theft?! For all HR knows, you have laxatives in your sandwich for your own health reasons, and if they get sick, it's their fault for stealing in the first place!

    WHAT???

    LMAOOOOOOO

  • SarcasmIsMyLoveLanguage
    SarcasmIsMyLoveLanguage Posts: 2,671 Member
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    I think laxatives are entirely justifiable....everyone's saying you can get in trouble, but how is that worse than theft?! For all HR knows, you have laxatives in your sandwich for your own health reasons, and if they get sick, it's their fault for stealing in the first place!

    There have been cases of people being prosecuted for doing this. As awesome as it would be, not worth the risk IMO
  • chunky_pinup
    chunky_pinup Posts: 758 Member
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    I think laxatives are entirely justifiable....everyone's saying you can get in trouble, but how is that worse than theft?! For all HR knows, you have laxatives in your sandwich for your own health reasons, and if they get sick, it's their fault for stealing in the first place!

    WHAT???

    LMAOOOOOOO

    Dude, if I was about to go down for giving my thief of a co-worker a case of the sludge drips, I'd totally say that I had them in my sandwich for a health-related reason, and that they wouldn't have gotten sick if they hadn't stolen my food! I'd totally tell them that I was like, super constipated but couldn't take a pill, so I'd mixed it into my lunch to make it easier, lol. HR doesn't want to hear about your bowels, I'm sure...
  • TheProudDadLife
    TheProudDadLife Posts: 654 Member
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    wizzybeth wrote: »
    Make a catfood sandwich and lay it as bait

    THIS
  • TheProudDadLife
    TheProudDadLife Posts: 654 Member
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    Food theft is punishable by firing. I think you need to let your H.R. dept in on it. If it happens to you, it happens to others. Most companies don't take kindly to theft. Theft of a coworker is where the small thieves start and move up to say electronics & bigger items.
    I used to use a big fat felt black and red marker pen to mark my lunch bag + the baggies...it would smear all over my hands if I didn't open it just so....

    Someone used to heist my cupcakes until I started baking special treats with ghost pepper....kinda just sneaks up on ya, biting into a tasty luscious treat piled high with icing, only to WHAM have that heat hit the tastebuds & by then the throat! >:)

    Well played
  • TheProudDadLife
    TheProudDadLife Posts: 654 Member
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    Make a catfood sandwich and lay it as bait

    Hahaha @Alatariel75 perfect!

    I once left a terse note inside a tub of butter I had at work that people kept helping themselves to. I put a sneaky tamper seal on it. A week later I checked and the tub hadn't been tampered with - turns out I was just eating alllllll that butter myself hahaha oops.


    Lol'

  • Scamd83
    Scamd83 Posts: 808 Member
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    So today I went in the cafeteria.... I work on the 1st floor in a fairly large building and we have 2 refrigerators in there. But when I grabbed my lunch I noticed it felt light. The sandwich was missing.

    Lately I've been packing my lunch in a small Macy's bag.... you know the ones they give you for luxury items like watches and perfumes.... yeah those. Cute little handles too.

    So I looked in my bag and just the sandwich was missing. They left my juice and Sun Chips. I'm thinking whoever took it knew what they were doing.

    What should I do?

    I don't think I can walk into HR like a frickin' dork and be like.... "Uhhmm.. hi.... I think someone is stealing my sss-sandwich."

    Nah. I gotta keep this in-house, bro.

    Funny thing is I don't think the culprit realizes just WHO brought that lunch bag in. They really don't. :neutral:



    Easy, make your sandwich with rotten food/under cooked meat and whoever suddenly has to rush to the toilet in agonising pain is your culprit.
  • Cameron_1969
    Cameron_1969 Posts: 2,857 Member
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    At my office my cheese snacks kept disappearing. . So after many unsuccessful attempts to dissuade the "Cheeseburgler" from pilfering my cheddar, we set up a motion activated webcam. He was caught!. . so we made a little cheeseburgler video, including a star-wars style introductory crawl which we showed to our Boss. . He found it hilarious but suggested that we destroy it and told us that this meeting never happened. . Suffice it to say, the culprit never stole from the fridge again and ended up quitting a month later.