People who say, "I'm well" in response to, "How are you?"
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Luckily, we'll probably never run into each other and you'll never ask me how I am doing. Knowing I am going to get a lecture will cause me to ignore you.3
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midwesterner85 wrote: »SarcasmIsMyLoveLanguage wrote: »midwesterner85 wrote: »midwesterner85 wrote: »SarcasmIsMyLoveLanguage wrote: »midwesterner85 wrote: »SarcasmIsMyLoveLanguage wrote: »midwesterner85 wrote: »xXxWhitneyxXx wrote: »ClubSilencio wrote: »You ever ask someone, "How are you?" and they just walk right by you and you're like, "Welp."
I hate those kinds of people.
And if you open a door for someone and they don't at least smile at you ... drives me bananas.
I just very loudly say "YOU'RE WELCOME."
You assume that it is wanted and appreciated to hold a door for someone. Personally, I don't like it when people hold a door open for me. If you ever see me and have an option to hold a door open for me, please don't.
However, I don't correct people who hold doors for me because they just get uppity and argue with me.
Out of curiosity, why don't you like it? I've always been taught it's common courtesy.
Several reasons... here are a few:
1. It usually slows me down because people get in the way trying to hold open the door by sticking around at the door for too long. I want to keep moving.
2. Some people hold doors for no other reason than to pat themselves on the back and tell themselves they are "good people." Sometimes I think people use it as an excuse to ignore things that are bad for society, or at best to tell themselves how awesome they are.
3. Depending upon the situation, it can be a security risk.
4. They expect me to be grateful for doing something I didn't ask them to do nor want them to do.
I.....really? Glad I asked. I guess.
I never realized how bothersome courtesy can be for some people lol!
It's a matter of perspective. You see it as a courtesy and I see it as a bother and a risk. It may be hard for you to understand this: We do not all have the same opinions and perspectives. Yours isn't "right," it is just different than mine. Mine isn't "right" or "wrong" either, but it is my viewpoint.
So - It's a "bother" to show appreciation to a stranger extending a small kindness to you. Okay. It's an interesting viewpoint but one that I can't understand, myself.
The "risk" I don't quite buy but whatever.
We agree to disagree.
No, you still don't understand. It is not a "small kindness." It is not a "kindness" at all. The act of holding a door open for me is a bother. I am not going to reward behavior that bothers me.
Has anyone ever told you that the 'golden rule' really should be "Do to others as they would like to have done to them" because not everyone is the same? Here is an example of that.
Please elaborate on the security risk thing. Unless you work at a CIA building or something? in which case, I understand you can't admit it...
We all have differing opinions, yes, however when 99% of the western world would consider this a courtesy, surely you understand that your opinion might be considered odd?
I don't work at the CIA, but I do work at a facility with controlled access, for reasons beyond personal safety.SarcasmIsMyLoveLanguage wrote: »midwesterner85 wrote: »midwesterner85 wrote: »SarcasmIsMyLoveLanguage wrote: »midwesterner85 wrote: »SarcasmIsMyLoveLanguage wrote: »midwesterner85 wrote: »xXxWhitneyxXx wrote: »ClubSilencio wrote: »You ever ask someone, "How are you?" and they just walk right by you and you're like, "Welp."
I hate those kinds of people.
And if you open a door for someone and they don't at least smile at you ... drives me bananas.
I just very loudly say "YOU'RE WELCOME."
You assume that it is wanted and appreciated to hold a door for someone. Personally, I don't like it when people hold a door open for me. If you ever see me and have an option to hold a door open for me, please don't.
However, I don't correct people who hold doors for me because they just get uppity and argue with me.
Out of curiosity, why don't you like it? I've always been taught it's common courtesy.
Several reasons... here are a few:
1. It usually slows me down because people get in the way trying to hold open the door by sticking around at the door for too long. I want to keep moving.
2. Some people hold doors for no other reason than to pat themselves on the back and tell themselves they are "good people." Sometimes I think people use it as an excuse to ignore things that are bad for society, or at best to tell themselves how awesome they are.
3. Depending upon the situation, it can be a security risk.
4. They expect me to be grateful for doing something I didn't ask them to do nor want them to do.
I.....really? Glad I asked. I guess.
I never realized how bothersome courtesy can be for some people lol!
It's a matter of perspective. You see it as a courtesy and I see it as a bother and a risk. It may be hard for you to understand this: We do not all have the same opinions and perspectives. Yours isn't "right," it is just different than mine. Mine isn't "right" or "wrong" either, but it is my viewpoint.
So - It's a "bother" to show appreciation to a stranger extending a small kindness to you. Okay. It's an interesting viewpoint but one that I can't understand, myself.
The "risk" I don't quite buy but whatever.
We agree to disagree.
No, you still don't understand. It is not a "small kindness." It is not a "kindness" at all. The act of holding a door open for me is a bother. I am not going to reward behavior that bothers me.
Has anyone ever told you that the 'golden rule' really should be "Do to others as they would like to have done to them" because not everyone is the same? Here is an example of that.
Please elaborate on the security risk thing. Unless you work at a CIA building or something? in which case, I understand you can't admit it...
We all have differing opinions, yes, however when 99% of the western world would consider this a courtesy, surely you understand that your opinion might be considered odd?
Actually I think I do understand. Some people lack the ability to understand social cues and just can't do the "social dance" that the rest of us can do. A friend of mine who is on the autism spectrum is very much like this. He's very high functioning and thinks small social talk is "stupid" and will talk forever on subjects that he is interested in, totally missing the obvious fact that everyone around him is bored. He's like the car on the highway doing the speed limit because it's the rules, all the while drivers around him getting ticked off because he's throwing off the highway groove.
I'm not saying you're totally like this, but I get it. It's hard for some people to acknowledge others, and to BE acknowledged BY others. They would rather stay in their world, doing their own thing all the time, never being bothered by anyone.
Whatever makes you happy you know?
That is actually a pretty good description of me. I always say my ideal place to live would be a remote location where I wouldn't see another person for decades. Every once in awhile, you hear about someone being "discovered" by a wandering explorer living somewhere so remote that nobody knew they were there. In an episode of Ultimate Survival: Alaska, one of the groups came upon a cabin in the middle of nowhere with a resident that hadn't seen another person in 3 decades. There are times I would like to live my life that way. Unfortunately, I have a chronic medical condition and will die after only a few days without medication. So that will never happen.
I was going to "like" this, but I didn't want you to think I was liking the bolded part
Thanks for this response, it makes so much more sense now. Just don't yell at me if I hold the door open for you, kay?1 -
denversillygoose wrote: »wolverine66 wrote: »denversillygoose wrote: »Malenurse51 wrote: »To add, to hear someone say; "What do you got", of "What ya' got" is like fingers on a blackboard to me. Every television show I watch seems to use that phrase to great excess. What happened to "have"?
This hurts as much as when people say "where is it at?" or "i should of". I see language as the most important part of a first impression.
Although it sounds like "i should of," they are saying "I should have..."
Nope. They are saying should of. I always give the benefit of the doubt if someone is speaking, but I see this typed way too much.
i don't think I realized you meant in typed form.0 -
Im doing well is correct except im tired right now so...0
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I usually just say "I'm peachy" or something along those lines.
Also, I hold doors for people, but I don't expect a thank you.0 -
"I'm Perfect." Learned that one years ago. Of course "perfect" is a sliding scale but it works for me.0
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^^And it sure is a lot of hard work being perfect ! People just don't understand the dedication necessary
for perfection.0 -
I like to say "So far, so good."
And I'm a door-holder too: in fact, there's always a slew of them leaving the subway, everyone making sure the door is open for the next person, and everyone giving a smile or a nod, happy to have a little courtesy after a long workday and a crowded commute.1 -
I hold the door for people, but in a super beetchy way, so they won't feel obligated to thank me and will get the kitten out of my way asap.
I've got places to be. Also am soooper in tune to how my well-intentioned, polite behavior might annoy kittenholes.
You're welcome.0 -
midwesterner85 wrote: »SarcasmIsMyLoveLanguage wrote: »midwesterner85 wrote: »xXxWhitneyxXx wrote: »ClubSilencio wrote: »You ever ask someone, "How are you?" and they just walk right by you and you're like, "Welp."
I hate those kinds of people.
And if you open a door for someone and they don't at least smile at you ... drives me bananas.
I just very loudly say "YOU'RE WELCOME."
You assume that it is wanted and appreciated to hold a door for someone. Personally, I don't like it when people hold a door open for me. If you ever see me and have an option to hold a door open for me, please don't.
However, I don't correct people who hold doors for me because they just get uppity and argue with me.
Out of curiosity, why don't you like it? I've always been taught it's common courtesy.
Several reasons... here are a few:
1. It usually slows me down because people get in the way trying to hold open the door by sticking around at the door for too long. I want to keep moving.
2. Some people hold doors for no other reason than to pat themselves on the back and tell themselves they are "good people." Sometimes I think people use it as an excuse to ignore things that are bad for society, or at best to tell themselves how awesome they are.
3. Depending upon the situation, it can be a security risk.
4. They expect me to be grateful for doing something I didn't ask them to do nor want them to do.
. . bet you're fun at parties!1 -
I don't understand how people actually get through life when they are so easily butt hurt...about nothing.2
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I always say "I'm good, how are you?" lol0
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Gramar and Speling is over rated0
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I am well and good, thank you.0
This discussion has been closed.
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