Does your partner having an interest in fitness matter to you?
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Replies
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DeficitDuchess wrote: »I find some of the comments here, to be dishearteningly juvenile because they seem to justify prejudicial as preferential, which is an excuse, not a reason & thus isn't reflective of someone whom touts "No excuses" & having discipline, when they're unable to apply discipline; to their own judgement of others.
1st discipline isn't only learned, in the gym; that's a logical fallacy! I dealt with the hardship of raising babies (myself & my siblings), yet I've never; been to a gym.
2nd no 1 has complete control concerning their fate, just their choices. When I for instance view the current lives of my previous classmates, to mine; there're drastic differences. While we all began life 36 years ago, the same. They look & are the appropriate health for their age. While I naturally look half their age & have developed the health of someone, twice their age. It's unrealistic to expect someone to age at an average speed and/or for their health, to only decline within averages.
There's also a huge difference between health & fitness. While everyone should strive to be as healthy as possible, being fit is elective; as in not a necessity & therefore should never be a requirement!
This woman was once fit enough, to run a half marathon; 4 days before giving birth:
http://abcnews.go.com/Health/Parenting/flesh-eating-bacteria-costs-mom-arms-legs/story?id=10646649
Also what about all of our war veterans that return home maimed, they don't deserve you because they're unable to maintain their fitness; even though they might've once been more fit than you?
It'd be wise to get off that high horse, so that fate's unable; to knock you off of it. Remember tragedy doesn't discriminate, only people do! Building a relationship on a shaky foundation of prejudicial requirements, that no 1 (even you) has a realistic ability to guarantee that they're able to acquire and/or maintain; might collapse if/when 1 of you don't achieve/ can't keep it.
Of course in the case of illness and unforseen circumstances we will stick by our beloved partner. We are just talking about ideal circumstances and what we enjoy in our partnership. I had a severe medical injury last year (and sat in a chair nonfunctional for six months). But, I started in perfect health before that. And I have done everything I can to work on recovery. That's my personal choice. And not everyone even has a choice. It's not like I thought about what boxes my husband checked off before we married. We just worked together because of our compatibility. No need to make arguments where there are none. We are just discussing fitness and lifestyle in a relationship that we enjoy.0 -
It is not a big deal to me if my partner is as interested in fitness as I am, but it is very important to me that she is willing to be active and join me on occasional outdoor adventures. In my current relationship I often will meet up with friends for nature hikes on Saturday mornings, and generally my partner will stay home, but if it's going to be a full day trip she will usually join me. I enjoy the balance or being able to do my own thing, but also being able to spend some time together, without being made to feel guilty. I do feel extra fortunate now too, since we are now running together twice a week (despite my pace being significantly faster, I stay back with her and REALLY enjoy those runs) and we go on bike rides fairly often together. Wasnt a requirement in my mind, but I love it now. Just like I love my solo gym sessions 3-4 days a week.2
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I actually find it really inconvenient to work out with my husband. We like running together, but our lifting styles/schedules are so different that we can't be lifting partners, and if we go to the gym together he ends up waiting on me for 30 minutes because my warm-up takes so frikkin long. It's a lot easier to go and do my own thing.
And honestly, I don't care if he's fit. I just want him happy and healthy, and he gets so much activity in at work (lifting heavy things, walking up and down stairs all day) that he doesn't really need to work out for health. Me hitting up the gym regularly and him doing the activity required by his job keeps us in good enough shape to go hiking together on vacations.1 -
DeficitDuchess wrote: »I find some of the comments here, to be dishearteningly juvenile because they seem to justify prejudicial as preferential, which is an excuse, not a reason & thus isn't reflective of someone whom touts "No excuses" & having discipline, when they're unable to apply discipline; to their own judgement of others.
1st discipline isn't only learned, in the gym; that's a logical fallacy! I dealt with the hardship of raising babies (myself & my siblings), yet I've never; been to a gym.
2nd no 1 has complete control concerning their fate, just their choices. When I for instance view the current lives of my previous classmates, to mine; there're drastic differences. While we all began life 36 years ago, the same. They look & are the appropriate health for their age. While I naturally look half their age & have developed the health of someone, twice their age. It's unrealistic to expect someone to age at an average speed and/or for their health, to only decline within averages.
There's also a huge difference between health & fitness. While everyone should strive to be as healthy as possible, being fit is elective; as in not a necessity & therefore should never be a requirement!
This woman was once fit enough, to run a half marathon; 4 days before giving birth:
http://abcnews.go.com/Health/Parenting/flesh-eating-bacteria-costs-mom-arms-legs/story?id=10646649
Also what about all of our war veterans that return home maimed, they don't deserve you because they're unable to maintain their fitness; even though they might've once been more fit than you?
It'd be wise to get off that high horse, so that fate's unable; to knock you off of it. Remember tragedy doesn't discriminate, only people do! Building a relationship on a shaky foundation of prejudicial requirements, that no 1 (even you) has a realistic ability to guarantee that they're able to acquire and/or maintain; might collapse if/when 1 of you don't achieve/ can't keep it.
...and here's today's example of the Strawman argument.
There will be no joy - only sadness!2 -
DeficitDuchess wrote: »I find some of the comments here, to be dishearteningly juvenile because they seem to justify prejudicial as preferential, which is an excuse, not a reason & thus isn't reflective of someone whom touts "No excuses" & having discipline, when they're unable to apply discipline; to their own judgement of others.
1st discipline isn't only learned, in the gym; that's a logical fallacy! I dealt with the hardship of raising babies (myself & my siblings), yet I've never; been to a gym.
2nd no 1 has complete control concerning their fate, just their choices. When I for instance view the current lives of my previous classmates, to mine; there're drastic differences. While we all began life 36 years ago, the same. They look & are the appropriate health for their age. While I naturally look half their age & have developed the health of someone, twice their age. It's unrealistic to expect someone to age at an average speed and/or for their health, to only decline within averages.
There's also a huge difference between health & fitness. While everyone should strive to be as healthy as possible, being fit is elective; as in not a necessity & therefore should never be a requirement!
This woman was once fit enough, to run a half marathon; 4 days before giving birth:
http://abcnews.go.com/Health/Parenting/flesh-eating-bacteria-costs-mom-arms-legs/story?id=10646649
Also what about all of our war veterans that return home maimed, they don't deserve you because they're unable to maintain their fitness; even though they might've once been more fit than you?
It'd be wise to get off that high horse, so that fate's unable; to knock you off of it. Remember tragedy doesn't discriminate, only people do! Building a relationship on a shaky foundation of prejudicial requirements, that no 1 (even you) has a realistic ability to guarantee that they're able to acquire and/or maintain; might collapse if/when 1 of you don't achieve/ can't keep it.
I'm not sure how wanting a counterpart who holds the same/similar interests as you is being juvenile or on some kind of high horse.3 -
I mean it matters to me if they'll go on hikes/walk the dog/eat vegetables but outside of that I Can work out on my own just as easily1
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Cutaway_Collar wrote: »@DeficitDuchess for the win.
I love @rebel_26 response and @Villae81 who talks of lone time. Smug couples in the gym annoy me. Actually they annoy many others too with all the PDA and gym hall love.
My wife has a fulltime job. She also runs our house and keeps things in order. She has no time to work out and we just go on walks and she watches what she eats. I don't expect her to tag along to the gym so I can enjoy together time. We get plenty of that outside the gym
From a personal standpoint, many hot gym girls I knew would have destroyed me... they were high on debt, didn't have a full time job, 300$ brazilian blow out hairdos (well my wife gets them too) and lived with their parents looking for a white collar/wall street husband who works in NY, like passing from parents home to husbands home. Same interests sure but financing everything she brings to that table.
If a person has to make life decisions based on fitness, it would be very pinching when the long term impact slowly rises its ugly head.
You're right. A woman can't possibly have any interest at all in fitness unless she's a gold digger.5 -
I love hubs. He has very little interest in fitness...then again, I don't have all that much in it either. I do like working out, but I can appreciate a man that put on 30 lbs with me each time I got pregnant. And I haven't done laundry or changed the cat box in the 8 years we've been married. He's a total keeper, rockstar!0
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I need an equal balance of gymaholic and couch potato... having the same interests are pretty necessary in my opinion... especially if I decide to scarf an entire pizza and label it as gains. Gym partners just get that.3
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Forgot to say my husband also often rides his bike to and from work. And I also walk and take public transit rather than drive.
I think some people are reading way too much into what was actually intended to be a very light hearted conversation. We don't need to tell all of our entire life stories just to talk about if we like recreational hiking or whatever we do with our partners.1 -
NorthCascades wrote: »Cutaway_Collar wrote: »@DeficitDuchess for the win.
I love @rebel_26 response and @Villae81 who talks of lone time. Smug couples in the gym annoy me. Actually they annoy many others too with all the PDA and gym hall love.
My wife has a fulltime job. She also runs our house and keeps things in order. She has no time to work out and we just go on walks and she watches what she eats. I don't expect her to tag along to the gym so I can enjoy together time. We get plenty of that outside the gym
From a personal standpoint, many hot gym girls I knew would have destroyed me... they were high on debt, didn't have a full time job, 300$ brazilian blow out hairdos (well my wife gets them too) and lived with their parents looking for a white collar/wall street husband who works in NY, like passing from parents home to husbands home. Same interests sure but financing everything she brings to that table.
If a person has to make life decisions based on fitness, it would be very pinching when the long term impact slowly rises its ugly head.
You're right. A woman can't possibly have any interest at all in fitness unless she's a gold digger.
Yeah, it's only ok for men to go to the gym by themselves. No couples. And no women.1 -
That's how my gym feels about it
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My wife and I work out together, meal prep together, support and pick each other up when we have a "fat" day. It's really the most amazing help ever. I don't think we would have come so far without each other and it's a great hobby, for us both too.1
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nope they do not need to be into fitness but they do need to eat a vegan diet
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NorthCascades wrote: »Cutaway_Collar wrote: »@DeficitDuchess for the win.
I love @rebel_26 response and @Villae81 who talks of lone time. Smug couples in the gym annoy me. Actually they annoy many others too with all the PDA and gym hall love.
My wife has a fulltime job. She also runs our house and keeps things in order. She has no time to work out and we just go on walks and she watches what she eats. I don't expect her to tag along to the gym so I can enjoy together time. We get plenty of that outside the gym
From a personal standpoint, many hot gym girls I knew would have destroyed me... they were high on debt, didn't have a full time job, 300$ brazilian blow out hairdos (well my wife gets them too) and lived with their parents looking for a white collar/wall street husband who works in NY, like passing from parents home to husbands home. Same interests sure but financing everything she brings to that table.
If a person has to make life decisions based on fitness, it would be very pinching when the long term impact slowly rises its ugly head.
You're right. A woman can't possibly have any interest at all in fitness unless she's a gold digger.
Yeah, who knew a woman could't have a job, a place of their own and work out and be fit as well?
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My wife and I are both "into fitness" and always have been...I was a competitive track and field sprinter from 2nd grade through my senior year in high school. I also played football in high school, was on a club swim team for a few years, did gymnastics for about six years and dabbled in wrestling. My wife has played club soccer much of her life and was a rugby player in college...we both come from athletic backgrounds and that gives us a lot in common.
Pretty much all of my life I've dated girls/women who were "into fitness"...namely because when you belong to a particular group or scene you tend to also socialize with others from that particular group or scene...'cuz...well...you have *kitten* in common and similar interests. It would be pretty crappy to love cycling and hiking and otherwise being out and doing stuff and be with someone who wasn't into that stuff and I'm pretty sure that person would feel pretty much the same when I was out all day on a ride because they wouldn't understand WTF...
Of course, "into fitness" can also get pretty over the top too...I mean, I'm into it but I also have friends that make me look lazy...I couldn't get into that...fitness is important to me, but not my whole world...I do know people who really make fitness their whole world...and I figure they'd probably have to have a counterpart who was that way too in order to make it work...so I guess there are just varying degrees of everything.3 -
Yes it matters to me. I like someone who has similar interests anyway and it's easier to be supportive of each other that way..and on top of that it would be nice to have someone who I can do all those things with.0
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I've said this on another thread, living a healthy and fit lifestyle is really important to me. I simply wouldn't be happy with someone who didn't share that mindset.0
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