We broke up because...
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He was always out of limes.0
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She was always out of touch0
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she would never even touch me0
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He was thinking of the wrong girl... Hence why we broke up..0
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She was always breaking promises!0
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Made me do all the cooking0
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Was always cooking up unrealistic money-making schemes0
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she threw a pot of hot grits in my lap
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Has blisters all over his thingie ..
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Wouldn't play nurse.0
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Doesn't have a thingie0
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Ughhh she had these rashes she wanted me to rub ..0
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Was always rubbing me in church0
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Had to pray for forgiveness after every roll in the hay0
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Caught her rolling one too many times0
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I was in a wheelchair ..broken leg and she pushed me down a steep hill0
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she would just roll her eyes when I tried to be romantic0
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Romance to him was a bag of Doritos and Skinemax1
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He had a thing for our pool boy ..
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Denied me the great joys in life0
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She kept going after the pool boy0
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Was in love with the Gardner
Now I know why he was coming to "trim the bushes" so often0 -
The gardener wanted her too but she kept telling him no.0
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No really meant no with her0
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He ..oh its too awful to say0
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He wouldn't voice his opinion about anything0
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she couldn't decide what restaurant she wanted to eat at0
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He didn't want to eat at an actual restaurant0
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