First Dates: The Good, the Bad & the Ugly
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this is making me kind of glad my dating days were pre-internet...1
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I met this other guy from PoF a few years ago. We agreed to meet at a local mall (big big mall) for dinner and a movie. If I recall correctly we were meeting by the mall Ferris Wheel. Anyway - I get there and he shows up and he's really short and sweaty and there was something creepy about him.
So we decide to go to this chain restaurant in the mall ...and there was an hour wait for a table so we get one of those beeper thingys they give you and decide to go over to Barnes & Noble and wait for our beeper thing to go off. So we each get a bottle of water (from a vending machine - I had to buy his because he had no cash on him). So we're sitting at a table and he says "it's very dark in here" and I'm like "ummm it's still day light and it's really bright in here..." and he was like "no - I mean all the blacks" And I'm like "what?" he's like "we're the only white people in here..." Like, really?
So we go over to the restaurant and I'm already wanting to ditch him but decide that since it was a Saturday night and I had nothing to do that I'd try and see this date through to the bitter end.
We get a table and order food and he continues to charm me with his racist comments, and how he lives with his parents (never married, no kids and he was 48 years old) and he was just awful. He tells me he doesn't drink so to annoy him I had 2 vodka cranberries
I wanted to ditch him after I excused myself to the ladies room, but when I got out he was standing there, waiting for me
He had already purchased the tickets to Iron Man 2 so I was kinda stuck for a few more hours. he kept trying to touch me...like on my *kitten* and lower back. It was gross.
So we go into the theater and he continues to try and grope me and I'm trying to be polite but still brushing him off. Finally he gets up and says "I can tell you don't like me so I'm leaving." and he gets up and leaves me there in the theater LMAO
I wait a few minutes (maybe 15) because I was afraid of running into him - and then I left. By that time it was close to midnight and the parking lot of the mall was nearly empty, and to be honest I was a little creeped out by myself....but I get to my car, get home and then he texts me at around 1am and says "why didn't you like me?"1 -
tcunbeliever wrote: »this is making me kind of glad my dating days were pre-internet...
For real!! LOL0 -
this thread makes me even more reluctant to really put myself out there and date again
yikes2 -
Cutaway_Collar wrote: »This is so bad. Are guys like Mr. Darcy unavailable nowadays or is that a non-existent breed?!
My wife and I were watching Bridget Jones diary and she said that guy is someone every woman wants.
I never got the Mr. Darcy love...and I've read Pride & Prejudice (ok & Zombies, but still...)
Although Colin Firth...yeah I have big love for him!
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Darcy from Pride and Prejudice? <vomit>
It's a better story with zombies, you can spend at least part of the movie hoping some of the jerks will get killed, but in the end it's just as terrible as the original.1 -
I'll add a story from my brief stint as a cougar.
Before I met the current spouse, I had gotten divorced from my lovely ex, who cheated on me for 8 out of the 10 years we were married. He's on wife #6 now, just fyi. After we split, I dated around just to have fun. I was working 2 jobs so I didn't have the time to be in a relationship, but it was fun to meet different people. One night, I was out with 2 friends from work and we were going to play pool. We needed a 4th person so I told Sharon to pick someone and I'd go ask him to play. Sharon was single, but shy, so I thought I could find a guy to hook her up with. She finally pointed out this one guy, I asked him to play and he accepted.
Over the course of a few games, I found out that he was 21. Sharon was late 20s, I think, and I was 38. It turned out that he liked me so he kept talking to me, etc. He asked me out so I suggested we grab coffee at the local bookstore the next day.
The first bad sign was when we arrived at Barnes and Noble and he said he'd never been there. Then we went in to the Starbucks and I ordered coffee. He got a Dr. Pepper. That was the second bad sign to me.
After we got our drinks, we walked around. He actually asked me for a tour. I admit, I used to spend a lot of time in book stores so I could give a tour but that's not really the kind of thing you do, is it? I tried so hard to find some topic we could talk about. I have a variety of interests, so I figured that surely, there had to be SOME common ground. All he really wanted to talk about was football.
I was relieved when we went our separate ways.3 -
tcunbeliever wrote: »this is making me kind of glad my dating days were pre-internet...
What? Decent guys are out there. I don't even send dick pics until the 3rd date.
No, I've read and heard some horror stories about online dating from women. Yeesh.
I've been told I'm a perfectly fine date from online dating. I just have a face made for radio...and a voice for newspaper.3 -
The ugly: My date took me back to his place, and everything was going really well. Then he shoved himself down my throat and came, and I puked all over him.
I was mortified! I kept apologizing and expected him to be mad, but he was just shocked then was like it's ok it happens. I haven't seen him since!
Wait...by everything going well do you mean this was at the end of something consensual?
Yes, til he did that!
Oh good. Well, until that. 0 -
For those who are lamenting there are no nice guys, I've been with one I found online seven years ago and he's great. I met him on Yahoo personals FWIW.
Prior to that I DID have a couple of those PoF experiences. What is it with this PoF trend? The strangest won me a year subscription to geek2geek's personals site years ago! We opted to meet at the Newseum. Yes, a museum about news. When we went it was pretty obscure and boring, but it's come a long way if you're ever in DC.
Anyway, I show up in shorts and a tank and he is dressed to go door to door as a Jehovah Witness (no offense to Jehovah Witnesses, just painting a picture). Additionally, he was wearing velcro elbow pads. Since he didn't explain them I didn't ask. It wouldn't have been so bad but he kept opening the velcro... in a quiet museum.... sccccrrrriiiitttcch. A security guard finally walked up to us asking "Man, I've GOT to know, what ARE those for?" Apparently it was tennis elbow but I had to wonder if it wasn't late night porn elbow. Juxtaposed to the velcro sounds, he also liked to quietly walk around exhibits and end up standing behind me. I jumped a couple times and he'd laugh saying his friends thought he should wear a bell sometimes.
I think the worst thing, and guys reading this for tips from women, this is a good one. Don't ever laugh at your own jokes UNLESS everyone is laughing genuinely and / or hysterically. He made some comment about the mortality of my DD based on her name (a comment that offended me, surprise surprise) and guffawed so loud at his comic genius that everyone in the gift shop stopped and turned.
At this point I decided he must be doing these things so I won't want to go out with him again, wrongo. He still wanted to get something to eat and suggested Subway, where he chugged his bag of chips like a drink. He wanted to do something else after that but I explained that my brother expected me back at a certain time on these first dates for safety reasons. (Lame excuse)
Afterward, I was shocked to get an email asking for another date. I tried to think of the kindest way to say no and after all that I foolishly thought maybe the height difference would be not too hurtful - my issue, not his. But what I got in response was a five page dissertation on the fallacy of the hunter-gatherer logic of height preferences from women. Ugh. So I replied, there wasn't any chemistry and THAT was the valuable lesson from that date.1 -
saragreen012 wrote: »This one was bad for both parties: When I was in college I went a date with this guy who was the mascot for a baseball team, I was fresh out of a break-up and decided I could use a fun night, even if the guy seemed very young and not so much my type. (I'm not a jerk, I told him about the break-up, and that I dont generally date guys, but he still insisted) So he picks a local bar to meet at, it's a strange place and it becomes VERY obvious he has no idea what to order at a bar. I helped him order his drink, suggest we try the sports bar next door after our first drink (thinking a more relaxed bar would help) and he declines, because it turns out he lied about his age, he is only 19. He also evidently does not usually drink, and cannot hold his alcohol at all, when he went to the restroom these other guys (who had been listening the entire night) bought me a shot and wished me good luck.
All in all I was still for some reason determined to still follow my plan of bad decision making, and invited him back to my place, only I was living with 2 guy friends at the time and they were on the couch when we got home. HE SAT ON THE COUCH WITH THEM FOR OVER AN HOUR. It was so uncomfortable, I was clearly trying to get him into my room, but by the time he went into my room I was completely over it, but now he wanted to spend the night. Being the proper adult that I was, I had my roommate bang on my bedroom door like a jealous boyfriend and scared him straight out the front door. No one got laid that night, but we laughed about that night for years after.
OMFG. What a nightmare! This reminds me of the old joke about first dates 'On a first date, men worry that she won't look like her photo. Women worry that he's a serial killer'.1 -
I met a very nice guy through some family friends. He asked me out to see Spiderman 2. He wore a bowtie and highwater Dockers. He brought his sister. He made one mildly amusing comment at the beginning of the film and repeated it upwards of 20 times during the entire movie. Afterwards, we met up with the family friends AND my dad The guy proceeded to try to force himself into the tiny space next to me on the couch and tried to hold my hand, while his sister kept exclaiming that we made a cute couple. My dad and I are very close, so he saw what was going on and of course did nothing to intervene and just made as much fun of me as possible after we left.
Nice guy but....yikes.2 -
Best thread ever.
I've never been on a date so I really can't add anything unfortunately (or fortunately, apparently).2 -
I'll add a story from my brief stint as a cougar.
Before I met the current spouse, I had gotten divorced from my lovely ex, who cheated on me for 8 out of the 10 years we were married. He's on wife #6 now, just fyi. After we split, I dated around just to have fun. I was working 2 jobs so I didn't have the time to be in a relationship, but it was fun to meet different people. One night, I was out with 2 friends from work and we were going to play pool. We needed a 4th person so I told Sharon to pick someone and I'd go ask him to play. Sharon was single, but shy, so I thought I could find a guy to hook her up with. She finally pointed out this one guy, I asked him to play and he accepted.
Over the course of a few games, I found out that he was 21. Sharon was late 20s, I think, and I was 38. It turned out that he liked me so he kept talking to me, etc. He asked me out so I suggested we grab coffee at the local bookstore the next day.
The first bad sign was when we arrived at Barnes and Noble and he said he'd never been there. Then we went in to the Starbucks and I ordered coffee. He got a Dr. Pepper. That was the second bad sign to me.
After we got our drinks, we walked around. He actually asked me for a tour. I admit, I used to spend a lot of time in book stores so I could give a tour but that's not really the kind of thing you do, is it? I tried so hard to find some topic we could talk about. I have a variety of interests, so I figured that surely, there had to be SOME common ground. All he really wanted to talk about was football.
I was relieved when we went our separate ways.
Congrats on leaving a sociopath!!!0 -
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Newly seperated and you guys are all scaring me. lol1
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AskTracyAnnK28 wrote: »OMG - I saw Spaceballs when I was in high school. I'm dating myself here...
I was long out of high school when Spaceballs came out.1 -
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This thread should be renamed Horror Stories: First Date edition.2
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Cutaway_Collar wrote: »There was a similar thread and I need to find it to repaste my most horrible date ever where the ex boyfriend showed up with his posse and dined with me and the girl.
As for the good, my best date to date was my first date with my wife.
I got my grumpy cat T-shirt in the mail and I took my first ever selfie with it and uploaded it to okcupid. That night I had plenty of visitors because I cropped my thumbnail so it would focus on the cat on my chest. One of them was my wife. I saw her and I was like oh sheeeeet, so tasty!
I messaged her and we chatted for a week. And made plans to meet Sunday. She lived near the Yale bowl farther up CT and i was closer to the NY border, so I drove up. She showed up and she had zero make up on and hair was quickly done and in a band. We had Japanese food and had a nice conversation over lunch.... And she was shy and I was not opening up yet and as I was preparing to leave I told her I was going to scout this new area of CT and then I asked her if she wanted to get coffee in starbucks.....
We were in the line for a while and she was making res pigtail plaids with her hair... And it was my best time in a starbucks line watching that.... we went and sat on the couch and chatted for seven long hours and the store employee kicked us out to close for the day.....
I walked her to the car and gave her a hug. Then I went to Marshall's and I bought a shitload of socks. I buy socks when I am happy. We got back together again and again and fell in love fast and furious.
She later told me she came to the first date with zero make up and hair quickly done because she was at the point of giving up and was come to another of those dud dates.
This is cute because this is basically my first date with my now husband. We knew each other through mutual friends and my ex boyfriend (which we broke up because he had a second life that involved robbing businesses in the dead of night, but that's a story in itself). Well it was a bit after the ex boyfriend and I broke up, and my husband started asking if I wanted to grab coffee (I hate coffee), and I declined once before finally accepting. Showed up pretty disheveled, but we ended up talking until they kicked us out as well at close. We ended up moving to a 24 hour diner to talk until about 2-3am.
A few days later, he asked if I wanted to go to a movie. During our coffee date, he jokingly acknowledged that I looked like a rabbit by the way I was always glancing around and that it was cute. He showed up with a little stuffed rabbit that night. It was cheesy as hell, but it still makes me smile. Now we're are newly married since March.
With that being said, I actually don't have date horror stories. Other than a well known musician, but he was just an *kitten*. My true horror story is the ex boyfriend being a little burglar and me finding out by detectives showing up at my house to look for stolen property because he had been arrested. Real fun time.
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GypsyFire65 wrote: »To make a long story short.
Aaaand a bit of advise.
On a movie date. Don't EVER, EVER, EVER, EVER, think your being smart by bringing this particular so called healthy homemade snack. A sugarfree caramel covered apple. Made with lots and lots of sugarfree caramels. Don't, just don't. And stay away from the sugarfree gummie bears too.
Aren't those the ones that have all those reviews on amazon for giving you really bad gas?3 -
Another time, I was a few mins away from getting to where I was supposed to meet a guy. I call for directions and he tells me how he's had "some dental work done" and most people are fine with it, just wanted to give me a heads up. He turns out looking about 10 years older than his pics, short as me (I'm 5ft3), oh and he had no teeth. None. I guess he wore false teeth but decided those may be too fancy for a first date. He chain smoked the entire time. We ended up getting a burger at the Dairy Queen and I left.
That was my very first online date experience. I don't know why I haven't given up yet. So close to it though.
This is some Stephen King material
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I feel pretty lucky after reading all these. I guess my worst isn't that bad but... I went on mine after my husband ( the only guy I had ever dated ) and I split up.
He told me he hadn't been feeling very good all day but didn't want to cancel because I might think he was just flaking out. I tried to assure him we could reschedule but he insisted we go.
He took me to a fancy Italian place and everything was going great until all of a sudden I'm watching him while he's talking and sweat just starts pouring down his face. He just goes white and a sheet and has to run to the bathroom.
He couldn't drive like that so I took him back to his place. Of course I didn't have the heart to just leave him alone in the fetal position on the bathroom floor so I played nurse Jessica all night.
We stayed friends and He got his pay back last year when I over did it on fireball one night.
You guys have me really scared to go on dates now 1 -
I love this thread!
One night, long, long ago, I had three dates in the same night...dinner first date with a guy from work - good food but boring conversation all about marriage and children (seriously guys not on a first date, not even with a single mom)...blind first date out to shoot pool with a guy from my mother's bowling league - dull but ok, he didn't do anything wrong, he just wasn't interesting...and bedtime date with an old friend...no repeat dates for any of the three...after reading all of these posts it has occurred to me that I might be the horrible date tale of someone else!!!0 -
Another time, I was a few mins away from getting to where I was supposed to meet a guy. I call for directions and he tells me how he's had "some dental work done" and most people are fine with it, just wanted to give me a heads up. He turns out looking about 10 years older than his pics, short as me (I'm 5ft3), oh and he had no teeth. None. I guess he wore false teeth but decided those may be too fancy for a first date. He chain smoked the entire time. We ended up getting a burger at the Dairy Queen and I left.
That was my very first online date experience. I don't know why I haven't given up yet. So close to it though.Another time, I was a few mins away from getting to where I was supposed to meet a guy. I call for directions and he tells me how he's had "some dental work done" and most people are fine with it, just wanted to give me a heads up. He turns out looking about 10 years older than his pics, short as me (I'm 5ft3), oh and he had no teeth. None. I guess he wore false teeth but decided those may be too fancy for a first date. He chain smoked the entire time. We ended up getting a burger at the Dairy Queen and I left.
That was my very first online date experience. I don't know why I haven't given up yet. So close to it though.
I have to ask - how did he eat a burger with no teeth?? That must have been a sight!
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Worst one was probably the "truth speaker" guy. He was wildly into conspiracy theories and spent most of our date trying to convince me that the world was flat. He also had this really weird crazy look in his eyes which was creepy and off putting.
Best one was just last night actually. We met up at a bar like we had planned, hit it off straight away then after a few drinks confessed to each other that we're not really 'bar people' and would rather be sitting outside somewhere. So we bought some chicken wings and beers then sat down at this beautiful, picturesque lighthouse chatting and laughing for a couple of hours.. It was perfect, full moon, clear sky.. we even saw a fox!
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Thisnameischosen_ wrote: »Worst one was probably the "truth speaker" guy. He was wildly into conspiracy theories and spent most of our date trying to convince me that the world was flat. He also had this really weird crazy look in his eyes which was creepy and off putting.
Best one was just last night actually. We met up at a bar like we had planned, hit it off straight away then after a few drinks confessed to each other that we're not really 'bar people' and would rather be sitting outside somewhere. So we bought some chicken wings and beers then sat down at this beautiful, picturesque lighthouse chatting and laughing for a couple of hours.. It was perfect, full moon, clear sky.. we even saw a fox!
That sounds great! Hope it works out!1
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