We broke up because...
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He skinned my pet Yeti
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She doesn't have my fashion sense.0
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his name was so hard to pronounce
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He was a drug addict and tore apart the family0
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He stole from everyone and wore the same small shirt everywhere0
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He got jealous of the neighbors pool and put bubble bath mix in their pool filter to make a giant bubble bath.0
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She tried to conceal a body amidst the Bubbles0
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I found out he was sleeping with a stripper named Bubbles0
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Ran out of beer.0
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Wait we are going out!! Damn it I miss all the good things in life!!0
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She was always two steps behind0
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We had issues when I asked him to help me go pee on leg days!!2
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Was extra handsy.0
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Didn't know how to use his hands0
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She did, but only on everyone else!0
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Wouldnt use her hands on me0
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Caught him with someone else..trollop1
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Kept bringing more guys into her basement0
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She wouldn't kneel when I asked her to.0
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He worshipped me, literally.0
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He thought he was a God0
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She didn't appreciate my magnificence.0
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Far too magnificent for me..0
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My wife found out.0
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He had a wife0
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She was a Homewrecker0
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My husband didn't want to share0
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wouldn't talk to me0
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He never revealed himself0
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she was cheeky0
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