Juice cleanse

124

Replies

  • nutmegoreo
    nutmegoreo Posts: 15,532 Member
    edited December 2016
    nutmegoreo wrote: »
    For those who were asking what is special about the Groupon cleanse. it is apparently the magic of "pressing" that gives this elixir its power:

    "We don’t juice our juices, we PRESS our juices. Pressing produce helps keep the nutrient-rich enzymes intact and is the healthiest way for you to get your raw, unadulterated juices. Cold-pressing provides 3-5 times the nutrients and enzymes found in a pasteurized, juiced cleanse. Live more of your life in the RAW!

    Packed with healthy nutrients and enzymes, our juice cleanses are designed to help make your body feel detoxified and unhindered. Each of our cleanses will detoxify your body of accumulated impurities and leave you looking and feeling as if you were glowing. Our Juice Cleanse contains high quantities of protein as well as a healthy dose of essential minerals and vitamins. Juice from the RAW finds a comfortable medium between nutrition and deliciousness with our cold-pressed juice cleanse program."

    Also, for those expressing wonderments over the wondrous ingredients, they are apparently "pressing" romaine, spinach, carrots, apples and the other usual things that I get the old-timey way from the salad bar at work, but possibly they are getting the ingredients from unicorns, and not my salad bar (which also includes pickled pepper rings, which I don't see here):

    http://www.juicefromtheraw.com/pages/nutritional-info

    Finally, if you happen to be married to, theoretically, say, a professional chemist who also holds a double major in biology, whom you suspect might relentlessly mock you and debunk your magical juicing powers, not that this is intended to represent any real-life situation or entity, fear not: there is a helpful section on how to get your spouse to join you on your juicing journey, nay, pilgrimage: have him watch some youtube videos ("at youtube.com") with you ("After you watch those movies, you will be speaking all night about what you just learned and how you can use that information to improve your lives"), and then after you finish your cleanse, be sure that he then presents you with a nice dinner or better yet, a nice vacation:

    "Before you start your juice cleanse, become clear about your juicing goals and set a success gift. A success gift is something you decide to give yourself after you successfully complete your cleanse. You and your partner can treat yourself to anything from a dinner at a nice restaurant to something as exciting as a vacation. What you do is up to you, but having some extra motivation will make it easier for someone to agree to join you on your journey."

    So, as G.I. Joe says, "Now you know, and knowing is half the battle."

    mvvgidf65ne1.jpg


    Have you considered an exciting career in sales?

    Just because I lure you in with unicorns* and magical elixirs, what makes you think I would sully my integrity with anything to do with sales, or, theoretically, marketing?

    *Product contains less that .01% verified unicorn.

    I hear there is good money in advertising. You aren't willing to sell your soul to the devil for big cash?

    FYI, I don't believe your claims of maximum unicorn levels. I suspect you run a breading ground for them. That's why you're so good at what you do :wink:
  • angpowers
    angpowers Posts: 83 Member
    Yea, ppl on here can tend to NOT read the question your asking and offer "advice" that you did not ask for. To the point where your like wow -- some really think their "experts" on nutrition. haha Just laugh it off.

    For two days, you'll be find. Not sure that will be long enough to make you crazy with craving that chewing experience or anything like that. If anything, it might just help you wean from the rich foods and decrease your desire for them and sweets. Most juices, in my opinion, have a sweet taste -- even the veggie rich ones.

    And for two days, maybe you'll learn something about your body, juices etc and grow from there.
    Best of luck! :)
  • queenliz99
    queenliz99 Posts: 15,317 Member
    angpowers wrote: »
    Yea, ppl on here can tend to NOT read the question your asking and offer "advice" that you did not ask for. To the point where your like wow -- some really think their "experts" on nutrition. haha Just laugh it off.

    For two days, you'll be find. Not sure that will be long enough to make you crazy with craving that chewing experience or anything like that. If anything, it might just help you wean from the rich foods and decrease your desire for them and sweets. Most juices, in my opinion, have a sweet taste -- even the veggie rich ones.

    And for two days, maybe you'll learn something about your body, juices etc and grow from there.
    Best of luck! :)

    Yeah, I always get so annoyed when people try to help me in the "General Diet and Weight Loss Help" section.

    I demand blind support for every investment, no matter how fruitless. Anything else is mean and negative.

    "Fruitless"

    6wrec5fmnulz.jpg

    :)

    Snort!
  • ShammersPink
    ShammersPink Posts: 215 Member
    I demand blind support for every investment, no matter how fruitless. Anything else is mean and negative.

    That is only natural. You are a unicorn. You can do no wrong.
  • kimny72
    kimny72 Posts: 16,011 Member
    For those who were asking what is special about the Groupon cleanse. it is apparently the magic of "pressing" that gives this elixir its power:

    "We don’t juice our juices, we PRESS our juices. Pressing produce helps keep the nutrient-rich enzymes intact and is the healthiest way for you to get your raw, unadulterated juices. Cold-pressing provides 3-5 times the nutrients and enzymes found in a pasteurized, juiced cleanse. Live more of your life in the RAW!

    Packed with healthy nutrients and enzymes, our juice cleanses are designed to help make your body feel detoxified and unhindered. Each of our cleanses will detoxify your body of accumulated impurities and leave you looking and feeling as if you were glowing. Our Juice Cleanse contains high quantities of protein as well as a healthy dose of essential minerals and vitamins. Juice from the RAW finds a comfortable medium between nutrition and deliciousness with our cold-pressed juice cleanse program."

    Also, for those expressing wonderments over the wondrous ingredients, they are apparently "pressing" romaine, spinach, carrots, apples and the other usual things that I get the old-timey way from the salad bar at work, but possibly they are getting the ingredients from unicorns, and not my salad bar (which also includes pickled pepper rings, which I don't see here):

    http://www.juicefromtheraw.com/pages/nutritional-info

    Finally, if you happen to be married to, theoretically, say, a professional chemist who also holds a double major in biology, whom you suspect might relentlessly mock you and debunk your magical juicing powers, not that this is intended to represent any real-life situation or entity, fear not: there is a helpful section on how to get your spouse to join you on your juicing journey, nay, pilgrimage: have him watch some youtube videos ("at youtube.com") with you ("After you watch those movies, you will be speaking all night about what you just learned and how you can use that information to improve your lives"), and then after you finish your cleanse, be sure that he then presents you with a nice dinner or better yet, a nice vacation:

    "Before you start your juice cleanse, become clear about your juicing goals and set a success gift. A success gift is something you decide to give yourself after you successfully complete your cleanse. You and your partner can treat yourself to anything from a dinner at a nice restaurant to something as exciting as a vacation. What you do is up to you, but having some extra motivation will make it easier for someone to agree to join you on your journey."

    So, as G.I. Joe says, "Now you know, and knowing is half the battle."

    mvvgidf65ne1.jpg


    In for unicorn fruit!
  • angpowers
    angpowers Posts: 83 Member
    angpowers wrote: »
    Yea, ppl on here can tend to NOT read the question your asking and offer "advice" that you did not ask for. To the point where your like wow -- some really think their "experts" on nutrition. haha Just laugh it off.

    For two days, you'll be find. Not sure that will be long enough to make you crazy with craving that chewing experience or anything like that. If anything, it might just help you wean from the rich foods and decrease your desire for them and sweets. Most juices, in my opinion, have a sweet taste -- even the veggie rich ones.

    And for two days, maybe you'll learn something about your body, juices etc and grow from there.
    Best of luck! :)

    Most juices have a sweet taste because they're loaded with sugar. ;)

    hahaha well of course they are??
    Never said they weren't.
    I personally like the taste of a homemade juice.
    Would I do a "cleanse?" Nope
    But I'm not this lady and for her doing it for TWO days? Who cares??
    WinoGelato wrote: »
    angpowers wrote: »
    Yea, ppl on here can tend to NOT read the question your asking and offer "advice" that you did not ask for. To the point where your like wow -- some really think their "experts" on nutrition. haha Just laugh it off.

    For two days, you'll be find. Not sure that will be long enough to make you crazy with craving that chewing experience or anything like that. If anything, it might just help you wean from the rich foods and decrease your desire for them and sweets. Most juices, in my opinion, have a sweet taste -- even the veggie rich ones.

    And for two days, maybe you'll learn something about your body, juices etc and grow from there.
    Best of luck! :)

    What do you think you learn about your body by avoiding solid foods for two days to overcompensate from an indulgent vacation? Besides what it feels like to crouch painfully on the toilet for 48-72 hours?
    WinoGelato wrote: »
    angpowers wrote: »
    Yea, ppl on here can tend to NOT read the question your asking and offer "advice" that you did not ask for. To the point where your like wow -- some really think their "experts" on nutrition. haha Just laugh it off.

    For two days, you'll be find. Not sure that will be long enough to make you crazy with craving that chewing experience or anything like that. If anything, it might just help you wean from the rich foods and decrease your desire for them and sweets. Most juices, in my opinion, have a sweet taste -- even the veggie rich ones.

    And for two days, maybe you'll learn something about your body, juices etc and grow from there.
    Best of luck! :)

    What do you think you learn about your body by avoiding solid foods for two days to overcompensate from an indulgent vacation? Besides what it feels like to crouch painfully on the toilet for 48-72 hours?

  • angpowers
    angpowers Posts: 83 Member
    WinoGelato wrote: »
    angpowers wrote: »
    Yea, ppl on here can tend to NOT read the question your asking and offer "advice" that you did not ask for. To the point where your like wow -- some really think their "experts" on nutrition. haha Just laugh it off.

    For two days, you'll be find. Not sure that will be long enough to make you crazy with craving that chewing experience or anything like that. If anything, it might just help you wean from the rich foods and decrease your desire for them and sweets. Most juices, in my opinion, have a sweet taste -- even the veggie rich ones.

    And for two days, maybe you'll learn something about your body, juices etc and grow from there.
    Best of luck! :)

    What do you think you learn about your body by avoiding solid foods for two days to overcompensate from an indulgent vacation? Besides what it feels like to crouch painfully on the toilet for 48-72 hours?

    ^^Maybe that she'd learn "hmmm, I don't like the way I felt"
    Duh?!

    I think it's funny that so many are bashing her when she's curious to try something new.
    Good, bad or different ... I think you guys are just crazy to attack her.
    She bought it -- is going to try it -- and wondered if others have.
    Seems pretty simple to me.

    I don't think she needs a positive comment from myself to "save" her.
    So silly.
  • cerise_noir
    cerise_noir Posts: 5,468 Member
    So I got talked into doing a 2 day juice cleanse. Actually it's supposed to be 3 days but I know myself well enough to know I would hate that. I can handle 2 days. Anyone else ever do this?

    You mean, not eat solid food for three days? No. No man. That's like...Why would i do that?

    Right?! I'm in for chewing. It burns calories! ;)
  • snickerscharlie
    snickerscharlie Posts: 8,578 Member
    queenliz99 wrote: »
    I did a juice cleanse last night but it wasn't juice, it was eggnog. Not touching eggnog ever again.

    But but but...rum?
  • chemtrailz
    chemtrailz Posts: 43 Member
    eat a snickers
  • snickerscharlie
    snickerscharlie Posts: 8,578 Member
    So I got talked into doing a 2 day juice cleanse. Actually it's supposed to be 3 days but I know myself well enough to know I would hate that. I can handle 2 days. Anyone else ever do this?

    You mean, not eat solid food for three days? No. No man. That's like...Why would i do that?

    Right?! I'm in for chewing. It burns calories! ;)

    Don't forget to log it as exercise. :)
  • Alyssa_Is_LosingIt
    Alyssa_Is_LosingIt Posts: 4,696 Member
    angpowers wrote: »
    WinoGelato wrote: »
    angpowers wrote: »
    Yea, ppl on here can tend to NOT read the question your asking and offer "advice" that you did not ask for. To the point where your like wow -- some really think their "experts" on nutrition. haha Just laugh it off.

    For two days, you'll be find. Not sure that will be long enough to make you crazy with craving that chewing experience or anything like that. If anything, it might just help you wean from the rich foods and decrease your desire for them and sweets. Most juices, in my opinion, have a sweet taste -- even the veggie rich ones.

    And for two days, maybe you'll learn something about your body, juices etc and grow from there.
    Best of luck! :)

    What do you think you learn about your body by avoiding solid foods for two days to overcompensate from an indulgent vacation? Besides what it feels like to crouch painfully on the toilet for 48-72 hours?

    ^^Maybe that she'd learn "hmmm, I don't like the way I felt"
    Duh?!

    I think it's funny that so many are bashing her when she's curious to try something new.
    Good, bad or different ... I think you guys are just crazy to attack her.
    She bought it -- is going to try it -- and wondered if others have.
    Seems pretty simple to me.

    I don't think she needs a positive comment from myself to "save" her.
    So silly.

    Do you have any examples to share with us where people were bashing/attacking the OP?

    Because I saw none of that in this thread.
  • queenliz99
    queenliz99 Posts: 15,317 Member
    queenliz99 wrote: »
    I did a juice cleanse last night but it wasn't juice, it was eggnog. Not touching eggnog ever again.

    But but but...rum?

    And brandy and whiskey and sugar and cream and egg. Lol
This discussion has been closed.