Any good jokes?
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My friend asked me, "Why are you getting a divorce?" I responded, "My wife wasn't home the entire night and in the morning she said she spent the night at her sister's house." He said, "So?" And I responded, "She's lying. I spent the night at her sister's house!"
Hahahaha have a great day YOUR WELCOME1 -
I bought shoes from a drug dealer. I don't know what he laced them with but I've been tripping all day.3
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Do you know what my grandpa said before you kick the can?
I wonder how far I can kick this can1 -
5150nick562 wrote: »I bought shoes from a drug dealer. I don't know what he laced them with but I've been tripping all day.
Oh my gahd nick im rollin hahaha thank you1 -
Did you hear about the corduroy pillows?
It really made headlines!2 -
_A_Real_Mouthful wrote: »A gorilla walks into a bar and orders a banana martini.
The bartender thinks this is a little peculiar but quickly becomes aware he is actually just dreaming.
He wakes shortly after and begins to tell his wife about the ridiculous dream he just had.
His wife ignores him.
The man rolls over and begins to sob because he realizes his marriage is in shambles.
I really like jokes. I'm a great person to tell jokes to because I usually cannot remember a punchline. I get the punchline, but I just forget it. I can hear a joke more than once and sincerely laugh all over again.
But I don't get this. I even checked out the urban dictionaty to see if all ya'll smart *kitten* youngsters had changed the meaning of shambles. Is there an actual joke here? If so would someone explain it to me.0 -
How do you make a girl's toes curl when you "make love" to her?
Keep her pantyhose on!0 -
What did the one ocean say to the other ocean???
Nothing, they just waved2 -
My life0
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_A_Real_Mouthful wrote: »_A_Real_Mouthful wrote: »A gorilla walks into a bar and orders a banana martini.
The bartender thinks this is a little peculiar but quickly becomes aware he is actually just dreaming.
He wakes shortly after and begins to tell his wife about the ridiculous dream he just had.
His wife ignores him.
The man rolls over and begins to sob because he realizes his marriage is in shambles.
I really like jokes. I'm a great person to tell jokes to because I usually cannot remember a punchline. I get the punchline, but I just forget it. I can hear a joke more than once and sincerely laugh all over again.
But I don't get this. I even checked out the urban dictionaty to see if all ya'll smart *kitten* youngsters had changed the meaning of shambles. Is there an actual joke here? If so would someone explain it to me.
its an "anti-joke" (my personal favorite)- you basically start it off like any other and then bomb the punchline, usually with something depressing or sad.
https://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=Anti-Joke
Speaking of sad: I hate this had to be explained. It takes so much away from the beauty of it.0 -
A vegan surfer walks into a health food store. The employee behind the counter says "Oh hey dude! We just got in a new protein powder that's totally all pea protein." And the surfer says "Sweet! No whey man!"2
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Mattkbowman wrote: »A vegan surfer walks into a health food store. The employee behind the counter says "Oh hey dude! We just got in a new protein powder that's totally all pea protein." And the surfer says "Sweet! No whey man!"
Nice!!!0 -
Why is Santa Claus so jolly?
Because he knows where all the naughty girls live
Hahaha I hohohope yall like it !0 -
Q. What did the elephant say to the naked man?
A. "How do you breathe through something so small?"1 -
Q: what did the mama bucket say to the baby buck=t when it was sick?
A: you look alittle pale ?1 -
Whats the odd one out?
A Washing Machine
B Toaster
C Woman
D Freezer
B Toaster - It's the only one that doesn't drip when it's f*cked
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