Dealing with people that don't get it.
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That's awesome. Most people don't care but there is a select few people in every group environment that have something condescending to say. "What do you call that sludge today" "what's the name of that diet you do" "oh....you are one of THOSE people".The middle finger works well.
"Why do you care what I eat?" or "Why is what I'm eating such a big deal for you?"
If you can, ignore them. My MIL is very commentating on what I'm cooking because she's the sort of person who has to talk 24/7/365. It's her way of controlling in a passive manner so when I do tell her to shut up, she can act righteously offended.
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That's awesome. Most people don't care but there is a select few people in every group environment that have something condescending to say. "What do you call that sludge today" "what's the name of that diet you do" "oh....you are one of THOSE people".The middle finger works well.
"Why do you care what I eat?" or "Why is what I'm eating such a big deal for you?"
If you can, ignore them. My MIL is very commentating on what I'm cooking because she's the sort of person who has to talk 24/7/365. It's her way of controlling in a passive manner so when I do tell her to shut up, she can act righteously offended.
I call that sludge lunch, it actually tastes good and is really good for me.
I am not on a diet, I am just trying to eat healthier so I feel better
Yeah, I am one of those people, resistance was futile.
I have had those lines used on me, especially by certain family members. The thing is most of them are so clueless that whatever I say really doesn't matter anyway, they aren't listening. I have stopped really worrying about their comments because I am not going to change their minds and they don't actually care what my answer is. It is ok to have an answer, but your answer is probably as irrelevant as their opinion.4 -
Bullies are the same no matter what they are picking on. The justification n you need is from yourself because got are not doing it for them. They are not living in your anxiety, tight pants shirts that are too short, having a hard time thing your shoes without holding your breath, a bad self image or the realization that you want to do something better for yourself. You do you. Good luck.1
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tell them : Because unlike you, i refuse to help this country descend into a fat epidemic.
If you can't respect me saying no, then i have no respect for you at all.
seriously, stop being a douche and offering me unhealthy food. If you want to be a good person, start bringing in healthy alternatives instead.3 -
And what an epidemic it is my friend.duckforceone wrote: »tell them : Because unlike you, i refuse to help this country descend into a fat epidemic.
If you can't respect me saying no, then i have no respect for you at all.
seriously, stop being a douche and offering me unhealthy food. If you want to be a good person, start bringing in healthy alternatives instead.
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If they don't get it, they never will.
It is usually a self defense mechanism where they belittle your change so they don't have to look at themselves and do something similar for their health.
You'll just need to fight back or learn to ignore them.
I have some catty friends that make comments. But they do so in a fun Golden Girls sort of way and know I have my goals and desires so its all fun and games there.
THIS!0 -
Personally I have no problem responding with "wow, that says a lot more about you than it does me.". The reaction is typically stunned silence. That gives them a lot to think about--usually none of it good--but at a complete loss for words.4
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I just smile and say I love donuts, too. A little too well.
Taking everything personally may makes me miserable. I figure most people mean well, and don't assign negative motives whatever possible. I've discovered that my reactions can set the tone of many encounters.16 -
Does anyone have a sarcastic response for people in their lives that have stupid things to say because of your lifestyle change? All of a sudden I'm apparently a prude because I pass on the donuts at work, bring my own lunch when work orders pizza, pass on the alcoholic beverages etc..
I'm not against any of these things but I want to choose how I get my calories in and plan accordingly. I don't want to eat free donuts an hour after I had my protein filled breakfast because *gasp* I'm not hungry!!!
Just having a heightened awareness of ALL the food around me (it's a lot) and changing my mindset has helped me out. I'm losing weight in a way that benefits my overall health for the long term.
Do people just not get it? Will the eyerolls stop?
Just don't eat the foods? Seriously. I wouldn't worry what others think. At my job we have family members bringing in donuts and cake and such every day and people eat off of it throughout the day. I just choose not to. Like you, I'm usually not hungry anyway. If I have the calories left for the day then I might eat a little of something but I just don't really care for the sugary stuff anyway.2 -
My boyfriend is generally supportive but he does like to make the odd comment here or there and I can tell he finds it exasperating when I either make dinner before i go see him or fuss over weighing stuff when he cooks.
I know when I went for cocktails recently for a friends birthday I asked for diet lemonade in my cocktail instead of full fat and got a bunch of eye rolls. This super annoyed me because I was really pushing the boat out calorie wise going for cocktails so I wasnt going to waste calories.3 -
You don't owe them anything. Carry on.4
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I just say.." I packed a lunch today..." Or thank you for asking.3
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you dont have to say a word. they will soon get fed up1
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Part of it is the amount of time you've been at it, after months of losing weight I started getting more questions and less food pushing, after 1 1/2 years they just don't even offer, they know i'm doing my thing and it's not just a fad or faze i'm going through.2
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You don't owe anyone an explanation. That being said, if someone is being persistent, rude or snarky to you sometimes a snappy comeback will work but a "dr"s orders" will shut them up without further explanation.2
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This is very true, the longer you stick with it, the more it just becomes your accepted behaviour. It was my birthday yesterday and, as per office tradition, I brought in a few mini cookies and mini brownie bites for everyone else to enjoy today. I'm not going to behave like a food nazi, and dictate what everyone else eats, I'm just not going to have any of them myself. After all, I had a piece of chocolate sponge cake yesterday, enjoyed it immensely and fit it in my calorie count for the day. Without judging, perhaps there are people in the office who can also fit in a little square of brownie into their normal eating. I could bring in the fruit platter that I would happily consider a treat, but it would simply annoy the people who don't want their food intake policed. By being considerate towards others and keeping up the normal traditions, I think it goes quite some way to them understanding that my personal food intake isn't going to impact on them!sashayoung72 wrote: »Part of it is the amount of time you've been at it, after months of losing weight I started getting more questions and less food pushing, after 1 1/2 years they just don't even offer, they know i'm doing my thing and it's not just a fad or faze i'm going through.
The unwanted comments, I've had them in the past, but it really is best to ignore them entirely, and not even engage in discussions or (mildly) snarky comments back, even if you desperately want to. I rather suspect those people are looking to get a reaction from you, so don't give them the satisfaction!9 -
duckforceone wrote: »tell them : Because unlike you, i refuse to help this country descend into a fat epidemic.
If you can't respect me saying no, then i have no respect for you at all.
seriously, stop being a douche and offering me unhealthy food. If you want to be a good person, start bringing in healthy alternatives instead.
Well OP said he wasn't sanctimonious so these replies wouldn't work for a non sanctimonious person, nor would they stop niggling or comments or eye rolling.
I would roll my eyes at anyone saying such 'on your high horse' comments too.
I am firmly with the others who say respond with a friendly No thanks, or I might have some later or I've brought my lunch from home or something equally short and mild.
That has always worked for me, along with occaisonally haveing a small amount of something or talking it home to ' have later' ( may or may not actually take any or eat it at home if I do)
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I hear you OP, it's very frustrating. Seriously there's a friend I don't even really want to visit again because she's always pushing food on me when I go! But yeah, all you can do is just say no and try not to be around those people too much when there is food there. I get very annoyed when someone tries to push food on me that I don't even want (if I do, I make room for it anyway!).
Usually I say that I'm just not hungry. Or if they annoy me I tell them that I had a donut yesterday already so I'm trying to be good today (bonus is that it's a passive aggressive criticism of their eating habits too, so maybe they'll leave you alone next time). Or that I didn't want to spike my blood sugar (which is the truth sometimes).1 -
I am known for my host of food allergies and have a couple of coworkers who know where my epipens are stashed. Usually, when I say "No, thank you." I get at least one, "Oh, yeah, she can't eat anything good."
On one hand, I am the office weirdo, on the other, they don't give me a hard time.2 -
I lie.
Someone comes by and says "hey there are donuts in admin" and I'll reply enthusiastically "Wow that's awesome, I'll grab one in a minute!" ...and that minute never arrives.14
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